


Evolution

by PDX



Series: Oblivion [2]
Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F, F/M, USWNT
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-02
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2018-08-12 15:22:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 15
Words: 103,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7939600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PDX/pseuds/PDX
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the Oblivion of their world comes crashing down, the gals must work to establish a new life in the after math of their actions. A new era begins, one in which a new evil arises, one in which Tobin and a select four face the dark truths of their beings, including secrets that may put the lives of those they love in danger all while Ash searches for Ali alongside the Grounds Commander, Jeri. Will the gals be able to evolve from the past? Or will history repeat itself?</p><p>(If you haven't done so, Read the story "Oblivion" first)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Panic

**Author's Note:**

> AYE! Well, heres chapter one of Evolution. Hope you guys enjoy the start of the second journey. Make sure to comment questions, reactions, predictions or what you hope to see in the comments :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No Talex in THIS chapter but very vital, lots going on haha name POV's going forward. But yes Talex. Sorry for the confusion!

Panic

“This is a quick in and out mission for Hope, Theo and Becky. Syd and I will be the only ones searching. The warehouse as you see is big. Hope, Becks, I want you two on the far mountain range corner. Theo, on the corner horizontal to where Hope and Becky are. I’ll take the front door, Syd to my right. We enter at the same time. Helmets on, shadow mode”

“Shadow mode means no noise or lights”

“And this is why you’re with Becky” I joke at Hope as I stand in the middle of the hover craft telling the team the plan “But yes. With our helmets on, and thanks to the new technology, we can all communicate through our head gear, it won’t be heard. Just make sure not to yell, I would like to keep my ear drums. Also remember, I have private connections and if you want to talk out loud or encounter someone, molecule to talk outside of your helmet is on your control panel on your right sleeve” 

“Where do we come in” Pinoe asks as she leans against Syd’s locker

“You and Tim are arial mode. Once Theo disconnects the system blocking our systems you’ll be able to scan the warehouse and use thermal mode and basic sonar systems to get the layout and guide us through it. Until that happens, we’re blind. Only if one of us goes down, Pinoe you come down. If anything happens, priority is to warn Carli and have her warn the ground commander” 

“And us” Theo asks

“If fireworks go off, you best have your shades on to watch the show now suit up, we jump in five” 

I walk over to the front cabin where Tim’s at, flying the hover craft. 

“How long do you think it’ll take Theo to take down the blockage that isn’t allowing us to see inside” 

“About two minutes”

“Not bad”

“Not fast enough in my opinion, why didn’t you bring JJ or you know, Kelley fucking O’hara” Tim mutters under his breath

“Kelley is off limits now shut it and fly. Theo is capable of a lot, he just hasn’t been given the right stress” 

“You make sure he comes out in piece” Tim quirks his sight at me.

“You have my word” I reply with a nod. I head back into the main area of the hover craft and walk over to my locker. I glance at Hope and almost chuckle at the sight. 

“Hope, you’re putting it on backwards” I point out as she struggles to put on the harness

“Oh, that explains it” She whispers as she flips the harness over. I shake my head and proceed to put on my own hardness that will attach the small wing like parachute to my back. As I buckle the last attachment, I grab my helmet. It is much to my enjoyment that our suits are entirely black, including the small Athena logo on the top. I graze my finger over it before facing it the right way and putting it on. As I lock the helmet in place, a small gold light rims the inside glass and soon a straight line of gold buzzes across the screen. 

“Scout Heath, ATUS17” I breath as the helmet verifies my identify. The screen of my helmet goes dark before light up with the new system I developed. 

“Welcome Scout Heath” Frost voice rings in my ears, causing tears to well up in my eyes. Upon the creation of the squads new technology systems, I decided to use Frost voice only. Nothing else. I created a new sort of advanced technology, a new AI that is was in sorts the basics of Frost. Nothing fancy but enough to do its job. I maneuver the screen with my voice and soon enough I’m ready to go. I turn and find Becky a little startled. 

“Everything okay” I ask through a private connection, testing if it works. 

“It’s his voice” Becky breathes in response. I can hear the small chip at the end and know she’s teary too.

“I couldn’t leave everything in the past, not him” 

“He would be proud” 

“He would” I reply before dropping the private connection “Alright, Tim, Pinoe, can you hear me” I ask as I adjust some settings. 

“Loud and clear Scout” Pinoe replies loudly causing me to cringe. 

“Tim, how far from the ware house are we”

“A minute away”

“Open the drop” I order as I signal my squad to gather. 

“Be safe Tobin” Tim instructs

“Always” I reply before turning to talk to my small team “On the count of three, we jump, try not to land on high structures” 

“Why” Hope asks

“We tend to have bad luck on them” I respond referencing me falling from the tower.

“Right” Hope replies. 

“Alright, lets go set off some traps…1…2…3” On my cue, we all jump off the hover craft. My fear of heights is still existent but my desire to get back home in one piece is greater. I try my best to keep my down facing down with some angle to speed up my fall. I glance to my side as Becky zooms past me. _Show off._

“Wings deploy” I order as I’m 150 meters away from the ground. My suit responds to my command and soon I’m gliding through the air. I use my night vision to land on the ground. About 200 meters away from the warehouse. 

“Touchhhhh downnnn” Theo informs 

“Right behind you buddy” Becky adds. We hear hope as she lands face first causing us to burst into fits of laughter. 

“Let me be the first to officially welcome you to the club” Syd laughs as it’s not a surprise that she lands wrong. _Everyone does the first time._

“Syd you land” I ask

“Right behind you” She speaks and I turn to find her walking up to me. 

“Impressive” I reply causing her fake flip her hair. 

“Alright, proceed to position” I order everyone. Syd and I split up as we all run to our doors of the warehouse. 

“In position commander” Hope is the first to inform. _There we go Hope._

“Pinoe, any enemies outside” 

“Not that we can see scout”

“Alright, place your silent detonators on the door, 10 seconds, go” I order as I place a small grey bomb on the lock of the front warehouse door and backtrack a few feet. The small detonator goes off and we’re running. I swing the door open and hold my gun up as I enter the building. 

“Clear”

“Clear”

“Safe, I mean clear” Hope corrects causing me to slightly smile.

“Clear”

“It’s your turn Theo, go” I order as I proceed through the office of the warehouse. 

“Syd, find the box yet” I ask while I use my dark vision to read all the papers that hang around the office. 

“Not yet” Syd replies 

“Continue” I reply as I open a drawer from a desk. _Empty._ I continue to search the office for a clue, anything to lead me to dark agents. As I go to exit the office, a small note catches my eye. _What’s this_ I think as I peel the sticky note off wall with an arrow pointing to the left on it. _Left? Left…? LEFT. Fuck._ I curse to myself as the door connecting the office and ware house opens and I spring. 

“It’s me!” Theo yells at I hold my gun to his chest. 

“Gosh damnit, you couldn’t warn me” I breath as I drop my gun. 

“Theres something you should see” He breathes still shaken from my response. I follow him around the ware house until we reach Hope, Becky and Syd. As soon as I step within a responsible range of what I presume is the package Hope managed to get in the warehouse, my suit dies. 

“What the hell” I speak outloud as I smack my sleeve panel. 

“No luck, we tried that” Syd sighs 

“Hope, any idea what the hell they put in the box” I ask as I walk over to it and inspect it

“No idea but we’re in here alone and have no connection to Tim and Pinoe to alter them” 

“Well, they’re gone” I mutter as I hand Becky the sticky note I found. 

“Whats this”

“Their way of way of telling us they knew we were coming. Seal it up so we can take it back to Citadel to scan it for finger prints although it’ll probably be clear” I reply as I kneel before the large box. 

“So we told the grounds commander that tools and whatnot were in here, with two days here, what could they have possibly put in here” I ponder out loud as I grab my knife to prop open the box. Everyone gasps and steps away.

“Tobin I don’t think that’s a good idea” Theo’s nervous voice breathes. 

“Why not” I ask as I stick my knife between the wood and the top of the box and prop it open just a slight bit. Everyone, including Becky shelter their bodies as if a bomb will go off. _Oh please, they didn’t just leave a note for nothing._ “Are you guys really scared” I chuckle as I continue to use my knife to separate the lid from the wood panel. 

“I’m glad you find this humorous” Becky sighs 

“Well, can’t take life” I pause as I put my knife back in its holder and grab the lid “too serious” I pop the lid off and Syd immediately runs over to point her gun inside. 

“Don’t hurt me!” A man curled up inside yells as he looks at us with wide eyes. 

“Hands above your head” I order as I hand becky my gun. The man does at told and I see can just by the looks of it that he was kidnapped “On my count you slowly stand up, if you try anything my men will shoot you, you hear me” 

“I promise I won’t try anything just don’t shoot me” He begs. Theo walks over and turns on his guns light. I watch as the weak man carefully stands up in the empty box with his hands up high. 

“Turn around and place your hands behind your back” I order. 

“My names”

“Sir please don’t speak until you are cuffed” I interrupt. The man nods as he slowly turns around.

“Back up and place your hands on the box’s edge” I order. The man trips as he walks backwards causing Theo to shoot his gun at the ground as a warning. 

“Relax” I order “We’re not here to hurt you” I then proceed to put the cuffs on the man. As I go to put connect the cuff to his left hand he spins, grabbing something from his pocket and aiming it at my neck. I grab his arm in time in a swift motion as I kick the gun out of Theo’s hand and secure the suspect in a head lock. He passes out as I lay his body down. 

“I had him” Theo throws at me as he bends down to grab his gun and Becky begins to inspect the man. 

“No, you had nerves. We need him alive. He’s not a bad man”

“He tried something on you” Theo retaliates 

“He was kidnapped” 

“How do you know” Hope asks as she sticks her head over the boxes edge to see nothing inside. 

“His eyes, show sign of dehydration, he was slow at grabbing whatever this is from his pocket and his voice” I reply as I hold a need like thing in my hand. 

“He was kidnapped” Becky assures us as she hold up the mans uncovered wrists to show scars of prior hand cuffs “And that’s not all, they left another message” 

“What does it say” 

“One dead, plenty more to go” She reads out loud. 

“Syd search the perimeter, Hope go set out a signal outside for Tim and Pinoe, Theo you find a fucking way to get the lights on in here. Becky where is the secret under ground tunnel” 

“Office” 

“Mother of…Hope go go go! The commander is in danger! Call it in!” I yell as I run into the office. I search the floor and walls for the entrance to the underground tunnels but don’t find anything. I start to push a big cabinet out of the way and nonetheless find a burnt out control panel underneath the floor where the cabinet was. 

“The man’s secured” Becky informs me as she comes running into the office and finds me on the ground. The lights come on and I rise. I see a camera hidden in the corner and watch it zooms in on us. Without a second thought, I shoot it. In rage I go through the entire warehouse, shooting every camera except one. 

“Give me the note” I order Becky as I stand under the last remaining camera. Using a pen that I grabed from my left pocket, I scribble down four words on the sticky note and hold it up to the camera before shooting it. I let the sticky note fall to the ground and order Becky out with me. 

“Let’s play a game? That’s what you wrote” Becky asks as she follows behind me

“Well, this is childs play, sending an innocent man to do their job…we need the real deal” I reply as I walk to where Becky left the man tide up. I see Theo besides him, working on something. 

“What are you doing” Becky asks as I look over Theo shoulder. 

“This is what made our suits lose power, it’s also what was blocking our systems…but I should be able to just cut this and…” He pauses to cut a wire from the small device in his hand and our suits turn on. 

“Tobin! Tobin can you hear me” Tim’s desperate voice calls out for me

“Back on line, can you see us” I ask as I order Theo to secure the small device and for Becky to haul the man to the front door. 

“Is everyone okay” 

“Fine, did you warn Carli” I question as I follow closely behind Becky

“She is alerted. Pinoe and Hope are doing a perimeter check. I’ll base in two” I cut my connection with Tim and hold the door open for Becky to carry the man out. We wait until Tim settles the hover craft to carry the man over. 

“What is this…a prisoner” 

“He was kidnapped”

“Don’t forget he tried to kill you too” Becky inquires as Tim hustles the man back into the small cell. 

“Well, that is why I had you there. That reminds me, heres what he tried using on me” I reach into my pocket to grab the injection and hand it to Becky. 

“I’ll run some tests”

“I’ll talk to the world leaders” I respond as I walk over to my locker and sit. I remove my helmet and let my hair loose. Reaching over to grab my headset, the side door opens and in comes Theo along side Syd, Hope and Pinoe. 

“All clear” Syd informs me as she removes her own helmet. 

“Tim, lets clear out” I order as I put the headset on and wait for Carli to pick up. 

“Tell me everything is under control” 

“It is” I reply as I look around the hover craft, everyone getting out of their gear.

“Why are you so quiet then” Carli whispers. 

“We’re heading to Citadel, meet us there with the world leaders and the squads. Call in Sasic, we’re going to need Kanatos if we’re going to find these people” 

“It’s not called Citadel anymore you know” Carli reminds me

“Yes, well, it always will be to me” I remove the head set and lean my head back into the side of the hover craft. I hear someone sit down in the locker besides me and listen as they let out a long sigh. 

“You did good” I mutter with my eyes closed

“That felt like a training exercise rather than a mission” Hope confesses. 

“It’s only the beginning” I reply as I take a deep breathe and proceed to prop my boots off. 

“That doesn’t scare you” Hope’s voice sounds different then usual. _Is that actual worry or fear?_ I think as I use my scout senses to decipher her tone. 

“What? The combat or the journey” I ask as I place my boots under my locker. 

“The journey, it’s only the beginning. Aren’t you scared of the ride”

“It’s not a rollercoaster Hope, it’s a game. The prize…is yet to be known”

“And the price” Hope asks causing me to swallow hard. 

“That my friend, is something you don’t need to worry about” I reply as I stand and walk over to Becky’s medical room. I knock on the glass window knowing she’s very strict with the sanitation and state of her labs. She gets up from her chair and walks over to the door. 

“Anything” I quirk an eyebrow at her. 

“You’re not going to believe this” She breathes as she pulls me in and shuts the door. 

“I isolated the main chemical, or I should say chemicals found on the sticky notes and the injection and…are you aware of the periodic table” Becky asks as she walks over to a drawer and pulls out a periodic table.

“Yeah, chemistry, elements” I respond as I cross my arms and follow her.

“Well…The main component I found in the injection, its Fluorine” Becky says as she points to the element with the letter F.

“Okay? I took chemistry when I was very young, remind me what that is” 

“A very poisonous element. It’s chlorines big brother. It attacks the lungs, airways and eyes, effectively blinding and suffocating the person if its consumed or in your case, injected” Becky explains. 

“Okay, not to mess with chlorines big brother. And what’d you find on the sticky note” 

“Follow me” Becky orders as she walks back to the table she was at “I didn’t find a trace of fingerprints or anything. I know they used a pen from a common store so that’s useless but the paper itself had a weird texture so I scanned for”

“Becks, I don’t really need to know that much information” I giggle at her excitement with her findings. 

“Right. Well, the paper had traces of Plutonium” 

“Agh, an element I do know” I slightly laugh at myself

“The infamous number 94” 

“I thought Plutonium was everywhere? I mean, in the air and all after the experiments of the 1950’s and 60’s” I ask as I look at all her hologram screens. 

“That…is very true. Plutonium is found in all four regions, the whole biosphere is filled with it but in different quantities. Kanatos, Kardia…we weren’t the ones who experimented with Plutonium because”

“We can’t find that element here in our regions” I interrupt her. 

“Do you know what that means” Becky whispers as she looks out the window towards the others aboard the hover craft. I nod my head yes as I turn to follow her sight. Syd and Pinoe are giving Hope the big welcome to the squad as Theo records the prank. Turning back to Becky I see the small worry in her eyes. 

“Is there something else you found” 

“I, you know, I think the last results are wrong…I’m going to redo them” Becky quickly rushes to the back of her lab on the hover craft to grab new test tubes leaving me confused. I walk out of her lab and head to my locker to rest before we arrive to Citadel. 

* * *

**7 hours later**

“So what are you saying” Abby asks as Becky finishes presenting the traces of elements found in the injection and sticky notes. I glance at Carli who has more than just processed the information but who has arrived to the ugly conclusion of what has to happen. 

“She’s saying that these agents, the dark ones, they’re not rebels” Mitag replies as she picks on something on her suit. 

“I’m not following, are you” Abby glances at Hope who nods no. 

“What you don’t see Miss Wambach is that they aren't people from our regions. These elements, they aren’t found here. Kardia is the richest of all four regions, superior in technology and medicine, advancements in sorts. Our region is the basic energy foundation, we control power” Sasic replies unsurprised that the children of Axiom aren’t following. 

“The only region that has these known elements and the things needed to reach them is Huros” I add after Sasic. 

“So you’re saying, it’s out there. That Jeri’s hover craft and the other hover crafts…they weren’t hit by the storm, they were struck down” Abby trembles in disbelief. I glance at Becky whom in turn glances at Carli. 

“It’s too early to determine that” I reply exhausted as I lean against the door frame with my arms crossed “Right now all we can do is wait. Continue our small assignments, aid the ground commander. I sent them a message, the ball is on their side. All we can do now is counter attack” 

“I’m sorry but we don’t have time to waste here, this is a race against”

“I’ll stop you there sir, this isn’t a race, this is a game, a game of chess in sorts. So you hold yourself still because you’re not the one holding a gun waiting to get shot” Hope interrupts Daniel, a man from Kanatos whom is part of the world leaders. Hope glances in my direction and I shoot her a tight lipped grin. 

“Scout Heath will continue to do as such until they make their move. Until then, nothing of this gets out. As for Huros, our limited information on them is of no use. There is only one person on our side whom grazes mere knowledge on Huros surroundings but much to our disadvantage they are protected under the Commander laws. Confronting commander Jeri would be of risk to protocol Evolution therefore, we continue…But if the time comes, and things are far beyond our grasps, those laws may have to be broken” Carli finishes before glancing my way and giving me a nod. She along with the rest of the world leaders exit the room, leaving me, the squads, including Sasic and her team in a conference room. 

“Protocal Evolution eh” Sasic edges my shoulder. 

“Sorry not to include you, it was a fast decision” I breathe as I extend my hand to her. 

“No worries, we’ll be on the look out. We’re on the same side now, you can count on us” Sasic remarks as she shakes my hand. 

“I’ll be taking you up on that”

“At your disposal…Scout” She smiles as she lets go. We salut each other and she heads to her hover craft with her team and the recovered man whom is well drugged to ensure he is of no trouble on the ride back to Kanatos. I order the squads to load up as I take a walk around Citadel. I end up in front of the head quarters steps but don’t dare go in. 

“You’re not sure whether to embrace or hate the nostalgia” Michaels voice startles me. 

“We were fabricated by it. Now we’re expected to let it go” I breath as the night air does my mind some good. 

“To let go doesn’t mean letting go of the people” 

“Sir, if you don’t mind, why are you speaking to me” I turn at Michael at whom I have not spoken to since the confrontation of mission First Base with Carli in the kitchen. 

“Well, not only are you of interest to two thirds of my daughters but…I feel it too. Why else would have I agreed to hand over Citadel’s small secrets” Michael responds. 

“So that’s why you’re here” 

“I come here half of the week to expose the small spaces, hidden rooms and such to the world leaders. And it’s no lie that I had an attachment to my job as did you” 

“Don’t compare me to you. You don’t know anything about me. You may know what I did but you do not know whats inside me. You don’t know my nightmares and fears, you don’t know what its like to not dream. To not breath with your tired lungs, to see without eyes, to hear your own soul die. You don’t know what it feels like to not know who you are or where you came from or why it is that you’re so different from others. So don’t compare me to you. My attachment to my job as you call it was not a choice, it was my destiny and I want to know why. Why I’m still alive because in my count, I have died a thousands deaths yet my heart still beats. I didn’t choose this job, unlike you” I snap before leaving Michael standing at the front of the head quarters. 

When we arrive back at the safe house, I order everyone to rest. I grab my duffle bag and head inside. I avoid everyone at all cost and rush to my room. Locking the door, I hurry to the shower. The water drowns out everything that worries me and refreshes my memory, reminding me that I’m home. **_Temporarily._** My annoying dark side reminds me. Exiting the shower, I get changed into loose athletic clothes and walk over to the window. I stare at the hills that I grew upon for a short amount of time before walking to the door. My stomach growls as I reach for the door knob causing me to sigh. Swinging the door open, I stick my head out into the hall to make sure the coast is clear. Seeing no one, I tip toe downstairs. I hear a door open up stairs and quickly turn around. 

“BOO” Kelley screams as she pops out of no where. I bite my tongue in order to stop the scream. 

“SQUIRELLLL” I hiss at her as I grab her hand and pull her towards the garage. 

“Whoa, where are you taking me” She asks loudly causing me to roll my eyes. 

“Shut up would you” I demand as I make sure no ones in the garage. 

“Alright, you want to tell me what your problem is” Kelley half eyes in shock as I close the garage door. I look at her trying to find the words to express what I feel inside but nothing comes out. Instead, my body begins to shake as my breathing becomes rapid. Kelley’s blurry figure rushes to me as I collapse. She mutters questions and words I can’t put together as I panic in her arms. 

“Shhh just breath” Her words finally begin to make sense minutes later. I listen to her heart and focus on synchronizing my pulse to it. As my breathing settles and my panic escapes through my pores, I pull away from Kelley to wipe my face. She gifts me silence as I stare at the ground, confused and shocked that I had a panic attack. 

“Please don’t tell anymore” I whisper as I stare at my hands as they visibly shake slightly. 

“Tobin” She whimpers

“Please” I beg as I look to meet her worried eyes. She stares into mine and realizes I’m as worried and shocked as she is. Kelley nods okay before helping me stand off the floor. 

“Was it that bad” She asks a little nervous. 

“Hope thought it was a training exercise” I offer with a soft smile causing Kelley to roll her eyes. 

“Well, it’s only the beginning” 

“Yeah” I breath out with a cringe

“Sorry” 

“It’s okay, it’s the truth”

“Is that what has you rattled up” She questions as I sit at one of my work benches in the garage. I take a deep breath trying to comprehend myself why I feel so edged. 

“I, I don’t know. The mission went fine, everything went fine, literally, everything was…okay. I just, I think, I don’t know, it was just” _Easy_ I think as I pause, realizing what made me panic. 

“It was what” Kelley asks focusing her eyes on me.

“It was my first time on the field since I’ve taken on the responsibilities of a mother” I lie to Kelley. Truth be told, the reason why I panicked was because it was easy, easy for the dark agents to outsmart me, easy to put Jeri and Ash in danger, easy to snap once I realized we were being watched. _I’m not as sharp as I once was._

“That’s understandable” Kelley replies 

“Yeah, speaking of my little girl, where is she” I ask finally realizing I haven’t searched for her or Alex. _Alex._

“She left with your girl to the store” Kelley smirks at me. _My girl,_ sounds, odd yet welcoming. 

“It’s late, what are they doing out so late” 

“Relax, you can surprise them once they get back” With perfect timing, the garage doors open and bright headlights point at me and Kelley. I glance at Kelley whom stares back at me. 

“I’ll leave you guys alone” She mouths as she goes inside and I step aside for Alex to park. The back door pops open and Alice runs out. I kneel on the ground to meet her flying arms that wrap tightly around me. 

“Mommaaaaa” She half yells through a yawn. 

“Hey there babygirl” I chuckle as I stand with her in my arms.

“I missed you” She yawns again. 

“I missed you too” I sigh as I rub her back. Walking over to the drivers door, I open the door for Alex. 

“Hey” She breathes as she gets out and shuts the door. 

“Hey” I whisper back “Need help taking out the groceries” I ask as she pops the car trunk open. 

“I got it, you go on and get her to bed” I give Alex a soft smile before taking Alice inside and up to her room. As I tuck her in, she gives my forehead a goodnight kiss. 

“Goodnight Icy” I whisper before leaning in to plant a kiss on her cheek. Walking out of her room, I turn and gently close the door. Taking my time walking down stairs, I meet Alex in the kitchen with Allie, Kelley and Hope. Kelley’s eye watch me like a sly dog but subtle enough as I begin to help Alex put the groceries away. 

“You should really go to bed, you look tired” Alex remarks as she opens the fridge. I glance at Hope unsure of who she’s talking about “Kelley I mean” Alex giggles as she senses the confusion. 

“I will, soon” Kelley yawns 

“Come on, lets get you to bed. Night Scout, Night Al” Hope waves us off as she picks Kelley up and takes her away. My eyes lock with Kelley’s until Alex closes the fridge startling me. 

“Fuck, sorry” I breath as she stares at me worried “Did you say something” I ask a bit embarrassed. 

“Nope, but your silence does. Is everything okay” Alex asks as she folds the brown bags and places them under the sink. 

“Yeah, everything’s okay. My bodies just tired. I knew I had grown out of shape but not that bad” I half lie feeling my shoulders sore. 

“I would offer a bath but by the looks of it, you’ve showered so come on, lets go lay down” Alex grabs my hand and pulls me with her to her room. When she opens the door, she leads me inside. I close the door and tug on her hand, pulling her into me. I hold her tight as I rest my cheek on her shoulder. 

“Tobin”

“Shhh, just, stay like this for a second” I hush her as I close my eyes and inhale her soothing shampoo smell. She nods against my neck and I soak in the moment of silence “Sorry I didn’t call when we landed” I begin as I pull her towards her bed. 

“I understand, you had a lot on your plate. I don’t expect a call every hour” Alex replies as she lays down besides me. 

“I ran into your dad” I breath as I recall the situation. I feel Alex’s hand thats still entangled with mine tense at the mention of her father. 

“He’s still in one piece right” Alex jokes

“He is” I chuckle “It was civil, in sorts” 

“He offended you”

“More so or less, it doesn’t matter anymore. I’m just glad to be home now” I smile in the dark as I turn to meet Alex’s matching smile. We meet in the middle with pure need. It’s slow and gentle but surprising and as intoxicating as the first time. While neither one of us want to stop, my yawn pulls me away causing Alex to softly smile at me. 

“Next time” She whispers as she sits up

“Who says theres a next time, I’m a one night deal” I joke lightly feeling my eyelids get heavy. Alex’s mouth hangs slightly open as I giggle and pull her back into me. I let out a long sigh once Alex is settled into me “Night Lex” I whisper as my eyes close. 

“Night Toby” I hear her as she kisses my cheek and falls fast asleep with me. _I really am dreaming._

* * *

**ASH POV**

“Ash get up, we’re moving” Jeri orders me as she tosses my helmet at my stomach. I yawn as I rub my eyes and look around. After the last fight with the rebels and escaping the warehouse, I had thought I had finally found sometime to sleep. _Guess not._ Stretching my arms out wide, I sit up from the bags of sound I fell asleep on and put my gloves on. 

“Where are we moving to” I ask as I begin to suit up

“I’m sorry, theres a change of plans, we’re not going to be able to go scope out that hospital you wanted to check out” Jeri sadly informs me. It’s stings like a cut but I take it as a champ seeing that for one, Jeri is  at ties. 

“It’s okay” I breathe as I walk over to her commanding station “I thought we were safe here though” I ask as I look over her shoulder and see that we’re being taken a long ways away from here. 

“I thought so too, Carli got some intel, she was vague but quick to move. All the agents have already begun to clear our. We leave in two. Grab my bag while I check out the perimeter” Jeri replies as she begins to exit the tarp. 

“Wait, that’s my job” I call after her. She doesn’t stop as she leaves. I sigh knowing she’s just trying to make things easier on me as the mission to find my soul mate here in Kanatos has been rough. Shaking my head, I walk over to her desk and grab her duffle bag. Putting my helmet on, I run over to our hover craft and place her bag at her locker. Running back outside, I spot Jeri giving orders. 

“I want everything cleared, no traces” 

“Jeri, come on, we’re ready to go”

“Make sure everyone’s safe before” Her sentence is cut off when a bomb hits not too far away from us, sending us all to the ground. As I begin to stand, my ears rattle as they work to neutralize the commotion. I spot Jeri not too far away from me and quickly dig my feet into the dirt as I run to her. 

“Come on, we have to go” I yell as I remove my helmet and attach it to her suit seeing that she doesn’t have her helmet on. She coughs as I pull her with me towards the hover craft that’s waiting to take off. 

“Go go go” I order as we jump on the craft. The driver up front immediately takes off and I let my body lie on the ground. Looking over at Jeri, the medics quickly surround her to make sure she’s okay. 

“You good” A man from the medical team asks me as he extends his hand. 

“Fine, thank you” I reply as I stand. Walking over to the side window, I look back to where we were just seconds ago and see the last of our agents boarding a hover craft under heavy fire. _Those…aren’t rebels…they’re dark agents…how did Carli get that intel?_ I ponder as I watch the men successfully get away. 

“The Commander is well” A nurse informs me. I nod thank you and hustle over to where Jeri sits. 

“That was close” She breathes as she removes her armor. 

“It was” I reply as I take a sit besides her. 

“Nothing new to you I’m assuming” She asks as she hands me back my helmet 

“No, plenty of similar experiences in the forces” I shrug as I take my helmet and brush off the dirt. 

“Everyday, I grow more and more respect for you. For everyone who served, mostly the elite members. In Axiom, the squads were made to seem untouchable, unbreakable, made of finest minds and strongest bodies…but now that I’m here, doing this, the lies become clear. I see why it is that everyone hated us, the ones from Axiom” 

“It’s not your fault that you were lied to” 

“By my own father” Jeri swallows hard. After Michaels hearing, I thought Jeri and Alex would be elastic to know that we all voted forgiveness for him and not this constant battle whether it was right or not. As time ticks by, as life continues, as those who opposed the forgiveness of the board members begin to side with the reasoning of the decision, it seems that those who wanted this so much are starting to feel the wrath of our unanswered questions. 

“He did what he had to do to protect his family” I reply knowing that if I was in the same situation as him, I would’ve most likely done the same. 

“And when did that stop? When he realized that I was in love with Tobin or when he realized that Tobin is in love with Alex” Jeri questions with pained eyes. It hurts to look at them, tired, red, dry of life, wet of tears. 

“Jer”

“No Ash. No. I tried overlooking it but I can’t. He almost killed Alex. I don’t care if he wasn’t the one to give the direct order to bomb the tower down but he could have easily swayed Sepp into waiting until Alex was off. But he didn’t. He took advantage of Tobin’s love, he knew damn well Tobin wouldn’t let Alex die, so he let it happen. He let Tobin sacrifice herself in place of him…So look me in the eyes and tell me he did what he had to do to protect us. Look me in the eyes and tell me my father isn’t a coward and I’ll never speak of this again” 

I bite my bottom lip as Jeri voices her torn thoughts. My mouth opens and closes, trying to find words to say but I can’t. _He is a coward_ I think as Jeri wipes her eyes and gets up to walk to her small quarter in the hover craft. I sit at my locker and ponder what Tobin must be doing now. How she must be feeling as we’ve been away for over a month. _Alice, poor Alice, she must miss her mother so much._ A sad feeling sinks into the pit of my stomach as I think of what she must be doing right now. I shake the questions out of my head and reach into my coats pocket, the one right above my heart. Pulling out the now beaten paper Tobin gave me, I unfold it and stare at her picture. _I’m going to find you, and together, we’ll fix our friends._

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV (Few days later)**

“TOBIN” Kelley yells with fear as she finds me shaking on the floor. 

“I’m fi-fine” I shiver as my body radiates with panic. 

“That’s it, I’m telling” 

“No” I beg as I grab her hand in time. She sighs as she pulls me into her and rubs my back. The minutes tick by as my body and mind begin to settle. 

“I can’t keep hiding this from my best friend” Kelley whispers 

“She hasn’t asked anything…has she” I ask as I begin to pull away from her and lean my back to the glass wall. 

“No, but this is the third time I’ve found you like this…it’s been a week since you got home, a week since you came undone in the garage. Don’t you think somethings wrong”

“It could be from my nightmares” I half lie knowing well that my nightmares only contribute to the already growing situation. 

“It could be…What does Shawn say about them” 

“I haven’t had time to see him” 

“Is there anything I can do, besides just holding you when it happens. Is there any way I can ease some of that fear” Kelley questions with a sad smile. 

“I, ugh…just, just be there for Alex and Alice when I’m gone” I reply as I rest my head on my knees. Kelley nods okay before remaining silent. 

She leaves my bedroom around four in the morning and I remain seated, staring at the leg of my bed as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. About 30 minutes later, theres a knock on my door. I quickly stand and get changed into workout clothes, rushing out the front door and jogging for nearly three miles. 

“It’s amazing what a few months without mass production can do” I breathe as I take a seat beside Rampone who’s already rested from her run here. 

“To think we killed most of this” 

“It’s a small start” I ponder as I think of how much recovering our habitat has to go through to reach its full beauty. 

“Our grandchildren will thank us someday” 

“That they will” I say before taking a deep breath. 

“You ready” Christie asks a few minutes later. I nod yes and beginning my intense session with the greatest Scout alive. After being outsmarted by the dark agents, my life was put into perspective. When I was a Scout before, I had a squad to protect. That was it. But now, there are far more variables. Far more people who depend on me and wish for my home coming. The panic attacks are just mere consequence of those I am to face. All the recordings of the attacks by dark agents show some of the highest skills known to all regions. None, not even Tim, Christie and I have been able to wrap our heads around where they learned such precision and execution but what we have learned is that we need to rewind, relearn and improve everything we were taught. Since arriving back home, Christie and I have been training in secret. The reason why it is in secret is because while in the Elite academy, the trainee’s that were specifically selected such as I, endured intense sessions behind closed doors. Sessions without rules, each and everyone ran but prior Scouts. Christie was my elected advisor by Sepp himself, she was the Scout of Athena during my time in the Elite academy. She knows everything about me, my weak spots, my strengths, in overview, she is the only person that I should ever be able to outsmart me. This is why it is vital that she train me as she did all those times behind closed doors, the secrecy part is just to avoid having to explain why Rampone holds a loaded gun to my face as I’m on the ground before her breathless. 

“Your right arms disabled, your gun is three feet away, your knife is powerless, think Tobin, what do you do” Rampone breathes without a missing of the beat. _She’s almost twice my age and somehow fitter than I,_ I think as I breath hard, trying to concentrate how to get out of this situation. Rampone is about to pull the trigger when I push the gun away with my left hand and grab her writs with my right, pulling her into me. I take the gun and point it at her as she smiles in pride. 

“Finally” She breathes as I let her go and unload the gun, tossing it aside as it burns my skin.  

“You could’ve easily shot me” I mutter as I stand and begin to load up the weapons. 

“It’s just training, we need you alive. Theres no room for questions Tobin”

“And where was that answer when I was hanging from the edge of a building, covered in blood, a gun in your hand, ready to kill me for the final test” I push feeling as though she’s going too easy on me. 

“We had spectators back then. You needed to pass and I needed to make you survive” 

“Nothings changed Rampone, I still need to survive and I won’t do so if you give me a three-second time period to think. I asked you to do this because I know you were the only one capable of pulling the trigger, no hesitation” 

“You’re wrong you know…things have changed, including me. And you said it yourself, I was capable of pulling that trigger but a child full of hate no longer hangs before me. You’re a women now Tobin, full grown, breed by the hate, shaped by the hands of evil but I’ll tell you this, you’re no longer full of hate…you’re no hanging by a thread, theres no blood and it sure ain’t me pointing the gun at you. Just look where we’re at Tobin, in the middle of no where, a bullet through your brain would mean nothing. Back then at least it would’ve meant you’re incapable but now, now it would mean nothing. Now finish packing and carry the bag back home” Rampone orders before running back in the direction we both came from. I taste the bitterness of her words, unsure if I should be offended or thankful. Shaking the thoughts from my head, I finish loading the last gun and quickly tie the ends of the bag and sprint back home. I make it back in a record 17 minutes and rush to the secrecy of the garage. Sliding the backpack of weapons under Christie's car, I walk in through the garage door only to find Alex already awake, sipping on some warm coffee. 

“Morning” I breathe as I walk over to her and kiss the top of her head “You’re up early” I whisper not wanting to make a lot of noise. 

“Chris and I have a meeting with the donators for the new project at nine along with the world leaders” She yawns. I smile at how cute she looks with morning hair and lean in to kiss her forehead. As I begin to pull away, she holds me still “Where were you this morning” She whispers as she looks up at me. 

“Went for a morning run” 

“Every morning” She asks with a whiny voice

“I have to stay in shape” I reply as I reach behind her to steal some coffee from her cup. 

“Tobin” She stops me, grabbing the cup from my hands and placing it back on the counter “And sneaking out of my room after I’ve fallen asleep” I swallow hard as I hadn’t anticipated this conversation happening. 

“I, ugh” 

“Momma” I’m interrupted by Alice’s tired voice calling me from upstairs. Alex’s sighs as I rush to greet my little girl at the top of the stairs. 

“Hey, shouldn’t you still be sleeping” I ask as I swoop her up and carry her down. She nods yes as she yawns and curls up in my arms “Come on, you can join Auntie down here while I shower”

I take Alice to Allie’s bedroom where my best friend lays spawn across the bed as Jose is out of town. Allie immediately spoons Alice and both fall back asleep before I exit the room. As I walk back to the kitchen I’m both relieved and saddened to see Christen. 

“Morning” Christen beams as she prepares herself some tea. 

“Is that…” I inhale deep as I rush over to the stove to smell the oh so sweet aroma of her signature tea. Christen’s big grin answers yes for me and I bow down before her causing her to laugh. 

“Am I missing something” Alex’s asks a little stunned and confused by my actions. 

“Tobin here is obsessed with this tea…I don’t know why since it’s just”

“SHHHHH don't tell her, just let her try it herself” I hiss at Chris as I stand from the floor and grab three mugs. Christen shakes her head as I serve the tea. As Alex takes a sip of the tea, both Christen and I stare with anticipation. 

“It’s…amazing” Alex smiles as she takes another sip of the tea

“Right on” I smile as I high five Chris who giggles at me. 

“Is that what I think it is” Becky asks as she stretches her arms and walks over to us. I nod yes and Becky immediately takes Alex’s cup. 

“Hey! That was mine!”

“Was” I laugh as Becky raises her eyebrows and waves goodbye as she opens the sliding door and disappears to the hammock outside. Alex pouts causing my insides to turn. Seeing that Christen isn’t going to give Alex her cup, I give Alex mine and take her coffee cup. I turn to see Christen sipping her tea giving me a looking. Furrowing my brows, I chug Alex’s coffee and wash the mug. By the time Christen and Alex have to head out, everyones has either gotten up or arrived for breakfast. 

“Hey Amy, could you watch Alice while I go say good bye” I ask over the table as I pick up my plate. 

“Sure thing, be back soon, I want to take Alice and Ryan swimming” 

“Alright captain” I smile as I toss my plate in the sink and rush out the door. 

“Found you” Alex scares me as she jumps out of the bushes by the walkway. I give her a glare as she runs away from me. We spend three minutes chasing each other around the lot of the house until Hope comes out of the house and gives us a weird look. 

“What” I ask as I nudge Alex’s head 

“This is going to take some getting used to” She breathes as she opens the door of her sports car. 

“What is” Kelley asks as she joins the trio. 

“Those two” Hope nods our way as she lifts her shades

“I for one find you two so cute” Kelley smiles as she holds Hopes waist. 

“You find every couple cute” Hope remarks 

“Oh shut up and tell me you love me” Kelley whines as she tugs on Hope’s shirt. Hope tries to play it off cool but Kelley’s glare forces the Hope to give in to her request. Both Alex and I begin to laugh at how whipped Hope is. 

“Yeah Tobin, tell me you love me” Alex giggles

“After you” I grin as I grab Alex’s waist and bring her in for a kiss. Alex smiles into the kiss before breaking it to whisper the three magic words. 

“I love you too” I breathe as I kiss her forehead and walk her over to Hope’s car. 

“So why aren’t you guys driving their in separate cars” Kelley asks as she shuts Hope’s door. 

“To save gas” Christen answers as she closes the front door and makes her way over to Hope’s car. 

“Right” Kelley replies. We make way for Hope to reverse and watch as they drive off to Citadel. 

“I want to ask Hope to marry me” Kelley blurts out as the car is out of sight. _WHAT?!_

* * *

 

**Ash’s POV**

“You good” Jeri asks as she sits besides me on the threaded bags full of sand. 

“Yeah” I breath feeling my body a little sore from the last few ruffles with the rebels. 

“Good” Jeri sighs as she rests her head back on a sand bag. I know somethings up, it’s hard not to tell when you’ve been around the same person for the last two months yet I don’t ask. I’ve come to know Jeri well, almost like I knew everyone on the squad back when we were in the forces and I know that she’ll talk when she’s ready. 

“Its good to finally get a break” I disrupt the silence as I slowly feel my body and eyes growing tired. 

“Yeah I-”

“Commander, we got intel that the rebels are stationed in a house not far from here, 400 meters at the greatest” An agent comes up to us, interrupting our first real break. Jeri waves off the agent and slowly rises. 

“Guess we spoke too soon” She sighs as she offers a hand. I take it and hop off the sand bags following closely behind her. 

“Guess we did” I mutter as I load my gun. 

Jeri and I lead an armed group of agents towards the location where the rebels hide. Turns out, the intel was right. We stun the group of rebels using very small ammo and quickly tie up the individuals scattered around the empty house. I glance at Jeri who’s getting information from her men outside. She holds the wired connection against her ear, trying to make sense of what they’re saying. 

“That wasn’t too bad” I breath as I remove my hands from my hips and begin to take off my armored vest in the middle of the empty building. 

“ASH NO” Jeri yells as she throws herself onto me. The gun shot echoes off the walls of the empty living room where we were standing in just seconds ago. Jeri’s body crashes into mine as the glass of the living room shatters, pieces flying everywhere, slicing small cuts on my bare arms. My shades fall as we land and a sharp piece of glass finds new shelter in my back. 

“JEri” I cough out as people yell in my ear piece “Jeri” I ask again as I rub my eyes and push myself off the floor. The blood that splattered on the walls and face is not mine but Jeri’s. “HIT, COMMANDER WAS HIT” I yell into my earpiece as I turn Jeri’s body over and search her body for the wound. As I find that she’s been hit in her upper right shoulder, Jeri begins to cough. 

“I’ve been shot” She mutters a little distorted

“No kidding” I giggle in panic “Lets get you out of here” I breath as I get word that rebels are on the way. Jeri nods okay as I help her stand. She leans on my shoulder as we run to the hover craft. Immediately she is taken to the small medical prep room where they extract the bullet form her shoulder as a nurse seals up my wounds. When Jeri is cleared from the small surgery, I wobble my way over to her room. 

“Hey there” I greet with a knock on the door frame. 

“Hey” She smiles as she sets down a book she’s reading. I walk in and let the glass door slide shut. 

“You didn’t have to do that for me” I breath as I take a sit beside her. 

“Well, you’re not supposed to remove your armor until you get on the hover craft either but you did. You could’ve been kill and I rather get a lecture from the world leaders about getting shot than having to take your dead body home” Jeri shrugs as she yawns. 

“So you know what this means” 

“We’re going back to Kardia” Jeri breathes as she straightens her back, whimpering slightly as her ribs and shoulders move. I nod yeah as I rest back into the chair, whimpering myself as the stitches on my back ache “I don’t think we’ll have time to go to the safe house. I know the rules, I get shot or something, we have to meet with the world leaders blah blah blah but we have to finish up that town before we can think of a week break. They’ll want me on bed rest but my priority is clearing that town. So help me come up with an excuse while we fly there” Jeri yawns out the last part. I turn to respond but instead find her fast asleep, in peace for once. 

“Goodnight Commander” I smile as I curl myself on the chair and fall asleep myself. 

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

I sit on the steps of the house with Amy and Lauren. We watch the sunset as the kids sleep inside, soaking up our time together. 

“So Lauren, if I’m right, Tobin isn’t married and she has a kid…what gives, we want more nieces and nephews ” Amy laughs

“Okay, slow down, we’re just getting started in this new life and you already want me to have kids” 

“I mean she’s right, what’s the hold up” 

“Nothing, there is no hold up, but we want to contribute more to the projects and all until we decide to start a family” Lauren shrugs off. I glance at Amy who seems to take the answer as well. Leaning my head against Lauren, Amy begins to crack jokes. We spend a good hour laughing at our ridiculous stunts as kids until Hope’s car appears in the drive way. No music is playing as Hope parks the car in the garage meaning something is wrong. Amy and Lauren immediately rush inside as I rush to the garage. Hope opens and slams the drivers door as Alex does the same on the passengers side. Christen is the only one whom opens and closes the door calmly. 

“I’m afraid to ask” I huff as everyone stares at me. 

“Hope declined our”

“Hold up” Hope interrupts Alex lifting her hand to stop her “I didn’t decline anything”

“Well you didn’t vote either”

“Because there was”  

“I don’t care what happened we just needed a yes or”

“Care to fill me in” I whisper as Christen tip toes over to me as the two children bicker. 

“So we had gotten through the whole proposition when the world leaders got word on something…I don’t exactly know what it was but they rushed out. We just needed Hope’s vote but she postponed it. It sounded serious but Alex has been very passionate about this specific project”

“Because it’s a project close to her home” I interrupt “Sorry” I blush realizing that I had interrupted her. 

“It’s okay” She smiles “But yes, that’s exactly why. And while Hope isn’t really apart of the world leaders anymore, she’s only there to continue her cover since she’s apart of the squad now, Alex grew mad and now we’re here” Christen breathes as she stares at Hope and Alex fighting. 

“You said they got word on something, did Hope get any information? As you said she’s only with the world leaders since that’s her public appearance but still”

“Nope, she was a little annoyed that Carli wouldn’t let her in on it” 

“I’m going to make a quick phone call” I remark as I walk inside leaving Hope and Alex to argue over nonsense. 

* * *

 

“SHE WAS SHOT” I yell into the phone as I stop pacing around my office. 

“FUCK TOBIN I told you not to yell” Carli screeches 

“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me sooner” I demand feeling the anger boil inside “And where the fuck was Ash. The hell you better start giving me answers Carli or I swear I will”

“Calm down Tobin, for fucks sakes you sound like an over protective boyfriend” Carli remarks causing me to settle down. 

“She’s my partner in parenting Carl. What do you expect me to do” I breathe as I let my body fall onto my rolling chair. I close my eyes and take a deep breath “You should have seen me when I found out you were in the hospital Carls” I whisper as I recall that day “When I found out the seriousness of your injuries, that you had lost more than just yourself but also a bundle of joy…I was crushed. So you should know better, that when a loved one is hurt, I hurt too” I breathe out 

“I know, I know. That is why we waited until she arrived here in Citadel to tell you” 

“I’ll head over” 

“Tobin wait”

“I’m bringing Alice. See you soon” I say before hanging up the phone. Quickly rushing to my room to change, I run to Alice’s room and pack her a small backpack knowing well she won’t want to leave Jeri’s side. 

“Leaving somewhere” Alex’s whisper causes me to momentarily stop what I’m doing. 

“Citadel”

“Wrong name” 

“Yeah I know” I breath as I zip up Alice’s bag and close her closet door “Right now I just don’t care for it. Jeri was shot and Ash is a little racked up too” I inform her as I hand Alex Alice’s backpack. 

“WHAT” She yells as I tell her to hush. 

“Yep, so go pack your bag, I’ll meet you in the car” I whisper as I pick up my sleeping angel and head to the car. 

“You sure you don’t want her to stay with me” Amy asks as she stands besides the car door. 

“She misses her mommy and I think it’ll do her some good to see that Jer’s out there making a change”

“You guys really don’t hide anything from her do you” Amy asks implying that Jeri and I keep Alice very update with current events and history. 

“Nooope” I hum as I close the back door gently “We don’t hide anything….except that” I say with a glance at the garage door which Alex just opened. 

“Better tell her soon” 

“I will” I whisper as if Alice could hear me in her sleep

“No Tobin, I’m serious. The longer you hide it from her, the harder it will be” 

“I’m ready” Alex joins in. Amy lets the subject go as she smiles at Alex and wishes us a good drive to Citadel. 

“Was that…weird or was it just me” Alex asks me, noticing Amy’s distant behavior towards her as she slips back into the house. 

“Just you” I breathe, opening the passenger door for Alex. 

“Oh wait, I have to do something” Alex stops me as she gets out of the car and rushes to a cabinet in the garage. _Is that…cat food?_

“Cat food” I ask confused as I follow Alex out of the garage to a small empty bowl outside. 

“Yeah, for my cat” Alex replies as she empties some of the food into the bowl. 

“Excuse me, what cat” 

“The kitten, the one from your old quarter” Alex explains a little offended that I forgot about the darn thing. 

“You still have it” I ask both horrified and surprised

“Why are you so shocked” 

“I just, I don’t know, I forgot the thing even existed, where is it”

“It’s a he and he has a name”

“Which is” 

“Themelio” She smiles as she stands. 

“Themelio…greek for the word found” I smile seeing that his name is given by the way he was found. 

“Exactly” 

“Thats…cute…but, like where is _he._ Aren’t you worried he’s out there lost or that the pups will hurt him”

“He is out there exploring, I was scared at first but Christen’s not a cat person so I had to make a decision…Christen or Themelio” Alex huffs causing me to start laughing. 

“I’m sorry…I just, are you, Alex Morgan, warming up to none other than Christen Press” I tease entertained by Alex’s sudden change of heart with Christen. 

“Hey now, she’s still on the watch list. She’s too likable. I mean, even I like her, she’s amazing, that makes her a threat”

“A threat? Really now” I laugh

“Yes, now come on, lets get going” Alex pulls me not wanting to embarrass herself more as she talks. 

The drive to Citadel is far longer than I would have liked but precautions must be taken with my little girl in the car. Abby is the first out to greet us as I slip Alice into my arms and head inside. 

“Here, she can sleep in here” Carli instructs as she opens the door to a room she set up specifically for Alice. I lay Alice on the bed she set up and cover her up with the blankets Carli managed to find “It’s not much but I did with what I could to make it feel homey for her” 

“Thank you” I whisper as I close the door and stare Carli in the eyes. A part of me senses her uneasiness around Alice. It’s not a surprise to anyone that Carli avoids the topic of her miscarriage but it is a surprise that Carli can even stand to look at Hope and Abby knowing they were the ones who were basically responsible for it in the first place. Sometimes I wonder, if things ever do settle down, if she’ll break, if she’ll hate Abby and Hope as it is in her right to do so “You know, Alice notices it” I speak with a soft voice. Carli turns away and I back off. She leads me down to the medical floor and I’m cleared. As I walk behind Carli, the anticipation to see Jeri and Ash grows. I look through the glass walls, searching for any sign of them. 

“Over there” Carli points to a private area, far from where Jeri’s squad is. My feet move across the floor without friction, I push the curtain open and meet Jeri’s eyes immediately. Theres no time in between me and her as my arms wrap around her tightly. I inhale deep expecting to smell her natural aroma but instead am disappointed by the tangible take the war has had on her every feature. 

“You’re safe” I breathe into her hair. 

“I am now” She whispers as she holds onto me tighter. 

“And Ash” I ask as I pull away, searching for my main. 

“Right here” Ash grins as she exits the restroom. Immediately we hug tight as I hold the back of her head instead of her back knowing she has stitches. 

“You lucky son of a…you never try some shit like that again you hear me” I lecture Ash with a soft voice. 

“I learned my lesson” She giggles as we pull away. 

“Jeri” Alex’s voice causes all of us to turn. Ash and I watch as Alex rushes to Jeri’s side and clings to her older sister. It’s only seconds before Jen comes running into to join the two. 

“Her parents” Ash asks as we leave the three alone. 

“Carli is holding them off, until Alice and I leave” I inform as I help Ash sit on a work bench not too far from Jeri’s area. I pour Ash and I some coffee as we look at the three Morgan sisters catching up. 

“Things are getting more serious than I thought” Ash breathes, forcing me to look away from Jeri’s elastic eyes as she finally gets to see her family. 

“Tell me about it” I reply without thinking. Ash’s eyes furrow at me and I know I slipped up. _She can’t know about Protocol Evolution, she cant_ “With Alex I mean” I whisper knowing that I’m throwing Alex and I under the bus to keep protocol evolution under the radar. Ash’s eyes stare at me as I stare at my mug. _Theres no way out of this one thats for sure._

“So, thats it huh” Ash breathes in disbelief. I cringe at her tone of voice and feel the pang of guilt inside. 

“Ash” I try as I look up but she shakes her head and looks in the direction of Jeri. 

“She loves you” 

“I know”

“Do you Tobin” Ash turns to me with pained eyes causing me to feel the heaviness of the situation and how bad it looks. _How bad it really is._ I’m not surprised that Ash is protective over Jeri, nor did I expect a congrats from her as she has grown close to Jeri. But I thought expecting this reaction would have made it hurt less. _Guess I was wrong._

“I, it, I can’t…I have no words Ash. I wish I could tell you that I’m sorry for loving Alex but-I”

“Save it Tobin, we all knew it would be Alex…Maybe some of us had hope you’d choose Jeri but deep down, we all knew we were lying to ourselves. Including her, she knew Tobin. She’s always known from the beginning that your heart belonged to her sister. Can’t blame her for trying” Ash replies before taking a sip of her coffee. 

“And I don’t. I don’t blame her. If anything, I know, that I loved her, I do love her. It’s just, Alex”

“You’re telling this to the wrong person”

“I know, but you can’t blame me either. I’m literally torn with the thought of having to tell Alice. She’s going to hate me, she’ll hate Alex and”

“Do you really think that? That Alice would do such thing” Ash breathes with surprise. 

“I mean, I don’t know. She lost her father in the forces, her mom died from a fucking disease I could’ve prevented, her second mom is the new commander whom she doesn’t get to see, any less know that she was shot, her damn aunt who happens to be her god mother as well is the girl her third mom is in love with and to make matters worse, her other god mother is away leaving her stuck with me. The one who stirs up all the trouble” I mutter with annoyance that I seem to be the cause of all the problems around here. 

“My gawd, when did Tobin the stressed commander come back. Jesus Christ, read the bible, talk to Shawn, do something for heavens sake Tobin. Get your head of out that zone, you’re no longer the one in charge. If anything, that little girl is blessed to have you. You are an amazing parent, you and Jeri combined have raised her better than Amanda would’ve expected. If she’s anything like her mother and you two, I know that in the end, she’ll be happy for you two. Hells know if Jeri can be happy for you, Alice can be too” Ash exasps as she finishes her coffee. Her words stuck me hard as I drink the rest of my own coffee. _Jeri is happy for me? Or will she be? Can she sense that I have made my decision?_ I ask myself as I look back in the direction of her area only to find her looking at us. 

I stand and leave Ash at the work bench as I walk to Alice’s room. As I enter she stirs and I smile knowing she’ll wake any second. 

“Icy, baby girl” I whisper as I kneel by the edge of her bed. 

“Momma” She ask confused not to find herself in her own bed. 

“Morning little sunshine” 

“Where are we” She asks as she sits up in her bed and rubs her eyes. 

“Come on, I have a surprise” I smile instead as I carry her out of the room. Her curious eyes wonder every detail of the halls, trying to grasp onto everything, trying to figure out where we are or where I’m taking her. 

“Are we somewhere safe? Did something happen” 

“Yes and yes” I answer honestly as we reach the lower level. 

“Can I know where we are”

“I rather you just close your eyes, I’ll tell you when to open them” Alice nods okay against my shoulder and I proceed past the injured agents and towards the area where Jeri is at. Ash waits outside of the area with a big smile. On the count of three, I step inside and Jeri’s small gasp when she catches sight of Alice is enough to get Alice to run out of my arms and into Jeri’s. 

I can’t help the tears that well up in my eyes as I watch Jeri begin to cry as she holds Alice with dear life. Alex bumps her shoulder against mine, offering a soft smile before leaving the area with Jen and Ash. I walk over to the chair in the corner and sit down. Allowing the two to catch up. Alice plays doctor, helping Jeri’s doctor change her bandages and even getting to check her vitals. It amazes me that Jeri is not worn out by the time Alice falls asleep by 9. 

“Here, let me move that” I quickly stand from the chair and remove the tray of food Alex and Jen brought in for Jeri and Alice. As I clean up her bed and help Jeri feel comfortable, I sit down and stare at the two with a smile. 

“She’s so peaceful when she sleeps” Jeri breathes as she runs her fingers through Alice’s hair. 

“I think it’s just you” I whisper causing Jeri to look up at me for an explanation “Yeah, you know, when she’s with me, she’s…wild. We’re hiking or on the boat or swimming with Ryan”

“Play dates” Jeri asks, happy at the news that Alice and my nephew spending more time together. 

“Yeah, but with you…she’s calm, held together, more intellectual and spiritually alive. With my she’s physically alive but with you, you’ve always brought that out of her, out of people” I breathe with a smile. 

“I, thank you” 

“Any time…are you sure you want her to sleep with her? I can bring her back to her room”

“It’s okay, she would be upset if she woke up without me and I’ve slept in worse positions”

“But your wound”

“It’ll heal” Jeri yawns. I stand and walk over to her and help her get settled in, as I bring up the blanket to cover her and Alice, I lean and plant a kiss on Jeri’s head. She breathes in deep and lets it out slowly as I pull back. 

“Goodnight Jer”

“Goodnight Tobin” She whispers as I slip out of her area and yawn myself. I stretch my arms and walk over to where Alex, Ash, Jen and Abby all sit. 

“They’re out already” Abby asked a bit surprised. 

“Yeah, Alice wore us out” I giggle as I ruffle through the food Jen bought trying to find something to eat myself. 

“Oh, your foods over here” Jen says raising a bag which hot take out. I smile at her and sit beside her and begin to munch down on the food. Once I’m finished, I take the trash and place it in the trash can near by. 

“Well, I’d love to stay and chat some more but matters need attending” Abby says as she glances at a Kanatos world leader who calls over for her. We all share our fare wells and watch her leave. 

“Well, I have to get home too. Can’t keep my husband waiting, Al do you want to come over or do you want to stay” Jen yawns. Alex turns her head to me and I give her a go. 

“I’ll be back before sunrise” She whispers in my ear as we hug goodbye. 

“It’s okay, spend the day with your sister. Alice and I aren’t leaving for a while” 

“You sure”

“Positive” I yawn as I let her go. She sighs okay and leaves with Jen as Ash and I sit back down on the cement floor. 

“Who ever knew we’d be back here huh” Ash asks as she lays down on the cold floor. 

“Shouldn’t you be in a bed” 

“I always feel like I’ll drown on them”

“Same” I whisper as I lay down besides her. 

“Tobin” Ash whispers a few minutes later as I begin to fall asleep.

“Yeah” I reply wit my eyes closed. 

“Do you…never mind” Ash stops herself causing me to open my eyes. 

“Just ask Ash”

“No it’s stupid, forget I said anything”

“No, come on, just ask”

“I, okay” Ash pause to swallow her fear evident in her voice “Do you ever feel like you’re being watched” Ash whispers as if someone would hear. The question is a little startling but none the less unsurprising. 

“Always” I reply honestly. 

“Really” Ash asked surprised. 

“Yeah, I mean, I guess its just cause we’re here in Citadel…they used to watch us like hawks here” 

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. Night Tobs”

“Night Ash” I whisper once she’s asleep. 

 


	2. Training...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay when I wrote this, it ended up being really long so I split it into two chapters so...does that count as two updates? haha, well I'm making some progress with Talex but obviously in a world where you aren't exactly alone nor is life very easy, that'll be strained a little (or a lot). 
> 
> Also want to point out the chapter 3...the drama starts. Haha while it is a second story, I think its just an add on to Oblivion so I want to get right to it. Hope you don't mind the small calm going down the drain so quick and if you do...wait for chapter four, it'll be a bit more soothing, lots of details and such about the past of the select four and Tobin.

Training…

“Tobin, you need to calm down” Jamison calmly insist as I try to move my leg from under the fallen tree. 

“But my leg! It’s stuck” I yell as the rain pours down harder. The panic inside me rises as the more I move, the more the tree sinks into the mud pressing down harder on my leg. 

“Just listen to my voice Tobin and do as I say” Jamison yells “Breathe in deep and exhale slowly. Let your nerves flush away with the rain. Let the fear inside drain and using the head of yours, find a way out” 

“I can’t” I cry out as the fear within me rises

“You can do it Tobin, just breathe”

“I, okay” I reply as I close my eyes and do as he says. The rain roars, taking the air out of me as I repeat Jamison’s words in my head. _Almost there, almost, just one more…_ As I get ready to kick my right foot in the mud again, thunder strikes a tree near by sending it to its death, taking surrounding trees down with it. I watch the mud slide begin and estimate that I have about 45 seconds to escape before I’m dead meat. My first instinct is not to yell for Jamison but rather to survive. I look down at my left leg that is stuck under the tree and repeat Jamison’s words one more in my head. _You can do it Tobin, just breathe._ With all my strength, I kick the tree using the rain to my advantage to push it off the hill. As it rolls off my foot, I look up and see that I’m about to be swept away by the mud slide until two pair of arms pull me out of the way. I cry with my eyes closed as Jamison holds me against him. 

“It’s okay, your safe now little one, I have you” He whispers into my ear as the sound of the rain eyes out and the sound of Alex’s pleading voice fills my ears. 

“It’s okay Tobin, it’s okay, your safe now, I have you” She whispers into my ear as my eyes spring open. I look around the area with distortion as I move away from Alex, heaving for air, yearning for Jamison.  

“Tobin” I hear Kelley’s voice yell in the distance “Tobin, I’m here, I’m right here” She repeats as she wraps her arms around me. I use her arms as shelter not caring who’s watching as I try to synchronize my breathing to her heart as I have done so every time she’s found me having a panic attack. Once my breathing has settled, I pull away from Kelley to look at my left leg, making sure it’s indeed still there. I feel Alex’s worried, wounded eyes on me as I lay back down on the cement ground where Ash and I fell asleep. 

“Lets get some coffee brewing, shall we” Hope interrupts the silence, giving me space. I hear a variety of footsteps, ultimately letting me know that everyone saw me have a nightmare. 

“Kelley” I sigh

“Yeah”

“Everyone saw” 

“As we were walking in…yeah. We came to visit Jeri” Kelley answers. I cover my face in embarrassment. 

“Will you two give us a minute” I hear captain Rampone order rather than ask Alex and Kelley. Once their footsteps are out of range, I sit up and stare at Rampone who has her arms crossed. 

“Wanna tell me what just happened”  

“I had a nightmare” I answer unsure if I should tell her the truth or not. 

“Oh no, that was as clear as water and I’m sorry that you’re having them. I understand that they are apart of your…head injury…what I don’t understand is why you let Kelley comfort you and not Alex. Is there…something going on that I should know of” Rampone asks in all seriousness. 

“I, what, if you’re implying an affair between the squirrel and I…you are not as good as reading situations as I thought you were” I reply both sickened and disappointed in her inference of the situation. 

“Oh good, glad to hear that” She smiles as she offers her hand. I take in and let her pull me up. As I rise, she pulls me close “Control it Heath, or I will” She whispers into my ear before backing off like nothing happened. No one happens to notice her small threat as she leaves to greet everyone by the small kitchen area they set up. _Nobody except Alex that is._

“Alex I can explain” I begin as she walks up to me, hurt evident in her eyes. 

“How long has it been happening” 

“I, no, Kelley and I, we, it’s- theres nothing going on between Kel and I”

“What” Alex interrupts me confused “I know theres nothing going on between you two. I’m taking about the nightmares…is that why you leave my room every night and why you’re always going on runs at the crack of dawn” She asks worried more than upset now. _Oh god I thought…she doesn’t know. Thats good right? I should be happy that only Kelley and Rampone know about my panic attacks, right?_

“Basically” I lie “I’m sorry” … _For lying to you but you can’t know._

“I know you are” Alex sadly smiles. I wrap my arms around her and inhale her sweet scent. 

“I’m going to go check on Jeri and Alice”

“Actually, Ash and Jeri are getting examined by Becky. They should be gone for another thirty minutes…and Carli took Alice on a tour of the place” 

“She did” I ask surprised as I pull away from Alex a little. 

“Yeah, thats a good sign right”

“Yes” I breath a little happy that Carli’s taking a big step in the process of mourning her child “Very good indeed” 

* * *

“This is where you worked, I mean not here right here but at Citadel” Alice beams at me as I walk with her, hand in hand, across the parking lot. 

“Yeah, it is” I reply with a sad smile.  

“It’s so big” She replies with  big eyes, emphasizing the size. 

“It is” I chuckle at her enthusiasm “Did Carli show you everything” 

“Only what she thought you and mommy would be okay with…she didn’t show me a few places…like that place” I follow Alice’s finger that points four streets down, straight at Head quarters. _Oh that place._

“Head quarters…” I breathe to myself as I stare at it from afar. 

“Yeah that place, she got a little bit sad about it when I asked what it was. Did you work there” 

“We did, in sorts”

“Oh” Alice grows quiet, understanding that we’re still hurting “It’s okay, you guys never have to go in there again, and if you do, I can go with you, to protect you” Alice offers a soft smile while squeezing my hand. I smile back at her and continue to lead the way. 

“Momma” 

“Yes Alice” 

“Did you ever meet my dad” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t my dear”

“My parents were in love, right” 

“From the pictures I’ve seen and the stories your mom told me, yes” I reply “They were in love” 

“Are you and Jeri in love too” Alice asks as we arrive at the waiting cars. My heart falls as I see Alex, Kelley and the rest of those heading home walking out of the building. 

“Ready to go babygirl” Ash asks as she wobbles her way over to Alice to say goodbye. 

“Not really” She pouts as she clings onto Ash’s leg. 

“You’re going to make me cry” Ash tears up as I lift Alice up to kiss Ash’s cheek “You be good with momma and Auntie Lex okay? And tell Momma to teach you how to ride a bike already” 

“If I had a bike” I sigh

“Oh but what’s this” Jeri’s voice causes everyone to turn. Alice hops out of my hands and runs towards the entrance of the building where Jeri stands beside Carli and a small black bike for Alice. I’m both wrecked and happily surprised that Jeri was able to come out to say goodbye to Alice before she headed back to the safe house. Everyone watches as Carli helps Alice up onto the bike and Jeri snaps a picture. 

“Why didn’t I see this coming” I smile at Ash 

“We had a small break in a nice town about three weeks ago and you know Jeri, she loves to explore” Ash explains causing me to playfully roll my eyes knowing that Jeri would do such thing “So she forced us and the agents to wonder the city. We came across a small shop…nothing nancy, everything is used but we both liked the bike so we got it” 

“What’d you guys trade in”

“Well we didn’t have money…so I traded a pair of shades and Jeri a necklace”

“For a bike” I half scream. 

“Hey, that little girl has no price” I shake my head at Ash but nonetheless thank her, knowing that Jeri and Ash must’ve missed Alice a whole lot. Carli brings the bike and Alice down to the waiting cars. I help my little girl in and kiss her head goodbye. Becky, Hope, Theo, Syd and I watch the cars filled with our friends leave Citadel besides Ash and Carli. 

“So…is there any particular reason why you guys aren’t leaving with them” Ash asks as she turns to look at us. 

“They’re helping me design a ring for Kelley” Hope is the first to come up with an excuse. 

“You’re finally proposing” Ash beams with surprise causing Hope to frown. 

“Why the finally”

“Oh shut it, thats awesome dude, congrats” Ash beams as she congratulates Hope. I glance at Carli whom sports a proud grin. _Leave it to Hope to come up with such a fast excuse._

“So, Becky…is probably the one helping pick our materials, Syd is all about style, Theo…the one to make it and Tobin…how does she fit in” Ash ponders out loud

“She’s close to Kelley, knows what she’ll want” Hope remarks and I nod right. _Yeah right, I can’t even help Kelley pick out your ring._

“Oh right, almost forgot about that”

“Well, not that this isn’t a big moment for you Hope but we need to steal Ash as she and Jeri have a meeting with the world leaders soon” 

“Right right, well, I’ll meet up with you guys soon” Hope smiles before walking alongside Carli and Ash back inside. We wait until the coast is clear to disappear to a sector of the city Carli has reserved for us. 

Once we reach the rustic old metal door, I reach into the dumpster nearby and grab a small pair of metal clippers Carli left for me. 

“What, she couldn’t even get us a key” Theo rolls his eyes as I cut the chain on the door. 

“Relax, she has enough on her plate as is” I reply as I toss him the clippers and begin to open the door. It takes a few shoves to get it to bust open but soon enough we enter the dusty old place.

“Ash would kill to get to spend a day here” Becky breathes as we enter what used to be the old junk yard of Citadel. Where all defective gear and scrap metals and trashed vehicles of the forces and battle fields was sent.

“She would” I whisper as I walk over to the metal wall and flip the cover of the light switch open “Hey Theo…a little help” I yell behind my shoulder seeing that the light switch is busted. He rushes over and frowns.

“We’re going to need another one” He breathes as he pops the case off and begins to work the wires until the old rustic and dusty place comes to life. The lights are old, and when they turn on, you hear the bulbs light up. 

“Would you take a look at that” Syd softly grins as we check out the giant warehouse that will become our base. 

“If I wasn’t so young, I’d say this is original” Theo remarks as he brushes by me to check out the trash he deams as treasure. We spend a couple of minutes looking around, picking at the scraps and junk lying around the old place until theres a knock at the door. Immediately Theo gets into position causing me to roll my eyes. 

“Man you really need to loosen up” I point out as I walk to the door and open it. 

“I was beginning to think you gave me the wrong direction” Rampone greets me as she and the rest of the squad come in. 

“What? Scared of the unknown” I joke as I close the door behind Pinoe who’s the last one to come in. 

“Would you look at this place…absolutely outstanding” Christen breathes as I place my elbow on her shoulder. 

“More like an absolute junk I’d say” Tim states 

“Alright ladies and gentlemen, that’s enough. You’re going to have to get used to this place whether you like it or not. This is our new base” I inform causing a few of the boys to groan “The safe house…was designed to be both a house and a command station…but it was never designed to be for more than two purposes; therefore, we are here” 

“So Scout, what are our orders” Christen speaks up

“We’ve had a busy few weeks…with Jeri being shot and Ash being injured…it’s clear that we are facing something that very up to date on equipment and tactics so, after a long chat with Carli and the world leaders we can to the conclusion that our best shot of beating these fuckers is to repay a visit to the past. And what better place to learn from mistakes then here, the junk yard of Citadel. Look around, find things, innovate them, improve and learn from the errors” I finish. Everyone does as told and scatters around the warehouse. Jumping into the piles and bins of junk, digging for treasures lost amounts the things Citadel deemed as trash. 

“Hey, Hey Scout, I think you should come check this out” Rimando hollers at me as I scope a pill of metals with Rampone. 

“What is it” 

“I think its better if you take a look at it” He replies. I take a look at Rampone who shrugs and follows as we let Rimando takes us to whatever he’s found. As we approach a half dug through pile of scraps, I see everyone has gathered around. The squad splits in two, allowing Rampone and I through. As soon as I lay eyes on it, my lips quiver upward. 

“My bike” I breath as I stare at it all beat “I…wow I thought they had already dismantled it” 

“That’s not all” Tim smiles as he uncovers a metal scrap from the old Athena hover craft. I turn expecting to see Ash but again am reminded that she is no longer under my command. Instead, my eyes meet Hope’s who’s just walking in through the doors. 

“Let’s keep searching” I softly smile before putting my attention into my old squad bike.

* * *

“You’re one hard women to get ahold of” Carli says as she knocks on the frame of my new office. 

“Sorry, I’ve been completely lost in this” I beam s I move aside for Carli to see my old bike. Her facial expression is complete shock then happiness as she runs her hand over the wheel. 

“Wow, who would’ve known” 

“Right” I remark as I grab an old cloth to clean my oily hands. 

“Do you think it’ll run again”

“No promises without Ash” 

“You miss her” Carli states as she leans on a work bench. I stop running the cloth on my hands and sigh. 

“You know, these new squads. They are good, great even…but they’re not us” I respond as I look through the wrinkly yellow blinds that that look towards the warehouse, where the squads share what they’ve found with each other. 

“That’s the beauty of it though…to rebuild something, better it” Carli remarks as she puts it into analogy of my broken bike. 

“It’s going to be a lot of work, hard work” I reply as I continue to watch everyone sitting around the scraps, all very enthusiastic about the things they found. 

“Nothing you haven’t already done”

“Yeah, well I never anticipated having a hot head and an axiom born on my squadron” I state causing Carli to laugh. 

“Give them time, you’ll break them in, you broke us in” 

“Yeah, I just hope that happens before Theo shoots someone and before Hope gets shot” I joke causing Carli to continue to laugh. 

“How’s she holding up” Carli asks, switching from the relaxed demeanor to complete seriousness. 

“She’s following orders”

“But”

“But I need her to overcome her past” I whisper knowing it’s a touchy subject all around. The past is the past but I know Carli was one of the people Hope leaned on when her brother passed away so I do as much as I can to be respectful of the situation. _No matter how bad things got, Carli still cares about Hope and Carli is my friend, therefore, Hope is my friend too._

“I, ugh, so you know…about her brother” Carli cringes as her sight shifts to the ground, her voice timid and sad. 

“Yes” I sigh knowing Carli is trying her best not to show emotion. I watch Carli open and close her mouth  serval time, trying to form words to say that I should be as gentle as possible when the time comes and I have to break Hope “It’s okay Carls, it’s okay. She’s safe in my hands” I whisper as I place a hand on Carli’s shoulder. She nods yes, knowing that if I broke her in a humane way, I will do the same with Hope. 

“Just, ugh, when it happens, make sure no one other than you is around…when she’s mad or upset she tends to let things out. It’s not always pretty but it’s her way of cooping” Carli clears her voice “I came to tell you Jeri and Ash are leaving in an hour” 

“So soon” 

“Jeri convinced the world leaders that it was a necessity to get back and finish clearing the city they were in” 

“Well…I guess I’ll go say bye” 

“I’ll come with” 

I leave the squads to tinker with their findings as I follow Carli back to the medical building. As I arrive to the level were they are located I halt Carli. 

“I need you to put this one Ash’s suit” I whisper as we exit the elevator. I slip the newest and smallest tracer into Carli’s hand and walk away. Walking towards Jeri’s area, I remind myself that it is essential that she stays alive but also essential that she leave. 

“May I come in” I ask as I stand outside the closed off area. 

“Just in time, can you help” Jeri asks as I step inside. Walking over to her, I take the opportunity to place the tracker on her suit as I zip up her suit, running my fingers over the bandages that cover her healing gun wound.  “Are you sure your ready to go back” I ask as I stand by and allow her to finish getting ready. 

“Life doesn’t wait for us to be ready” Jeri replies sadly. I nod in agreement and stare at the ground. _It doesn’t wait for us because time is a man made tool, life is spontaneous, made to move towards disorder._

“Plus, the sooner I get out there, the sooner we find Ali and the sooner we get to come back” 

“Jer” I interrupt causing her to stop packing 

“Yes Tobs” 

“Be safe” I whisper instead of a goodbye. She takes a moment to close her eyes before walking over to me. We embrace each other tight as I feel my body settle into the small peace before Ash comes barging in. 

“Jeri are you-oh, I’ll wait outside”

“It’s okay, you can stay” I stop Ash before she leaves. She avoids my gaze as she walks over to the chair in the corner. 

“Is the craft ready”

“Yes” Ash answers Jeri

“And the agents”

“Aboard and ready” 

“And your medicines, are they packed” I ask 

“Becky made sure to do that while we got cleared out” Ash replies and I nod. 

“Well then…I guess its time. Ash can you grab”

“I got it” I interrupt Jeri as I bend down to pick Jeri’s bags. Ash stares at me as Jeri exits “I’m just helping…you’re still hurt” 

“I wasn’t asking” Ash states “But while you are at it, can you carry my things too” I roll my eyes at Ash who giggles as she exits the room. I use the few seconds I have along with Jeri’s things to slip a picture I took of her and Alice sound asleep and slip it into her bag. 

“You coming” Jeri pokes her head in

“Right behind you” I smile as I pick up her things and follow her out to the hover craft. Her men take her things and move them to her quarter as Jeri and Ash walk over to the command station. I stand by the side door, watching how they work together to establish a game plan for their return. 

“That’s a good plan, I’ll go tell Carli we’re ready for take off” Jeri replies as she squeezes Ash’s shoulder proudly and leaves the command station to inform the world leaders that they’re ready. 

“You guys work well together” I point out as I circle the command table. 

“Yeah, I guess we do” Ash replies as she looks up to meet my sight. 

“Ash, listen”

“I know Tobin, I will protect her” 

“I know you will, but thats not what I was going to say” 

“Then”

“Be safe out there, okay?…And never, ever, underestimate them” I whisper as I look around making sure no one heard. 

“Is there something you know” Ash asks as she furrow her brows at me and inches close. 

“I know that you put yourself in danger and that you won’t always have Jeri besides you…so you listen carefully. You take care of yourself, you clear those towns, you find your girl and keep your tail away from the fire. I’m serious Ash” 

“I know Tobin you don’t have to remind me”

“Yes I have to remind you, I’m not burying no more caresses you hear me? No more” I see Jeri in the corner of my eye and pull away. 

“We’re ready for take off” Jeri breathes a little excited 

“Well, I’ll leave you guys to it” I force a smile before heading to the side door. Ash and Jeri’s eyes follow me as I hop off the hover craft and jog towards Carli. The propellers of the hover craft drown out our voice as we start to chat about our plans. 

“Is it working” I ask Hope through my hidden ear piece as I turn around to watch the hover craft take off

“Jeri is at the command station and…Ash is at her locker…her vitals are up” Hope informs me

“She’s looking for something” I grin knowing Ash and her ability to sense things

“You think she knows”

“Oh she does” I turn to Carli “And by that I mean she knows about Alex and I…about the protocol…she’s clueless. She would’ve dug up evidence while here” 

“Good, so whats next” Carli yells over the loud noise. 

“We train” I whisper as the hover craft takes off. 

* * *

“NO NO NO, AGAIN” I bark at the squads as we go into the four hour of training. 

“Tobin…what is” 

“Did I stutter” 

“No Scout” Hope sighs as she positions herself, ready to charge at Allie. 

We continue repeating the same movement until Rampone finally connects her fist with my jaw. I spit blood onto the mat, tasting the iron in my blood as it leaves my mouth. Wiping my mouth clean, I raise up from the ground. 

“That’s enough for the day, rest up, we have that morning run” I instruct. No one groans out loud out of fear that I’ll make them do more. I grab my bag that lays on the grass nearby and toss it in the back of Christen’s car. 

“You’re running home” Christen asks without much surprise. 

“Yep, see you there” I wave as I begin the four mile run home feeling my muscles tighten every step on the way. 

* * *

 

**Becky’s POV (Same day)**

“She’s doing it again” Christen sighs with sadness as I approach her car, tired and sore. 

“Is it a surprise” I breath as I toss my duffle back into the bag of the car and sit on the grass. 

“No, but don’t you think we should be doing something about it. I mean, have you seen her lately…either she’s drowning herself in work load, training or spending all her given time with Alice. I’m starting to feel kind of bad for Alex” 

“She signed up for it” Allie joins the conversation, taking a seat on the ground and leaning against Christen’s car. 

“What do you mean…isn’t Alex your best friend too” Christen asks Allie

“Don’t get me wrong, I feel for Lex, but we all knew signing up for this meant Tobin falling into old habits. It shouldn’t be a surprise, even more so to Alex, she should have known Tobin would fall into this state” Allie explains

“Does she know Tobin though…I mean think about it, none of us knew Tobin during the war and we sure as hell don’t know her now” Hope inquires as she huffs, taking a seat besides Allie. 

“Hope, not to be rude, but you’re forgetting that Tobin’s our commander, our Scout, has been since we were kids. So I hate to brake it to you, if anyone doesn’t know Tobin well, it’s you” I lay it out for her

“Look, I wasn’t trying to start anything but I was just wondering…don’t you think something else is going on” Christen interrupts the tension

“Well I’m justing going to point out that your girl knows something we don’t” Allie shoots at Hope

“My girl? What does Kelley have to do with any of this” 

“Don’t play Hope, Tobin would never pick Kelley over Alex on any given day so what’s the” 

“I’m sorry is this the little gossip squad where we gather to express nonsense concerns and rumors about the commander” Rampone interrupts Syd whom was just joining the circle. Everyone remains silent as she looks at everyone with a stern glare “Get your asses moving then” she hustles everyone into the cars. I glance at Hope who seems to be annoyed but rather silent as she gets into the car. 

“Everything okay” I ask as I buckle in next to her. 

“Fine” 

“If you say so Bud” I sigh as I lean my head against the window and gaze at the hills in the distance. Tobin’s had the squads training for long hours at high intensities. After a secret meeting of the squads in which Tobin, Captain and Tim were absent, we all came to the conclusion that we were tired. Hampering with some results, I convinced Tobin that intervals would be a better approach as our bodies adjust…as I stare at everyone tired now, I realize maybe intervals haven’t been much easier. 

“I don’t think I can last another day” Syd breathes as she readjusts in the passengers seat. 

“I second that” Hope murmurs 

“We don’t have a choice” Christen sadly smiles as she stops at a red light “Becks” 

“Huh” I reply as I turn my head away from the children on the street playing with rocks, running amongst ruins as if they were just that. 

“How much long do you think training will be this intense” 

“I don’t know…do you guys see that” I breathe uninterested in their conversation and more interested in the kids who continue to play whatever they’re playing. 

“The kids” Hope asks confused

“Yeah” I breathe as a little girl dodges a boy and avoids being tagged 

“They’re cute” Christen smiles before continuing our drive home. I watch the kids run around free until their bodies are just a memory. Once we arrive home, we all wobble inside. 

“And Tobin” Alex asks as she sticks her head out of the garage door to look for her. 

“She’s running here”

“AGAIN” Alex half yells a little too loud causing everyone to turn and give her a side glance. 

“Where’s the mini me” I ask for Alice

“On the phone with her momma” Alex sighs as she helps me carry Tobin’s things to her office. 

“So, Jeri finally got some time off”

“I guess so” Alex replies without much enthusiasm. _Is that what I think it is?_

“You don’t sound so thrilled about that” I point out as I set Tobin’s duffle bag on Tobin’s chair. 

“No, no, I am” 

“But”

“There’s no”

“You know you can lie to everyone…except Tobin and I. We can read your vitals you know” Alex sighs realizing I’m not going to take accept her bullshit answer. She huffs as she takes a seat on the mini black leather couch and looks at her hands with some confusion. 

“I just, I’m happy, for Jeri to have some time with Alice. Like really I am, Alice misses her mommy more than I miss going to get my nails done but the point is, sometimes I feel like I’m not appreciated”

“I’m sorry, I’m following but I’m not. So when Jeri and Alice spend time together, you feel blown off or is there something else”

“Yes” Alex responds unsure herself. 

“Continue”

“The more time Alice spends with Jeri, the more she anticipates her return” 

“Oh, now I see…you think Alice is building false hopes because the more she spends time with Jeri, the more she’ll want Jeri and Tobin to be together once she gets back” I ask for clarification. Alex nods her head yes and I begin to feel a little uncomfortable, understanding but uncomfortable. _I don’t know whether to think that is plain selfish or sad_ “Have you tried talking to Tobin about this”

“No” 

“Well, I don’t know I’m much of help but I do understand where you’re coming from. You and Tobin have been together for…”

“Theres no official date or anything”

“Okayyyy…um, look, I don’t want to be a jerk any less hurt your feels more than they already are but I think you should give it time. It sucks, I can tell and trust me some of the girls have noticed but I really don’t think you have to worry about the possibility of Tobin and Jer being together. I mean Tobin basically threw herself off a building for you”

“That she did” Alex softly smiles with an eye roll with how stupid Tobin was to do that

“So just wait. Give it time. Tobin is just scared. Alice has been through enough already but trust me when I say it, she loves you. With all her heart. And when the day comes that you and Tobin decide to tell her about you guys, I know she’ll be okay with it. As of now, I can’t really tell you why Tobin’s waiting but I think Tobin wants her to have some image on parenthood. You know how Jeri and Tobin are with her, always trying to teach her life lessons and such” 

“Thanks Becky” 

“No problem” I offer her a small smile before leaving Tobin’s office and heading to my lab. 

“How are you not exhausted” I ask myself as I lock the door and head over to my work bench. _Maybe because I’m the only one who follows the vitamins, minerals, fluids and regime word by word._ Shaking my head, I bring up the results from the 14th test I’ve ran on the elements I’ve found on the sticky notes we recovered from the warehouse weeks ago. _How many more of this tests will I run until I’m convinced its true._ I ask myself as I sigh and toss the results into a folder and set a machine to run again. 

A knock on the door has me scurrying to hide the folder before I walk over to open the door. 

* * *

 

**Ash’s POV**

“Hey Icy, wheres Momma” 

“She’s working” Alice answers as she shows me the care packages she helps Christen assemble. 

“Oh”

“She works a lot” 

“Does she” I ask a little saddened to hear that Tobin’s not giving my god daughter the appropriate time of the day. 

“She’s working or training” 

“Training, of what kind” 

“Running or with some of the gals” 

“Oh, nothing out of the normal then”

“Nope” Alice responds as she tosses the final packs of bandaids into the recycled bags. 

“I’m back” Jeri squeals as she scoots me over and sits in front of the screen. 

“Look Mommy, I already have 32 done” Alice beams 

“Only 123 to go” Christen giggles as she comes into the picture “Hey Jer, Hey Ash” She waves as she helps Alice open a new box of supplies

“Hey Chris, how are you” Jeri smiles

“Tired, but good, always good” 

“Tired” I ask 

“Yeah, hauling these boxes ain’t so easy” Chris laughs “Wish you were here to help” 

“We’ll be done with this city in about two weeks. Then we’re taking a week to explore and search for this girls babe, then we’ll head home by the end of the month” Jeri explains 

“Oh wow, okay, awesome, just in time for the opening of new houses that Alex and I have been working on”

“Exactly” Jeri beams 

“So, Chris, what’s everyone been up to” I ask 

“Oh you know, work and lots of questioning, lots of arguments and stuff. The usual with the world leaders” 

“Who’s all moved out” 

“Basically everyone, except Allie, Jose, Hope and Kelley, although they’re both planning on proposing so we’ll see how that goes, and”

“Wait, they’re both planning on proposing” Jeri begins to laugh 

“Yeah, it’s a big mess. Kelley came to Tobin first, then Hope grabbed a few of us and yeah”

“And no ones going to tell them that the other one is planning on doing it” 

“Nope, we all just want it to happen already” Christen replies over her shoulder as she begins filling the bags that Alice has finished up with small notes that tell the individual receiving the care package whats inside. 

“So its Tobin’s best friend, the couple, you and Alex” 

“Yeah…wait, yeah, I think that’s all. Syd moved in with her boy and Kristie is with her sister, so yeah thats all that’s left here at the safe house. Amy brings Ryan over regularly to play with Alice but that doesn’t really count” 

“Awe hows Amy, Ryan and her newborn” Jeri’s eyes light up as she talks about the kids. I excuse myself from the live stream and head to my bunker. 

“Agent Harris, I know you’re off duty but I think theres something you should see” An agent from the command room finds me as I’m about to open my bedroom door. I sigh and nod okay. 

“Agent Harris is here” He informs the command team as I enter the room. They all salute me before getting back to work “Over here…this is some footage that was leaked…dark agents we believe” 

“Where are they” I mummer under my breath as I get closer to the screen to get a better look. 

“These were from a city 17 miles away…two days ago” 

“TWO DAYS” I ask bewildered 

“It was just now recovered Ms. Harris”

“Wait…that, that, can you zoom into that” I point at the screen. The man orders his team to do their best work and suddenly, as the men work to clear out the footage, I see what I believe is a tactic I know. _It can’t be…no._

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

My lungs exhale the anger that pools in my heart as I see the safe house just half a mile away. I stop on the side of the road and stare at it. Stare at once was a small one shack where I grew up with Sophia and James. 

“It’s not home without you guys” I whisper before continuing my run to the house. As my eyes scan over Alex sitting in front of the house with her cat in her lap and her fancy hologram tablet, I feel a little bad. Her cat alerts her of my presence as I stare down at her. 

“Hey” I breath as she looks up

“Hi” 

“Whatcha looking at” I ask as I sit down besides her and rest my head on her shoulder. 

“Just the final touches of the project” 

“The actual building begins tomorrow right” 

“Yep”

“Whats wrong” I ask, sensing her distortion a mile away

“Nothing, nothing, you, aren’t you tired” She asks as she grabs my chin and looks me in the eyes. 

“I’m okay, just needed a small run…but you know, as beautiful as your eyes are, I can tell somethings wrong. Is everything okay? Is Alice okay? Did something happen to Jeri and Ash? Is anyone hurt, oh my” I ask as my thoughts slowly get darker and darker as I try to decipher what has Alex so knocked up. 

“No, no, Tobin, baby relax” Alex worried voice interrupts me as she places her arms on my shoulders as I shake slightly “Tobin, you’re shaking… are YOU okay” 

“Fine, I haven’t eaten at all, maybe that’s why” I half lie as I begin to stand up but Alex grabs my arm and stops me. 

“Tobin”

“Alex, really baby, I’m fine” 

“Okay” Alex breathes as she drops my hand. I quickly leave her at the door as I rush to the safety of my shower. The water turns my body into a plumb as I stand there for more than an hour, just feeling a source of coldness upon my burning skin. 

“Stupid diamond” I curse as it begins to pain as it has been for the last two weeks. Walking out of the shower, I open a secret compartment and pop a vaccine out. As I inject it into my blood, the pain of my diamond eases away. I dispose of the needle safely and hide the medicine. I change into fresh clothes and open the door that leads to my room. A tray of healthy foods lies on my bed and I sadly smile at Alex’s gesture. 

“Tobin” Allie’s voice asks from outside my room

“Come in” I breathe as I take a seat on my bed and stare at the tray of food. Allie shuts the door behind her and walks over to the other side of my bed. She lays across the bed, placing her head in my lap as I lean my back into the backboard of my bed. 

“All your rooms, they’ve all been very dark” She points out as she looks around my bedroom which only natural light coming in from the cracks beneath the glass wall curtains. 

“Yeah” I whisper as I run my hands through her hair 

“Tobin”

“Yeah” 

“I know the worlds changed and that things might never be the same…but we’re still a team right. You and me? We’re still a team right” Allie asks. The tone of her voice is weak, afraid and just above a whisper. 

“What makes you think we’re not” I ask softly 

“Nothing, nothing, I just had a nightmare…I don’t know, it wasn’t like horror but just, realistic” 

“Do you want to share it” 

“It will sound pathetic” 

“Really now? You’re telling, the girl who has nightmares, visions and episodes and writes in a journal for therapy that a nightmare is pathetic” Allie takes a moment before giggling. 

“Okay maybe not” 

“I just, we were on a mission, or you were, I was here watching with the world leaders and the rest of the squad. And I’m not really sure what happened because all our communications went down but we found a line, but there wasn’t sound, just live footage. You were with one of them, a dark agent, we couldn’t hear what you were saying but he had Alex. Then they somehow infiltrated us and had us too. You had to choose. Alex or us…it’s dumb really” 

“Infiltrated…the safe house” I ask swallowing the new worries the form based on her nightmare. _I have to make sure to amp the security and systems._

“Yeah I don’t know. It would be an impossible scenario really, the safe house is the safest place besides Citadel and Alex is here so…” 

“Yeah…she is” I reply as I begin to think of how unsafe Alice and Alex are outside of the safe house perimeters. 

“It was dumb, I told you so” Allie sighs 

“Hey now…at least a faceless man doesn’t haunt you” 

“That is true” She half smiles. We spend the rest of the evening watching movies we come across on the tv before Allie falls fast asleep. I sneak out from underneath her and head to the gym of the house. 

I flick the lights on and the blacked out gym comes to life. I close the door behind me and walk over to a bin to grab some prewrap and tape. After I finish wrapping my hands, I sit on the floor and stare at myself in the mirror.

“What’s happening to you” I ask my reflection, somewhat hoping it would answer “Why do I feel so weak…why do I feel like theres something waiting for me. Why…WHY” I yell at the mirror as I grab a nearby weight off the floor and throw it at the mirror. 

I stare at the shattered glass on the floor before sighing and walking over to the punching bag. My intensity and strength fuel as every punch gets sharper. I beat all of my anger into the bag, numb to my bruised knuckles that kiss the hard spots over and over again. With a finally dap into the small metallic side of the punching bag, my knees give out and I kneel on the ground in complete ache. The vision takes over as the gym door opens and I'm shaking. 

"I have, I have to, I, protect, more" I ramble as the horrifying images of my friends getting killed play in my head. 

"Breathe with me, listen to my voice" Alex tries to find me as I'm lost in the bloody images. The episode lasts a few more seconds until the images slowly blur to Alex's begging eyes. She's crying and clings onto me as she see I'm finally conscious. 

"I'm okay" I breathe more to convince myself rather than to assure Alex "I just, have to work harder" 

"No! No! You already made you hands bleed" Alex yells at me unintentionally as she raises my hands for me to see 

"I, I have to train Al" I whisper a little groggy as I begin to move. 

“Then train with me, use me, let me in Tobin, please” Alex begs as she wipes her tears away. I stare at her and swallow hard. I run my thump under her eyes carefully, clearing the salty path and taking her lips in mine. The gentle kiss last seconds as I pull away and whisper okay. 

* * *

 

It’s been a week of training with Alex. While it’s not intense, it is soothing. She puts up a fight which is nice and it helps to ease some nerves as her tactical intelligence rises each session. As she showers, I lean against the wall on her window seat. I look outside to the dying grass and think how lovely fall is. _How breathtaking is it that nature tries to teach us that death…isn’t always ugly, it doesn’t have to be painful, sometimes death can also be beautiful._

“Tobin” A small whisper and knock force my eyes away as I glance at the door. 

“Yes” 

“We have a situation” Hope whispers unsure if Alex can hear us over the shower or not. I nod for her to leave and take my time leaving Alex’s room. As I walk down to the elevator, I stare at my socks that are crisp white. Pushing the down button, the door open and I pop inside. The doors close and down I go. Agents move about the commanding floor as I walk through the sea of them in ease. Walking in front of the commanding desk, everyone freezes. 

“Show me the video” I order as I hold my hands behind my back. 

“We recovered this video not too long ago, about two days old” Carli informs me “Thanks to Hope it was possible to sneak it out of the ground commanders system without notice…it’s a level red” 

“Everyone clear the room, except for my selected four, Carli and Rampone” I order 

“What, no” Pinoe is the first to object

“Come on Pinoe, don’t make this hard” Christen mutters as she pulls Pinoe away. Carli ensures that the doors are locked before signaling Hope to play the video. It doesn’t take long before I pause the video and rewind it. My eyes stoned on the dark agent slitting a man’s throat. I swallow hard before pausing the image on the agents covered head. 

“Carli” I ask as I place my hands on the command table, looking straight forward at the screen. 

“I’m sure” 

“Syd” I breath as I pray that she confirms otherwise. 

“I…it’s hard to tell by the video and the head covering…but, but it could be” She whispers. My head falls in defeat as the emotions and confusion quickly fill me. I breath out through my mouth, before bringing a hand up to my mouth in deep thought. 

“We know where those tactics are learned Tobin” Rampone points out and I nod. 

“Prepare the hover craft, we leave in one” I order as I walk down the steps of the command platform and rush outdoors. The warm fall breeze wraps my body like a blanket as I curse at the sky, begging for it to all be wrong. 

“Momma” Alice scared voice freezes me as I yell with hot tears. 

“Alice” I turn to her

“Are…are you okay” She asks as I wipe my tears 

“Yeah, just a little upset” I confess as I walk over to her and bend down to pick her up. 

“With what” 

“With…with the lord” 

“God” She asks a little confused

“Yes my dear” 

“So you’re a believer”

“I’m trying to be” I reply as I offer her a small smile

“My dad was a believer” 

“Really” I ask, a little impressed by the new detail

“Yeah, mom was too until dad passed away” 

“Yes, well, somethings are hard to get over” I whisper while I push her head into my shoulder and hold her close. 

“I want to try” Alice whispers as I walk to the door

“Try what Icy”

“To believe” She whispers as she nuzzles her head into my neck. I pause momentarily before I open the door and take her to Alex’s room. Alice lets me go without any issues as I promise to think about her request. 

“I’ll think about it okay, you stay here with Alex and make sure she doesn’t give you a hard time, okay? If she misbehaviors you call me okay” I joke 

“ME?!” Alex breaths in disbelief

“yes you, now I have to go babygirl, I’ll be back soon” I whisper before kissing my daughters forehead. I give Alex a smile before heading out the door to pack up. While the packing goes quick, my mind works slow. I’m in denial of what I saw. As though it can’t be real. _As if the world hasn’t already taught me that anything is possible._

My select four load up the truck quickly as I give the other members of the squads orders. While some are unhappy that I keep on electing the same four, others don’t mind. 

“You are to help clear out this cities” I order as I hand Christen the maps of highlighted cities “The ground commanders troops are the ones clearing it out, wear grounds agents uniforms, use the voice tuner to make your voice unrecognizable. Jeri and Ash will be out there, if she ends up in the city you clear out, make sure to stay out of her way but keep an eye on her and Ash. Use basic tactics, no squad tactics whatsoever” 

“So basically we’re just basic agents” Pinoe rolls her eyes

“If thats what you want to look at it as…I need you, Christen and Rampone to feed me updates” 

“No problem Scout” 

“Lets go” I order my select four. We jump into the truck and begin our way to Citadel. While it would be ideal to take the hover craft, we need to get their fast. 

“You ready Hope” I whisper as we walk to the deploy room. 

“Theres really no preping for it” She breathes

“Hey, just hold onto the bars, close your eyes, and remember to breathe” I offer as I stand in my cell. She gulps as she steps into her small cell. I glance at my small squad before closing my eyes and pressing the button. As I transcend to Kanatos, I bite my cheeks. It’s never been fun transcending but it is something you get used to. The head spinning, gut crushing feeling I mean. When I open my eyes, I see Syd holding a trash can for Hope as she pukes her guts out. 

“I remember when that was me” Theo breathes as he walks up to me

“It’s going to take her some time to get used to the feeling” 

“The first times always the worst” 

“I got it” Becky mutters as she walks over and injects a small medicine that restores her equilibrium. I toss Hope a water bottle and she quickly drinks it. 

“A warning would have been nice” She coughs as I pull her off the floor 

“Yea, well, we all went through that” 

“How many other firsts are there” She asks tired of being the newbie. 

“Oh boy, she doesn’t know” Theo laughs 

“Know what” Hope freezes

“It never stops, the firsts, whether it be your first bullet to your first fall, it never stops” Syd laughs. 

“Come on, we have work to do” I giggle as Hope stands still, unable to move. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter....go go go!


	3. ...For Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I kinda added the beginning of Chapter 4 to this. So Chapter 4 will be a complete different side of things. Going to get some different POV's, definitely Ash's and a couple others, then the fun begins! Yay! haha but until this, prepare to have your mind blown in this chapter hahaha 
> 
> Make sure to read the chapter notes at the end, I added a funny personal incident

…For Pain

**1pm the Next Day**

“COVER THE DOOR” I yell at Theo whose on the other side of the street as I reload my gun. To be quite frank, I’m not sure what I expected when we arrived to the city where known dark agents were located but it sure as hell wasn’t a party. 

“READY” He yells. Taking a second to look at the map, I quickly stand up in the heavy fire and run across the street, shooting one dark agent and injuring another one. As I enter the building, Theo covers the door and I quickly rush through the house. 

“Sasic, come in” 

“Here Scout, eight blocks down” 

“Is your location cleared”

“Give me a second” She pauses me. I hear her take on two agents with her signature move before replying “It is now” I roll my eyes at the woman but give her the credit she deserves. She and her select four have been very handy to us as we fight these agents. 

“Becky, Hope, get to Sasic, Syd, how’s the perimeter check” 

“Not good, they’ve called for more agents and…wait…wait wait, I got eyes, I got eyes…your.” 

“Syd…Syd, I can’t hear you very well” 

“Oh my gosh” Syd breathes 

“What is it” I demand as Theo keeps shooting out the door way 

“Get out!” Is all I hear Syd yell before our power dies. I immediately look at Theo who looks at me with the same expression. 

“We have to go…don’t use the back up power…not until its necessary” I remind him as I begin to break down the back door. Theo hurries to my side and we manage to get out before the dark agents start coming in through the front. 

As we run across the dirt street, bullets fly in every direction. It’s hard to tell who’s firing at what and if any of the shots are from our squad but what I can tell is that for once, I’ve never been so happy in my life to be shot. 

“Tobin! Tobin are you okay” Theo panics as he grabs me and pulls me into an empty alley. 

“Never been better” I laugh

“You’ve just been shot” Theo tells me as if I haven’t already noticed. 

“The bullet, it can be traced” I shrug as I take a look at my shoulder. 

“How are you not feeling pain”

“Some of the nerves in that shoulder are dead, from the spike Kanatos decided to test on me” 

“Hey now, we’re on the same team” Sasic laughs. I turn my had to see her with her squad, along with Becky and Hope. 

“You fucking would” Becky breathes as she rushes to mend to my shoulder “You seriously don’t feel it”

“Feels like a bullet is stuck in my body…yes, I can feel it” I hiss through gritted teeth. 

“Here, lets get you over” Becky calls Hope and Mittag to help. 

“Sasic, try getting in touch with Syd, I have to know what she saw” 

“On it, Mittag, stay with the Scout, Theo, you come with me” 

“You’re not my”

“Do as she says” I order the boy. He groans before following Sasic and her squad back out into the fire zone. Once they are out of sight, Becky grabs her medical kit and pulls out a needle. 

“Alright, hold her still” 

“Whoa whoa whoa, what are you doing” Hope stops Becky as she brings the needle to my neck. 

“Hope, you have much to learn” Mittag points out 

“Just hold her still” Becky orders. As the needle enters my diamond, I curse and bite my tongue. 

“FUCK…GAHH” I scream into the dirt as the needle leaves my diamond and the medicine kicks in. I heav as Becky covers my bullet wound and helps me up. I stare at Hope who is frozen solid, her eyes on the ground where I just laid. 

“Now thats a great motivational reason not to get shot” Mittag laughs

“Okay Agent Solo, lets get going. I’m fine, the pain medicine will wear off by the time we’re back and Agent Becks can remove the bullet. Now I need you to stop freezing up on me and lets get” I’m thrown back by Mittag in time as Agents start shooting down the alley we’re in. My head hits the brick wall hard causing my head to spin. As I try recovering my senses, I see that I accidentally set off a dark smoke bomb as I landed. The alley is pitch black and all I hear is shouting and gun fire. 

“Becks, Hope, Mittag” I breath into our communication line 

“Here Scout” They all reply at once 

“Turn on your clean energy, use dark mode to eliminate them” I order as I take a second to recover. 

“TOBIN, TOBIN” Syd’s communication line finally picks up. 

“Syd?! Syd? Where the hell are you” I ask as I get up and fire at an agent hiding behind a trash bin 

“Its the grounds commander, she’s headed your way!” 

“What” I pause as I order Becky, Hope and Mittag towards the back of the alley and look down at the map that tracks the trackers I put on Jeri and Ash’s suit. 

“Christen and Rampone were selected by Ash to go with them, they are at least a minute away now” _fuck fuck fuck, that’s not enough time to clear this part of the town. Jeri can’t come here…Chris and Rampone won’t be able to protect Jeri’s entire squad…_

“Shoot at them” 

“WhAT” Syd yells in disbelief

“Ash will recognize us the minute she lays eyes on our clean energy suits, you have to shoot their convoy”

“That’s against the law Tobin!” 

“We are working under the radar Syd! There is no rules or laws, this is survival now do as I say” I order before cutting the connection. 

“Take them, and get them out of here” I grab Mittag by her collar before pushing her in the direction of Hope and Becky.

“Tobin, Tobin don’t do this” Becky comes up to me as bullets clink against the bins where sheltering behind. 

“Go, you have to go Becky” 

“Come on, we have to go” Mittag pulls Becky as Hope remains silent. Her breathing is uneven and its clear as ice that she is having trouble processing my request. With a shove, Becky runs with Mittag and Hope as I cover their back. Sending a bullet through every head that dares look at them as they escape. The scene gets bloody as I unleash the anger inside and take the men down one by one, each aiming to strike me right in the heart. 

“I thought I asked for no more childs play” I look at the dark agent as he takes his last few breathes of air. 

“Ask and you shall receive” He smiles before closing his eyes for the last time. I lay his body down and tuck my elite knifes into their corresponding spots on my combat pants before a body tackles me forward. 

I’m quickly to jump to my feet and turn to see a dark agent with very sophisticated suit. _Must be of higher order._

“Waiting until I got rid of your men…kinda weak don’t you think” I ask as I ready myself for my first one on one fight “You aren’t a talker are you” He simply cracks his knuckles and I frown “It’s funner when you respond you know” Still, no reply. _Guess we have to do this the simple way._

He runs at me and I’m quick to dodge him, sending him to the ground with a simple kick to his knees. 

“Look bud, this is fun, but theres some troops on the way and I’m not sure either one of us wants to deal with so if maybe you could…just make this easier for the both, that would be great” When he doesn’t respond, I go at him. Taking full swings, using full power until he reacts. He sends me onto the street where Jeri’s men can be heard running our ways. _You son of a bitch._ I curse as I go to grab my knifes which he shoots out of my hands. 

“So you get a weapon and I don’t” I yell, feeling a like cheated. He tosses his gun to the ground and readys himself for the fight. It starts out pretty easy until he begins to use special tactics. I slam us into an abandoned car and he yells before trying to dislocate my shoulder. I elbow him in the gut but he trips me as I try to put distance between us. He’s quick to get on top of me and go for my shoulder. With success he undoes Becky’s bandages and pushes his finger and blade into the wound. I scream as the medication seems to have no use now. He takes a second as if enjoying hearing my pain to flip us over. Taking his own gun I shoot his shoulder and begin to beat my anger into him. As his helmet begins to chip, I quickly grab my elite knifes and cut the source of his power and in a swift motion remove his helmet. The moment my eyes lay on his, my knifes drop to the floor and I halt. 

“Zane” I breath in disbelief as I stare at him and he stares at me, confused “It’s me” I inform him as I clear the screen of my helmet. His eyes squint at me as if trying to…recognize me. 

“STOP RIGHT THERE” An agent from Jeri’s squad finally finds us. I continue to stare at Zane who continues to stare at me. 

“Zane” 

“Don’t move, or we’ll shoot” The agent orders as he begins to come close. 

“Zane we have to move” I whisper as I start come to my senses 

“Stop calling me Zane” 

“Put your hands up and….STOP STOP RIGHT THERE” The agent yells as I darken my helmets screen again and grab my gun. As I point it at the man, I see Christen and Rampone running with a bunch of other agents. 

“I SAID DROP THE GUN” The man yells, nervous as he must assume I’m a dark agent. I steady my gun and take a deep breath. Both Christen and Rampone raise their guns, ready to shoot Jeri’s agents if I take the first shot but I can’t. My minds in knots as I’m stuck choosing to run or save Zane all while in the back of my mind it’s clear which choice I’ve taken, I stand there trying to find the best way to get Christen and Rampone out without being discovered. Without a second thought, I shoot warning bullets in the direction of the man and flag Rampone and Christen to follow. As I turn to run, I grab Zane and pull him with me. We dodge some bullets but it’s clear that we’re still human. I jump into an alley and inspect my side thats been shot and Zane who’s heaving. _He’s been shot in the lung…twice_

“Here put this” 

“DON’T TALK” He fumes as he puts a knife to my throat. 

“Kill me” I gulp unsure if he’ll do it or not. The sound of feet prickle his skin as he looks at me in the eyes before running. 

“STOP” Rampone yells, ready to fire but I disarm her. Christen’s shocked eyes stare into mine as Zane gets away. 

“What the hell”

“You have to go, go, Sasic is at the hover craft ready…go, find Syd and go into hiding, I’ll distract Jeri’s troops” I interrupt Rampone

“But you’re”

“GO” I yell at them. They don’t stay a second longer as they book it in the same direction that Zane left in. I quickly pick up my gun and secure my knifes as I jump out into the street and fire at the ground agents. Making sure I don’t lethally injure or kill any of them, I run. I play cat and mouse with them for about three miles until the last agents give out as we reach the perimeters of the city. Hiding on the roof, I wait until they’re gone to walk to the edge of the building and climb down the latter into an alley. As soon as my feet hit solid ground, I remove my helmet unable to breathe and let my body fall back. My heart pounds against my chest as I take deep breaths and try to stop the tears threatening to show that I am in pain. I go to grab my helmet off the ground and turn to look across the street. That is when I meet her eyes. _No_ is all I can think as she stares into mine from across the street. _It’s like the world wants us to pain._ It’s useless to try to cover myself or run, so instead I stand and pick up my helmet and limp away. She doesn’t come after me and I don’t look back as we both pretend it never happened. As we both pretend we saw a ghost. 

* * *

 

**10pm (same day)**

“Tobin?! Tobin are you safe?!” Carli yells into the pay phone I was able to find. 

“Carli I need you to listen” I breath weak

“Where are you, tell me your location and we’ll”

“Order Ash and Jeri out of the city” I interrupt as I apply pressure with my hand into my bleeding side, gasping a little at the contact. 

“Tobin”

“I saw her” 

“JERI SAW YOU” Carli yells causing me to cringe

“No Carl…I saw her…I saw Ali” I whisper, wishing it wasn’t true. Wishing I wasn’t alive at this point. 

“Then why the hell do you want me”

“She’s pregnant” I interrupt her. The phone line is silent as Carli processes the information “She’s pregnant…she was across the street, our eyes met and I swear Carli…I swear we both felt it inside” I gulp “Its like she knew me…but didn’t. She wasn’t scared but she was on alert. I’m not sure if she knows who I am but I’m sure of one thing…theres already enough heart ache going around” I pause to sniff. 

“Tobin, Tobin no, now is not the”

“They have Zane Carli, and I helped him get away, I even ordered Syd to shoot at Jeri’s troops” I inform her through tears 

“That’s okay Tobin, that’s okay, you’ll be forgiven, both you and Syd” 

“No, No we can’t keep forgiving…we’re not god. We don’t get to choose who’s sins are forgiven. Protocol Evolution is supposed to be under the radar, dark, just like them…and that’s what it’s going to be…Take care of her. That’s all I ask for Carli. Take care of my girls, you run the front line with an iron fist and you make sure the front commander and Ash are safe okay? You let us do the rest” 

“Tobin” Carli begs 

“I’ll see you on the other side bud, take care, all of you. I’ll see you guys soon, I promise” I whisper before hanging up the phone and giving into the weakness. 

* * *

 

**Same Day (midnight)**

When my eyes shoot open, my body is covered sweat and bandages. My suit is half missing and a thin blanket is covering my boiling body. _Well, I’m not a captive of the dark agents at least._ I think as I begin to sit up. 

“Stop, you’re going to make your stitches bleed” I don’t need to turn my head to know it’s her voice, Ali’s. I don’t reply as I continue to sit up so I can inspect the room in which when in. My eyes widen to see where in a half torn building, _ruins._ “You don’t listen to orders much do you” She giggles as she walks around the small bed I’m in to check my vitals. I look down at the IV in my arm and glance at her “No worries, it’s not pumping anything in…it’s actually pumping out the venom of your diamond” 

“What” I whisper with a very dry voice. 

“So you speak” She smiles. I stare at her smile, the one I came to know very well. _I found if she senses my comfort around her_ “But yes, experience any random passing out, pain…” She pauses to give me a minute to answer. I nod yes and she continues “Well, I was doing some research before those dark agents came around and discovered that the diamonds…they need something. I’m not sure what it is, a medicine or solution of sorts, someone from Kardia probably knows but anyhow, without it, the diamonds actually end up killing the nervous system and damaging the individual if the poison isn’t pumped out. Any idea why the diamond creators would design a diamond to kill the host” She asks as she walks over to a sink to wash her hands. I shake my head no and she sighs. Walking back my way, she extends her hand to me. 

“I’m Alexandra Krieger, call me Ali” She smiles as I simply stare at her hand. 

“Aren’t you scared of me” I ask. She lets out a soft giggle while walking over to grab an unopened water bottle and handing it to me. I look at it suspiciously but take it, slowly. 

“Should I be? I feel as if you are more scared of me than I am of you” I nod in thought as I open the water bottle and slowly drink it, trying to not unsettle my stomach. 

“How’d you know I wasn’t one of them, the dark agents” I ask as I empty the water bottle 

“Well at first, when I first saw you… I wasn’t sure. You were on the roof and pretty ruffled up, and you were running from Kardia’s agents so it was an odd impression but then…I saw it. The moment you stepped onto the ground and took your helmet off, I knew you weren’t one of them. The pain and tiredness evident in you, not physically but mentally and emotionally, you aren’t one of them. Then when I saw your eyes, your die pained eyes, it was clear that if anyone in the world feels anymore and isn’t numb to all this, its you. The dark agents, they don’t feel. I’ve seen them, up close…” She pauses to swallow hard. My face turns to hers, reading her vitals and tone like a book. _They’ve hurt her,_ I realize. The fire inside fumes as I see her scared eyes as she thinks of the memory. **_How dare they touch her_** _._ “And your diamond…it’s unique, you served in the forces” 

“You don’t know me” I ask, both startled and completely surprised. _I mean…your region hates mine, I murdered a couple of dozen of your people on March 27 and have always slaughter your squad._

“I don’t know you, I know your image, I know the Scout the forces painted you to be…but the woman in that bed right there, I don’t know her, the Scout we all knew died as far as I know” She replies honestly. 

“I’m…I’m Tobin Heath” I reply as I extend my hand to her. 

“It’s a pleasure to meet you” She smiles as she takes my hand. 

“Earlier, you said…you studied diamonds” 

“Only after someone very close to me died” She replies sadly. _Her partner? The father of her child?_

“I’m sorry for your lose” 

“Thank you” 

“How did you encounter the dark agents…if it’s not much” 

“No no, feel free to ask, I don’t know what you are up to but whatever it is…I trust you. Why else would you take on your own troops…anyhow, I was in a hospital, I was there for a weekend medical conference…they came in and started taking doctors. I don’t know why or for what reason but yeah” 

“Doctors…hospitals…they’re targeting hospitals” I ponder to myself 

“You didn’t know” She asks surprised

“No” I reply as a question. 

“Huh” She replies “So, how are you feeling” 

“Confused” I answer. 

“How are you not feeling any of the pain…I used a very mild sedative and I wasn’t sure what medicines were safe on your diamond so you’re basically rolling on no pain medication” She asked very worried

“Theres greater pains to feel” I whisper as I look through the half torn apart wall in front of me. Ali remains silent and I don’t expect her to reply. Instead, I begin to stand and she helps me. I walk over to the edge of the torn apart apartment and look outside. Very far, on the other side of the city, you can see Jeri’s troops leaving the city. 

“They’re leaving” Ali asks confused. 

“As they should be” 

“Why” 

“Theres nothing for them here” I reply 

“And my people” 

“They’re safe” I assure her

“How do you know” 

“Because I’m here…and no one likes to run into the past” I add as I think of Zane. 

“Can I ask you something” Ali asks unsure 

“I don’t see why not, you preformed surgery on me and somehow carried me from a phone booth two miles away, all the way here without getting caught…and while I would normally slaughter any stalker of mine, I only have thanks to give you” I thank, causing Ali to giggle.

“Sorry, I just, you were hurt and as a doctor we take an oath to help anyone in need…I couldn’t let you wander around like that and who knows who you would’ve ran into” 

“Well, I thank you” 

“No problem… I just, the way you look at me, its like you know me” 

“In another world…maybe” I offer a small smile. She chuckles and looks out the window as I continue to look at her. _Ash can’t find you. Not like this._

* * *

 

**Becky’s POV (Same day, back track to 8 pm)**

“Where is she” I ask as soon as Christen and Rampone come running into the hover craft. Rampone shakes her head no and I feel it come crashing down. 

“What do you mean no?!” Theo yells at Rampone 

“You listen right now boy, Tobin made a choice, she stayed. It is not our responsibility to ask why but to follow orders. Now sit the fuck down and buckle up, we’re leaving” 

“Where to” Sasic asks 

“Follow these coordinates, everyone turn off their communications, we’re going under” Rampone orders as she turns off her suits power and sits at her locker. Everyone stares at me as if I was the second in command. And while I’m just as scared and confused as them, I do as Rampone says and kill my suits power. One by one, everyone follows. Sasic is the last to kill her power and put the hover craft into dark mode. 

“We are officially on our own” Sasic lets everyone know. The hover craft falls silent, only the propellers can be heard as we sit at our lockers, trying to fight the pain and fears pooling in our heads. It’s takes us three hours to touch base at a secret location. Theo and Hope open the hover craft doors manually and we jump out. 

“A small cabin” Mittag breathes a little disappointed Tobin didn’t have a more modern safe house in Kanatos. 

“It’s just to blend in…the hover craft should be blended in by the woods, we’re safe” Rampone yells over her shoulder as she walks to the cabin. I look at Christen who’s been the most silent of us all. 

“The woods…Tobin would pick this place for a hide out” I try but Christen only mutts yeah. 

“She loves nature” Hope reminisces

“That she does” We all walk up to the cabin and Rampone stares at the door a little confused.  

“She gives us coordinates but not a key” Dzsenifer points out with a giggle 

“Why don’t we just turn the knob” Nadine asks 

“Yeah, why not” Syd asks as she turns the knob and enters the cabin. A small hologram light causes everyone to stop. It scans all us and then a recorded voice begins to speak. 

“Welcome to safe house 104, everything you could and will need is found here, remember, no everything is as it seem” The recording stops and the hologram disappears. 

“104” Hope asks out loud

“Now we know what she did with all her money” I joke as we enter the house but no one laughs. We all roam around the small cabin that has three rooms with bunkers, a kitchen, three bathroom, a laundry room, a living room, a balcony and a path that leads who knows where. As I sit on my bed after a warm shower, I can’t help but wonder why Tobin would stay back. 

“Hey Sauerbrunn, would you mind looking at my wound” Sasic asks as she enters our bunker. 

“Not at all, sorry I haven’t done so myself” I apologize as I grab my medical kit and look at the cut on her arm. 

“It’s okay, I understand, your friend is out there somewhere, you’re worried” 

“I am” I confess as I clean away some of the dried blood and pull out a needle to numb her arm “This is going to hurt” 

“I know” Sasic giggles 

“On the count of One” Without continuing I inject the needle into her arm and she hisses but only momentarily. I remove the needle and begin to stitch up her cut.

“Do you always let people know…that it’s going to hurt” Sasic outs as I finish up. 

“Yes” I whisper as little lower than normal “I, ugh, in my head, and it’s completely stupid really, I think that if I let people know that it’s going to hurt, they’ll be prepared for it, and it won’t hurt as much” I explain “But obviously, that’s not true” 

“It that helps you…then continue to do it, we all coop with things differently” Sasic replies without judgement. I look at her and smile. 

“Call me Backy” I instruct her as I extend my hand 

“Sasic” She replies as she shakes my hand. A knock at the door causes us to turn our heads. 

“Rampone called a meeting” Syd informs us. Sasic helps me pick up and we head to the living room in small conversation. I lean against the wall as the others sit or stand. 

“I, ugh…it’s been a rough day, I wish I could give you an answer to all the questions and concerns you have but I’m in knots myself” Rampone speaks with a very unusual tone, one I’ve never heard before. Unsure, confused…lost. _It’s like…we’re stuck in an oblivion again_ I think to myself. 

“We all saw things today that we…we never expected” I step in for Christie whom takes a seat as I move to the middle “But in the end, it doesn’t matter. The world doesn’t matter right now because we’re here. In the middle of who knows where with no one but each other. Tobin chose us, all of us with the exception of Rampone and Christen but…why? I don’t know but we all have a purpose here and our mission now is to survive long enough to overcome this pain we’re all carrying. Now I don’t know any of you as much as I like to convince myself that I do, and that has to change. When we were on the elite squads, Tobin knew us, like the back of her hand, our blood was hers…but now she’s gone and now we realize that the only thing that held us together is gone. So while we wait for her to come for us, we train, we endure the pain and we discover what Tobin saw in us. We come together, and be her light because she’s counting on us now” I say with some confidence as every word leaves my mouth with ease.

“I, ugh, I don’t feel as confident as I make myself to be…Tobin’s always knew that. From the day she met me, she always took me under her wing and helped me through it. I was at my peak, all before Allie…before she died, or got sucked into that thing. I saw it unfolding, the tank aiming at the unstable missiles, I could hear Tobin’s voice telling me I could do it, so I ran, as fast as I could but I wasn’t fast enough. The tank fired as I got on top them and it all came down. The walls, Kardia, Tobin…me…it all came down that day” Syd is the first to speak with tears “I failed Tobin that day, I failed the squad. But even after all that happened, on Allie’s funeral, she welcomed me with open arms and took the self hatred and made it her own. She taught me that sometimes, we won’t be good enough but that doesn’t mean we aren’t good enough, it simply means we’re all a little imperfect, and thats what makes humanity beautiful” She breathes with a soft smile.  

“I watched my father die” Sasic confesses next “I was twelve and the murderer was from Kardia. I fueled my anger towards your region…but you guys weren’t to blame. Tobin taught me that grudges are useless, she taught me that holding a grudge is like drinking poison and expecting your energy to die” 

“I always tell people when it’s going to hurt, it’s a silly habit but…but I was never told it was going to hurt. As we grow up, no one tells us it’s going to hurt. Just like when your in the medical program for the forces…they never tell you that when you mend the wounds, as you try to remove the pain of others, you’ll pain. Tobin taught me that pain is the most powerful and bittersweet feeling a human will experience. The sooner you accept that pain is inevitable, the sooner you can overcome it” I speak up. 

“Tobin taught me that sometimes being someone means being no one. Everyone knows my name, they know my face, but they don’t know me. I gave my life to the Kardia forces but my friends are limited. Tobin was no one, and now she’s someones, the only thing is, very few are the ones who really know her” Christie speaks next. Mittag, Nadine Christen, and Dzsenifer share their stories until Theo and Hope are the last ones. 

“I…I was a tactical assault agent in the forces under Tim’s command” Theo confesses. I gasp a little as I never knew he was tactical, I knew he was an assault agent with the specialty of techs but never tactical. Not even Pinoe or Syd are tactical agents and both are equally deadly. I look around the room and see that I’m not the only one surprised “I’m sure that you all know that being tactical means being top notch, elected by a scout and holding the highest scores in the regular academy, thats all true but what Tobin knew about me, only Tim knows…I’m scared. Every single battle, I was scared, and now I’m scared shit less but Tobin…something about her made me feel safe. I’m not sure if it was her constant comments of me needing to relax or if it was just her way of always just going for things but she was teaching me that if somethings going to happen, it’s going to happen regardless of what we do” Theo speaks out. Mittag gives Theo’s should a squeeze as we’ve all been there before. _Scared shitless._

“I lost, I lost a brother” Hope whispers causing my heart to stop. Sasic bows her head in sorrow as Rampone places a hand on Hope’s shoulder for support “He was little, very little…and I blame myself for it. I thought that it was all my fault. I took him there, to the building that was being constructed…I put him in danger and for years I blamed myself, I hated my father and let the pain drive me to be who I am today. Serious, hard headed and closed off… I’ve only lost one loved one unlike some of you, unlike Tobin who has lost more loved ones that I can count on my fingers. She was teaching me that death is not the end but more than just that, she was teaching me that we are not responsible of any life other than our own. We all die, some on the outside and some on the inside” Hope whispers as she wipes away some tears. We all take a second to process each others pasts before standing up. 

“Tobin’s taught every single one of us how to be human and how to move on, now it’s our turn to teach Tobin that she can lean on us, that we are dependable, its time she learns that people need people…she can’t do this without a squad, so lets get to work, she’ll be here sooner than we expect” I breathe a little more ready then before. Everyone stands and together, we begin to build the team Tobin assembled. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, whatcha think? Crazy huh, you won't believe what you're in for :) 
> 
> Comment reactions, questions, predictions :) 
> 
> Also, funny incident...guess who has a teacher crush...this girl over here hahaha fml


	4. What Now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sporty17,
> 
> Oh wow, I don't know what to say, I'm so flattered!! And okay okay, yes, the person Zane saw is our main enemy. And to the question about Alex's dad...we will see more of him in the next two chapters. 
> 
> The time question is a very good question that is answered in this next chapter. Jeri and Alice do ask questions but if you go back a few chapters, try to find or point out what Jeri tells Alice and Press...it's a minor detail but if you catch it I think you'll be able to guess what's going to happen. 
> 
> Becky doesn't accept the lab results...because...accepting is hard but more on that soon :) And the venom question! Great question, Becky knows things Ali doesn't and vice versa. When they meet (because they will) they'll begin to solve the big puzzle. 
> 
> And the next update is now haha

What now?

I hold the phone against my ear, listening to the dead line, trying hard not to fall apart. _Ali’s…alive and pregnant. ZANE is ALIVE and with the dark agents._ I repeat to myself as everyone stares at me. 

“So?! Did she give you her location” Allie demands from across the command room as I put the phone down and stare at it.

“I, ugh, she um”

“Carli, is everything okay” Abby asks as she walks my way. 

“She’s, she’s gone under” I breathe still in disbelief of what she told me.

“What do you mean she’s gone under” Allie yells at me as Tim and Armando hold her back. 

“She, she was vague but, but her last order was to keep Alice safe, to keep _them_ safe…She’s talking about us, in this room, Jeri and Ash, she wants us safe”

“And what about Hope, shes” 

“If anyone is safe on this planet, its Hope and the rest of her select group” Tim interrupts Abby for me “She’s going to be okay” Tim reassures Allie who’s in tears. 

“You can’t assure me that” Allie refuses 

“She promised” I inform her above a whisper. Everyone pauses to let it sink in. Tobin is a woman of her words but she never promises anything. So to hear that she did such thing is, in lite, a huge sign of hope. 

“What are our orders” Kristie is the first to ask

“Abby, command Jeri and Ash out of that city…theres nothing there for us” 

“Is there something there for her” 

“I’m not sure, she didn’t say” I lie not because I don’t think they aren’t ready to hear the severity of what we’re going up against but because Tobin needs time. _She’s hurting and she needs time. The last thing she needs is for the world leaders to send in a bunch of troops._

“Okay, I’ll get the order in” Abby replies as everyone just stands around, very unsure of what to do. I leave the command room and head outside for some fresh air. It’s approximately 4am here on the other side of the world and I feel as though the darkness still lingers when as the sun rises before me. 

“Carli” Alex’s morning voice causes me to stand up from the steps and clear my face “Is everything okay” 

“Fine, just a little thrown off” I reply with very little confidence

“You don’t sound so sure” 

“Alex” Alice’s voice causes us to look to the front door. 

“Hey there babygirl, is everything okay?! Are you crying” Alex rushes to Alice

“I had a nightmare” Alice cries as Alex picks her up “Momma went missing, she was lost and hurt, all alone…momma broke” As the words leave Alice’s mouth, the nausea hits me. I feel sick to my stomach as I rush inside and make it to the toilet in time. 

“I got you” Allie whispers as grabs a towel and damps it, before giving it to me to clean. 

“She’s hurt” I tell Allie whom is probably the only person who can match what I feel right now. 

“And so are you…Carli, what did she tell you” 

“She’s hurting, she was out of breathe, I could hear it in her voice…you know how Tobin was so good at hiding everything from the look in her eyes to her tone of voice. She’s a professional at it but this…lord I wish I couldn’t believe it but science has proven to be more real than god in our world” 

“Do you think she was shot” Allie lips tremble

“Not just shot, I think she’s lost Allie. And I don’t blame her cause not even I could have come up with such a sick story line” I tell her as I repeat her words in my head. _They have Zane Carli, and I helped him get away, I even ordered Syd to shoot at Jeri’s troops._

“You’re scaring me” Allie gulps

“He’s alive” I whisper as I recall the day where we were forced to leave Zane behind to help get Tobin and Alex out of Citadel. 

“Who’s alive” 

“Zane” The look on Allie’s face describes just about what I’m feeling as it’s a mix of horror, heartbreak and confusion. 

“I, how, is he, oh my god” Allie gasps trying to comprehend what is happening. 

“That’s not all” I mutter as I stare at the bathroom floor, suddenly finding it very soothing “She found her, Tobin found Ali” 

“Whats the catch” 

“She’s pregnant” I report as I fiddle with my fingers. Allie falls silent as she lets it sink in. I bring my knees to my chest and settle into the silence. Theres a knock at the door sending us both into hurries. 

“Everything okay” Alex voice asks through the door. I glance at Allie who glances back at me with a look I know. 

“I, I wish I could keep it a secret but Alice… she’s my kid too…and they deserve to know that Tobin and the rest aren’t going to be back” Allie whispers. I close my eyes and shallow hard knowing she’s right. We open the door and Alex stares at us without her god daughter in sight. 

“We, ugh, we need to talk, everyone” I order as I walk outside of the house to take a walk. It takes everyone an hour to gather at the safe house and we reunite out by the lake, far from the agents that work with us and without the kids. 

“What is going on” Abby hisses at me as she stares at everyone who is equally confused and cold as it is only five in the morning. 

“You won’t believe it” I breathe before getting up on a rock. 

“Carli, whats going on” Amy is the first to publicly ask as she holds herself, shivering a little. Glancing at Allie, she gives me a firm nod and I exhale deeply.

“I, ugh…It comes with big pain to be the one to let everyone know that…we are on our own” I pause as I feel the tears coming “As of 3:54am this morning, we have been fully disconnected from the greatest agents known to man after a series of events lead our greatest, most honorable Scout know to man into hiding” I inform everyone. 

“No” Kelley breathes bewildered 

“I wish I could give you more but theres nothing that I could possibly say or do that could explain what is happening…All I can say now is that we have to stick together. Now more than ever we need each other. We have to man down the front line until our best bet at winning finds a way back” I gulp. As I glance at Allie, I watch her do everything she can to calm Alex down as she cries in pain, as she feels that heartbreak all over again. _The heartbreak of losing the love of her life all over again._ My eyes travel to Kelley as she screams and yells while Lauren and Jose do the best that they can to try and calm her down. Abby stands numb besides me as I search for Tobin’s eyes more than ever.

“And Alice…Jeri, what are we going to tell them” JJ asks quietly as she makes her way over to me. 

“We’re not going to tell them” Alex answers before I can open my mouth to reply. Allie stares at Alex completely shocked as am I “We’re not going to tell them anything” 

“Alex” Allie tires to grab Alex’s arm but she rips it away

“No, NO, Alice is the only thing we have, she is our anchor. She is the only sunshine any of us have and the last thing we need right now is to lose all hope. We have lost everything, all of us have lost it all at one point, and…and I’m not going to lose that girl’s smile you hear me?! Ash is not going to lose her hope on finding her true love, Jeri is not going to lose hope on coming home to a family and I’m not going to let Tobin lose everything you hear me?!” Alex cries with anger and so much emotion that the tears begin stream down the faces of everyone as they break at the sight of Alex so desperate to stay afloat “She still has us” Alex bawls “As long as she still has us, as long as one of us stays hopeful then she hasn’t lost it all okay, you hear me, Tobin isn’t lost” Alex speaks at me specifically as her lips tremble. I nod okay as I open my arms to her and hold her close as she cries. 

“We won’t tell Alice…we’ll protect our small light of hope” I breathe into her hair as I look at Allie. 

“As long as we protect her light, as long as she continues to shine, then Tobin will come back. She promised Alice that…as long as she wore Tobin’s ring, she would always come back to her” Allie remarks as she joins the embrace. Everyone begins to huddle close as we try our best to hold it together. 

No one eats, no one talks, everyone just watches Alice as the sun illuminates our darkness in the hours to come. At first, Alice is very startled by everyones extra attention but soon enough, Allie convinces her that it is because of her excellent grades in school. 

When the squad agents that were sent to clear the cities arrive, I am, along with Abby the one to deliver the news of our underground commander. The news hits Tim the hardest as he locks himself in his room for hours as Pinoe escapes to the safety of her own room as well. I stare at my plate of dinner with no appetite, unsure and bothered by the fact that for once, I cannot estimate a time of recovery for Tobin. Because how do you recover from such life events. _How do you see a ghost in live flesh? How do you see someone you know and pretend not to?_ I glance at Allie whom sits across the table and see that she too is having the same questions. We met each others eyes and share a split second of support before going back to pretending as if we don’t know why this is all happening. 

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

“You’re awfully quiet” Ali remarks as she comes into the room with some take out food. 

“Just thinking” I answer as I take the bag with a small smile. 

“That’s what you’ve been doing for the last 48 hours” 

“Theres a lot on my mind” 

“If you want me to remain silent, all you have to do is ask” 

“Tell me about you” I reply instead of asking for silence as I take my food and slowly make my way to join her at the small wooden table she has. 

“What about me” 

“I don’t know anything about you other than you’re a doctor” I half lie. Truth be told, she’s exactly like Ali (the one from the other world) when it comes to quirks and the way she does things. I haven’t found a single difference other than that she is pregnant and obviously a doctor since other Ali is a professional soccer player. But other than that, its like I’m with Ali and somehow now, more than ever, do I feel for her. Ali came into our world not knowing a thing, not understanding a thing, confused and lost…and that’s exactly how I feel, lost. _How does one settle into their bodies when even their skin feels unknown?_

“Well, um, I love to help people. I’m from Kanatos, a city that is…buried in the ruins now” She informs me sadly. 

“I’m sorry to hear that” 

“It’s okay, everyone made it out of my small hometown in time. Ugh, I studied medicine for a couple years in the heart of Kanatos and did some conferences in Kardia”

“Where at” I ask wondering how thats even possible if theres not a single trace of her in our systems. _Maybe she had a different name? But that doesn’t make sense, Ali’s maiden name is Krieger._

“Axiom” She replies as she takes a bite of the very bitter and dated thing they call food. I set mine down and try to find an angle to gather more about her past. 

“Oh…” I ponder

“Beautiful city…very, lively” She complements. The tone of her voice lets me know that it was a bit too much for her. 

“It was something” I offer with a fake smile. She picks up her napkin to clean her face before looking up to me. 

“Was” She asks a little confused. I look up to meet her sight and realize she’s actually confused. 

“How much do you know about the war” I ask as I leave my own food on the table, unable to eat any more. 

“Not to be rude or offend you of any sorts but…not a lot. We knew how hard you guys were having it, but we were having wars of our own here in my region. After, you, to be honest I don’t really know what you did. No one does except the elite members” 

“Can I ask something” I interrupt Ali “Sorry, I just, what do you know, about what happened…at the games” I ask both to see get a feel for how Kanatos has kept from its people and for my personal as I still don’t recall those memories. 

“Um, well” Ali shifts in her seat a little as she thinks back to that day “You know how big the games were, to both our regions…it was on every television and radio station. I was at work, close to the capital. I was with a patient, a young girl and she had asked me to watch with her which was fine since I had to monitor her vitals. We, ugh, no to be rude, I respect you a lot and do hold you to be one of the greatest but ugh, we were cheering on our region” Ali pauses to see if I had taken offense

“No worries, won’t hold it against you” I giggle

“Okay good, so, you were going for our Scout, and usually theres like four different camera angles to see all the action going on but the camera focused on you. You got to Sasic and you were fighting, the next thing we knew, everything went dark, police and law enforcements flooded cities. I went to my supervisors and they were ordering us not to talk to patients and answer questions. They took some of our highest paid doctors somewhere, we were all in the dark for a week until we heard that your region was at war. The first I heard of it was…” Ali pauses to swallow hard and I give her time “was when I saw a picture of you on the front news just a few days later, the headline… well, it was to announce your death…I didn’t believe it but the war started and things just kept getting leaked. Then you suddenly appeared on the front line, really, in all honestly, it’s hard for me to believe it myself that you’re sitting in front of me. Theres many conspiracies about you, people think you’re really dead and you’re just a clone, a machine in sorts. I don’t exactly buy into them, and I can assure everyone that you are in deed 100% human”

“So the rebels here, how’d the war start here” I ask, putting small mental notes to ask my detailed questions later. 

“When the news was out that you were dead and we still hadn’t seen our squads come back, everyone knew something was up. Some hackers got into Kardia’s news and we found out that you had planned to take the forces down and your entire squad was behind it. It’s vague really, everyone took sides and our our own war started” Ali explains. I stare at her completely taken aback by the very little detail and knowledge she has on the war or anything going on now “What…did happen” She asks sensing my silence as thinking. 

“I ugh, I don’t remember” I confess as I look down at my feet “I didn’t die, obviously” I point out as I brace myself to open a closed door “But I’m dead, that Tobin, the one you saw right before the televisions went out, she’d dead” Ali’s eyes stare at my frame as the tears well in my eyes “I can’t tell you what happened after the televisions wiped out because I don’t know. But I do know that somewhere between that and now, I was on a tower, must’ve been five minutes after Citadel stopped airing the games and I fell without power or a helmet to save someone, or for better, save something. So yes, yes it is true, I was the one behind the falling of the forces but your squad, Sasic, they were in it with me. That explains why they went into hiding” 

“Sasic?! You’re telling me that we, well our squad, teamed up with you to take down the forces” Ali half yells as I hiss at her to calm down, unsure who can hear us on the street. 

“Yes. Again, I can’t, I don’t remember much detail. And I know after March 27 it seemed impossible for our regions to ever get along but you’d be surprised how far people are willing to go for freedom” 

“Is that why you don’t remember anything, because you paid such high prices” Ali asks. 

“In physical terms, I don’t remember anything because I suffered a level 9 head trauma but…yes”

“Theres no level 9” Ali interrupts me

“Exactly”

“How, how are you even alive” Ali looks at me with so much horror and sadness. 

“Nothings impossible” I whisper as I fall into an episode right then and there. As his voice echos in my head, my body begins to shake. I grip onto the edge of the table trying my best to stay still but I fail miserably as I feel myself fall and reopen the stitches in my left shoulder. **_It’s your fault, you’re apart of this._** _No, no, it’s not-_ ** _It’s your fault that they are all going to die._** I watch my select four die one by one in ways no one would ever deem possible. My breathing begins to settle as he slits Becky’s throat and lets her body fall. As Becky’s lifeless body hits the floor my eyes shoot open. Scared and worried eyes stare into mine as I immediately wince. 

“Come on, lets get you to the bed” Ali whispers as she helps me up and restitches my side. We spend the rest of the evening in silence as I stare out the window and think like I have been for the last 48 hours. As she cleans up her air, I watch her, wondering how she’s survived all this time without us, without Ash. _I know that she’s her own person, that she is not identical to Ali but…but I know now that I would’ve never survived without Allie, without my squad, so how has she?_

“I just want you to know that no one would hold it against you, if they knew what you were doing now, what you did…they wouldn’t hold it against you” Ali breathes as she heads to the door. She’s referencing March 27 but I can’t bring myself to say anything other than “You yourself don’t know what I’m doing”

“I don’t need to know, with just one look in your eyes I know that everything that’s happened and what will happen will all be for one purpose, and that is the purpose of life”

She leaves me alone for the night as I stare out the half torn wall, searching the sky for a sign. Anything to give me will to continue enduring this pain inside. 

* * *

 

**Few hours later**

I wake up heaving, fighting for air as the nightmare took all the rest I got in the few hours of sleep. Ali comes running in through the door as I cry in the aftermath of my nightmare. She gentle wraps her arms around her and I let her, seeing that she is solemnly the reason I am still alive right now. 

“I’m sorry” I whisper as I calm down

“For what” 

“For this…I’m not your responsibility” 

“Tobin” She chuckles “I’m a doctor, this is what I love to do” 

“Even then, you shouldn’t be taking care of me” I reply a little cold as I’m still hurting from the nightmare. 

“Look, I know, actually no I don’t but still…this, whatever you’re going through, you can’t go through it alone. From your physical state to your metal state, you’re barely hanging on. It won’t be long before you’re tearing yourself apart. And while I’m utterly confused, I’m also sure that if it wasn’t for me…you’d be dead by now. So please, don’t continue saying that it’s my responsibility. I am a doctor, but I’m also human, and humans need each other” She finishes. I have no energy to respond so instead, I lean into her shoulder and give in to her support “We’ll figure this out, you, me and this little peanut” She says addressing her pregnancy for the first time. 

* * *

 

**Becky’s POV**

“So you’re saying…he’s alive” I ask Christen outside of the cabin as she leans on the railing of the small deck and stares into the horizon in deep wonder. 

“That’s what I’m saying” Christen mutters as she bows her head trying to convince herself this is all really happening. I lean against the deck post and close my eyes. 

“I mean, thats possible right? Carli, Syd and Ash, they saw him take down his squad but they didn’t actually see him die” 

“I don’t know, I just know what I saw and that was Zane. Christie was going to shoot but Tobin disarmed her”

“Now why would she do that” 

“Because it’s Zane, it has to be…you saw the video, those tactics…Tobin and Rampone knew it from the moment they laid eyes on the screen, those are special tactics” 

“What are you saying” I ask as I direct my full attention at Christen whom is being gloomier than ever. 

“I’m not saying anything other than…if Zane’s alive, can you imagine who else might be” Christen asks as she moves to the rocking chair. I watch her sight drop and realize she’s not in a good state. Truth be told, no one is. For the past two days we’ve been trying to set a plan, or get some momentum going but nothing seems to be working. _Maybe we’re not the team Tobin thought we were._ I immediately shake my head and disown myself for thinking in such manner. 

“I can’t imagine anything right now, everything’s so raw, so fresh and every thought I have I doubt. I doubt everything at this point…but if anything makes sense, it’s this. Us being here, every single one of us, I don’t know how to explain it but we’re right where we’re supposed to be” I breathe as I walk up to Christen and give her shoulder a squeeze “We’re going to get through this, maybe on one limb but we’re going to get through this” 

“At what cost” Christen asks, address her fear. Her green grey eyes a little darker than normal. Usually they’re vibrant, filled with life and joys but the eyes that are stare into now, resemble exactly what I feel inside. _Fear._

“At all cost” Sasic answers the question as she closes the french door that leads outside “I know thats scary, and it seems like the end…but just look at Tobin. She’s already paid the debts of everyone, the ultimate price, she’s done that and more. And she somehow still breathes”

“She’s immortal” Christen chuckles for the first time in a while

“Her spirit is” I add as I give Christen a small smile. Christen licks her lips before taking a deep breathe and taking my hand to stand up. 

“I just, I’m scared” 

“We all are, trust me, I’m never not wanted more than go never go back out there…but I think it’s clear now that nothing is impossible. We can do this, but we have to do it together” Sasic reminds us. 

“Together” Christen breathes. 

We decide to spend the rest of the evening doing the opposite of what we’re supposed to be doing. Messing around that is. After our small conversation on the deck, it became imminent that we’re still not ready, and we might never be, but if one thing makes war look less scare, it’s an army of friends. We decided to finally follow the path into the woods only to discover it leads to a lake. At the news, we all decided to head down and enjoy the evening, just to let go of all our worries and fears and establish one thing, if we’re going to die within the next few weeks, we’re going to die with no regrets. 

“He was a very tech savy kid, reminds me a lot of Ash if I’m honest” Hope’s comment brings me back to the group. 

“I’m sure he would be proud of you now” I respond as Hope thanks me. 

“I ugh, I know we’re not trying to get sentimental right now but I just want to say, thank you. Somehow, these last two days have helped me recover from his death more than the past few years” 

“It’s the realization that others do understand, maybe not in exact same way but it’s always a big help when someone understands what you’ve gone through” Theo replies to Hope 

“Cheers” Rampone raises her bottle of cheap beer “To this, to finding a rock and stone in a place like this” Rampone pauses to look around the lake that glimmers in rays of the sunset “To making new friends and to breathing, to finally being able to breathe without feeling like we’re crushing our own heart. We are not alone, we’re in this together. We all pain in different ways but somehow, it’s oddly the same” 

“And to Tobin” Syd adds “To our north star, our hero, our Commander, our friend” Everyone drinks of their beer and quickly pick up where we left off, enjoying the evening as if tomorrow tonight we’re our last day together. 

* * *

 

**Carli’s POV (A week later)**

“She’s starting to ask” Allie hisses at me we walk to the conference room. 

“Ash is too” I breathe as we enter the room “Any news” I ask the main agent in the commander room through the live stream. He shakes his head no I dismiss the live feed. 

“Where is she” Allie mumbled in desperation as she places her hands on a chair. It’s been hard on everyone since Tobin’s gone MIA along with half the our original squad. While it’s easier to make excuses for the disappearance of Hope and Tobin to the public, it is not as easy to fool a six year old, any less two grown adults but we have managed, somehow. 

“Any news yet” Abby enters the conference room with a cup of coffee. 

“None” I breathe as I take a seat in my chair. 

“Maybe we’re going about this all wrong” 

“How? She was injured” Allie shoots daggers at Abby

“I, right, yes she’s hurt okay, but if she wanted to be found she would have signaled us” 

“And the others, what about them, Tobin wasn’t with them” I point out

“That’s because Tobin ordered that” Abby replies 

“And if she did, for what” 

“Look, I’m as lost as you guys are but we have all our agents running at all times, we’ve searched the entire city, she’s not there. I know this is hard but we have to focus on making sure the media doesn’t catch on” Abby stresses 

“This is hard” Allie flips on Abby

“You’re not the only one who’s friend is”

“ENOUGH” Tim growls as he enters the room with Pinoe and Lauren “It’s been a damn fucking week and we have made no progress. I’m tired okay. I’m tired of hearing this banter between everyone. Tobin is gone okay. She’s gone and so is Hope and Becky and Syd and Theo, they’re all gone okay” Tim stops for air as his emotions threaten to show “I’m tired” He whispers as he pulls his chair out and lets his body fall onto it. Pinoe and Lauren follow suit and soon enough Kristie, Amy and the rest of the world leaders come in. Once everyone is settled in, I stand up and address them. 

“After some thinking…I have come to the conclusion that we simply can’t afford to bring more attention to that City. Jeri has already questioned it and Ash has tried multiple times to hack into our system. Again, thanks to Tobin’s thought out plan, our systems are three times faster and more secure than before. So, we thank her for that to. With that being said…I’m going to request we back up Jeri’s every command. Tobin’s last request was to made the front line and that is the only option we have now. The media is asking for Tobin and Hope and we have done what we can but there is only so much we can do. I’m sorry if this disappoints anyone but…theres nothing else we can do” I finish before taking a seat. The first person to leave the room is none other than Allie who is closely followed by Pinoe and Kristie. Tim leaves more respectfully with Amy and Lauren leaving me with the world leaders. After we finish up the meeting, I head upstairs and not at all surprised to find Alex and Kelley waiting for me. 

“How can I help you two” I breathe exhausted

“If you want to avoid having to address the media and having issues with Ash, Alice and Jeri then maybe it’s time we make a trip to the other world” Alex whispers causing my eyes nearly to fall out of their sockets. I take Alex and Kelley and drag them to my office where I nearly flip out on them. 

“Alright you two, I don’t know nor do I want to know what you two have planned but you CAN’T be saying that shit out in public”

“This is a safe house” Kelley points out

“Yeah but you’re forgetting we have visitors and world leaders who don’t know about that world” I hiss as I immediately toss their idea out of the window. 

“Will you just”

“No” I interrupt Kelley while opening my office door. Kelley rushes out while Alex lingers around.  

“Just think about it”

“Alex I”

“Please” Alex breathes before exiting my office. Closing the door, I let my shoulders fall and walk myself over to the couch. _Why did you have to leave now?_

* * *

 

**Ali’s POV (Two and a half weeks since Tobin saw Zane and found Ali)**

Every time I enter her room, she’s there…unmoved, incompetent, inexistent. The life in her eyes is gone, as if all of she’s ever done up until now no longer matters. If it weren’t for her beating heart and her vital’s monitor telling me that she is indeed breathing, I would medically claim that she is dead. The hardest part about seeing her like this is that somewhere in my bones, the thought of her actually being dead someday makes me feel dead on the inside too. 

It’s been nearly a week since she’s talked other than murmurs of ‘thank you’ and ‘water’ and while the longer this goes on, the harder it gets to watch, my heart tells me that all she needs right now is time. _And that’s what I’ll give her._  

Pushing her door open, I walk her small tray of food over to her nightstand. She stares through the holes in the walls, grasping onto the world outside, searching for something. 

“Are you cold” I ask as I see that her temperature is a little low. 

“No” She replies unmoved. I nod and walk over to the screen to make sure everything is okay. Her side has closed up and the remaining stitches are starting to disintegrate and continuing to repair the wounded cells but it is her left shoulder that concerns me. Though I am a well recognized doctor amongst small cities, I’m afraid I am no Elite Squad Doctor. Her left shoulder shows signs of prior tears, lacerations, dislocations, surgeries and if I’m right, some short of electrical shock. While she has multiple haunting scars, the ones on her shoulder make me wonder whats she been through and if the rumors about the forces were true, that elite agents did indeed suffer on the battle field and if so…is that why she took on her own region and began a revolution? 

“Are you in pain” I ask as I prep her vaccinations 

“No” She lies like she has for the past few days. I always want to ask why she’s lying about the pain she is in but always opt not to. Instead, I have begun to amp up her dosage of very ineffective pain medication. _If only there was some way to get stronger medication for her…she’ll go into shock if she continues to feel the intense pain._ Taking a sterilized needle, I walk over to her bed and move her arm towards me. Before I can inject the medication, she stops me. 

“That’s more than yesterdays dose” 

“That’s fine” I brush off as I move her right hand away

“No, I don’t need more” She replies 

“I’m the doctor” I reply, ignoring her comment

“That is more than”

“Enough” I silence her, quickly taking the opportunity to insert the needle and inject the pain medication. She sighs heavily as I clean up and exit the room. I spend the next few hours waiting until she falls asleep before going back inside her room. _She looks so peaceful when she’s asleep_. I have contemplated many times giving her sleeping medicine but opted out as I’m still not sure what is safe on her. She twitches in pain and moans with any movement of her shoulder every once in a while. The fourth night here, she cried in her sleep and since then, I knew that she was not well. I walk over to her side and check her vitals. _Below normal._ I sigh knowing theres only one thing to do. 

I set the monitor to alert me of any change and quickly pack a bag. Taking all the money I have and my medical license, I seal up my house and embark on an hour trip to the city not too far. It’s a little past 11pm and I know that in leaving my city, I am putting myself in danger but the thought of Tobin never getting up from that bed is a far worse risk then my own safety. 

Taking a seat on the public transportation bus, I tug my coat closer to me and place my feet on the seat besides me as to not allow space for anyone to occupy. While it is not in any way or form dangerous to ride public transportation, since my last interference with the dark agents, I have taken no chances with strangers. I have made sure to blend in with the public and keep my medical practices on the low to not call attention as the rumors of doctors being kidnapped have grown. A man up four rows stairs at me until his stop. I watch him get off and stare at me until his disappears with the darkness behind. 

“Last Stop” The bus driver calls. I stand up off my seat and get off at the station. I watch the bus drive away before slowly make my way down the street. As I walk to the warehouse, I make a mental note to hurry up and make it to the station at 3am to make it back home in time for Tobin to wake up. The walk to the warehouse takes a horrifying 43 minutes and once I arrive, I’m beat. 

“Hands up” The man at the door orders. I comply to his orders and he uses a wand to detect any weapon on me. When he finds none, he searches my package, again, to find nothing of harm. He puts his weapon away and opens the warehouse door for me. I whisper a thank you before entering. The smell of sex, drugs and disease hits me like smell of cinnamon pinecones at the end of Halloween. I do my best to keep the nausea in as I walk towards the man standing behind the very rustic and old cashier station in the lobby area of the warehouse.

“Name” 

“Alexandra Krieger” 

“ID” He asks and I hand him my identification card. 

“A doctor eh…what are you doing around here so late, this isn’t a place of…your status” He asks as he jots something down on a notepad. I try to make out his hand writing but fail miserably. _I’m the doctor, I should have doctor handwriting not you._

“Came to get medications” 

“Why here” He asks as he hands me back my ID.

“Pharmacies are closed this late” I lie. 

“Oh yeahhhh” He replies with a sloppy giggle as he extends his hand for the $100 entering fee. By the dilation and redness of his eyes, it’s clear that he is on cloud nine and by all means gullible beyond belief. I hand him the money and watch him punch the digits into the key pad that unlocks the door to the blackmarket “You pay for whatever you put in the basket” He warns me before handing me a very old hand basket they used in the old days and mustering the best smile he can. I offer a small giggle at his crooked smile before taking a deep breath and entering. 

The first thing that catches my eyes is the amount of guards present within the warehouse. Each with a heavy arm gun, ready to fire at anyone who tries to come in unwelcomed or anyone trying to steal. I gulp before proceeding down the various aisles of foods, supplies and medications these people have managed to store up and sell. 

While Kanatos is considered a wealthy region, various parts are actually very poor. The ongoing fight between the commander and the rebels, the dark agents and everyone else, things have really darkened in my region. Supplies and food have become even more expensive and rare while these crooks have become richer. 

It takes me ten minutes of wandering around until I find the medical section of the warehouse. As I lay my eyes on the abundance of rare and expensive medications they have accumulated on the rusty shelves, my heart drops. _Oh the people I could save with all these medications_ I think as I begin to search for the ones Tobin’s needs. Kneeling down to get a look at the lower shelves, a guard comes my way. 

“Find what you need” His strong voice interrupts me. 

“Not yet” 

“If you need any help, just call me” 

“Thank you” I softly smile and watch him walk away. I let out a deep breath and continue my search until I find one of the medications I need. Tossing only two vials into my basket, I continue down the aisle. While it takes me 40 minutes to gather all the medicines I’ll need to keep Tobin healthy for the next week,  I find myself wanting to look for medications for myself. _Now’s not the time, Tobin needs the medication more than you._ I swallow hard and remind myself that I can survive without them and proceed back to the front. As I make my way to the lobby, I find a kids aisle. I try hard to keep walking forward but I can’t. Backtracking, I walk down the aisle and take it all in. The baby clothes, the toys, the small little bath supplies and mittens. My eyes begin to water and I curse myself for thinking this would be a good idea. 

 _I’m sorry little peanut._ I say to myself as I rub my stomach, _I promise to-_ My thoughts are interrupted as someone pulls me back and covers my mouth. I try to kick and scream but they hold me firm. Everything races as I try to remove their arms around me but the sounds of guns firing forces both my aggressor and I to stop. _What have I gotten myself into?_


	5. Losing Doesn't Mean You've Lost

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WOW. I just realized how much this chapters title pertains to me. Please, please please read the chapter notes at the beginning and end. I have so much to tell you. I am back. And I am sorry it took me this long to find myself, but I am here. With a surprise spam of chapters as I never stopped writing :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry. I truly am. I left you guys whom looked into this story on the shelf. I wrote, a lot of chapters... probably around six and told myself to upload them but I couldn't bring myself to. Was I depressed? No, I would like to say that I was happy, so happy you guys. But my body, my subconscious mind and soul, they...were numb. For months I woke up and fell asleep, everyday the same state, numb, happy but numb. How does that work? I'm not entirely sure, the mind is powerful. After losing my scholarship in school, losing friends and my own priorities, I faced hard situations. All of which did not deal with me directly, rather, they were situations directed at those I loved around me. At that point, I realized I couldn't help them because I couldn't help myself. I opened up to my friends. The ones I still had and let them mend my wounds. I was sick, my body was tired and yes, I realized I was only happy when she was with me. Surprise you guys! The girl that I thought was playing me, well... I guess life was just setting us up for a happy ending :) Anyhow, after finding new ways to cope with my newly found losses in life, I started to find motivation, started to open up and ultimately, there are still days that are hard, still moments and situations that strain me and the ones I love but I am fighting the numbness and learning that life, can sometimes hand you L's, but that does not mean you have lost. You have a life ahead of you. 
> 
> So, I am sorry for not uploading chapters and putting you guys on pause. But I just couldn't find motivation in me to upload. But here I am, I will try to post three, including this one. They are pretty lengthy, but anyhow, I'm working on a story personally by me with no character affiliation so I might post that somewhere anonymous if I ever have the courage. That being said, I hope we can continue this journey together and end it with a high note. It's been so long I don't even know if you guys gave up but if you did, it's okay :) I will continue forward but I hope you guys didn't!
> 
> Oh and, I got my scholarship back! After finally confessing that I had a problem, the school I attend embraced me and told me that it was okay. I was allowed to mess up, it is a part of life. I wish I could say that I regained all my friends but I can't. Some, were merely friends I realized after they left when things got rough and others couldn't accept my newly formed relationship. It saddens me, days where I cry over those L's, but I have learned to love them from afar. I love you all and really hope you guys put your trust in me, I will finish this, before August, I promise.

Losing doesn’t mean you’ve Lost

“It’s me” Tobin’s voice whispers into my ear. The hairs on my arm rise as she slowly lets me go and I turn to see her there. 

“TOBIN” I half yell at her

“SHHHH” She hisses as she looks down both aisles of the warehouse ensuring no one heard “We’re not safe” She whispers as she takes my hand and pulls me with her. The sound of gunfire makes my breath hitch as Tobin leads us around the warehouse. As we run around, I take a look at her, she’s in her suit, the one I removed off of her when I got her to my apartment. _She broke into my safe…wait, why is that a surprise, she’s a pro assassin. But how is she here, how is she awake…I gave her a stronger dosage than an average individual would resist._ As I continue to ponder how the hell she got here or how she managed to sneak into the black market with such high security, I realize that she is in serious pain. _Her wounds…she must’ve reopened them getting here._

“Tobin” 

“Shhhh” she silences me as she finds a corner and pushing me in “Stay right here okay” Her pleading eyes stare into mine. 

“Where are you”

“Promise me you’ll stay right here” She begs as if she needs me alive. I nod yes knowing my voice will give away the lie “If anyone tries to take you, do this” She demonstrates a motion on my arm but stops “Doing this but for real will dislocate their shoulder, got it” 

“Yeah” I breathe a like scared. 

“Good, be back soon” She whispers before running down a aisle. I stare at where she stood in complete confusion. The gun shots alert me once again that this is for real, that I am in deed in danger. Quickly, I toss all the medicines I grabbed for Tobin into my bag and contemplate whether or not I’m going to try outsmarting Tobin again. With a single glance down at my stomach, the answer is evident. _Yes._

I run through the aisles as quickly and quietly as possible as the gun fire and yelling continues. As I reach a spot I sort of recall the lights go out. Normally now would be the time where the main characters hurries back to where the protagonist left them but I don’t. I continue to search for the medical aisle until I find it. Immediately I get to work in searching for all the meds that I need until the gun fire comes too close, forcing me away. 

“Where do you think you’re going” A voice stops me. I don’t need to turn around to confirm it’s a dark agent. He goes to grab my arm and in the panic of the moment, I weakly try the trick Tobin taught me. I fail miserably as he wraps his arms around me and begins to pull me away “I found her” The man speaks through his mic. As he pulls me away, bullets fly through the aisle, killing the agent and liberating me. I don’t take a second to glance at his blood thats splattered over me as I begun to run instead. I don’t look where I’m going and end up crashing into someone. Falling back onto the floor. The impact is hard causing everything to look fuzzy. I watch two blurry people fight until one of them pulls out a knife and slices the throat of the other without a pause in their actions. Before the lifeless body hits the ground, the person catches it and slowly places it on the ground before walking my way. They go to grab me but I try Tobin’s move once again with more confidence, succeeding at dislocating no one other than Tobin’s own left shoulder. 

“GAHHHHH” She screams as the blood in my body drains. 

“OH MY GOD” I yell as I quickly stand up. Tobin curses in agony as she tries to breath. 

“Here let me”

“No” She interrupts as she takes a deep breath and looks at me with disappointment. _Not only did I break the promise but I also managed to dislocate her shoulder._

“I” 

“Don’t” She sighs as she sees the medicine I went for on the ground. Her eyes seem more understanding when she looks back up at me “We have to go” She orders before hitting her shoulder against one of the shelves. The sound of her shoulder popping back into its place echoes throughout the water house and running feet can be heard. She quickly picks up the medicine for me and places it into my bag before taking it from me and carrying it herself. Tobin leads us through the gun fire between the dark agents and the gang members that run the warehouse in a quick manner. As if it hadn’t hit me yet that Tobin was, or is, a trained force agent, _the greatest scout in all history actually,_ seeing her slide into an aisle to take down three dark agents with just one knife in a matter of 40 seconds does the job. She catches all the bodies and lays them on the floor before pulling me with her. Not once does she look back, not once does she flitch like I do every time a bullet tears the through the air. _It’s as if nothing could surprise her._

“Okay, this is where you stay” She breathes as we’re only a few feet away from the exit. 

“What” I breathe in fear

“Don’t. Move. And don’t you dare look” Tobin demands of me. Something in her voice tells me that what’s about to happen is not for me. She takes my hands and places them in front of my eyes before leaving. I stay crouched down on by the shelves feeling all sorts of sick as Tobin goes out to the main area to do what I had only seen on TV. The amount of gun fire, yelling, fighting and screaming that goes on sends me into a state of shock as I begin to shiver. Soon enough there is silence and two pair of gentle hands remove my hands from my face. 

“Keep your eyes closed” Tobin orders more softly than before. She leads me out of the warehouse with my eyes closed and rushes us somewhere far. When I open my eyes, I see that we are in an abandoned alley a few blocks away from the warehouse. Tobin’s covered in blood from head to toe, her site on the ground. I expect to see anger in her eyes but all I see is tiredness. 

“Tobin I”

“Good Morning” She smiles softly as the first rays of the sun kiss our skin. I look in the direction of the sun and feel the guilt begin to settle in “We have to go” 

“We could take public transportation back to”

“Your home doesn’t exist anymore. I had to set it on fire so they wouldn’t find anything” Tobin breaks down for me. 

“Oh” Is all I mutter as her honestly takes me by surprise. 

“You were being followed” 

“I realized” I softly smile in an odd manner as I don’t know how to react to the news that my home is probably being scavenged right now by the fire department. 

“Here, change, we have to go, more will be coming” Tobin informs me as she takes clothes that are mine out of her own bag she’s hidden in a trash bin nearby. _She was prepared for this. But how?_ I stare at her. She senses my confusion but doesn’t speak as she walks to the other side of the bin to change and leaves me to do the same. 

 

* * *

**Tobin’s POV**

As I remove my scout suit and toss it on to the side, I look down at my stomach to see an open wound that traces from my hip to my lower rib cage on my right side. I swallow hard as my eyes advert to my left shoulder and see that I have indeed reopened my wounded and also managed to kill more fresh. Taking the medical kit from my backpack, I grab the last pain vaccine I have and inject it my diamond. My mouth bleeds as I bite on my cheeks and remove the needle from my diamond. The needle falls to the ground as my hands shake and I lean against the garbage bin, waiting for the shock of my body to go away. 

“I’m done” Ali half yells. 

“Almost” I reply as I quickly skip putting on a shirt and opt to wrap my lower stomach and shoulder in bandages and slip on a black zip up sweater I stole from Ali’s closet. Throwing everything back into my backpack, I walk to Ali and take a glance at her. She has a minor cut on her head but aside from that, she’s okay. _What a relief._ I sigh, before taking her hand and leading her away. She doesn’t ask and I don’t tell about the what happened, how it happened or where we’re going, she just remains silent. When we make it back on the main road, I order Ali to put her hoodie on as we walk through the streets, looking for a specific type of car that we can take. It takes a little longer than I had hoped to find the specific car model but at last I don’t complain as the owner left water and some food in the car. 

“Come on, you need to eat” I instruct Ali as I hand her some snacks I found. She takes them slowly as I place our backpacks in the trunk. I reach into the bag I took from Ali and reach search for a specific medicine. Once I find it, I pop the new bottle open, grab two pills and shut the bottle and close the trunk. “Here” I say as I place the pills in Ali’s hands. She stares at me, unknowing what to say “The little guy needs his food too” I shrug as I proceed to hot wire the car. Ali’s eyes remain on me for a few seconds before she takes a water bottle and drinks the pills. 

The drive is silent for the first few hours, every so often I’ll ask Ali how she feels and if she needs anything but usually it’s the same answer, I’m good thank you. She stares at me wondering how I’m still alive but never once voice it. 

When it gets dark, I park the car in an abandoned alley and tell her to get some sleep. I expect her to oppose but she doesn’t. Only two minutes go by before she’s sound asleep, leaving me to myself. I get out of the car and open the trunk to see what exactly Ali got from the warehouse. _Medicine, Medicine, vitamins…she needs all this except…these._ I grab two new bottles of what I know to be medicine for me and shut the trunk. I walk to the drivers door and sit on the drivers seat as I play with the cars settings. With my skills, it takes only take a minute to reprogram the entire car to my command and undo my hot wiring before safely turning on the car as it should be. 

“What can I do for you” The weird car voices asks. 

“Lock the doors, don't open until I come back” I order before I type in the password I set up. The car system locks as I shut the door and give the car one good look before running into the darkness of the night. 

I find a pawn shop that is still open and quickly go inside to exchange a bottle of the rare medicine for a large amount of supplies that I need. The man behind the desk looks at me funny but doesn’t question me at all as I take a shopping cart with all the things I grab and head back to the car. On the way there, I run into a kids store and halt. _Alice._ I think as I see a bike behind the display window. The tears well up as I think of my little girl crying into her Aunts arms, begging to know where I am. _I’ll make it back to you, someday, I’ll be back with you._ I give the bike one last glance before pushing the cart and heading to the next store. 

“Are you sure you need all this” The man asks awkwardly as he stares at the large amount of water, food, vitamins and random articles of clothing I placed into my cart. 

“Yeah, and can I get two car batteries” I ask. The man’s eyebrows brow but he walks back into his office and places two new car batteries in my basket. 

“I still feel as though you’re not taking enough in exchange for these pills” He confesses as I place the pills on the counter. 

“Keeping the details on how you got them to yourself is more than anything you could offer” He nods and takes the pills and I begin to leave. 

“Be safe” He whispers as I exit “We need you” I give him a nod before putting my hoodie up and rushing back to the car. When I see that it’s still untouched, I sigh in relief and load up everything that I got in exchange for the pills to the trunk. Taking a few old phones and hard drives with me into the car, I take a bite out of a lousy thing these people call bread and glance at Ali. She’s still sound asleep which I thank as I take the opportunity to check my hurting wounds. The site of them doesn’t scare me but the not numbness of my shoulder does. I poke my finger and ring finger but don’t feel a thing. My eyes seal shut knowing what that means but nonetheless, push through it. I get to work on my small device until Ali’s awakes. 

“What are you doing” 

“Making something” I reply as I continue to work. 

“Where’d you get it”

“The store” 

“How” 

“Bargain” I shrug. She reaches for the door handle but I stop her. 

“We have to get going, I didn’t want to wake you but we have to make up for lost time” I explain as my vitals have dropped significantly in the last few hours. _If I don’t get to Becky in time, we’re both as good as dead._

“Tobin”

“Buckle up” I avoid her as I start the car and put my small device away. She sighs and does as told and we’re off. We’re on the road till sunset again as we reach another city. 

“I need to use the rest room” Ali yawns. 

“Okay, lets go, you need to stretch your legs” I open her door and help her out. We walk to a small fast food place and she quickly excuses herself to the bathroom. I take a seat at a booth and keep on alert. My eyes are stuck on my hands as I focus on trying to breath normal which my cuts bleeding. 

“Mommy can we get that” A little voice brings my attention up. It belongs to a small girl around the same age as Alice. Though the little girl makes me cringe, it is her mother that steals the wind out of me. She’s an exact replica of Alex and it hits me right then and there. 

“Tobin” Ali’s voice brings me back to reality as she follows my stare to the women. 

“Lets go” I breathe as I stand and quickly hurry out. We make it to the car and I opt to keep driving. Ali doesn’t oppose and we soon fall into a rhyme of driving and stopping. We’re on the road for four days until Ali finally asks where we’re going. 

“We’re almost there” I cough as I have worsened in all areas. Ali has restitched my wounds and done the best she can to control the infection but it is obvious to both of us that I need help. _Help only Becky can get me._ Ali reaches to her bag to grab the medicine I know she’s looking for but never finds it. As everything clicks in her head, I brace myself for her medical lecture but it never comes. 

“You could’ve traded my vitamins” She huffs in defeat as I went behind her back to get all the supplies we’ve been living off with medicine she got for me. _The medicine she risked her life to get me._

“There vitamins” I reply as I nod at her stomach. She falls silent until she asks about a comment I made back at the warehouse. 

“Little guy, what makes you think it’s a boy” 

“Because…why not” I reply. 

“It could be a girl” 

“But also a guy” 

“Why do you want it to be a boy” Ali asks. _Because Ash has always wanted a little boy._

“I dunno” I lie as I make a turn onto a new street and park the car on the side. 

“What are you doing now” 

“Just making sure we don’t die” I inform her as I grab the device I made and hook it up to the cars system. I quickly rush to the truck to grab the two car batteries I bought and bring them inside. I hook everything together until I have something that sorta looks like a bomb. Ali’s ginormous eyes stare into mine as I grin. _I can’t believe I actually did it._

“I’m sorry, what” Ali asks as she scans the device. 

“Don’t worry, it’s not set to explode for another 4 hours” I joke which cause Ali to glare at me “I’m kidding” 

“Now’s not the time for jokes, you’re infection has worsened and if we don’t get you help…you’re going to die, I’m still having side effects of shock and if you don’t realize it, people are looking for you and I, now, if your way of cooping with all this is making sick jokes then I” Ali begins ranting. I burst out in laughter as for one, laughing keeps me from accepting that she is right and two, laughing because she doesn’t see just how right she is “Tobin I swear if you don’t start explaining whats going on I will”

“Okay okay, its just a device to bounce electrical magnitudes away from us and advert wave lengths of…very powerful weapons in other directions…basically make us invisible” 

“Excuse me” 

“Are you ready” I ask 

“For what” 

“We’re almost there” 

“Where, we’re in the middle of no where” 

“To meet our destiny” I whisper as I turn the car on and get back on the lonely road. Ali doesn’t reply as she settles into her quiet state and just stares. I drive for another four hours until my watches coordinates read the desired ones “Hold on” I warn Ali as I go off road and begin into the woods. As the coordinates on my watch come closer and closer to the ones I know they should be, my heart beats faster. _Please still be here, please._ I beg as I continue to drive slowly through the woods. As the coordinates read just 400 meters away, I slow down and turn on my device. 

“What happens now” Ali whispers

“We pray it works” I reply. Ali gulps and I push on the gas pedal. As we enter the perimeters, I stop the car, waiting for a missile to hit us. 

“Tobin” 

“Yeah” 

“It worked” 

“Yeah” I reply a little shocked as I continue forward until the cabin comes into sight. Ali gasps at the sight as I search for anyone in sight. Putting the car on park, I stare at the steering wheel in silence for a couple of minutes. _They’re not here, they should’ve read the radar and saw us coming._

“Tobin” Ali’s trembling voice whispers. I look through the tinted windows to see a dark agent standing just 100 meters from me.

“Whatever happens, stay right here” I order Ali. 

“Tobin” 

“Just, just stay right here” I order as I grab my elite knife and slide it into my belt. I slowly open the door and get out of the car. My back is turned to them and I do my best to keep the pain of my movement inside as I slowly turn to look at the agent. 

“Oh my god” She breathes in disbelief as I barely make it out to the front of the car before falling. “BECKY, BECKY…oh my god Tobin, BECKY” Christen throws her helmet onto the ground and rushes to my side. 

“TOBIN” Becky runs towards me with a medical kit “What happened” She asks as she rummages through her kits to grab a revive needle. She turns me on my side and goes straight for it, not warning me that it’ll hurt. As the medicine kicks in, I find my body going numb and staring up in the sky. The sound of the passenger door opening sends all eyes in the direction of the car. As everyone lays eyes on Ali, I get up and slowly walk over to her. 

“Team, meet Alexandra Krieger…a friend I met” I introduce with a some sadness. Their eyes all stare at the baby bump, pain evident in their eyes. 

“Welcome” Christie is the first to walk over “I’m” 

“Christie Rampone” Ali smiles as she shakes her hand 

“Call me Cap” Rampone smiles back. 

“Lets get you inside” I break the silence, leading Ali into the safe house. Rampone stares down the unresponsive team as I lead Ali to what will be her room. “Shower and change, dinner in two” I instruct her before closing her door. Becky immediately leads me to the medical lab in the house and quickly hooks me up to a machine that restores my vitals in a matter of seconds. My body begins to numb as Becky begins the process of analyzing my wounds. 

“How are you still alive” She breathes as she slowly unzips my blood soaked sweater. 

“Ali” I cough with a dry throat. Becky quickly adjusts some settings to the machine and soon, I a small dispense of medicine go into my diamond. 

“Better” Becky asks as she begins to prep her tools needed to completely seal my wounds shut. 

“Yeah, thanks” I breathe. I let a few minutes go by before stopping Becky who doesn’t seem to know where to start “How…bad is it” 

“Not bad at”

“Becks. Don’t lie to me” I whisper knowing that something is clearly wrong. Becky sets down an instrument and her shoulders fall. Her back is to me but it’s clear that she is devastated. 

“Your shoulder…It’s, it’s” 

“I can’t feel my left pinky nor ring finger” I point out. Becky swallows hard confirming my suspicions of nerve damage “I felt it, when his knife went in, I knew then and there that I wasn’t ever going to be the same. I know the nerves are damaged, I won’t feel those two fingers ever again but my shoulder” 

“You’ll recover full rotation and movability of your shoulder, the muscle can easily be regained, the nerve damage in your shoulder in particular is mild…but another single tear…and I’m afraid you’ll lose sensation of it”  

“Okay” I nod and shut my mouth. Becky quickly gets to work on me, getting everything done in just forty minutes. When I stand, I look in the mirror and stare at the new scars. 

“You could always trans-”

“No” I interrupt as I pull my shirt down and put the arm sleeve on. Becky murmurs a thank you as I don’t fight with her about wearing it. I wait for her to finish cleaning up before heading to the door. 

“Tobin” 

“Yeah” I stop and turn to look at Becky. She wants to say something, I can tell because her eyes lose focus but something is stopping her. What it is, I don’t know. Do I want to know? Of course. But right now, all I want to breathe. 

“We’re going to talk about what happened right” Becky asks as she shakes her initial thoughts away. 

“We will” I respond before leaving. I walk through the cabin until I find the backdoor and let myself out. Taking a seat on the steps of the deck, I rest my head in my hands and let out a deep sigh. 

“It’s nice to see you…with color” Ali breathes as she closes the french doors and makes her way over to me. 

“Yeah, the meds we get…they’re strong” I explain

“You don’t say, your up and walking. Back to basically 100%” 

“They work wonders” 

“And doesn’t that make you wonder” Ali whispers.

“What you said, I don’t know if thats true or not. It doesn’t make sense, why would they put diamonds in us if they kill us” 

“Well, only if you don’t get the venom out or get the antidote. And they could have not estimated the side effects, I mean, no one would’ve known if you hadn’t taken down the forces” 

“Becky would know” 

“Tobin” 

“Sorry” I apologize hearing her tired voice “It’s just that” I pause to look down the path that leads into the woods “Nothing makes sense anymore. I mean, it never has to begin with but Zane’s alive and I can’t wrap my head around how. Why? Why he didn’t seem to remember me” 

“We think he was hijacked” Rampone’s voice rings as she walks into our perimeter from the side of the house. 

“Like, hunger games stuff” Ali asks making my ears perk. _A woman of good literature._

“Something like that” 

“How” 

“By who” I whisper under my breath

“We don’t know, but whoever they are…they’re looking out for something, they’re targeting”

“Hospitals” I interrupt Christie. She stares at me puzzled that I know. I glance at Ali whom seems to read my expression without a problem. 

“How’d you know” 

“I think it time for dinner” I avoid her question and stand. Helping Ali off the steps, we walk inside adn gather around the small table. Chairs have been added to accommodate Ali and I. 

“Wow, this looks…amazing” I breathe as I push Ali’s chair in as she sits and quickly follow myself. 

“Thank you” Dzsenifer smirks as she’s the last to sit down. 

“Wait, you cook” I ask completely dumbfounded. _How stupid am I, of course she cooks, she’s human, humans eat and cook Tobin._ I mentally slap myself as Sasic and Hope giggle. 

“A little, it’s what I do on my free time. If it weren’t for the Forces, I would’ve been a chef” Dzsenifer replies and I oddly find it, nice. 

“Well, if the food tastes anything like it smells like, then…I’m sure you would’ve been very successful” Ali inhales the smell of the sweet aroma of spices. 

“How about a little music” Becky asks as she walks over to the small radio box. She puts on a soothing station and we begin to eat. A quarter into my bowl of yumminess, I begin to feel sick and opt to drink some of the bottled solution Becky prepared for me instead. Everyone continues to grub and a small peace settles in my chest allowing me to breathe as Ali is finally able to eat the proper nutrients for her and the baby. 

“So, Ali, you’re a doctor” Hope comments. I immediately raise my sight to her as does Becky. Ali stares at her confused as I introduced Ali as a friend, not a doctor. 

“Sorry, I mentioned it to her” Becky quickly saves us. Sasic gives me a side glance not missing the pauses in the room. 

“Oh, yeah, I am” Ali smiles.

“That’s awesome” Hope beams “Scary but awesome” She adds. I mentally slap myself as Hope continues to edge the waters of thee oblivion that some of these folks have yet to discover. Thankfully, one by one, everyone gets up and heads to bed. I’m left sitting at the empty table with just the radio on. 

I close my eyes and inhale the sweet smell of the trees. The cool air the lingers around the cabin gives me comfort as it reminds me of my quarter. Time passes and soon dawn turns to midnight yet I’m still here. As the song on the radio comes to an end, the radio jockey interrupts the ongoing station to deliver some news. 

“Good morninggggg folks of Western Kanatos. It’s 1am local time and 8am Heartless time. Theres some big news floating around…Tobin Heath will make her first public appearance to the world this next Friday” The man speaks with much surprise as mine as my eyes shoot open “That’s right folks, the much awaited appearance of the presumed dead Scout will finally be. And while I don’t want to get your hopes that high, it is also presumed she is a changed women as her sacrifices and hidden truths have come to the light…Why now you may ask? Indeed after her movement with the world leaders and involvement with the reconstruction of her Region’s Capital, it would seem she would’ve made a world appearance by now. Wrong. As it turns out, its take more than just the world in chaos for the legend to come to the light. Miss Heath will be hosting a public appearance open to questioning next Friday, two days before the grand celebration of her close mate Christen and frienemy Alex Morgan at which she is expected to be at as it is the first few homes established in the ruins of Axiom” The man explains as my thoughts struggle to put it all together. _Did Carli arrange this? Is this a warning? Is she asking me to come back by Friday? Is my disappearance that hard to cover up?!_ “But enough of the chitchat, here a recording of her on the phone with another news station confirming the appearance” The man pauses and plays what is indeed my voice “Well, there you have it folks. Hoaxes or not, we are ready. While it is hard to completely understand what went down just a few months ago it is clear that the fight isn’t over. If anyone, and I don’t say this lightly being a Kanatos native, if anyone can help establish equilibrium in all the regions, it is no one other than the girl who was never short of being a true hero. That’s all for this morning folks, good morning or good night, hope you’re all out there doing something to make this a better place” As the music returns, I’m left staring at the empty table. _What did they do?_ I ask as my eyes look up to meet Ali’s. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So? haha so much going on, please keep reading, don't give up on Tobin!


	6. Interruptions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heres another one haha

Interruptions (Part 1) 

“Run that by me one more time” Becky asks Ali as everyone stands in the command room of the Cabin, utterly shocked to hear that we could die. 

“The dark agents, they’re targeting doctors in hopes of finding something, I’m not sure what it is but it’s a cure of the diamonds side effects. You see, the diamonds begin to kill if it doesn’t get it’s required dose of whatever it needs. Look I had only done mild research until” 

“That’s enough” I interrupt Ali as I put my hand on her shoulder and bring her behind me, sheltering her from her past “We’re at risk, we can outsmart the diamonds by removing the poison it leaks as a byproduct the way Ali did to me but diamonds are self adapting. They won’t be outsmarted for long. I need you guys to think what could Citadel, I mean the forces have given us in dosages that we would’ve not noticed”

“Our chemical solutions, the ones we drank” 

“No, no I ran tests on those…those really were just solutions to establish equilibrium to our high demanding bodies and abilities. They’re complicated but truly they are what the forces told us they were, our bodies source of nutrients. How else do you think we survived without eating for long periods” Becky explains as she crosses her arms in thought. 

“Again, I don’t mean to offend, but why do we still need the diamonds” Hope asks 

“It’s not just for our bodies, it’s a psychological thing” Both Becky and Ali say at the same time causing some of us to giggle. 

“Look, I don’t know much about the forces or anything in specific but having a source of energy and reassurance in the back of your neck for 10 plus years does its damage to you. I mean, would you have jumped in front of shooting bullets if you knew there was no way back” Ali asks Hope whom shakes her head no. 

“Its beyond that even, diamonds are much more than a safety net for the forces, it’s everything. The diamonds are connected to our nervous system and brain. Everything that defines us, personality, memories, habits…it’s all stored in…”

“Oh my god” I breathe as it hits me “They don’t just want to cure…they want the memories. The dark agents, Zane…he didn’t remember me” 

“So it’s not like the hunger games” Ali asks a bit confused

“No in those books, they messed with the dudes memories but Zane…he was different” 

“But how” Sasic asks “Is there such device made possible to withdraw the information from diamonds” 

“Not that I know of…but there might be someone that does” Becky glances at me. Everyone’s eyes turn to greet mine and soon enough, the detailed conversation of everything that’s happened goes down. 

We spend ten hours in the command room, ten hours discussing everything that has happened since we went into hiding. And now, we train. The pain is evident, my heart torn, but they are all there. Each and every selected agent including Rampone and Christen are there. Maybe we’re all in pieces, but together, we’re whole. Christen let us know of the plans Jeri had told her before everything unfolded and we set our own plan into action. **_Let the chaos begin._**

* * *

**Five Days later**

“So how’d you guys manage to get your hands on a dark suit” I ask Christie and Sasic as I hold some ropes over my shoulder and walk behind them. 

“We made it” Sasic shrugs 

“Really” I ask impressed 

“Yeah, we used our suits camera’s to review the film, decided that blending in would be useful” 

“Wow, I’m impressed” I compliment. Sasic smiles and we continue to walk. I drop the ropes by the steps of the cabin and head to the command room. 

“How’s everything looking” I ask Hope, Theo and Nadine whom all stare at separate screens, their hands at work with coding. 

“It’ll be ready by 5, if Nadine hurries up” Theo teases causing Nadine to shake her head. I leave the command room and head down to Becky’s lab where she and Ali are in deep conversation. The glass doors open but they fail to even glance at me. 

“Have you ever tried this method” Ali asks as she looks through a microscope. 

“Never even knew it existed” Becky breathes. I clear my throat and both murmur a hey causing me to roll my eyes. 

“Begin with the warm ups” Becky instructs as she tosses me a rolling foam and begins to pull up my chart. 

“yes sir” I whisper under my breathe, irritated that the function of my shoulder hasn’t improved much since we set our plan. 

“Relax your shoulder” Ali whispers as she places a hand on my shoulder and guides my arm through the motions. I comply to her instructions for the 30 minute warm up before my shoulder begins to stiffen. 

“Hold it” Becky hurries to my side, as Ali quickly plugs a reading device into my diamond. I clench my jaw as the pain shoots through my arm and down to my spine, igniting flames throughout my back “Just a little more” Becky comforts me as Ali begins to types in commands and tries to locate the exact location of the nerve damage. Before the device can give her an exact spot, I let my shoulder fall and let the tears come out. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay, 10 seconds longer than last time” Becky whispers as she rubs my back and I hold my left arm close as it throbs. Ali quickly injects a small sedative that numbs my arm and allows me to recover. 

“Well, I do have to say, at least we know the tissue” Ali points out as she looks at the result “Here is your shoulder, we initially thought the nerves damaged where these ones but that wouldn’t explain why you couldn’t feel your ring finger. But look, here is the region we can focus on” Ali says as she turns the screen to show Becky whom doesn’t look as optimistic as Ali. _I know that face…_

“What is it” I ask Becky whom sighs deeply “Just say it” I plead as she takes a moment. 

“Those…nerves…in the forces, during the med program…nerves can’t be repaired” Becky huffs endangered all of a sudden  “Mended but not repaired. Obviously, in the forces we can do a little more and are able to repair some nerves with diamonds…that region isn’t one of them” She explains before throwing the foam roller across the room and leaving the lab. 

“I’m lost” Ali confesses as she takes a seat besides me. 

“We can’t fix my shoulder, thats basically it” I state as I stare down at my ring finger. A hint of sadness evident in my voice. 

“Can’t you transcend” 

“It doesn’t work like that…it’s a common misconception. Transcending was made for the purpose of never having to sacrifice a life. I mean, it’s not a 100% guarantee that we’ll transcend with all our memories and everything but it’s a solid 98%. The thing is, it takes everything from your prior body’s DNA, codes, nerves, memories, and all that and puts it into a new body. But that doesn’t fix the coding, that doesn’t fix my nerves. It simply eliminates the recovery and the scars. Not the actual damage” 

“Oh” Ali murmurs. I sigh and begin to put on my zip up sweater “I’m sorry”

“Excuse me” I stop and turn to look at Ali. 

“Maybe I could’ve done more when I found you to save more of your nerves” 

“It’s not your fault…really it was Sasic’s squad…they used an illegal spike and well, ever since, my shoulders been rough. But we can’t do anything about it now. We have much bigger things to focus on” I offer a tight smile before leaving the lab and heading up to my office. 

“Everything alright” I ask Christen whom waits by my door. 

“I don’t know” She answers honestly. I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight. 

“You belong here. You’re apart of this squad. We need you, I need you, okay?” I whisper into her hair. She nods her head against my shoulder and I pull away from her “Go on, we leave soon” 

I enter my office and walk over to my chair. As my body clashes with the back of the chair, I close my eyes and take a second to breathe. _It’ll all work out okay, if everyone does their job, it’ll all be okay._

* * *

I run my fingers along the edge of the vent’s entrance and quietly pop it off. Laying it besides me, I slide into the vent and close it. While I’m not big, by no means did I think the vent would be this small. 

“Everything alright” Christie’s voice rings in my ears

“Perfect” I reply as I reach the intersection that will lead me to my destination. 

“Before the system cuts off, make sure you’re the only one that talks. Can’t have him recognizing the others” 

“I know Cap” I reply as I buckle the harness to my belt. She disconnects our connection and I finish tying a knot. Once I’m done, I close my eyes and take a moment to myself “Its go time” I mutter under my breath seconds later. Clicking the button on my sleeve, I jump down into the darkness of the vent and begin to fall. Once my feet go through the vent, I brace for impact. Landing on my shoulder, I roll to control the momentum of my fall. My gun points straight at him as I look up. 

“Well, I want to be surprised but I can’t say I am” He sighs as he takes a seat at his desk. Theo and Sasic enter the building through two separate entrances and he seems impressed “Now that I didn’t expect. You’ve added two to your squad…who do I have the pleasure of having in my presence” 

“That’s nothing that concerns you” I reply as I nod for Theo to tie him up. 

“Really? Is this necessary? Come on Tobin” 

“That’s Heath to you sir…and yes, it is. You always seem to stick your hands where they don’t belong” I reply as I walk towards the door. 

“Coming from you, that means nothing” He laughs causing my body to freeze. 

“At least I gave it all for them” I bark at him. His grin drops and I stare at him from the door “Can’t say you did that can you. They may have forgotten but I didn’t.” I pause to let the weight of his actions to settle upon him “That’s what I thought Michael” I walk out of the room and let Theo and Sasic finish tying him. We quickly leave Citadel and head to a secret base. I walk towards Hope whom stares at Michael through the screen. 

“You sure you want to be watching” I ask as I take a folder from Rampone and crack my neck. 

“You’re not going to hurt him, are you” Hope asks with worry in her eyes. _Tough face, soft heart._

“Not physically” I reply with a sigh. 

“I’ll stay” She replies and I nod. 

“Grab some coffee, it’s going to be a while” I huff. Thanking Rampone, I exit the small camera room before walking to the center where Michael is being held. Becky, Syd and Christen await outside of the confined room, just staring at Michael. They meet my eyes and I give them a nod. Reaching for the door handle, I take a moment before entering… ** _Don’t be a fool_** _…_ I shake the shivers and open the door. Michael stares at his cup of coffee and slowly looks up. 

“Funny how Christen’s new filter program cleans the water more efficient, yet it still has the same taste” 

“Yes, well, we can’t fix all your mistakes now can we” I joke as I toss the file in his direction and lean against the black plated wall. 

“Was this room really necessary” He asks as he puts his glasses on and opens the file. 

“That depends”

“On” He pauses to look at me.

“Your behavior” He lets out a suppressed laugh before focusing on the file. I give him the time needed to read through every paper. 

“I can’t help you” He says before sliding the folder my way. 

“You can’t or you won’t” I ask for calcification. 

“I won’t” He replies before holding his hands together on the table. I straighten my back and let out a deep sigh “Some things are meant to be kept a secret” 

“Like the sabotage of human memories?!” I yell enraged

“Or the creation of a new elite squad” He throws at me with a shrug “I mean, I’m sure my youngest knows but Jeri…or Ash. Do they know you’re working behind their backs” 

“You wouldn’t”

“Look Tobin, every human, including you, has a dark side. A side that comes out when the things we love are threatened” 

“Oh your precious money, you don’t need to worry about that, I don’t need it” 

“Of course you don’t, why look at this place. You spent it well” 

“Look Mr. Morgan, I don’t have time for your stupid games. What are these agents looking for? Why are they targeting doctors and why did they need Zane” 

“It’s funny how you’re asking me but I’m sure if you used that brain of yours, you could answer them” 

“What’s that supposed to mean” 

“You don’t remember” He looks at me as I stare at him confused. 

“Cut the crap Michael, is there or is there not an independent substance the diamonds need to function” 

“Let me ask you, which one of them do you really love” 

“I could ask you the same” I breath, lifting my chin, catching him in his own game “Because it sure ain’t both” 

“You’re talking crazy, they are my daughters” He belts at me. 

“So you were going to Alex die on that tower and now you’re letting Jeri put her life in danger” 

“Well, I’m not that stupid, that’s what you’re for” 

“So you admit it, you exploited me” I say clenching my jaw. 

“I would say I exhausted my assets as a member of the board” … ** _Play the fool_** _…_ I think as I lower my eyes to his and smile. 

“Thank you so much for cooperating with us Mr.Morgan, you’ll be liberated soon” I smile before opening the door and walking out. Becky, Syd and Christen greet me with smiles. 

“We got him” 

“We did” I beam at Becky “Get the info to Theo so he can finish hacking into the system. Come on guys we’re going to be late” I grab Syd and Christen’s hands and rush out. I swing the camera door open causing Hope and Rampone to look up at me “Let’s go, we still have to change” 

“Why didn’t we kidnap him sooner” 

“I thought having Steps 1-2-3 in one day would be fun” I grin at Rampone who rolls her eyes. 

“And Ali” Hope asks

“She’s waiting in the car, everyone meet there in 10” I order before hustling to my room. I see that Sasic’s squad did a good job setting up everything for step 2 as I find the outfit I picked ironed and ready for me to change. _Got to thank them later._ I slip out of my black suit and quickly hop into my black skinnies, a loose white button up and slide my feet into black booties with a metallic black detailed tip. Unhooking the hanger, I grab the black leather jacket and put it on. With on glance to the mirror, I’m out the door. 

“How do I look” I smile at Ali whom rubs her small bump, waiting by the car in the large warehouse. 

“As good as always” She smiles “Except, move this up a little so people can see your new watch” Ali giggles as she adjusts my right sleeve to show off the new watch that Theo and Hope designed for me. 

“Thank you” 

“My pleasure” 

“We are all set” Nadine says as she closes the trunk of the car. 

“Good, top priority is keeping Ali safe” 

“She’s in good hands” Rampone walks my way along with Hope, Syd and Christen, all four showing off beautiful gowns. 

“That she is, you three be safe okay” I look between Nadine and Ali whom nod. Ali gives us all a hug before getting into the backseat of the black out car and Nadine driving. We help open the warehouse doors and quickly close them. 

“Here are your microphones” Hope hands us small boxes. The size of them are outstanding. She guides us into putting them in our ears and how to work the settings “Does that make sense” 

“Well, lets test it…Theo, can you hear me” 

“Loud and clear Scout” He replies and I laugh. 

“You two out done yourself” I applaud Hope and Theo. We disconnect the microphones and proceed to our cars. Everyone loads up into Hope’s car but I stop Christen. 

“Hey, I think this is kind of late but I want to tell you how proud I am. You’ve be of such support to” My voice is cut off by her arms as she wraps them around me tightly. 

“I know, I know, thank you” She whispers before letting go and getting into the car. I watch them leave before rushing to my own car. 

The drive makes my anticipation grow. Every turn, every light, every single bump makes my stomach sink and my heart swell. As I pull into an abandoned street, I shut the car off. I sit in darkness letting everything catch up to me until a knock on the window startles me. _Sasic._

“Aye Mate” 

“Howdy” I mumble as I stare into the darkness straight ahead. 

“You aren’t having second thoughts are you” Sasic studies me

“No, I just wish this were happening under different circumstances” 

“We weren’t ready to join the forces, and we sure weren’t ready for this but here we are. Look, I know it’s going to be hard and that this is personal but something tells me that we’re right about this. This is what we were meant for” 

“You think so” 

“I know, now come on, it’s a long walk” Sasic and I get out of the car and cover it with a camouflage cover. We break into a recked building, put our head flashlights on and search the dusty place. It takes a few minutes of rummaging through the disaster before we find it. 

“Over here” I call for Sasic who runs over. 

“Here, let me do it, don’t get yourself more dirty than you already have” She giggles as she uses her strength to pop the sealed tunnel hole open. When she manages to open the hole going down into the ground, a cloud of dust escapes into lighter air, covering a good portion of my outfit. 

“Here, Sasic pulls out a small rage from her pocket before lighting a small glow stick and tossing it down the hole. We wait to hear it hit the floor. 

“4 seconds…that’s at least 40 feet” I whisper. Sasic lets out a heavy sigh. 

“We have to get going, our estimate on the length is well… an estimate and you have an hour so lets go” 

Sasic helps me go down first. I grip onto the rusty rails of the ladder as I begin to descend. It gets harder to breathe as the density rises and the pressure of the air pushes against us. As I touch ground, I face down the tunnel and see nothing. 

“Wow, your people are some engineers” Sasic breathes

“We are the technology region” I shrug

“That is true…but this. To build this under your nose” 

“I get your point…”

“Sorry” 

“No you’re not” I laugh and Sasic does to. We converse through the darkness, our head lamps being the only source of light until we reach a sign that cues us that we’re close. 

“Well Scout, this is where we part” Sasic stops 

“Thank you for your help, it has been an honor working with you” I extend my hand to Sasic whom takes it. 

“The pleasure is mine. We’ve had our differences but I see now that you did it for your people, not for them”

“Our values are mutual. I hold nothing against you” 

“Not even the shoulder” Sasic giggles nervously 

“Not even that. Your squad complimented my select four far beyond my imagination” 

“I’d say, in another world, we’d work well together” 

“Perhaps…in another world” I whisper to myself as I think of that other world and how Sasic is a futbol player as am I. _But she doesn’t know that, she doesn’t know just how much she’s helped but she’s not ready for that, and that is my burden to carry._ “Alright, get going, your squad needs you” 

“We’ll be close” Sasic yells as she begins to sprint in the opposite direction of where I stand. I look into the tunnel until the light of her head lamp disappears and becomes nothing in the matter of darkness. Slowly, I turn around and continue through the tunnel. The walk is rather cold and lonely but in an unknown way, it’s soothing. It feels as though this is where I belong. I get so caught up staring down at the ground that I hadn’t realized that the only darkness around me was the color of my shoes and jeans. 

“Oh wow” I breathe as the tunnel walls are solid ground. I run my hand over the dirt and feel its texture against my finger tips. The sense of belonging increases and I feel at one with the earth in that moment. As I reach the ladder up, I take a moment to clean up my attire and begin to climb. As the rotating lever comes to sight, I reach up and begin to turn it. 

“Jesus” I curse as I realize how stiff it is. Putting more of my back into, the exit begins to open. The light blinds me as I push it open. 

“Give me your hand” Hope’s voice guides me. She grabs to my elbow and helps pull me out. 

“Thanks” I murmur as I rub my eyes and see we’re in the basement of the building “Well…I applaud the rebels…never would’ve guessed a tunnel that long would lead here” 

“How long was it” Syd asks as Hope and Rampone begin to cover the secret entrance. 

“A few miles” I reply as Syd fixes my outfit. 

“Well, good thing, it took us a while to find that entrance” Press confesses 

“Were you guys spotted” 

“Nope” 

“Good, are we ready to go” I ask as I look at my four friends. Everyone nods slowly, a bit scared but courageous “Then let’s go, it’s about to begin” 

We walk through the basement tunnels until we reach the stairs. We all say our good wishes and part ways. Hope and Syd rush up four flights as Press and Rampone only go up only one. I slowly take my time to walk up three and stop as my hand reaches the door handle. I stay still for a few seconds, letting my lungs become accustom to the change of density in the atmosphere. _Its time._ I remind myself as I swing the door open. People rush all over the backstage, yelling orders and following them. I’m invisible to them as my eyes search for something, someone in particular. The infamous announcer’s voice rings through ears as my eyes fall on her. _There you are,_ I think as I stare at her, _no one would ever guess…_ I walk to her as the announcer continues the introduction… _that she isn’t me._

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the moment we’ve all been waiting for” The announcer speaks into the microphone. Her hands rub against her side as she stares at the screen that displays the live stream beside her “I present to you, Miss’s Tobin Heath” 

“I can take it from here” I whisper as I place my hand on her shoulder and pull her back. Her expression is of shock and relief as I smile at her. 

“You’re back”

“And you’re here” I joke as I straighten out my shoulders “Thank you” I mouth to her as I tap my right ear and push the stage door open, ready to walk up on stage. 

The clapping begins as the camera catches the first glimpse of me. While they are loud, the only thing I hear is the sound of her heart. It beats quick and uneven as gets a first glimpse at me in a month. The first person to stand is no one other than Carli. Within two seconds, everyone is standing as I reach the host and shake his hand. 

“It is a pleasure” Finick, one of the more famous show host greets me 

“It is mine” I reply as I let go of his hand and face the audience. My eyes meet hers causing her breath to hitch causing the corner of my lips to rise. Her eyes burn into mine, in heated passion, her emotions clear on her face. _She loves me._ Is all I think as I smile at her and her watery eyes smile back at me. 

“Thank you” I address the crowd with a bow of my head. 

“Now that’s a home welcoming” Theo cracks in my ear causing me to chuckle under my breathe and roll my eyes. The host gets the crowd to sit and I wait for everyone to be seated before taking a seat on the nice arm chair they provided for me. 

“How’s that for a greeting” Finick addresses me 

“One of the best, I’d say” I smile as I take a deep breath and adjust so that I’m comfortable in my seat. 

“Well, it sure is good to see you alive” 

“Wasn’t quite ready to leave this place you know” I reply with double meaning causing the oblivious crowd of media, writers, fans and civilians to laugh while my friends simply giggle. 

“We hope you never do” Finick smiles before getting started “So tell us, what have you been up to? Since the fall of the forces, there has been much speculation on what is to go on from here on out. What we know as fact is that you are not apart of the world leaders, is that right” Finick pauses to allow me to reply. I move in my seat a little to straighten out my posture a little. _I see that we aren’t easing into the hard questions, alright._

“Yes, that is correct. I am not apart of the world leaders” I confirm. A few ‘awh’s’ can be heard through the crowd as Finick gives me a tight smile. 

“Were you not voted to be apart of it or was it a decision of yours” 

“When the world leaders were elected, I wasn’t in the clearing to make any decisions. So I guess you could say it was a little of both” 

“Would you join if asked” 

“No” I reply a little too quickly as Theo snaps at me in my ear. 

“Don’t be so quick” Theo reminds me as I feel Rampone’s eyes on me in the crowd “Just take a deep breath” He advices me. 

“And why not” I take a moment as to ponder Finick’s question. 

“I can be a little impulsive, they need grounded, hardheaded people” I sigh as I think of the truth behind my reply. 

“So like Carli” Finick replies causing me to chuckle and glance at Carli whom rolls her eyes in the second row. 

“Yeah, basically” I reply with a smile. 

“This brings me to the first audience question” Finick directs my attention to a man around the fifth row to my left. 

“Go ahead” I address the man

“My names Jordan and my question is, if you’re not apart of the world leaders, than what is your role in society aside of being the designer of the new bridge” I nod my head and repeat his question in my head before standing and walking towards the left side of the stage. 

“Jordan, hey, nice suit” I begin, a little nervous as I hold the microphone in my hand “Um, as of right now, my roll in society is much like yours” I pause as I shake my head trying to form honest responses “I get up every morning, greet my friends and family, grab some food and head out the door. Every day is different. Every day is a new challenge. But as of now, my role in society is to try. Whether that be big or small, it doesn’t matter, what matters is that I’m trying to make a difference” Jordan takes a seat and the light moves across the crowd to a women. 

“My names Janet and my question is…why aren’t you the commander”  The spotlight leaves Janet and falls on me. I swallow hard and take a moment. 

“Again, I was not present in the time of elections” I reply with a dead voice. Of course, that doesn’t stop the follow up questions. 

“Are you happy with the election”

“Does the commander come to you for advice”

“Is Miss Morgan fit to be the Commander” 

“Settle down folks! Let her get some water” Finick exclaims to settle the crowd as I walk over to my chair to grab the glass of water they set out for me. As the water trickles down my throat, I close my eyes and remind myself that I am being watched. 

“Eyes on deck, four row” Theo points out. I place the glass of water down and look in the direction. _Didn’t take him long…fucker._ I think as Michael takes a seat in one of the rows not too far from Hope. I clear my throat and face the crowd. 

“Those…are all good questions” I begin as I pause to think of Jeri and if she’s watching. _She is watching._ I shake my head, suddenly lost at words, unable to talk without my feelings showing. _Maybe that’s what they need, maybe they need to see._  

“Miss Heath” Finick whispers as he covers his mic. 

“Right, um… At first I wasn’t happy with the election” I breath into the mic as I stare at the ground. The crowd falls silent as I continue to think “There was a moment where I was mad. It was more like a phase. I couldn’t understand why she was elected. Out of everyone I would think, why her, why Jeri… I asked myself. But then it came to me…Because it’s Jeri” I breath with so much emotion “So when you ask if she is fit to be commander, my answer is yes” I quickly pick myself up as I look into the crowd “I didn’t see it at first…but Jeri…she elevates herself. She doesn’t need me for advice. If anything, it is I that is in need of hers” I confess before clearing my throat and glancing at Alex. Instead of looking away, her eyes beam at mine. _She’s proud._  

“There you have it folks, no bad blood between The commander and Tobin. Lets move on, next question” Finick moves on. The questions presume to surround the subject of commander and the elections until someone brings up what actually happened. 

“Miss Heath, my name is Jacob, I come from Kanatos” 

“Good evening Jacob, what is your question” I ask as I straighten out my body and place the glass cup besides my chair. 

“What happened after the castings were cut? The last that we saw” 

“I know what you saw” I interrupt Jacob as I think back to what Ali told me “I know it is a subject of matter that is far more important to your region as it is to mine but it is not a subject I can’t talk about” I reply. Jacob’s face, along with many other Kanatos region attendees scrunch their faces in confusion and anger. 

“Settle down, everyone, please” Finick quickly rises from his seat as the commotion begins 

“It’s not because I’m not allowed to answer” I look at Jacob “It’s simply because it hurts” The room silences immediately and I glance at the TV knowing that Ali is watching “That’s right…you know after all these months, after everything, it hurts. It is all still fresh in my memory, I…It hurts to talk about it because all that crosses my mind are all the things that has happened for us to reach this point and I think of them, the people we lost and I” My throat closes as I think of Amanda and Laure. In order to stop the tears that well my eyes, I toss the microphone from one hand to another and look down at my feet “I miss them” I breath into the microphone as I suck in a gulp of air and then release it slowly “I’m sorry if that’s not a good enough response” I look at Jacob as I wipe a tear. Jacob offers a small smile and takes his seat. I’m given a moment to compose myself before the questions continue. Throughout the presentation, I feel myself growing more relaxed, the topics grow hard, all surround what has happened and what is going to happen, never of what is happening. _Of course, it’s not like they know much on the topic._

“Well folks we have come down to the last question. While I wish I could take the credit for it…it is a question asked by no one other than Tobin’s old squad” Finick speaks into my microphone. My eyebrows rise as I glance at them all sitting down before sitting up in my seat “Are you ready” 

“As I’ll ever be” I breathe out causing Finick to chuckle. 

“Alright well, in the words of your historical squadron… You have fought and sought for something we merely all dreamed. You made the lives lost your debt and paid it all up front. So our question is…What do you ‘owe’ yourself” Finick reads the card before setting it down. I stare at the card as it sits before me, dumbfounded by the question but shocked with my answer. Running my thump over the button on the microphone, I swallow the knot and bring it up close to my lips. 

“I owe myself…an apology” I answer with sincerity “I owe my body, heart, mind and soul an apology…for I have committed the biggest sin…and that is self abuse. I have torn myself to pieces, set myself on fire, have sacrificed everything without a thought of my being. There were mornings that I was so tired, mornings where even breathing was too much but I always forced myself up regardless of how bad it hurt. So I’m sorry that I never considered or took care of myself…but I’m not sorry for doing it” I pause to take a deep breath “Before we finish up here, I would like to address everyone. Whether it be here or at home…I just want you all to know that I won’t ever give up. No matter how much it hurts, no matter the depths or shades of black, I’ll be there, I’ll always be here, in person or…in spirit” I finished before turning the mic off. The room erupts into cheers of applause and whistles as I hug Finick goodbye and take a bow before the crowd. I gab my coat that was discarded halfway through the appearance and begins to head offstage. 

“And that…ladies and gentlemen…is how you come back from the dead” Theo complements me as I chuckle under my breath before turning off my ear piece and stopping in front of the doors backstage. 

“Keep your head up, but keep your alertness higher” I breathe to myself before stepping into a room full of the people I haven’t seen in weeks. 

* * *

As I step into the room, it’s Allie’s eyes I see first.  Her arms wrap around me tightly as I inhale the smell of her vanilla shampoo. _I’m safe._ I think as everyone voices zone out and all I can hear is intensity of my own heart. 

“I’m back” I breathe as my body catches up to reality and I squeeze my best friend. 

“Forever” Allie asks of me more than questions. 

“We’ll see” I reply as we slowly break apart. Allie wipes some tears as Jose quickly embraces me. 

“It’s so good to have you back”

“Thank you for taking care of her while I was away” I reply causing Jose to crack a big smile. One by one, everyone greets me with warmth and tight hugs. As soon as I get to Carli, I crack a big smile. 

“Your son of a” Carli cracks, unable to finish

“Thank you” I whisper as I squeeze her tight. 

“There’s nothing to thank…but thank you, for staying alive and coming back” Carli replies with a tight voice. 

“I promised remember… and it’s not like you gave me much option” I giggle referencing her move and bringing my clone from the states. 

“Yeah, well, can’t take all the credit myself” Carli confesses as we pull away. She shrugs her shoulders before moving to the side to unveil Alex. Time doesn’t go unused as I wrapped my arms around her tightly, opting to hold her and feel her close rather than kiss. 

“Tobin”

“Shhhh, I’m here okay, I’m here and thats all that matters” I interrupt her as her choked up voice breaks the silence “I’m here” I repeat once again as I slowly pull apart from her. 

“And my girl” I ask Carli 

“Asleep at home, she’s safe…confused but nonetheless safe” Carli informs me allowing my body and mind to relax. I look back at Alex whom smiles at me with tears in her eyes. Unable to stop the smile, I hug her once more before putting some distance between us. 

“So whats next…from this event” I ask Carli whom talks to some backstage people. 

“Tobin got the interviews and other things done before the events. All thats left is to talk and mingle with some of the directors and host and then we’re go to march” Carli informs me. I look at Christie whom looks at Hope, only to find her and Kelley in a tight embrace. 

“Take Sydney with you instead” I order 

“I’ll go” Christen quickly steps in for Syd. I look at her confused but she gives me a big smile “Just…trust me” She reasons. Unable to say no, I nod okay and watch them leave. Carli’s looks at me a bit confused but brushes it off to order some stage workers. 

“Miss Heath” A woman whom seems to be running the show backstage interrupts me with respect and halls me away to the room where all the directors and hosts are mingling. I’m not surprised at all to see Michael at the center of the room, a grin on his face. 

“Okay, so you’ll be here for quite a while so get comfortable and if you need anything I’ll be here, as well as Carli, Sydney and Becky” The woman informs me. At the mention of Becky’s name, I turn to see her walking in with Carli and I smile at her. She gives me a nod to inform me that the next step is completed before continuing her chat with Carli. 

“Thank you” I tell the woman and she nods. Grabbing a cup of what I presume is an alcoholic beverage, I drown it down and place it back on the table before beginning the long night. I keep my eyes on Michael throughout the backstage event but soon enough lose his sight.y.c  nn

“Don’t worry, he’s not far” Syd whispers to me as she joins my boring conversation with a Kanatos technology CIA. 

“Doesn’t mean he’s not doing damage” I reply with a sigh. Syd gives me a tight smile and shoulder squeeze. 

“I’ll be around, you hang on here” 

“Syd” I stop her before she can leave the room. She stops and looks at me. I want to say ‘be safe’ but know that she is capable of it. As she can sense my protectiveness, she replies ‘always am’ with a grin before leaving. I spend the rest of the night talking numbers and projects with the various amount of supporters and host and surprisingly don’t find them to be total snobs, with the occasion of at least 8 of them but for the most part, it wasn’t as bad as expected. 

“No worries, I did my best to limit how many snobs we got in here” Carli explains as we walk to our awaiting car. 

“You did good” I reply with a tired smile as we exit the building. The press goes nuts and flashes blinds me. Quickly I get into the car with Carli and take a seat by the window. The door shuts and we’re off. I stare into the dark night illuminated in colors for me. 

“A lots changed” I breathe as I look around. 

“We’ve been keeping the press busy with the projects” Carli explains. I nod and lay down on a row of seats and stare out the sun roof. 

“Tobin” Carli whispers 

“Yeah” 

“I know you’re tired and you’ll inform us of major details soon but…did you trace the bullets” She asks. 

“I tried, but…they weren’t trackable. I’m beginning to feel like Jeri’s hover crafts to Huros were brought down on purpose” 

“So you’re saying we’re not alone” Carli replies causing me to look at her. 

“Have we ever been” I reply. Carli opens and closes her mouth in deep thought before nodding no. I sigh deeply before looking up at the sky which still reeks of pollution. 

By the time we reach the safe house it is 3am and I’m exhausted. As I exit the car I take a look at the house and feel some discomfort that I can’t place. 

“Get everyone together” I order Carli. She rushes inside and I walk behind her slowly. My first instinct would normally be to walk to my office but I realize Frost is not here to object and that times are different. I opt to set my sweater on the stair railing and make my way to Alice’s room. I tiptoe through the hall in anticipation to see my little girl for the first time in what feels like forever. Slowly, I open her door only to see she is not there. _Where-_

“Momma” Alice’s tired eyes look at me from the other end of the hall, besides the bathroom. 

“Icy” I breathe as I rush over to scoop her off the floor. I hold her tightly against, not caring if she questioned why or figured out that something was off. 

“I’m so proud of you momma” Alice yawns as rests her head on my shoulder. My heart swells to know that she watch the event. 

“Thank you” I whisper as I begin to walk her back to bed. 

“Are we going to go on a bike ride tomorrow morning like you promised” Alice asks me as I lay her down. My heart drops at the news that Alice has been taught to ride a bike by someone else. 

“Yeah babygirl, we will” I whisper as I kiss her head goodnight and sit besides her bed, her hand in mine. She falls asleep within minutes of our shared goodnights leaving me in the darkness of her bright room. With ease, I remove my hand from her grip and stand up off the floor only to see now that she is wearing my ring around her neck.  The smile appears on my face as I walk out of her room and head to mine. As I bring up the scanner, I see that my rooms been broken into. _Alex._ Is all I can think as I push my door open to find everything except my pillows in the exact same spot at which I left them. Unable to be mad, I rearrange my pillows into the spots where I left them and head to the closet.  I change out of the clothes I’ve been in since yesterday and hop into an all black outfit. Rolling up the ends of my short sleeves, I fix my watch and head out the door. 

My hands slide above the main stair railing as it had millions of times before. As I hop off the last three steps, I land with ease. _It feels so good to be back in athletic shoes._ Feeling the comfort settle in just a tad bit, I move about the house, examining everything. 

“Tobin” My head turns to meet Alex’s eyes. 

“Al” I breathe as I rush to hold her. She takes in a deep breath and slowly exhales as I softly kiss her cheek. 

“I missed”

“Shhh lets not do this” I whisper into her ear as I pull her closer to me. She nods against me and we stand there but I see Carli come out of the elevator “Its time” I tell Alex as I pull away and take her hand, leading her to the meeting room. We let go of each other as we reach the doors of the meeting room but don’t lose each others step. Carli pushes the door open and everyone awaits for me. I walk over to the head of the table and ask everyone to take a seat.

“You must all be wondering what happened, what is happening and what will happen. As much as I would like you all to understand, there is not enough time to make sense out of everything. Our main concern is the next 48 hours. We have two days to prepare for the opening of the new homes in Axiom. That being said, we also have to prepare for the return of the ground commander. I applaud the move to bring Tobin and Hope from the States here but… they have to return home” I breathe. I look at Carli whom nods while others give me worried looks “ I know, I know nothing make sense but I will not risk lives more than I have to. They leave tomorrow night. My squad and I will personally, along with Tim, Pinoe and Carli, will be at the send off. I want everyone else here finishing and polishing plans for the arrival the commander and making sure that the project by our mates Christen and Alex. I wish I had more to say but it’s been a long time away and I would like to focus everything in small parts rather than larger. Everyone may go to rest now, there is much to tackle on” I finish before dismissing the room. Everyone stands slowly, confused but not looking for a fight as my tiredness is evident. Walking over to the small bar, I serve myself a glass of ice cold black solution that I have despised my whole life but have learned to tolerate more willingly. Bringing the cup to my lips, I take a small sip and turn around to find Carli, Abby, Tim, Allie, Becky and Christie still in the room.  Though I didn’t expect Alex to stay, it saddens me that she didn’t. 

“So, where do we begin” I ask the group as I continue to sip on the dark solution. 

“Maybe start with explaining” Abby half breathes as she takes a seat. 

“We came across dark agents and went into hiding, now we’re here, whats to explain” I reply slowly as I set my glass down on the table and rest my arms on the top of my chair. 

“Look Tobin, we know you’re hiding stuff form us but just explain how exactly we’re moving on from this? What exactly forced you into hiding and what the hell are we facing because from Scout to”

“I think it’s better if everyone focuses on the ground commander. There’s not much that can be done on our behalf now” 

“What are you saying” 

“What Tobin’s trying to say is that everything we can do has already been done. Now we wait” Becky answers for me as I let my head rest on my arms. 

“So we just wait and see if they attack?!” 

“They aren’t out for blood” I murmur into my arms 

“Tobs, speak up” Allie demands with a soft voice. 

“They aren’t out for blood. The dark agents, they’re seeking the past, not the future…it’s all a complete mess. Until our sources hack their systems we’re playing a chess game” I explain as I stand up straight and finish my drink “It’s better if we all get rest, we have to prepare for our farewell to our friends from the states and focus on the projects in Axiom. The sooner we can start reestablish the capital, the sooner we can access more of the past, now off to bed…everyone” I command as I leave the room. Quick feet follow me to the hall but no one boards the elevator with me, not even Allie. Once the elevator reaches the main floor, I walk out with my arms crossed and proceed to my room. 

My bedroom door bounces off the hall and I catch the handle in time to stop it from hitting me. Staring into the room, I realize I’ll get no sleep if I remain here. I quickly grab my bag and head out the door. 

The sunrises slowly as I walk to the cabin. It’s been used, by Alex, and I’m not surprised. _I left her and she clung to anything and everything that had my name on it._

When my back hits my bed, I groan. _Welp, it was worth a try._ I think as I slip to the ground and find it more comfortable. Tugging on a blanket, I wrap myself around it and wait for the morning to consume me. 

* * *

“Tobin” Alex whispers as she enters the cabin. I quickly rise to my feet and toss the blanket on the bed to make it seem as I had slept on the bed and not the floor. 

“In here” I yawn as I sit on the bed and let my face rest in my palms. 

“Did I wake you” Alex worries as she kneels besides me. 

“No, a lion never sleeps” I joke as I turn my face to get a look at her. I can’t stop the smile that forms as I look at her light ocean eyes. 

“What” She blushes as I stare. 

“Nothing” I whisper with a smile. 

“Liar” 

“Not lying” I reply with another yawn. 

“You didn’t get much sleep” She sighs as she cups my face, tracing her thump over my cheek. I press my cheek into her palm and close my eyes, nodding no. 

“Is there any way I can help” Her question is more of a beg. I can hear the desperation in her voice, the need to be close, the want to help. _But I can’t let that happen._

“No” I sigh as I stand, grabbing her hand and bringing her up with me. I place my hand at the curve of her neck and bring my lips to her head. I lay a gentle but long kiss before whispering ‘lets go’. 

We walk hand in hand in silence, letting our bodies radiate in happiness rather than to let our hearts speak our fears. As the house comes into sight, we let our hands go. 

“Has Alice awaken” I ask as I enter through the garage, quick to follow my morning routine of feeding the pups. 

“Soon” Alex replies. My smile drops when I see that the dogs have been feed “Tobin, other Tobin, fed them” Alex explains. _Of course she did._ I think as I let it go and walk over to my car, leaning against it. 

“Wheres you cat” I ask to differ myself from the jealousy inside. 

“Exploring” 

“I don’t understand how that doesn’t worry you…to have her leave and be okay with it” 

“I’m kind of forced to…not everything can be tamed” Alex replies a bit lowly, using her cat to express some of her emotions. I nod in understanding and hop off the car. 

“She’s awake” Allie yawns as she opens the garage door. I beam and quickly head to my little girls room. 

“Icyyyy” I chime as she runs into my arms. 

“Mommaaaaa, good morning momma” She smiles at me. 

“Good morning, ready to go out” I ask as she hops off my feet. 

“Yes!!!!” She screams causing me to giggle. 

“Will you help her get ready while I shower” I turn to Alex as Alice runs to the bathroom. 

“Sure will” Alex smiles. I quickly steal a kiss from Alex before rushing to get cleaned up. As I rush downstairs, I catch sight of Starlight and Ember waiting for me as they always had when I shower. 

“There are my pups, there you are” I half yell, half scream. Starlight runs straight to me, knocking me over with all her Husky power while Ember looks at me…as if noticing a difference. I wrestle with Starlight before stopping “Starlight, look, look, Ember no want to play” I coe as I hold her still to glance at Ember. Starlight takes a moment before licking my face. I roll off my back and spot Ember’s favorite toy in the corner. As if on cue, both Ember and I run to it. Of course, Ember being a crocker spaniel and all, beats me and we both tug on the toy like old times. I end up letting go and Ember jumps on me in victory before welcoming me back. 

“I missed you” I whisper as I hold both Ember and Starlight on the ground “So much” I breath as I inhale their shampoo. They lick my face causing me and another voice to laugh. 

“Well, they sure know who their momma is” Amy chuckles. My smile grows as I meet her eyes and immediately our arms wrap around each other. 

“It’s so good to see you” I exhale as her arms crush my body. 

“You’re taking as if you’re leaving again” She whispers. I sigh heavily knowing that the odds of my stay being long are short but still, I have hope. 

“Its possible” 

“Anything is” She says as we let go. 

“How’s Ryan” I ask changing the subject. 

“Great, more than great. He and Alice have spent a majority of their time together, he’s doing good in Kinder” Amy lets me know. 

“What?!” I half yell, unaware that my god son was already in school. 

“Yeah, just started two weeks ago” 

“Wow” I breathe both happy and saddened by the news. 

“Hey, don’t think too much about it…Tobin filled in your spot well” 

“Too well” I sigh under my breath.

“It was necessary” Amy reasons behind the decision to bring Tobin from the states here. 

“I’m not saying it wasn’t, I just wasn’t expected to be replaced” 

“Temporarily substituted” Amy corrects me

“I’m sorry, I’m just overwhelmed” I apologize as I take a seat on the couch. 

“Maybe you should see Doctor Emmett” Amy suggests as she places a hand on my left shoulder. I wince in pain causing her to retrieve it immediately. I’m quick to stand on my feet as she reaches for my arm. 

“Don’t”

“Tobin” 

“Just, don’t” I murmur as I leave the living room and head for the kitchen. I avoid eye contact with everyone, including Alex, as I pick Alice up and head straight outside. 

“Is everything okay momma” Alice asks as I set her down in the garage.

“Yeah Icy, why” I ask as I pull her bike out and set it outside of the garage and proceed to get mine. 

“You didn’t eat breakfast” she points out as she stares at me

“I wasn’t really hungry, now, how about that bike ride I promised” I smile at my little princess whom nods excitedly. We spend the morning going up and down the driveway in giggles until I begin to feel a little out of breath. I sit on the driveway and begin to watch Alice as she practices before me. 

“Worn out so soon” Allie’s voice rings as she takes a sit besides me and hands me a cup of the black solution. 

“Thank you” I reply as I chug it down and wipe my mouth “I never realized how much it takes out of you” I continue as I nod towards Alice. Allie chuckles freely making my heart throb but my lungs tighten. 

“Oh this is just the beginning…” She begins, her voice dying out as my thoughts begin to drown out her voice. While she meant no harm; in a way, it still hurt. _This is only the beginning._ I repeat to myself in my head. _This is just the beginning of what I can miss if all fails, this is just a beginning of how hard things will get._

“You know” Allie stops to confirm that I’m still listening 

“Yeah” I reply as I stare at Allie 

“I mean come on, she’s basically Amanda with a mix of you, her father-”

“Was in the forces” I interrupt Allie, giving her the same look I would give her when we would stand every Monday morning in Polemos, as Sepp read off the names of those who died in combat. 

“That explains it then” She replies not so thrilled. 

“But you’re right, she’s a whole lot of Amanda. The way her mother was so gentle” 

“Have you visited her tomb” Allie asks bringing the attention away from Alice for a second and back to me. I remain silent which answers Allies question. I’m not sure if it is disappointment, sadness or heartbreak that I see plastered on her face as she looks down to the ground and back up towards Alice. Though a feeling of need to explain fills me, no words come out. While nothing can reason why I haven’t visited Amanda’s tomb, not a single part of my body wants to even try to explain. 

Allie takes Alice inside to get showered and dressed for school while I head in to get ready for take off. Once I’m dresses and ready to go, I meet everyone out in the garage. Tobin and Hope from the states wait in the first car while Carli, Tim, Pinoe and my squad stand by. 

“Alright folks, quick send off, no complications” I order as I get into the vehicle behind the one Tobin and Hope ride in. The ride to Citadel is far longer than I remembered but soon enough find myself distracted as much as my select squad as we look at the reconstructions going on in daylight rather than in the dark like last night. When the cars stop in front of Polemos, I get out and walk to Tobin’s and Hope’s car and open the door. They both hop out and follow my squad inside.

It feels oddly weird being someone that used to be filled with so much…pain. I stare at place and reminisce on all the times I was here. I see that Becky and Syd do the same while Pinoe tries her best to keep her eyes forward. Tim on the other hand, watches me. 

“Don’t stare too long, I’m taken” I joke trying to ease my own nerves

“Right” He says with a light smile before walking ahead of me. As we arrive at the room that Abby and Hope have developed for smoother transcendence into the other world or portal as some within the squad are calling it, I signal Carli to turn it on. Taking the moment of waiting, I walk over to Tobin in some awkwardness. 

“I”

“You don’t have to do that you know, you don’t have to thank me for taking your spot” Tobin chuckles at me. I stare at her half puzzled because, _how,_ but also relieved because after all, we’re the same person, different background. 

“It’s not exactly”

“Tobin, come on, we’re the same person, I understand _exactly_ how you feel. I mean, if you were there, to teach my child how to ride a bike and I wasn’t…you bet I’d be upset, jealous and heartbroken, just as you are now. And while I know it was something that had to happen, I felt like I was robbing you from it, I robbed you from that experience and I’m sorry for that. I really am” Tobin looks at me with all the sincerity possible. My walls crumble and the tight feeling in my chest diminishes as she confesses her side “And I know theres no way to replace a moment but don’t doubt it when I say that it was as if you were there. Not just physically but emotionally, mentally…it was all you, hell, I was scared shitless. I come here, get told to act like a mother and boy never in my life did I ever think I’d have children… but Alice, she’s so easy to be a mother to. And I say that with the same feeling as you had going into this way before me. That little angel, she’s everything. And I am beyond blessed to have been given that first moment but never doubt that I felt as if I took it away from you, she’s your little girl, and only my trail run. I made sure to do exactly what you would do if that had been you in that moment, so while we know the truth, to that girl, it was you who taught her how to ride a bike, not me” Tobin finishes with a smile. I smile back at her and we embrace tightly. 

“Thank you, so much” I whisper as I hold her closer knowing that no one in the world feels me more than she does. 

“My pleasure, clone” She replies with a smile and we part. I shake hands with Hope and thank her for taking Hope’s spot while we were away. Becky and Syd help Tobin and Hope link up to the portal before I signal Carli to turn it on. I watch as Tobin and Hope stare at the machine as a light begins to spin in the middle of the opening and then it hits me.

“Tobin, wait” I yell over the portal causing her to look over at me. 

“Yeah”

“Where were you-” before I can ask, her body along with Hope’s, disappears into thin air and the machine turns off. _Next time._ I think to myself as I order the room locked and to head back home. The squad votes to get food for the journey and I find myself alone in the car with Becky, waiting for everyone to get back from inside Axiom perimeters. 

“I feel like walking” I blurt out of the blue feeling trapped inside the car. Opening the door, I step out of the car and walk around the new deserted parking lot roof we are located at. I find myself sitting on the edge when I hear Becky get out of the car and join me. 

“The air still feels” 

“Dense” I answer and she nods. She hits on the edge of the parking structure but never looks down, only ahead, past the valleys and dry mountains, dreaming of a world not too far from our horizon. 

“It feels so empty” 

“It does” I reply as I stare through the ruins and head up to Axiom 

“I guess we’re not the only ones still struggling” Becky and I continue to point out features of the environment until we fall silent. The light air bushes against our figures before continuing it’s away amongst ruins and deserts, reaching heights and places we’ve never touched. The sound of a car lets us know that its time to go home. The other truck with our friends appears and Becky and I head to our car. While I’m not one to turn down food, I leave half of my portion in the box and save it for later. I lean into the seat and find myself falling asleep on Becky’s shoulder. 

“Sorry” I yawn as I straighten out my back

“It’s okay, rest up, I’ll wake you up when we arrive” Becky reassures me. I don’t fight her as I feel my body’s weight consuming my every thought. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, looking through my things, I think I have another chapter, so three, yay!


	7. Interruptions (Part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy/Relax Chapter before everything really kicks off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, major writers block and then the never ending drama...
> 
> But funny story, I lost my debit card today...on my Boo's birthday... I cried for an hour. I felt horrible. Thankfully, I was able to use my information and using Apple Pay and well, sorta made up for having to cancel dinner plans with sushi. She liked her gift and she already knows I'l spend the rest of the year trying to make up for it. She's truly the best. Anyhow, I'm going to start writing the next chapter tonight, schools finally over so my hope is to get this done in a week, if not at most two. I will keep you all update!
> 
> Any funny stories you guys want to share? What have you all been up to?!

Interruptions Part 2

 

Becky kept to her word about waking me up and now I find myself in the kitchen with Alice working on homework. 

“Excuse me but this is ridiculous” I exclaim as I stare at a bunch of directions and worksheets we’ve been working on for two hours now. 

“Momma, it’s not that hard” Alice giggles at my frustration

“Here, let me try” Allie comes into the kitchen with Jose. I gladly stand up from my chair and let Allie sit down. She scans over the directions and quickly begins aiding Alice. 

“Show off” I mutter in defeat as I walk over to Jose who preps us snacks for the evening. 

“Struggling” Jose smirks at me as he breaks into a chuckle. 

“Hey now, why don’t you give it a try” I huff as I lean against the counter and pop some chips into my mouth. 

“Thanks but no thanks, my thing is marketing…not… that” Jose shoots a look at Allie and Alice. 

“What are you saying…you don’t want kids” I ask confused. 

“Oh no” Jose smiles “I do, but now is not the time” 

“Is there ever an appropriate time” I ask as I shoot him a small smile and look at Alice. He sets the last of the dirty dishes into the sink and wipes his hands before joining me. 

“I guess not” He smiles before sighing “Did you ever imagine being a mother” I’m not taken aback by his question but the feeling inside confuses me. _Did I ever imagine it? Did I ever even think of it as a possibility…_

“I didn’t even imagine that” I whisper as I glance at Alex who comes walking in with Kelley and Hope, laughing and enjoying their day off. 

“No one did” Jose smiles in the background as Alex and I meet eyes and melt within our bodies. I walk over to the het as Kelley and Hope move to the kitchen to talk with Jose. Our arms reach out at the same time and we connect our bodies. The hug is strong and different. It’s a hug filled of joy and anticipation, rather than of need and desperation. 

“Did you have fun” I ask as I inhale the sweet air of her neck 

“Yeah! It was good, your day” She replies full of happiness and tiredness all at once 

“It was…different” I reply with confusion but a warm feeling. She gives me a squeeze before letting me go. I hold her waist so that she doesn’t move away but give her space so we can look at each other. Though I have seen her eyes countless amount of times, its always as if it was my first time when we stare into the abyss of one another. We stay still for what feels like years until I slowly let her go and lead her to the kitchen. 

“Wooookkk, I’m done” Icy hops of her chair, waving the piece of paper with many erase marks in front of me. 

“Good job babygirl” I smile proudly as I pick her up and set her homework to the side “Now, how about some snacks with the family” I ask as she screams in excitement causing us all to laugh. 

* * *

 

I stare at Jose as he sways Alice in his arms and Allie sings a soft song for her.  The two focus all their attention on my daughter, their niece, as if she was their own. A bump to my head makes me tilt my head but my sight does not leave them. 

“Do you think their ready” Alex whispers causing me to look over at her. 

“Let me ask you this, was I ready” I look at her tentatively, watching for any sign of a dubious response. 

“Yes” She replies honestly with a small smile. 

“Then there is your answer” I reply before turning to watch Allie kiss Alice’s cheek and Jose watching Allie with a love so endearing that the tears well. _They are more than ready._

The night continues and soon enough Alice falls asleep.  Allie and Jose are quick to walk her up to bed while the rest of use continue to sip on our drinks. 

“Tobin, do you remember that time we wondered off from the pack and you near fell off the cliff” Pinoe giggles. 

“Oh gawd” I cringe at the memory “Boy do I remember” 

“Wait what” Alex eyes furrow as Hope’s do too 

“Yeah so when we were little, just starting at the academy, Syd, Tobs and I were all placed in the same quadrant for a morning run out in a replica battle zone.  Anyhow, it’s a group of 30, probs 40 tops but anyhow, we were running and lets be real, replica battle zones are pretty cool. Mornings runs? Not so cool” 

“So knuckle head 1” I point at Pinoe “And knuckle head 2” I point at Syd “Thought it would be a smart idea to wonder off”

“Oh gosh is this the time you almost died because of them two ” Allie giggles as she comes and sits next to me. I roll my eyes but nod yes causing her to laugh. 

“Well, anyhow, these two knuckle heads pushed us off the trail. I was not for the idea if I’m honest” 

“You didn’t scream for help either” Syd points out. 

“You’re not helping” I laugh “I didn’t want to be blamed for gearing off the trail. But thats besides the point! Not only did they force us off the trail but they made me lead” I exclaim 

“Oh shut it, you’re a natural born leader” Allie chips in with a shrug. I huff at my best friends unwillingness to help me out “Stop pouting at me and continue” She chuckles 

“Okay okay, so about a mile into the hike, we came across an area where the trees began to become less abundant, but the sight, it was like, staring into an abyss of light. We stopped all together more towards the edge of the cliff, and Pinoe being the child she is, decided it would be cool to just scare the crap out of everyone and fake slipping” 

“Hey now, I didn’t fake to slip” Pinoe jokes with a smirk 

“Whatever asshole” I laugh “I jumped and grabbed Pinoe, throwing her behind as I fell. I barely managed to grab onto the edge of the cliff” 

“She barely missed the boarder wall of the battle ground too” Syd points out causing Allie and Becky to shiver. 

“Board line? The walls you mean” Alex asks for clarification 

“Yeah, that was our first encounter with them” Pinoe responds 

“The buzz was barely there” I recall outloud

“Did you guys get in trouble” 

“No” I respond, “but Pinoe here had to work twice as hard from that day” 

“She put me through hell for a week and all I did was play a practical prank”

“That could’ve ended up killing Tobin” Becky points out

“Yeah yeah, lighten up, the girl is made of steel” Pinoe says before I feel a punch to my arm “See! She didn’t even flinch” I look at her with my mouth agape as I rub my shoulder. 

“Ouchhhh” I hiss as everyone laughs. We spend the night sharing stories of our up brings, never focusing on the bad parts, only focusing on the fact that we survived. 

* * *

 

“Well, I’m heading up now” Press is one of the last to head up, I stand up and hug her, before everyone wishes her goodnight. Glancing down at my watch I realize its 3am. _Alice will wake soon._

“I think I’m heading up soon” I whisper into Alex’s ear as she nuzzles into my side. She nods okay causing me to giggle. _She barely must be awake._ Without notice, I pick her up in my arms and give everyone a silent goodnight. Alex lets out a yawn before nuzzling closer into my shirt. _Gawd._ I think as I clench my jaw to keep from complementing her and waking her up. The walk to her room is rather harder that expected. My shoulder screams in pain but her gentle state screams to keep going. 

I slip her into bed and nearly gasp at the pain. Letting out a shaky breath, I lean down to kiss her head. My lips linger on her sweet skin for seconds, before I exit her room unnoticed. I stand by the edge of the stairs as my shoulder continues to throb. The despicable feeling of incompetence infiltrates my cells, burning my hope and consuming my thoughts. 

Deciding not to bother Becky with my pain, I make my way to Alice’s bedroom. Without making a sound, I walk over to her bed and sit down. I lean my back into her night stand a turn to brush the hair out of her face. I reminisce the soft gentle face of her mother and swallow hard. 

“Tell me what to do” I beg the silence as Alice takes a deep breath and presses her cheek into my hand. I trace her cheek with my thumb and let my worries float in the air “You remind me so much of your mother” I finally whisper, unable to stop the choke of tears. Alice’s deep sigh makes me break as I let my head fall on my knees and I cry silently. Rather than feeling like I couldn’t save Amanda, I simply feel her loss. _I miss her._ It is true. Amanda was a rock, a friend but most of all, a mother. She taught me so much about the peace of mind and showed me the unseen. Now more than ever, I missed her good sight. 

“Goodnight my little Icy” I finally sigh. Kissing Alice’s head, I make my way out and walk to my bed. I allow myself to drift off to sleep in part because of the days to come, as well as the emotions inside. 

When I wake, I’m still in the clothes from the day before. I sigh knowing how intense today will be. Nevertheless, the numbers on the clock give me some ease. _Only 4:50, ten more minutes of sleep._ I yawn with purpose before settling back and closing my eyes. Instead of darkness, I am met with discomfort. Unable to shake the feeling, I get out of bed and head for the shower. Its quick, quicker than intended. 5:15am. Heading to my closet, I quickly change into my outfit. Fitted black sleek slacks that stop right before my ankle, a loose half button down shirt that remains untucked. The sleeves of the shirt end at my elbow making me seem a bit more fashionable than usual. I go to grab the black loafers set out for me but instead opt for black, laceless athletic shoes. _Well, I’m already making a fashion statement,_ I reason. 5:25am reads the clock. _Just in time._

I head out of my room and downstairs to the secure meeting room. As I enter the room, I see the world leaders whom look a little surprised to be there.

“She volunteered to run security during tomorrows Axiom opening, and… this is her property so” Carli’s voices explains. Everyone nods and looks forward. I opt to stand at the back of the room and watch the meeting. It’s all mainly surrounded on the commander, tomorrow’s event and sometimes me. Everyone does a good job pretending I’m not there, which I appreciate. Once the meeting concludes, some of the world leaders greet me on their way out, others bow and some glare. I do my best to shrug them off until the room is empty, leaving only Becky, Abby, Carli and I. 

“Quite the outfit you have on” Becky glances at me

“Had to make an impression” 

“Right” 

“Is everything ready for tomorrow” Abby gets straight to it

“Good morning to you too” I grin as I grab my cup of coffee and walk towards the smart table. Turning the lights off, I maneuver through the settings with my hands and pull up the general security check points and stations set for tomorrows grand opening of the first homes in Axiom.  

“That’s some heavy security” Abby ponders 

“Is it heavy enough” Carli asks

“Seems to be reasonable” Becky adds with shrug. 

“You know, I think this is enough” I look at Abby before glancing at Becky, then back at Abby. 

“Are you sure” Carli asks as she examines many angles. 

“Please don’t question me” I respond respectfully. Carli nods and closes the tabs. 

“Well then, Kelley, Hope along with Syd, Press and Alex will be heading out soon, I suggest you gather your squad members and run over whatever needs to be done today” Carli informs me catching me by surprise. 

“Where are they heading out to exactly” I ask as I fold my arms and frown at the new details. 

“Press events and interviews, for tomorrow” Abby answers as she heads for the door

“And I wasn’t informed because…” 

“Because everyone knows how you get about a certain brunette” Carli snickers as she brushes past me. I hold the urge to roll my eyes in and proceed behind everyone. We board the elevator and head up. As the doors open, Abby exits and makes her way out to find her wife while Carli finds her husband and Becky heads up the stairs. I see that everyones rushing around getting ready to do there things. I step out of the elevator, finding her eyes immediately, but losing my breath completely. Her smile is radiant, brighter than I could ever remember, and her skin is glowing, for the first time since, well, since a long time. Her hair lays to her right shoulder, in a loose, low pony tail, with the ends curled. Her white dress brings out her color, and complements her sandals. We don’t say a word as we meet in a tight embrace. I hear her chuckle and pull away to smile at her. 

“Whats funny” I whisper, too in love to speak

“This, you…our outfits” She chuckles not making sense “The dinner, the weekend dinner, you wore white and I black, but look at us now, I wear white and you wear black” Alex explains causing me to smile at the memory. Smile at the way the butterflies that night stirred chaos in my mind. 

“Have you eaten yet” I ask, as I glance down at my watch and see that it’s 6:30am. 

“Not yet, they are hosting a breakfast for us there” 

“Okay good” I breathe as I pull her back into me. She smiles against me as I inhale deep. 

“I love you” I whisper as I close my eyes. She squeezes me tighter before whispering it back. We stand in our tight embrace for a while longer before pulling away. I catch Hope and Press in the corner of my eye and give Alex a soft smile. 

“I’ll be right back” I whisper before kissing her forehead and slipping past her. Catching up to Hope and Press, Kelley sighs and walks towards Alex. 

“Here, lets go outside” I whisper as I open the front door and let them walk out first. Closing the door behind me, I take a deep breath. 

“How’s the hacking coming” I ask Hope

“It’s going” She replies without much enthusiasm. I give her a look of explanation “It’s just, we used his credentials which worked but we still are missing one thing. It’s some sort of phrase…but don’t worry, Theo is working on it” 

“Phrase” I ask confused. 

“Yeah, we don’t know what it is and it’s not like we can bring him in again” 

“Right, right… Let me ask around” I tell her “Chris, how’s everything for the media day” 

“It’s all planned and will be executed to the last nub, don’t worry, with Hope and Syd, it’ll work out”

“Good” I smile at them. I get a notification on my watch that the large SUV’s taking them to Axiom have arrived here. 

“Its time to go” I tell them as I walk to the bottom of the walkway and wait for the SUV to come to a stop.     Everyone begins to come out and head towards the cars.  One by one, I help them in.  The last one being Alex of course. 

“Give Alice a good morning kiss for me” 

“I will” I smile as I lean in to kiss Alex’s head. She smiles at my move, and proceeds to get in. Closing the door behind her, I tap on the car and watch them go off. Waiting till the cars are out of the vicinity, I walk back inside. 

“Ready to go” Kelley pipes as I close the door. 

“As soon as-”

“I’m here” Allie huffs as she comes down the stairs. Kelley and I burst into fits of laughter seeing that my best friend was in such a rush she forgot to straighten the back of her hair. 

“Here, put it up” I giggle as I hand her a hair tie.  She huffs in defeat before looking me up and down. 

“What”

“Nothing, you look good” She smiles before reaching to fix my hair. 

“Thanks” I beam. We load up into Kelley’s car and head out. Amy had asked to take Alice for the day which ultimately landed me to come along with Kelley for pre-popping the question shopping with Allie. 

The day goes rather smooth. I nod my head yes or no, depending on what I believe Hope will like. Playing the part as a friend knowing damn well that Hope was also on the verge of popping the question. 

“Hey, now that the squirrel is asleep, want to tell me whats going on” Allie asks as she reaches over to turn off the music. I glance back and see Kelley sound asleep. Sighing to myself, I shake my head. 

“I don’t know” I start. Allie doesn’t move, hearing the sincerity in my voice. She sits still, unmoving, giving me time to word it together “Things are just, not what they seem. I once thought that I knew it all, that I had lived through just about everything but now, I feel like I knew nothing. We lived through oblivion all our lives and now we find out that, that we’re possibly not alone and that theres alternative worlds or whatever they are, I still don’t fucking know but it’s just, hard to come to terms with” I huff feelings stuck. Allie nods besides me before reaching over to grab my right hand. She traces the black ring on my pointer finger, making me inhale deep. A guilt hits me hard but I manage to continue looking forward while driving. 

“Does Alex know” Allie asks as she slips the ring off my hand, almost making me whimper. 

“I had it on this morning, I’m not sure if she noticed or not” I answer. Allie nods her head in understanding before slipping the ring back on my pointer finger. I take my hand back and trace my thumb over the ring, adjusting it back to it’s correct rotation. 

“Why” Allie suddenly asks. I turn to look at her, to confirm that she really wants to know. 

“I’m going to break her heart” I say out loud for the first time. Really taking it all in that I will cut Jeri loose as soon as everything is over. 

“Tobin” 

“And I feel, so so horrible about it” My voice dies out as I do the best to hold the tears

“Tob”

“No don’t Allie, don’t. Don’t tell me it’s okay because it’s not. She loves me, with all her heart and soul. And it crushes me that I can’t love her the way I once did okay? I loved her Allie, I really really did and now, with my memory getting better and the emotions resurfacing I know that I love Alex. But it fucking hurts okay? I am hurting her and you know the worst part of it is? That she lost me to her sister. That’s what kills me” I finally pull over and begin to cry “It just had to be Alex didn’t it” I cry into the steering wheel letting the truth come out. Allie doesn’t try to move nor speak. She simply waits. And I thank her for it, as when I am able to breathe, I turn to look at her, “I love Alex, Allie. I’ve never been more sure of it but dear lord, does it hurt to know that Jeri will be forced to watch us. Be forced to watch me love someone else…And so I wear the ring because of guilt. Because I will have to hurt yet someone else that I love. And I’m sorry if that is unfair to Alex but it is also unfair to Jeri that I never fully gave her the chance she deserved” I finally end. Allie closes her eyes and sucks in her lips, trying to figure out how she feels about it. 

“Would you have married Jeri” She asks 

“If things had gone differently, possibly” 

“Then it’s okay to wear the ring” Allie softly smiles. I close my eyes and inhale deep. Nodding to myself, I turn the car on and begin the drive home. Roughly thirty minutes later, Kelley wakes up and forces us to make a pit stop. Pulling into a parking spot on the road, we get out of the car and head into a small shop. 

“Excuse me, do you have a restroom my dear friend could use” I ask a women behind the cashier as gentle as possible. At first, she doesn’t recognize me but a few seconds later, her head nods and she points to the back. I offer her a gentle smile before rolling my eyes at Kelley. 

Allie and I split up and begin to scan the store, looking for something to munch on while we’re here. I walk through the issues, nothing much catching my attention besides dried fruits and some vitamins. Heading to the front, I see Allie is paying for some things. 

“What’d you find” I ask as I stand behind her. 

“Some canned fruits and goodies, some of Jose’s favorites and some ingredients for baking” Allie beams excitedly, making me smile. 

“Sweet” 

“Here’s you change” The cashier hand Allie, whom takes it and drops it into the jar as she always does. 

“Thank you” Allie smiles before taking her paper bag and walking outside and sitting on a small bench. Placing my things on the table, the girl begins to total everything up as Kelley approaches me. 

“Whatcha buy me” She wiggles her eyebrows causing me to giggle. 

“Some dried fruits” 

“That’s it” She whines like a small child. 

“I wasn’t too sure how hungry you were” 

“Umm, it that even a really concern though, I’m always hungry” Kelley responding causing the girl behind the table to giggle. 

“I guess it is not” I reply “Could we get three mixed berry scones” I ask eyeing the pastries behind the counter “Actually, how many do you have” I ask as I move my head aside to look at the plate. 

“Umm, about nine” the girl replies

“I’ll take all of them” I reply. Of course, neither Allie, Kelley or I need three scones each but knowing damn well the drought of money and supplies around this area, the girl and whom ever else works here needs the money, so I can’t help but feel like $65 is not enough for dried fruits and vitamins. 

“Are you sure” The girls voice just above a whisper asks. Not only must she be in shock that I am dead serious about buying nine scones that are each about the same cost of what she gets paid an hour but in shock that I am bluntly in front of her now. 

“Yep, and… I’ll take a loaf of bread” I smile. The girl nods before gathering the pasties and bread and ringing up my total. I hand her cash and the minute she hands me my change, I put it into the tip jar. 

“Thank you” I smile before handing Kelley a bag to carry and waving goodbye. 

“Do you always do that” Kelley breathes as we reach her car. 

“What? Buy vitamins? Usually” I shrug my shoulders as I place the bag of scones in the back and get behind the wheel. 

“No, buy things you don’t exactly need and tip… a lot” Kelley asks as if amazed. Allie sadly chuckles besides me and I sigh. 

“I take it you barely ever left Axiom” I ask as I put the car into drive. Kelley nods no and I bite my lip. Allie’s eyes rim my tight lip smile, reading my thoughts of disappointment. Through we have come far physically from times before, where Axiom and the rest of the region were separated. We have barely come a step away from the notions of the old world. _We have been so busy on rebuilding that we forgot to renovate the image and reality, we pointed at the problem but never addressed it._ I think as I glance at Kelley in the back whom munches on the dried fruit. _Here she is, understanding and supporting of what we are doing yet, personally she has failed to see why we did it truly._ ** _She didn’t fully understand._** The last thought haunts me all the way home, and on Allie too for that matter. As we arrive at the safe house, I see the Alex and the rest still aren’t home, but Amy is just now pulling up. 

“Mommaaaaa” Icy yells as she catches sight of me. 

“Alice” I smile as I pick her up and wait for my nephew whom comes crashing behind her “Ryannn” I sing as he squeals Auntie into my ear. 

“How was my little babies day” I smile at Amy whom walks over and kisses my cheek. 

“Busy, we went to the park and Alice and Ryan rode their bikes around before going to a literature group and then getting food and watching a movie” 

“Oooo what books did you guys read” I ask as I set both Alice and Ryan back down on the book. 

“A bunny book” They both yell simultaneously making us all giggle. 

“My gawd they are the cutest” Allie huffs as she watching them hold hands and run off to find Ember and Starlight. 

“You raised a good one” Kelley compliments as she carries down the bags of treats. 

“oh hey, that reminds me, I know how much work Alice can be and Ryan so I bought the fam some got all scones” I smile as I had Amy the bag. 

“Tobin” Amy smiles with humbleness as well as cringing knowing just how much they are. 

“Don’t start, I appreciate everything you’ve been doing for my little girl and I know how much Ryan and you love them” 

“Thank you” Amy sighs as she hugs me. 

“I’m going to start taking things inside before Hope gets home” Kelley waves Amy goodbye before taking a few bags to hide. 

“So, she’s really going to propose” Amy asks as she walks besides Allie and I to see outside at a table and watch over Alice and Ryan whom roll around with the pups not too far from us. 

“Not before Hope” I giggle knowing just too damn well that Hope will be popping the question before Kelley. 

“I can’t believe you’re leading Kelley and Hope on” Allie laughs as I grin. 

“Oh you can’t tell me it’s not funny” 

“She has a point, watching the two knuckle heads scramble around” Amy supports. Allie simply giggles in disbelief before silence sets upon us. We watch Ryan and Alice play tag with the pups before we hear a meow. Looking down at the ground, I meet eyes with Themelio. 

“Oh fuck” I react, unsure why but I do. 

“Hahaha it’s a cat” Amy giggles as she extends her hand to pet it. 

“I know I just forgot it existed” I breathe before Allie smacks me

“It’s your girl’s cat, how could you forget” Allie pretends to be mad causing Amy to laugh. 

“ITS A CAT” I huff with a chuckle 

“My gawd you have no mercy” Allie playfully rolls her eyes before petting the cat whom is now on the table soaking in the attention. 

“Cats…so…odd” I think as I watch it rub its head into Allie’s hand. 

“It’s cute” Amy compliments the thing, earning a purr as if it knew what she was saying. 

“Its something” I reply cause them both to roll their eyes

“Talking about your girl, guess they are here” Amy nods towards the pathway as we watch three large black SUV driving toward the house. None of us get up to move as the SUV park, rather we just continue our small talk until the girls approach us. 

“Hey there little guy” Alex beams at the sight of her cat whom immediately goes to her and nuzzles into her. 

“The darn thing still lives” Hope asks surprised 

“See, I’m not the only one” I yelp causing Press and others to laugh

“Where’s my nephew and niece” Syd asks as she searches for the kids. As soon as she spots them, she rushes over to them and embraces them. 

“The girl needs a child of her own, like now” Hope points out

“I think she might actually be waiting…” I think out loud causing some eyes to glare at me. Fuck not everyone knows. 

“What did you say” Hope asks

“Nothing” I quickly swallow as Amy cringes. 

“Wow, Tobin’s hosting a reunion and didn’t invite” Pinoe fakes being hurt while Becky and Carli shake their heads. 

“You can’t sit with us” Allie jokes causing to laugh. 

“Oh shut it, I didn’t come for you hunny, I came for this beast” Pinoe looks at me and begins to lean into me. Before I can react, she picks up Themelio and she turns to me “Oh, did you think I was talking about you” She winks at me causing me to blush and everyone to laugh. 

“How did everything go” Carli asks Alex and Chris

“Exhausting” They both answer before laughing

“It’s been a lot of hard work but finally it’ll all pay off tomorrow, and it really couldn’t have been done without Alex” Chris thanks Alex. 

“Don’t even, you are all brains”

“But your designs, don’t sell yourself short, they’re amazing” Chris smiles as she gives Alex’s shoulder a squeeze. Alex’s cheeks blush and we all smile. 

“Are you guys prepped” Amy asks me

“As far as I’m concerned, yes” I reply as I look over to find Pinoe with Syd, playing with the kids. 

“It’ll all run smooth” Carli confirms. We crack jokes and relief some stress of tomorrow before Abby arrives. 

“Funs over guys” Pinoe whispers under her breathe reminding all of us in the squad of the old times. 

“Very funny” Abby rolls her eyes. 

“Lighten up Wambach, I thought your time here would’ve made you…more versatile” Amy takes a crack

“She’ll crack someday” Syd snickers. I giggle at the comments until I realize how uncomfortable Abby and Alex look under the gentle fire. 

“I think i’s best we head inside and rest, tomorrow will be another milestone” I interrupt as I get up. Allie glances at me both in disbelief yet understanding. 

“Tobin’s right” Amy cuts loose. We head inside and get set for dinner. Alice and I never skipping a beat. 

“So, do I get to go tomorrow” Alice asks suddenly. I stop cutting the pizza and pop her onto the counter. 

“I haven’t decided” I reply with honesty as I pick the knife back up. 

“Do I get a choice” 

“You know I have never belittled your desires” 

“I want to go” She informs as I had imagined. 

“I will consider it” I reply with a gentle smile. She nods and hops off the counter and rushes off to Ryan. 

“Will you consider it” Allie looks at me. I shrug my shoulders before returning my attention to the pizza. 

By the end of dinner, I’ve gone through roughly 56 different scenarios, all of which nothing ends right. 

“I think its time to get rest” Alex tries to snap me out of my head but it doesn’t work. 

“You head on up, I’ll be here when you wake” I whisper back before kissing the side of her head and leaving my plate in the sink. I walk to my office and sit down on the couch. Unable to contain my emotions, I walk over to the hidden wall compartment and pop it open, I retrieve my pen and journal and walk over to my desk. I trace the outside cover, remembering the first time I laid eyes on it. Remembering all this journal holds and holding back the tears it brings me. I flip it open to the next new page, and let my pen ink the page. 

 

_Entry 298_

_Theres so much going on that there is no time to heal. Many will get hurt, it’s a given, the hardest part is managing who should be best prepared for the pain and those who are left to survive. I wish I could avoid it, avoid hurting them, but I know there is no way around it now. There’s too say but not accurate nor worthy enough words to express all that I feel. But if there was one word that rims just the slightest of what I feel, it would be: everything._

 

Closing the journal, I walk back to the compartment, place the journal and pen inside and glance down at the ring. My heart tells me to remove it but my mind won’t allow for the movement. Closing the compartment, I walk to the couch and lay down on it. Pondering just what else there is to this world I still don’t know about. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty relaxed chapter! Any guesses?


	8. Interruptions (Part 3)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And so it happens...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, got caught up with a new job, my second job and a bunch of other stuff but I was writing the entire time, in breaks and whenever I got home! So here it is, hopefully in less than two weeks I'll have the next chapter!

Interruptions (Part 3) 

As her eyes pierce into mine, piecing it all together, putting events into line, my heart drops. The weight of it all falls, theres no secrets, no lies, nothing but her eyes conflicted with mine. Wondering if I had always lied… _I didn’t. I swear I didn’t lie about loving you._ I want to scream but my mouth doesn’t open. If anything, I feel enclosed. And I simply watch, as she shakes her head and goes.

* * *

 

**13 Hours Before…**

I jolt awake at 3 am. The dry sweat covering my body makes me itch and want to scream. Opting to keep silent, I get up from the couch in my office and stretch, feeling knots all over. _Great._ I curse under my breath and begin to head for the door. I make sure the halls are silent before exiting and rushing to my room. I grab what I need and head of the door, not a look behind. 

When my feet meet the cool water, I breathe in deep. _Free._ Without consideration, I remove my clothes except for my sports bra and undies before diving right in. The still peace of the water enlaces my body in ecstasy and ease. Cleaning my pores and relieving me from fears. In this moment, its just me and the beauty of life. As I resurface from beneath the water, I look up to the sky to see the small glimmer of stars, just faint as the sun begins to rise far east but just enough to make the edges of my lips curl. _How beautiful is it to be this small._ Swirling in the lake, I get lost with its freedom and acceptance. It doesn’t think or do, it simply exists without knowing how beautiful it is. Diving back into the fissure of the lake, I get lost. 

Resurfacing, the sunrise illustrates a picture with tints of golds and red, scattered around me, intoxicating me with good feelings. I look at my watch and see it’s 5am, and that I’ve burned half of the calories I was supposed to burn throughout the day already. _Well…there goes that._ Taking one last dip, I swim to the edge and begin to get out. I pick up my clothes and opt to put on my sandals, wrapping my body in the towel I grabbed earlier this morning. Beginning my walk to the cabin, I move my shoulders, feeling the strain in my left shoulder that has healed for the most part. 

“Nothing I can do now” I sigh to myself as I reach the front of the cabin, I remove my slides and scan my hand. The door opens and I quickly slip in before flicking the door shut and heading towards my room. I discard my clothes by the bedroom door and head towards the shower.  The warm water shocks my body in all the right ways. I stand underneath the warmth loving ever second of it. Lost in the feeling, I feel a pair of arms wrap around me and immediately breath in deep as her front presses against mine. 

“Al” I barely whisper as the water coats her bare body. 

“I knew I’d find you here, and don’t worry, my eyes are closed” She yawns causing small butterflies in my stomach. The intimacy of the moment is a little much, more than I would’ve liked but her gentle rise and fall of her chest against my back assures me that it won’t go farther than this, yet. 

“Is everyone awake” 

“They are starting to, I just wanted to say good morning” She explains through another yawn. 

“Well Good Morning Alex” I say while turning around. She is indeed standing with her eyes closed. While I could take advantage of her blind, I keep my eyes over hers and lean in to kiss her forehead. She sighs into before opening her eyes to meet mine. I smile and lean in to kiss her. She meets me half way. It’s gentle and soft, like always. When we part, she keeps her eyes closed and hums. 

“I’ll let you to it” She whispers as she begins to get out. I want to stop her, ask her to stay but I know now is not the time, both emotionally and mentally. Instead, I reach to grab my robe and help her into it as she keeps her eyes closed for me. I guide her with my words out the door and once she’s gone, I go back to showering. Once finished, I dry my body and wrap the remaining towel around my body and walk to my wardrobe. 

I take the preplanned attire and set it on the bed before walking to the drawers to grab fresh underwear and a bra. _Ugh, I hate bras._ I groan as I slip it on. Rolling my eyes, I open a hidden compartment to grab a thin protective vest. I slip it on and tighten the straps before walking over to grab a hidden medical kit Becky and Ali made for me. Taking a vial and needle, I count to three, before plunging it into my diamond and cursing to myself. After 15 seconds, I remove the needle with a moan and discard of the evidence. Hiding the medical kit, I move my shoulders and see that the strain in my left shoulder is barely there. _Thank you._ Letting out a huff, I walk to my bed and grab the navy blue silk like button up. Stopping just above my chest, I grab the fitted navy blue pants that are stripped if you look close enough. I tuck the button up into the pants and reach for the fitted wool bomber jacket that is navy blue too. I put it on and walk over to the mirror to see my hair settling into it natural state. 

“I should probably straighten it” I think out loud. Doing a minute debate, I opt to do so. It’s not long before I’m slipping on the complementing heels of the outfit and walking out the door. 

When I reach the safe house, it’s 6am. Instead of greeting my little angel, I head straight down to the command room. 

“Mooooorrrnnnning” Syd chimes with a smirk at my attire. 

“Oh have fun with the heels” I roll my eyes. In order to hide the thin protective vest, Syd had to opt to dress me in a suit but forced the heels on me for revenge. 

“I still think those are a bad idea” Theo yawns as he comes in wearing a dark maroon suit and thin black tie. 

“Thank you, I thought the same” Hope enters wearing a suit and heels along with heels like me. Syd begins to laugh and all of us roll our eyes. 

“Alright, a minute please”I tell the agents working on the computers and holograms. They exit the room leaving my select four and I alone. 

“Door” I command Syd whom locks it and secures it. 

“Phone” I ask Hope whom works on the computer. 

“Ready” 

“Okay, ring her up” I command as I stand in the middle of the room, staring at the screen before me. Ali and Nadine pop up. 

“Well thats a sight I never thought possible” Ali laughs as she looks at Hope and I in heels. 

“Syd, right” Nadine asks with a grin

“Yeah yeah, she got her way” I roll my eyes “How’s everything” I ask 

“Good, we are good, no signs of activity, everything looks good” Nadine gives me an update “I will send the data now” She replies before disappearing behind the camera. 

“I’m reciveving it” Hope yells down at the first floor. I nod and look at Ali. 

“Are you okay” 

“Yes, I am, thank you for asking” 

“And…” I ask without mentioning 

“Good, all good here” She smiles. 

“Vitals and all” Becky asks, her doctor instincts kicking in, causing Ali to smile. 

“Yes Becky” She chuckles

“Good good, just checking” Becky blushes

“No worries, and you guys, is everything ready” Ali asks. I look at Hope and Theo whom nod. Syd next and then Becky. 

“Seems so” I confirm. 

“Good, I’m relieved to hear that” Ali smiles. 

“Well, I just wanted to check up, we’ll call soon. Take care” I wish her well before hanging up and nodding Syd to open the door for the other agents. We exit the command room and head for the board room. It’s only 6:43am when we enter the room. _Perfect, we are on schedule._

* * *

 

“Are we ready” I ask Carli as I enter the room. All world leaders are seated, with Carli at the head of the table. 

“Now we are, thank you for joining us” 

“No prob” I shrug as I take my seat, followed by Theo, Hope and Becky. 

“Well, now that we are all present, we may begin” Abby begins 

We go through details, voting, problems, concerns, solutions and resolutions centered and geared around many things. What surprises me most is that the events of today are mildly touched. 

“Finally, today is an important mile stone, as the first housing is to be opened in Axiom since…the revolution” Carli pauses “While…that is something to…celebrate, we must remember that we are still in war” 

“Is that why Tobin and ex squad members are here today” One of the world leaders points out

“Yes, Tobin and a few of the ex-squad members were assigned security for today’s event as they are the top trained guards we know” Carli lies to the world leaders with ease. 

“My concern is less of the event, but more of the presence of those in the event” 

“We can assure you sir, everything we can do is being done” Theo confirms 

“And the Commander, do we know if she is going to be in attendance? Her sister, after all, is one of the project directors” 

“There is no official word on that, but I expect Tobin’s team has planned for anything” Abby continues the lie 

“We are well set up” I nod. 

“Good, I believe that completes everything” Carli finalizes. The rooms lights come on and the holograms shut. Everyone rises and I look at my watch. _8:30am, always precise._ I stand from my chair and exit besides Becky. 

“How are you feeling” Becky asks, referring to my shoulder. 

“At the moment, I’m not”

“Good” She replies. I nod and continue into the elevator, my eyes centered at my feet. The elevator fills and we’re up. The door opens and I fix my jacket. Allowing everyone off first, I’m the last one off. Looking down the hall, I see blurs of black and colors running all around the hours. 

“It’s finally here” Amy’s voice brings me into focus. 

“It is” I breathe “I’ll be right back” I head up to my room and close the door behind me. Walking over to my closet, I unlock a drawer and grab a small box, inhaling deep as I do so. _Hopefully she loves it_ , I think as my fingers trace the edges of the box. Swallowing the fears, I close and lock the drawer before heading out to the hall. No one is upstairs, making me sigh in relief. _I want this to be between us only._

I head towards her room with nervous. _What is she doesn’t want this anymore? How is everyone going to react once they see? Jeri…_ I cringe at the thought but keep on walking. As I’m standing at her door, I look at the box once more. I knock slightly but hear no sound. _She must be still asleep._ I open the door slightly and see her curled up on her bed. _So beautiful._ I walk inside and close the door as soft as possible. When she doesn’t stir, I sigh in relief. I walk around her bed until my eyes lay upon her closed eyes making my heart pound harder. Kneeling at the side of her bed, I set the box on her nightstand before carefully brushing a few strands of hair away from her face. She begins to wake at my touch but nuzzles her cheek into my palm making me smile. 

“Morning” I smile at her as her blue eyes look into mine. 

“Good Morning” She yawns as she stretches her arms out. I giggle at her adorableness before my heart slows down and focuses on her smile. _This is the right thing to do._ I realize as I glance at the box. Mustering all thats left in me, I open my mouth to ask her.

“Al-” The door opens and my head shoots up to meet none other than the other blue eyes that hold my heart. _Alex._

“I’ll wait outside” She quickly shuts the door realizing she has interrupted the moment I was about to have with my daughter, Alice. 

“Momma, whats that” Alice asks as she looks at the box on her night stand. I let out a giggle before sighing. 

“Alice, would you like to be my plus one to Aunty Chris’s and God Mother’s big event” I ask. Alice’s eyes evolve from tired to surprise in a split second before my eyes. I have no time to react as she embraces me in a tight hug. 

“I would love to momma” She whispers into my ear. The fluttering of my heart compares to nothing as I feel her happiness radiate through our embrace and into my veins. Wiping away tears, I pull away. 

“In that case, this is for you my sweet Icy” I take the box on her nightstand and give it to Alice. 

“For me? But it’s not my birthday” She points out.

“Open it” I smile. She sits on the bed and opens the box to display a navy blue dress with small flowers, along with a new pair of white sneakers. 

“OH MY GOSH” She gasps nearly dropping the box, making me laugh. 

“Do you like it” I ask with a smile. 

“I love it Momma” She beams as she hugs me once again “Oh momma, I’m so happy” She begins to cry against me. 

“Hey hey, Icy, no crying my beautiful princess” I speaks softly. 

“I’m sowwwyy” She whispers as she composes herself. 

“Come on, lets get you bathed and ready” I smile at her and she returns the gesture. It takes us 30 minutes to get all ready but soon enough, my daughter and I are side by side. Her hand in mine, staring at our complementing outfits in her mirror. 

“I love it” She breathes. 

“Me too, but theres one last thing you have to put on before we go okay” I ask as I kneel in front of Icy.

“Okay Momma” 

“I’ll be right back, stand here” I say as I kiss her forehead and quickly leave the room. I find Hope and Theo, while I catch a glimpse of Alex sitting on the stair case. Hope and Theo enter the room and Alice stares at them a little confused. 

“Okay, so Hope and Theo made a little something for you” I explain. She nods and looks at Theo and Hope. They kneel down and help Alice open a box. As her eyes lay on the white crisp grey color of the leather jacket, her eyes glisten. 

“This, is for me” She asks with disbelief. 

“Of course” Theo smiles as he takes the jacket and helps put it on her. 

“This is a one and only jacket Alice, it was made just for you” I explain as I stand behind them, my hands in my pocket, my smile thankful. 

“That’s right Alice, this was made just for you” Hope confirms “It was made with rare materials, all of which will protect you” She explains

“In case something happens” Alice asks as she looks both at Theo and Hope

“Exactly, so it is vital that you wear it the whole time. Knowing Axiom, and it is starting to get hot again, we used a few materials to keep it breathable but here, this button” Theo turns Alice’s hand and rolls the sleeve up just a slight on her right arm to show a button “If you push it, it’ll activate a 2 minute period were the jacket self cools. The jacket should stay cool for up to 30 minutes and you can push it 5 times” 

“Whoa” Alice breathes in complete awe 

“But here is the important part Alice” Hope says rolling up Alice’s left sleeve just a little “This button is only for an emergency okay”

“Okay…what will it do” Alice asks 

“It’ll just activate an alert system of your location” 

“Does the jacket have to be zipped up to work” Alice asks as she glances at me. I smirk at her intuition to asks good questions. 

“Nope, we worked out that kink” 

“Okay” Alice nods before embracing them both “Thank you for keeping us all safe” Alice whispers. I watch Hope slightly freeze before she holds Alice closer. Theo bites his cheeks before kissing her head. 

“Well then, shall we go” I finally interrupt after a few seconds. 

“Lets” Alice says as she grabs Theo’s and Hope’s hands. I let them walk out first and then I follow. 

“Alice” Alex smiles down at her “You look beautiful my dear” 

“And you do too” Alice smiles up at her. I walk up behind them, watching Hope and Theo excuse themselves. 

“You look, beautiful” I compliment Alex as I stand behind Alice. 

“I love your suit” Alex replies. I smile, taking the advantage that my little girl is facing away from me to look over Alex’s nude dress. 

“Shall we go eat” Alice asks, her stomach growling. I chuckle and nod yes. We walk down the stairs and greet everyone at the table. 

“Oh Alice” Allie nearly cries as she sees her little niece. Alice runs into her arms as Allie smoothers her in love. I look at Alex whom shares that same smile. _Yep, definitely the right choice._

“Is it bad that I am completely happy that you let her come” Christen says behind me. 

“Chris” I giggle as I take her hand and spin her around “You look astounding” 

“As do you” She smiles “And you, wow, you look breath taking Alex” 

“Awe Press” Alex blushes as she hugs the tan woman. I smile at the sight, happy at how close they’ve become. I let them share their moment as I move to the table to take my seat next to Allie and Alice. 

“Well then, who’s ready to eat” I ask the group as I glance at my watch. _9:10am._

* * *

 

It’s 11am when we begin to head out the door. Allie and Jose hold on to Alice’s hands as I walk behind with Becky and Theo. 

“Everything is rolling smooth” Theo informs me above a whisper as we walk. 

“Good, everything solid with cameras” I ask Hope via a hidden connection. 

“Sure is, we’re set to go” Hope cuts off. I glance at Alex and Christen whom stand by a car, chatting about their project and how thrilled they are. 

“Momma, can I ride with Auntie, pleaseeee” Alice begs as she reaches my car with the select four. I step aside to give Allie a death glare. 

“Alice” I sigh knowing she won’t like my answer. 

“Ppppwwweeezzzzz” Alice whines making me bite my lip. 

“I’ll ride with Allie’s group and keep an eye on her if you want” Theo speaks up before I open my mouth. Surprise is written all over my face as I look over at him. 

“I, sure” Is all I manage to get out. Theo smiles before handing Becky a case. He takes Alice’s hand and leads them over to Allie’s large black SUV. Allie smiles excitedly as she and Alice enter the vehicle followed by Jose and Theo whom shoots me a thumps up. I nod and he closes the door. 

“Well, I guess that leaves us” I open the door for Becky, Syd and Hope. Once everyone is in, I close the door and walk down the row of cars ensuring everyone is in their spot. As I reach the first car containing Abby, Carli, two of the world leaders with Alex and Christen and two designated agents, I tap on the window. The cars shuffle out in order, my car stopping and allowing me in. 

“Lets get this over with” I whisper to myself. 

* * *

 

We arrive to Axiom at 12:30. Alex and Christen are rushed along side business partners and workers to the site opening while Theo, Hope, Becky and I take our spots. I find myself in one of the houses, open to the VIP lists, showing off the contemporary duplexes that will be awarded to those greatly affected in the war, as well as those with higher medical needs. All those outside the boarders of Axiom have a solid chance on purchasing a home with the help of Hope and Chris whom made it possible via all the resources Chris gathered with all her volunteer missions. 

As I walk around the two story home, with exception of the subterranean garage, I’m impressed. The layout, open and modern, with a bit of rustic and country tossed around the various houses for a added taste is amazing. Finding myself in front of a hologram desk with a proposition for a new building. In specific, a blue print for a new World Techs. 

“So, when was I going to be informed” I ask Hope via my ear piece. 

“The proposal just got approved” She replies immediately “Tobin” She asks as I remain silent, taking in the unique architecture of the proposed building. 

“It’s…big” I finally speak as I cross my arms and walk around the hologram. 

“Have you pushed the button yet” 

“Nope” I think out loud as my hand reaches out to push it. The room darkens, both displaying the quirks of the house and the money that the project would involve. Trying not to rule it out, I keep still as the presentation plays. As the details of the architecture are presented with meanings rather than luxury, I find myself dumbfounded. _This is…_

“Amazing huh” Theo asks as the presentations begins to end. I look over my shoulder and watch his gaze which admires the building “But keep watching” Theo whispers. My sight adverts back to the hologram as the building is dismantled and the location of the proposed building presented as none other than the same spot where Hope lost her brother. 

 

_Inspired by the clarity that tears allow us to see,_

_and by the souls we long to be with._

 

_In Memory of Those Lost Too Soon._

 

Reads the hologram as two initials appear.

 

_B. L. S_

 

I stare at the initials until the hologram rebuilds the building from the initials and its back to the start. Theo doesn’t talk and neither do I as I let it sink in. At first, annoyance and disbelief was my impression but now, all I feel is…sympathy. 

“I’ll fund it” Is all I say. 

“Tobin” 

“I’ll fund it Hope” I repeat myself. 

“Scout, that means so much but” 

“Hope, this is…this is beyond me and the details, the significance, it is…beautiful. If you won’t let me fund it, you have my council vote” 

“Really” Hope asks with raw emotion

“You have my word” I confirm. Hope’s silence informs me that she is struggling to control the tears but in this moment, I feel proud of her. I look at Theo and then at my watch and see that it is time for the grand opening. We walk to our seats in silence and soon enough, I’m sitting next to Alice and Allie in the second row. 

“Has anyone made contact with Sasic” I ask as I excuse myself to do a small perimeter check. 

“I got in contact with her not too long ago, her team is taking care of heights” Becky informs me through my ear piece. 

“Theo all eyes”

“We’re clear in the seated crowd” 

“Those still arriving” I ask Hope

“Clear” 

“Good, Becky, try getting in to contact with Sasic once again” I order before focusing my attention to my watch, scanning all systems, searching the crowds. I walk over to the television tents and quickly scan over the monitors making sure that the broadcasts are running smooth. 

“All eyes on deck, we are ready to go” Theo’s voice rings to my ears. 

“The ceremony begins in 2, get seated and don’t take attention away” I order as I quickly rush back to the seating area. I find Becky rushing back to her seat and I smile. 

“Where’d you go Momma” Alice asks as I sit down and straighten my jacket. 

“Just to the bathroom hunny” I smile as I glance at Allie who searches my eyes. I nod my head and she smiles. Soon enough, a hologram appears onstage and the crowd goes silent. A small video of the location’s history plays. Captivating the attention of everyone. I watch carefully, soaking in the details, the things I never knew about the location. _Didn’t even know Axiom had history._ I think to myself as I glance at Allie who shrugs just as conflicted as me. Soon enough the video ends out come Alex and Christen from opposites sides of the stage. The crowd claps as they reach the middle and hug. I smile with sincerity and pride seeing both people I love make such an impact. 

“Good evening everyone” Christen talks to the crowd “I hope everyone had a safe journey and trip here” 

“I just hope everyones awake” Alex jokes causing the crowd to laugh

“That too” Christen adds in giggles

“Well first things first, I want to thank you all for coming out in support, doubt or even mere curiosity for this project that Christen and I have been working endlessly to complete” Alex takes a moment before continuing “It’s been a long and exhausting experience. I had never done anything this big and standing here before you all, with the homes built, furnished and ready to become apart of various families is truly, I can’t even find a word to describe what I feel. But I want to thank two people. Firstly, I want to thank Christen” Alex pauses to face Christen, whom stands besides her, completely silent but with a big smile “Christen, over these past few months you have been so much more than the VP of the project. Besides managing resources, recruiting helpers, donors, funders, managing connections and communications, helping with presentations and so on, you have been a friend. And that is the biggest reward this whole project has given me. You were there when I never believed in my ideas, you planted a seed of trust and belief and helped sprout this dream into reality. I can’t thank you enough for all that you did. You are, by all means, just as much of the president of this project as I am. Thank you, with all my heart, thank you for everything” Alex finishes as she wipes away a tear. Christen is quick to embrace Alex and hold her for a few seconds. Once they pull away, Alex takes a deep breath before turning back to face the crowd “And lastly, I want to thank the workers who worked day in and day out to get these homes built to perfection. I can’t express how I felt when I saw it all finished. I simply will forever be in debt to the hard work you guys put in” Alex lets the crowd applaud those whom worked to actually build the homes “Now, with all that out of the way, I’m going to let christen get into details over the energy and details of the homes” 

“Give it up for the President of the Project, Alex Morgan” Christen speaks as soon as Alex takes a seat in a chair on the stage. Everyone rises to applaud Alex. She blushes before waving everyone off brings the attention back to Christen. Immediately, Christen runs over the details in such an ease that everyone, even Alice are amazed at the advancements. The presentation goes on, Alex getting involved at points, other people whom helped getting into it. I try my best to keep focus but much of my attention is on my watch and the information being fed into my right ear. 

* * *

 

**1:58pm**

I watch as Alex and Christen cut the red ribbon signifying the grand opening to Archi Homes and immediately stand and applaud. Alex and Christen embrace and I see that Alex is at this point, crying silently. 

“I’m so proud of them Momma” Alice smiles at me, making me smile. 

“Me too Babygirl, me too” 

I stand and wait as people clear out to explore the homes before taking Alice backstage. At the sight of Alex and Christen, Alice lets go of my hands and rushes to crush them in a hug. I watch from afar with happiness before my connection drops. Milliseconds later, it reconnects. 

“Theo”

“Sorry, I accidentally pushed the button” Theo apologizes making me groan. 

“Talking to ghosts” Christie comes up behind me

“As always” 

“This is amazing” She breathes, soaking in the environment and vibe. 

“It is” I reply. 

“It’s a shame Jeri didn’t show” Christie breathes causing me to cringe. I had been so focused on security that my mind didn’t even think of Jeri. _She didn’t show._

“I’m sure she has an excuse” 

“Oh I’m sure, all commanders do” She replies before excusing herself. I stand still in my spot, trying to figure out whether that was a dig at me or not. Nevertheless, I focus back at Alice and find her pointing at me. I smile at her before walking over to the small gathering. 

* * *

**3:00pm**

The entire event has gone smooth. A few hick ups with signals and slow catering but nothing out of control. Alice has been dragging me around, insisting we must see every house. _And who am I to deny my little girl?_ We’re roughly 3/4 a way through viewing every house before I ask Alice to sit still. My attention drawn to a display, featuring an antique book. 

“Hey Alice, come here baby” I whisper as I grab her hand and lead her over to the display. 

“What is it momma”

“A book” I explain

“Why is it yellow” She asks as I examine it. 

“Look here” I point as I bend over to pick her up “The pages are worn out from the ages, turning yellow due to their composition and exposure to the chemicals in our environment” 

“Can you read what it says Momma” Alice asks with curiosity. I glance at the font, immediately realizing the literature is too advanced for Alice. Setting her down again, I glance up before looking down at the book. Only, as I try to read the passage, I find my body frozen and my mind completely still. As I bring my eyes up again, it’s Alice’s voice that shocks my body into realization. _Jeri._  

Alice is running into her arms far before I’m capable of moving. I watch as Jeri sweeps Alice and holds onto her for dear life. Alice is crying and I see Jeri’s body shaking just the slightest bit too. At this, I walk around the display and over to them. Without a word, I embrace them both. 

“She’s home Momma, she’s home” Alice cries making me bite my lip. _That she is._

* * *

 

**3:47 PM**

“I will never get enough of her smile” Jeri breaks the silence as we watch Alice play with other children in the small park belonging to Archi Homes. 

“Someday, the world is going to feel the same way” I reply as I glance at my watch, not seeing any suspicious activity on the screen. Turning my sight to Jeri, I take in her figure. Surely, being commander forces your body to change but Jeri, she looks just the same as the day I ran into her in the hall of her house. _Always beautiful._

“Jeri” I begin, hearing the pain in my voice. 

“Yes Tobin” 

“I just, I think we should talk” I whisper, glancing around the park, ensuring no one can hear. 

“Actually, since the last time we talked, I’ve been meaning to talk to you as well” Jeri perks. 

“Tobin” Becky’s voice rings into my ear piece. 

“The last time” I repeat, unsure of when my clone Tobin talked to Jeri while I was in darkmode. 

“Tobin I can’t-” I silence my ear piece with a touch of a button before focusing my attention on Jeri. 

“Yeah when we discussed Alice’s school”

“Right right” I nod as if I remembered “Sorry, it’s been a while” 

“Yeah, anyhow, I was thinking” 

“Tobin, I can’t get a hold of Sasic” Becky voice rings through my ears. I furrow my brows, a tad bit annoyed that Becky used the emergency line to communicate with me but nevertheless alerted. 

“Jeri, could you give me a minute” I offer a sad smile. She averts her sight from my eyes and down to the ground. _Great._ I move away from the bench, walking a few steps away before finally connecting back to regular connection. 

“What do you mean, when was the last time you spoke to her” I half whisper, watching Jeri make a bunch of conclusions right before my eyes. 

“I tried after you ordered me to but wasn’t able to get ahold of her. I got a hold of Mittag but not Sasic”

“What are you saying” I ask now fully alerted. 

“I haven’t communicated to Sasic in hours, I don’t know where she went and Mittag stopped replying ten minutes ago” 

“Ten?!” I half yell

“Yes, I was in communication with two other agents and didn’t think much of it until they went out too just two minutes ago” 

“Theo” 

“Tobin” Jeri’s voice forces me to turn 

“Find them” I order my select group as I cut the connection and meet Jeri’s eyes. 

“You’re….you’re in charge of security I’m assuming” Jeri asks, trying to piece everything together

“Yeah” I breathe 

“Is everything okay” Her tone is out worry, concern. But I’m not sure if it is concern for Alice or me. 

“I, ugh, I think its best that we find Allie and have her take Alice home” I speak with composure as I glance towards Alice. 

“Tobin” Jeri stops me as I reach for her hand. 

“Jeri”

“I am the commander, I have the right to”

“Jeri don’t do this right now, I need you to” As I begin to pull away, Jeri catches my shirt. She doesn’t grab with much strength but enough to manage to pop a button off and reveal the vest I am wearing. Immediately her concerned look goes to realization and then, what I wished to never see in my life, anger. 

“I can”

“Explain?” Jeri interrupts me “Explain what Tobin, that you are wearing a life vest in a damn public opening to my sisters project?! You have a minute to explain what the hell is going on before I get Carli and find out myself” 

“Jeri, I’m just in charge of the security, just had to take precautions” I half lie, with a dry voice. The anger in Jeri’s eyes scares me and for once, I feel, inferior to her. 

“Is that why my daughter is wearing a vest too”

“Hope and Theo thought” 

“Don’t lie to me anymore Tobin, don’t” Jeri says with cruel pain rather than anger. I look into her eyes and see the drastic change. Moments ago, she was on fire but now, her lips quiver and her eyes are strained…on me. Even though her heart pounds, her perfect jaw tight, she still looks beautiful. Breaking my bones at the thought of having to tell her the truth. 

“Jeri, I haven’t” My voice is interrupted by the beeping of my watch alerting me of an emergency. With a glance to Jeri’s eyes, I know its over. The sirens begin to blast around and Alice’s eyes meet mine. She’s running at me and Jeri holds me still. 

“What else have you lied about” Her voice blunt and raw, full of confusion and fears. My silence, truthful and painful “She’s coming with me” Jeri commands with her strong voice. Everything tells me that I should listen, but my fears force me otherwise. 

“No” 

“I wasn’t asking for permission” Jeri finishes, as she grabs Alice. 

“Mommy, what’s going on” 

“We have to go babygirl” Jeri answers 

“Alice, activate your” 

“TOBINN” Hope’s voice is screaming into my ear, interrupting my sentence as I push down on the emergency button of Alice’s leather jacket. I see it coming in the corner of my eye. The small missile. Without much option, I push Jeri, Alice and I across the street, landing hard on my injured shoulder. 

My ears rings as I inhale the smell of smoke, the dust contaminating my lungs, burning my insides as I struggle. 

“Tobin, it’s-they-Michael-Theo” The connection is haywire and unclear as I cough and reopen my eyes. Like the speed of light, my diamond injects my central nervous system with medicine, jolting my scenes awake, bringing my body into attention and my mind into overdrive. As I stand, I throw my ear piece onto the destroyed street and meet Jeri’s sight. _Disbelief. Anger. Distrust. Sadness and most importantly, heartbreak._ That is what her eyes speak to me. She can see the vest clearly now, completely aware of the uniqueness and design. Obvious to the fact that it was made to keep me alive. The gun is fully visible too, along with two knifes I had stocked. _How do I explain this?_ ** _You can’t._** A security at most would carry taser bullets but me…how do I explain that I am wearing an advanced bullet proof best, equipped with the finest armory as of…yesterday. I stand a step in Jeri’s direction but she shakes her head no. She nuzzles Alice’s face closer and she’s off. Leaving me and all that I chose. 

It breaks me not to be able to run after Jeri and tell her that I never lied about loving her. That I did love her once and could have loved her just as much as I love Alex. But my mind knows that the public matters more than my personal life. Grabbing my phone, I immediately dial Becky’s number. 

“Tobin, Tobin we’re on the way” 

“Becky, who the hell”

“It’s them, the dark agents, and they have Sasic’s team” Theo’s breathless voice rings. My feet stop running and immediately the sinking feeling of defeat begins to settle. 

“Hope” 

“They’re coming Tobin, I’ve evacuated as many people at I can” 

“I’m heading to the enterance, keep rushing people out, Syd” 

“About half a mile out” 

“I need you on a roof top, I need eyes, go” I order before continuing my run to the front of Archi Homes, or…what’s left of them. As I begin to see the entrance of Archi homes, my heart drops. _How? How did this happen?_ I see Hope and Ash directly the crowd, people running. 

“Tobin” I hear my voice yelled. I turn and find Allie with Pinoe, Kristie, HAO and Abby. 

“What are you guys still doing here” I half yell as Abby begins to put a new ear piece on me. 

“Where’s Alice” Allie immediately asks, worried

“Jeri took her” 

“Where are Carli, Alex and Press”

“They were evacuated, followed the protocal” 

“You guys were a part of that too”

“You need us Tobin” Pinoe steps up

“I can’t let you”

“ I wasn’t asking you to” Pinoe states as she pulls a gun out from under her belt. _She is a squad member after all._ I don’t argue with her and soon, Kristie joins her. As Allie reaches to grab my gun, I stop her hand. I don’t look into her eyes, but instead at the ground. In the corner of my eye, I see agents arriving and I signal one to stop. 

“I can’t let you do that”

“Do not”

“I need you to be with Alice, Allie” I say through tears. 

“She’s going to be safe, she’s with”

“No Allie, you are the closest thing to me…you have to be there. You have to…Take her” I order Abby and the agent. Allie’s screaming fills my ears but my eyes remain on the ground. 

“This isn’t goodbye Tobin! This isn’t fucking goodbye! Tobin please! PLEASE!” Allie yells, begs but my sight doesn’t move. I hear Allie’s scream die out and life my head to see Allie’s asleep body being carried by the Agent, Becky informing Abby what she is to do when Allie wakes up. 

“Tobin” Pinoe’s soft voice brings my attention back “They’re closing in” 

“I know” I breathe as I turn around and prepare my gun. 

“Ash, you have to go” I order as I walk up to Hope, Theo, and some agents. 

“The hell I am leaving” 

“It’s an order Ashlyn” I say as I glance at my watch. 

“And who are you to” 

“Being the best scout known to man, I expected much more than this” I hear Zane’s voice ring in my ears. 

“It’s a coward move” 

“Agh, but it was a move…is it not what you said, you said it was my turn”  As Zane speaks, I signal Becky and the others to be on alert, asking Pinoe to find Syd and cover her. 

“I expected a more logical move” 

“Physics defy’s all logic, you more than others know that”

“Explain” I order, now more confused. Everyone turns to my confused. 

“Your wish is my command…I’ll save you having to repeat it to everyone else, you’re welcome” Zane’s voice cuts off and the least that I expect are bullets, but nothing comes. 

“Be on alter” I yell as I prop my gun up and look at the roof tops. 

“What did he say” Becky asks as she scans the area. 

“Who” Ash asks confused, still not aware. As I’m about to come up with a lie, Ali’s picture pops up on all the holograms still intact. _No._ I watch Ash drop her gun and her sight glue to the hologram displaying a very pregnant Ali running along side me. Back in that warehouse she went to. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I hate being a party pooper but someone here is hiding someone we are looking for” Zane’s voice rings through the streets speakers. 

“That, that’s” Ash can’t bring herself to say his name and I can’t bring myself to move. 

“You see, Tobin Heath has been running a secret squad, constructed of very few…I presume…four, five, tops six” Zane explains. Shifting the picture from Ali and I to some of Syd, Theo and Becky “But the best part is, she’s incorporated a few Axiom members” A picture of Hope flashes on the screen, and I bite my tongue “She’s been playing not only the public but her very own love interest, the commander, or should I say…ex love interest…While Jeri’s been out thinking she was doing something good, Tobin’s kindled a love with no one other than the commander’s sister… Alex Morgan” At the mention of Alex, I take a step but Kristie grabs me “Oh hail the greatest scout ever. Tobin Heath. But her love interest is not what I am here to discuss. Hand over Ali Krieger and no one will be harmed. It’s your turn now Tobin. After all, you wanted to play this game” Zane voice cuts off and a picture of me stopping Christie and Christen from shooting Zane as he makes his get away at our first meeting remains displayed by the holograms. At the sight, Kristie drops my arm, mortified by the truth. I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. Ash’s fist meets my face and I fall. My head spins but the world makes sense. This is my reality. _It always has been._  

“Ashlyn” Becky tries stopping her from walking away but I stop Becky. 

“It’s no use” I cough out the blood and rise “I lied to her, and that can never be undone” 

“Who could’ve leaked that information” Hope asks and its clear blue. I avert my eyes up and see Michael next to his awaiting vehicle, unharmed. He puts his aviators on and gets into the back of his awaiting car. 

Without warning I raise my gun. 

“Tobin what the hell are” I don’t wait for Hope to stop asking her panicked question as I shoot Michael’s tires. 

“Arrest him” I order agents. They rush to Michael’s vehicle and I turn my back to the squad. 

“Syd” 

“They’re retriving” 

“They weren’t planning on attacking” I explain “It was just to keep us distracted, to think they were, to keep us moving as they hacked into the media networks…I suspect theres no injuries either” 

“None Scout” An agent informs. I don’t even bother to correct my name as it is true. I have never stopped being Kardia’s scout, Kardia’s puppet. With a nod, I tuck my gun away and order everyone back. 

“What, no, what the hell are you talking about Tobin” 

“No more, Hope, no more, I, can’t…No more interruptions” I breath as I suck in air deep. _No More._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO?!


	9. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HEY! 
> 
> Took me a while but I like to call this a heavy chapter because it's a lot of details from Oblivion so be aware. Lots of going back and fourth. 
> 
> Anyhow, its my birthday and this was my biggest wish, to get this uploaded today so here it is. I'll keep writing in bits, already half way through the next chapter so I'm hoping to have it done by the end of August!

Truth 

You’re never really aware of the consequences of your actions until, well, until you’re living through them. I sit in a van with Hope, Becky, Theo and Syd. Each and every one of us silent, as if suddenly, we were aware of our actions. Suddenly aware of how much damage each and every one of us is capable of.  

Reaching into my back pocket, I pull out my wallet and pull out a small picture of Jeri and Alice sound asleep. The same picture I slipped into her bag when she left Citadel after being healed from her gun wound. Letting my head rest against the window, I let out a shaky breath, feeling my chest tighten as I fight the tears. Unable to, my head falls and the streams of salt roll down my face. _I’m sorry, Ash. I’m sorry, Jeri. I’m sorry, Alice._

* * *

 

**3 AM The Next Day**

As we arrive to the location I ordered the driver to go to, I see Becky tense and Syd drop her sight. 

“Where are we” Hope asks, looking amongst the four. 

“Hope, I think its best you don’t ask” 

“She’ll know as soon as she sees it” I interject Becky before sliding the van door open. I hope out and reach for my backpack, letting it hang on my shoulder as I grab my gun and head towards the building. Two other blacked out vans arrive with agents, and they quickly begin to unload the van with equipment. I hear my select fours foot steps behind me as I walk up to the entrance and pull out a lanyard with keys on it. 

“A bit unsecured don’t you think” Theo comments. I pause to look up at him before going back to unlocking the chain. It takes some muscle to get the lock to come undone but soon enough, the chains hit the floor. Becky grabs on to a handle and I reach for the other. We pull the doors apart just enough for the agents to bring the equipment after us. 

“An abandoned car factory…” Hope questions. 

“Agh, so that’s what they told you guys” I ask unamused by Axiom’s lies. 

“If that’s not what it is…then what is it” Theo asks. I’m a little shocked at his question but remember that Theo didn’t have the hardest upbringing like others. He comes from a town closer to Axiom. 

“Why don’t you go find out for yourselves” Syd answers before me. Theo and Hope glance at me before I nod towards the inside. Hope enters first, then Theo, followed by Syd and Becky and finally, me. The first few parts of the factory have been restored by me, not giving away the true identity of the place but soon enough, the restoration vanishes and Hope’s footsteps slow down. I keep my distance and allow Hope’s still breath fill my own lungs with mild satisfaction. Theo stands not far from Hope, but his reaction the same. Syd and Becky, both very aware of where we are, unmoved, but out of respect.  

“So you see, this isn’t an abandoned factory” I begin as I walk over to Hope and Theo. I stand between them and stare at what they look at “Yes, at one point, this place was a car factory.. Centuries ago…but the war, the poor, the seperation… _the sickness…_ it took over” 

“Oh my god” Theo curses under his breath “So it was true” He gulps with a strained voice. Hope’s tears speak louder than her thoughts as she fights to keep it together. 

“The government decided to use old factories and warehouses to stash the sick, the poor and the homeless until they could figure out a way to get rid of us. Feeding Axiom and close towns lies about it…Theo is living proof of it” I explain as my eyes look over the broken down, rusted metal that remains of very simple medical beds besides trashed, useless medical equipment. _Useless._

“You were housed here” Theo confirms 

“For a while, yes” 

“Those beds…they…” 

“Have significant meaning to me, yes” I finish for Hope. At my response, she excuses herself and I’m left standing with Theo, Syd and Becky. 

“Tobin, I didn’t”

“It’s okay Theo, people are not being housed in warehouses anymore, not since the world leaders at least” 

“When was this place shut down” He asks, still staring in the direction of the untouched beds. 

“A little after I left, I was five…so roughly when I was turning seven” 

“And why were you here…poverty right” He asks

“In part” I reply and he swallows hard “There was no need to buy the property…no one was interested…the sickness really scared people…having lived through it, I wasn’t, therefore I landed this place for free. Restored a few places, we’ll work primarily on the upper floors that are restored for the major part. You won’t have to see this part of the factory…theres a stair case back towards the entrance and such” Without a further word, Theo heads towards the entrance. I stare at the old beds for a second longer before heading back too. 

* * *

 

**7pm**

After settling in on the third floor, much of the equipment has been installed and added to my semi existing collection.  I stare at the clear glass whiteboard that hangs in my corner.  Running my eyes over the various neon colors paints the glass, trying to decipher just what Zane wanted with his little stunt and how he pulled it off.   

“Maybe we’re going all about this wrong” Theo breathes as his stands from the floor rocker he has sat in for the last three hours. 

“No, no keep looking” I reply with disoriented eyes. I cross my arms tighter and continue to stare at the board. 

“Tobin” Becky calls breaking my trance. She signals me to follow and I do. She leads me over to the hawk section where three black scorpion like chairs have been set up. The scorpion units have monitors stretching out 180 degrees in front of the user which allows for hawk vision while monitoring the various cameras throughout the Kardia region. Syd sits in the middle console, her hands maneuvering the high tech leavers at her side, her eyes scanning at a rate beyond normal. Syd is inside the unit, closed off to everyone else to ensure 100% focus, clearly visible to Becky and I. She doesn’t know we are here as inside the unit, the glass is black but is transparent to everyone on the outside. 

“What did she find” I ask as I bring up the hologram at the side of Syd’s chair to see what she sees on the screen. 

“I’m not sure yet, but she has that look in her eye” 

“She’s on to something” I confirm. Becky nods before crossing her arms and leaning against the unit behind us “Alright Syd…lets see what you can find” I breath as I turn my full attention to her screen.  At first, I don’t understand what Syd is searching for. It doesn’t piece to me. _Why this region of Kardia._ I ask myself as Syd scans everything, hours before, zooming faster than I can catch up. 

“Just wait, she is searching this region for a reason” Becky breathes through closed eyes. 

“You’ve seen her do this before” 

“A couple of times, never with the scorpion, the higher tech ones back at Citadel but this is very impressive” 

“The last time I used one of these had to be back when I was…n’t a Scout” I think out loud. 

“You’re kidding” Becky finally opens her eyes. I look at her and the tiredness and madness is evident. _She’s crashing…just like everyone else._

“I’m not” I pause to glance at the two other agents who work restless like Syd “Being a Scout requires you to lead, to…be at the front, to” 

“do the dirty work” Becky finishes. 

“Exactly. All this information, the build up… I never really got that. I covered ground, I got answers when I wanted and needed, I got blood one my hands but never really got the knowledge” 

“Perhaps thats why Scouts are given a squad… to make up for the lack of information. But it’s interesting because even when you don’t know the build up, you yourself build up the squad. You give them the essentials to be able to work up missions…Or, well gave when that was our lives” 

“I guess” 

“And, you also have what no other scouts have” 

“And what is that” I ask, turning my head away from the hologram to look at Becky. 

“You have the knowledge of the truth. The war, the one that landed us with this sickened world, you **lived** though the build up to our war. The one we are fighting now. We know the cause, but you, you are the cause. We fight for you because you are our only true knowledge of the truth” Becky finishes. Before I can process anything, the hologram begins to beep red and my attention quickly returns to Syd. 

“That’s….” Before Becky can finish, the screen, which Syd was analyzing recordings from a camera out far, cuts black for two seconds before returning to the previous recording, only our suspect is no longer there. Syd exits the unit and leaves the floor in a hurry, hurt from what she saw. I close my eyes and hold my breath, feeling Becky’s eyes on me. 

“Get them and bring them here” I order as I open my eyes “Take Theo with you, leave Syd and Hope out of it” 

“But Syd..” 

“If she sneaks in, just let her, but keep an eye on her” Becky nods and quickly rushes to get Theo. He turns to look at me and I nod for him to go. They rush immediately, Hope never noticing. Ordering an agent to take Syd’s place, I walk back over to my corner and continue to examine the board. Around one in the morning, I make my way down to the first floor where Theo and Hope saw reality. 

I walk over to some steps across the old medical beds and run my finger along the rusted rail. Meeting the midway point, I stick my feet through the middle bar of the hand rail and sit down on it, letting my feet dangle over the edge. I rest my arms on the top bar of the rail, letting my head lay on top, my body leaning forward. Staring at the blood dry beds, the memories here begin to flash back. 

 

_Years ago…_

_“Will he die” I ask Sophia as she grips my hand and we walk by the rows of poor, ill people._

_“Only time will tell my love” She replies with a strong but confidence-lacking voice. Her hand moves me tightly against her as she rushes us past them. Trying her best to keep me naive, trying hard to keep me safe and sick-free. We reach the other end of the hall before we stand and wait for others to come down the stairs. Turning my head, I look back and see doctors rushing to a specific location. I see a child, not much older than me, not much weaker than I…but it is not the sight of him that haunts me. For what I see next is what does. The child’s small nose bleed increases. He begins to bleed from his ears suddenly…from his mouth. One second his looking ahead, scared and then he turns. Meeting my eyes…before having a seizure. I hear the pleading and the silence as Sophia covers my eyes and pushes me forward as the cries of grief fill the entire floor, engraving a new scar in my soul._

 

The footsteps bring me back to reality. I inhale Becky’s smell and sigh. _She’s back._

“This isn’t where he…passed away right” 

“No” I reply, opening my eyes to look across the place over to the beds that still remain “Jamison passed away in the small comfort of his home. We were shipped here shortly after” I answer. 

“Then why keep those” Becky asks, staring at them, wondering if I kept them to hurt myself or to remind myself. 

“Would you believe me if I told you it was because I’m scared” I reply, inhaling deep, trying to find oxygen in the air. My eyes zoom in on the broken glass surround the area across, looking at the empty broken bottles of medicine, the half standing medicine drawers and the torn up sheets that are stained yellow with sickness. 

“I would have no reason not to believe you” She turns to me. 

“When I first got the place” I pause shaking my head at the memory, feeling my insides threatening to come up my throat “It was filled with illness, the windows tainted with disease, the smell of death reeked far before reaching the entrance… I can’t tell you how many times I puked while cleaning. How many times I ran out, unable to breathe, unable to walk because the memories, both old and new were surreal. Like damn sections of a haunted movies taken out and I was forced to live through. I found things, missing pieces and pieces I never found puzzles they belonged to…People run from the truth” I state, thinking of Hope’s reaction “People choice not to believe in the truth” I say while thinking of Theo. 

“So then why did you tell Theo and Hope that you weren’t scared of it…if you are” 

“I’m not scared of facing the past” I answer as I turn to look at her “It is not that, that scares me. Rather, it is that I accepted the truth…that scares me. I accepted my faith. I settled. I let them take us here. I let things get this far…just like everyone else here, I accepted the truth of our reality. Never questioned, never fought, never did anything until I had the opportunity to. And that was the biggest mistake in my life. That is my biggest failure. I should’ve questioned, I should’ve fought, everyone here should’ve, but we were all alibis of our own situation. I waited. And so did everyone here…we waited for this to happen. We waited for the sick to die, to be shipped to other locations, waited for the time to rebel, waited to attack, waited to tell those we loved that we do and waited to tell those we don’t. I made a mistake, I gave Zane the ball. I let Michael go and now we are here” 

“And those beds…” Becky asks, turning her sight back to the beds. 

“When I could stomach the smell and past, I lost myself here. I grabbed everything and anything and threw it out, not paying attention to the pain I was enduring. It wasn’t until I got to those beds over there that I was knocked out of my trance of madness. I gripped the bed over there as I was enraged and as soon as the metal pierced my skin, I saw it. My own blood dripping onto the dried blood of the countless that died in here. I had been so lost, so mad, that I did not see that I was covering myself with the particles of the dead here. I looked at my hands and saw the boy who looked me before going into seizure and dying. His bed was the third one on the left…So I keep them. As a reminder to not settle. Don’t settle for fear, don’t settle into madness…Be the madness but always remember that the truth is accepted only to an extent that the individual wants to see” 

“And what truth do you see”

“A truth that can’t be questioned” I reply. 

“He’s upstairs, I think its time we question and fight” Becky informed me. I nod with a small smile before hopping off the railing and head upstairs with Becky. As I walk through the open doors of the third floors, I signal Theo to grab him. 

“What are you doing” Hope immediately pushes off a desk as I pull down some chains that hang from the ceiling. Theo brings his body below the hook and helps me hook his cuffs to it. Becky begins to lift the chains until his feet are standing on the ground. 

“Thats good, Syd” I ask looking around the room, seeing she’s absent. 

“She rather not put herself in a spot to cave” Theo comments more than asks. 

“That’s fine…Hope” I ask. 

“I want to be here” 

“You sure” I ask. She nods but I see the slight hint of fear. _She will manage._

“Wake him” I order Becky. She walks over to her medical desks to grab an injector and walks over to him. She places the injector behind his neck and we hear the click. His startled breathing and movement move me forward. I remove the black cloth covering his face and stop him from moving. 

“What the hell did you do to me” He asks, cringing in pain. 

“Becky removed your tracker that the world agents had implanted in your thigh when you were handed over for treason” I explain as Becky gives him a second implant to subdue his pain. 

“You never know when to stop do you” He mutters as he spits out blood. I glance at Theo who shrugs. 

“You taught me not to stop” I reply as I lean into the desk behind me. 

“I don’t suppose you kidnapped me from regional custody to ask for my daughters hand in marriage” 

“Agh, you are the one who doesn’t know when to stop” 

“Just like my daughters… you don’t know what you’re getting yourself into” 

“Well, if you hadn’t betrayed your region and told us everything you knew, we wouldn’t be here now would we” 

“What was that small interrogation for anyways” Michael asks. 

“Matters that we still can’t seem to figure out because of your unwillingness to cooperate. But that’s besides the matter. We have the proof the world leaders need to well, to do whatever they please with you” 

“So then why do you have me” 

“I just want to know what you told them and what they asked from you” I reply simply as I take my glasses of water and take a sip. He begins to laugh while I sip on my water. I let him have his moment before shattering the cup in my hand and letting the blood pool out of my hand slowly. He stares both amazed and concerned. 

“You see” I pause as Becky hands me a towel to wrap around my hand “Pain is… a good friend of mine, we get along” I speak as I wrap the towel around my hand. I see Hope in the corner of my eye a bit concerned while Theo takes a few steps back “But I have a feeling you’ve never met pain. So I figured, they threatened to hurt you and you gave in” I swing at Michael and get the reaction I’m looking for. 

“Oh come on” Theo snickers as Micheal opens his eyes to see that I am holding the chains he is dangling from and not my fist in his face. 

“Really? Pain is what breaks you” I ask amused “Lord would’ve known… this war would’ve been over years ago. Well, anyhow, I need you to tell me exactly what you told them and what you know, or else my not so nice friends are gonna come play” I threaten as I grab a chair and signal Hope to lower the chain so he can sit. 

“They’ll kill me” 

“And you think keeping your mouth shut won’t kill you? One step in prison and you’re dead. You’re forgetting that everyone in prison is either people you help put there, people who’s families you’ve killed or people who just have a thirst for blood. So I make you a deal, you tell me and I will make sure you end up in your own little box and get your share of five saltines and a cup of water a day… you know…like the way you make some agents live by during the days” 

“I rather die their then in the hands of those you’re falling into” 

“Oh you’re a real cookie to break” I sigh as I crack my neck and walk over to my desk. 

“Yeah, and Citadel’s firewalls are hard to crack, am I right” He asks, yet again trying to hike a mountain he believes to be a hill. 

“Oh, if you’re concerned about us finding the use of your little trust funds and money… no worries, I am sure your wife already knows” I smile as I grab a folder off of Theo’s desk and slide it his way. He glances at the pictures and laughs. 

“Always knew she was cheating” 

“Not like you were any better” Hope murmurs under her breath. Michael turns to her and smiles. 

“Oh, you really want to judge me…as if you weren’t just inches away from killing your best friend…ex I mean” What happens next doesn’t at all surprise me at all. Theo on the other hand. I grab onto his arm as the metal bar in Hope’s hand meets Michael’s stomach with a blow that echoes through the entire floor. Agents stand by watching, all in shock that Hope, someone whom once was close to Michael, delivered the first blow. _Sadly, she did it for the wrong reason._ Becky moves to Hope, takes the bar and shoves Hope out of the room. 

“Well that was exciting” I breathe as I grab another glass of water. 

“This is abuse” Michale coughs. At his choice of word, I tilt my head. Glancing at the entrance of the floor, I stand taller. Pulling a chair besides me, I drag it until it’s in front of Michael. Spinning it with ease, I sit with the back of the chair pressed against my chest. 

“Abuse is, if I recall correctly, acceptable within the borders of Kardia if in case of life threatening situations both to leaders and/or the squads, and, if it threatens Kardia’s mission…that is, abuse is legal under a strict, ordered and secretive fashion for the better of ‘the cause’” I finish “Am I right” I look around the agents whom all nod yes, including Becky whom has returned from disciplining Hope’s childish behavior. 

“Am I right Michael… or was that contract that I signed, the one where I signed both my life and those of who I live to witness the cruelty you supported. The paper I signed that granted me access to Citadel’s most hidden treasure, the signature that let me see things far beyond your power…did that signature mean nothing” 

“You see, just like last time, you could solve your own doubts” Michael coughs. I signal a scout to bring him water. I wait until Michael is finished before pressing on him to continue. 

“I have questions, not doubts” 

“Oh please, you’re all a bunch of kids trying to save the world blind. They see everything. And if you would just stop looking at me as if I was the solution, you would see realize I’m just a problem. A personal one too” 

“I didn’t bring you here to fix anything, any less to discuss my disgust for you. I brought you here for mere confirmation. Now tell me, you met up with them in that City” 

“The camera proves it, so why ask” He laughs sarcastically 

“Was it Zane” 

“Like I said, you already know the answers” 

“Theres still something I can’t quite figure out…” I pause as Becky hands me the vanilla folder. I glance at Theo whom nods “If you knew about Unknowns, and made an agreement with Zane…why not just give him everything he is looking for? I mean, he’s searching for the same thing I am. The substance that our bodies are dependent on. But what exactly are we depending on. After hacking into Citadel’s system, which of course, we were about to do so with your cooperation in our last chat, we appreciate your help, but thats besides the point, why not give him the answer. Why have him come after Ali? Why have him come after me when you could have given it all to him. Was it because you wanted to use the information as leverage…or because your little memory eraser tool you supplied to him wasn’t so successful” 

At this, his breathing shallows. _Agh, there it is._

“I swear I don’t know what he’s working for” 

“Start by telling me about Huros and Telios” I smile as I get up from my chair and have Theo patch Michael up to a lying detector. 

“Whats there to know, you know just as much as me” He breathes out as Theo finishes 

“Well, I have suspicions” 

“Look, Telios and Huros are real, or were, as far as” 

“Were? What do you mean were” Becky interrupts as she walks over to her medical desks and grabs her tablet. 

“There was a time period, Huros went blank, it was a while ago, we didn’t think much of it. Their agents were there, but it was just like, for 10 minutes, they didn’t exist” 

“When was this” Theo asks as he walks over to some computers. I signal two agents to follow before turning my sight back to Michael. 

“A little after…” Michael stares at me. I raise my eyebrows and he sighs “After we found the unknown” 

“You waited, all this time…to tell us this” Becky huffs

“Look, whatever it is that Zane and his bunch of wildings want is not in Huros. That just might be some other problem. Zane wants Ali. And you should focus on that more than you should focus-”

“This isn’t adding up, board” I order as I look around the table trying to find my neon color pens. An agent soon appears before me with the glass board that was in my room. Everyone looks a bit surprised at the amount of details scattered all around “When was Carli hospitalized” I asked Becky. 

“Thats the first of many downfalls” Theo breathes. 

“I believe you got the alert about the Unknowns before much happened” Becky thinks out loud

“Okay” I breathe as I write a one and the words ‘Unknown Alert’ on the board “What’s next” 

“Allie’s surprise Dinner” Syd comes walking in. We all turn to look at her, but quickly continue our brain storming. I write the number two, then ‘Allie’s Dinner’. 

“Theres, um, Alex and you at the club” Becky continues. 

“Right” I murmur as I write it on the board. 

“Carli’s Accident came after the club” Hope comes in last. I nod, write it on the board. _Carli’s Hijack Attempt._

“You went to see Allie after” 

“Right, then I went to the police station with you” I point at Michael. 

“I don’t understand why you are focusing so much on details, you should be out worrying about your friend” 

“We’re not just up against anything…these people, they’re trained. They’re precise, and that comes from preparing and examination. There’s something we are missing and thats motive. Why are they doing this” Syd explains.  

“Focus back on the timeline, what happened next” Theo brings the attention back to the mission. I grab the pen and write down December 7th. It is not said out loud, but everyone knows exactly what day it was when we lost Allie. 

“Don’t forget, you assigned us the special agents the same day as Carli’s…yeah” Becky interrupts. I nod and write it on the board. We continue to peace out what we can until we have a pretty good timeline set out. 

“What’s this useful, you’re wasting time” Michael huffs 

“From what I remembered, you didn’t care…what changed” 

“Guess he’s just scared we will hand him over” 

“Doesn’t matter, you said that Huro’s went out a little after we were delivered the news of unknowns” 

“Yes but what” 

“When did you guys begin to hack into Citadel’s systems, or try to at least” I ask Hope whom pauses to think “When Christie found out that you were notified, maybe, I don’t know, we attempted a couple of times but usually gave up, the firewalls were always too much work for our computers so we could shut everything down and destroy them ourselves, why” 

“Wait, you destroyed them yourselves” I ask suddenly looking away from the board. 

“Yeah, why” Dragging my sight from Hope to Michael, his words replay in my head. 

 

_“As you heard Scout, someone, somehow, within Kardia forces is trying to get into the sector. But don’t be alarmed, they couldn’t even get past the first set of codes. We shut down the hacker, saddly, we fried their systems that we couldn’t find out who it was”_

 

“Tobin, what is it” Becky asks. 

“Zane wasn’t assigned to me until Carli’s accident” I breathe out. Everyone takes a moment to try to piece my comment to everything we’ve discussed so far. 

“Okay and what exactly does that mean” Hope asks. 

“Zane can’t get to anything his group of rebels need because Zane doesn’t know much before the weeks he was assigned. And the memory hijack thing, the thing you guys used on the Unknowns, if that is what you supplied to them, then the results are similar. Zane can’t remember everything. But Zane must… recall Ali for _some_ reason and he think she is key to fix the device and somehow, retrieve information or whatever he needs in huros” I think out loud. 

“We need Jeri, now” Becky rushes out of the room. 

“You’re making a mistake” Michael breathes out. 

“Yes, well, if I am, you’re paying the price” I reply before Theo bags his head. 

* * *

“You sure this’ll go our way, you are planning to kidnap thee commander of Kardia in a moment of total craziness” Becky asks as we sit in command chairs of the hover craft. 

“Just watch my back will you. Carli won’t dare command an order against us even if we kidnapped Michael. And Jeri’s men won’t shoot if the shot injuries her as well” I explain. 

“You know, you couldn’t opt for a trade? Give them Michael for a 15 minute sit down with Jeri?” 

“That would make it hard on Carli as everyone wants to see Michael’s head on a stick and mine for the matter as I took him so…easier this way”

“For them, not for us” Becky huffs making me chuckle. 

“Oh lighten up, you’ll get your chance to shine” I smile. Theo alters us that we are close to landing. I glance at becky before unbuckling my seatbelt and heading to my locker. I grab the vest I put together and begin to put it on. 

“Whoa whoa whoa you said we were only kidnapping her, not trying to kill us all” Hope breathes as she catches sight of the hard wiring of the vest. 

“It’s the only way they’ll surrender”

“And if they shoot” 

“They won’t” I breathe as I begin to put on my flannel. Hope shakes her head and walks away, making me roll my eyes at her fears. Once Theo begins landing, a small alarm ring, letting us know that heavy air crafts as soon to meet us here. 

“Well, lets get out and give them a proper greeting” I smile as Theo lands. We wait in the deserted fields for Jeri and Carli’s heavy armored crafts to land. Exactly 3 minutes behind us. Men, agents, all whom which I’ve once trained or seen train rush and spread among the field. Treating us as, well, kidnappers and a threat. 

“Well that’s an entrance” I breath as Becky shakes her head.

“You’re crazy you know” 

“Yeah, I know” 

We wait for Jeri, Carli, Ash and two agents to make there way to us. They stand just 7 feet from us, a bit angered and on alert. 

“If you wanted to be found, then you got that” Carli yells over the hover crafts spinning propellors.

“I need something” I respond in a shallow voice, not as loud as Carli but enough to be heard. 

“You always do” Ash mutters. 

“You’re not in any position to-”

“Where is he” Jeri cuts Carli and stares me down. I sigh and signal Syd who shovels Michael forward on his knees and removes the covering off his head. Jeri’s eyes slightly glisten with anger due to Syd’s treatment granting me every signal I need to pursue my intentions of this meeting. Without a second to split, I grab Jeri’s arm and bring her body against me. Red dots immediately cover my body and Jeri’s as guns are raised and breaths hitch. 

“What in the world’s hell are you doing Tobin” Carli grabs Ash as I tighten my grip on Jeri who fights against me. 

“I told you I needed something” I respond as I try my best to keep Jeri contained. An agent clicks his gun and Carli immediately grows worried. 

“Tell me what you need and we will work it out Tobin” She speaks 

“Ms. Lloyd what do you want us to do” An agents asks besides her, his gun pointed at me while his agents point at my team. 

“Tobin” 

“Let her go” Ash fumes. 

“Ash, don’t even” I’m unable to finish my sentence as Jeri manages to break my lock and turn herself against me. Now we are both covered in  red dots as all my team, including becky point at her and Kardia’s side points at me. 

“Target on lock” And agent yells and I see that Jeri’s body isn’t giving me much cover, so I do the next un-logical thing to do. Tackle Jeri. We’re on the floor, the sound of our muscles stretching, guns clicking, hands shaking as everyone is at ties. Unable to move, unable to shoot nor willing to shoot. What do you do, when thee ex-commander tries to kidnap thee current commander? Nothing I suppose as Jeri and I find each other in a fight. A few punches later, I wind up with Jeri below me, unable to move. I hold myself still over her as I close my eyes and listen. Like I have done my entire life. 

The sound of her hard breathing, the sound of no one else breathing, the sensation of nerves coming from Becky who did warn me about the dangers of my attempt. But last, the sound of my tired bones. 

“I need you” I finally breathe. It’s soft enough for Jeri to hear and enough to again, alert an agent on her side. I know I can’t move now as I’ve put myself in the open but having Jeri in a position to look at me and hold her steady seems like the easier way to go. _Even if I do get shot._

“Tobin” Becky yells as me, trying to figure out what to do. 

“I need you, Jeri” I repeat again as I open my eyes to look at her. 

“You only ever need me when you want something” She replies. At her reply, I simple get up and walk back to my side. 

“You don’t get to leave with him” Carli insists as Theo begins to shuffle Michael to his feet. 

“We don’t always get our ways do we now” I reply over my shoulder as we start loading up. As I reach the hovercraft, Hope stops me. I turn to follow her salient sight and she Jeri talking to a very infuriated Ashlyn and a concerned Carli. 

“What is she” 

“She’s doing what a commander would do” I sigh as Jeri leaves her gun and begins to walk our way. I don’t wait as I get into the hover craft and head straight to my command room as Becky takes care of thee newest detainee. 

* * *

 

**Few hours later…**

“She’s not going to talk to us you know” Becky inquires as I hum. Tossing my head back in frustration,  I stand and throw my coffee cup in the trash. 

“Any particular reason why she volunteered” Hope asks 

“She knows Tobin wouldn’t have tried to kidnap her without reason. She’s here to see what we know” Syd answers for me

“And we don’t want her to know” I reply. As I place my hands on the table and let my head fall. Turning to look through the glass mirror, I see Jeri handcuffed to the table, straight right at me, knowing I’m behind the mirror “Have you checked in with Nadine” I ask Becky turning some of my attention away from the situation. 

“About an hour ago, says they’re good, will be moving to the second house soon” She replies. I nod and begin to think of the best way forward. 

“I need a squad of 3 out along with you Becky” 

“Whoa whoa whoa” 

“Look, you are thee only one that can help Ali if anything”

“Oh no no no, nope, send anyone else but I am not” 

“Becky” 

“I’m not going and thats final” Becky slams before crossing her arms and taking a seat. 

“Hope” 

“I’ll do it” She says and I thank. She heads out of the room leaving Syd, Theo, Becky and an agent. Picking up a folder, I inhale some tense air before walking to the door. 

As I step inside, she turns to look at me. I take a seat across from her and place the folder on the desk. 

“Since when is kidnapping on your resume” She asks. 

“He is being taken care of, you don’t have to”

“It is my job to worry” She interrupts. 

“I understand that” 

“Do you” She questions in disbelief. 

“Yes” I reply as I finally look up to meet her eyes. 

“He was going to be judged Tobin, and you took that from the public” 

“He was going to be prosecuted Jeri” I reply, knowing damn too well that she is trying to act tougher than she is in the moment. 

“Rightfully so” She breathes thru clenched teeth. Conflicted by her own words. 

“If you want him to be trailed and face the death penalty, then you will get that, it wasn’t my intention to halt or save him” I explain.

“Then what did you want” She breaks in fury. 

“If you think for any second think that I want him alive, you are wrong. He deserves not a single spec of the attention and care we have given him. But his monstrous actions have given me no choice. He has killed so many people, hurt so many and has gone as far as putting your sisters life on the line. He took my life Jeri. But that doesn’t stop him from being your father. So don’t try to act above your emotions. You’re not like us. You may wear the name, may brace his last name, but he never robbed you of a life like he did us. So stop. Because this is personal to us and merely an involvement to you” I respond. Jeri takes a moment to look at the floor and I know I’ve hurt her “He’s not the reason you are here” I begin after a few seconds “I need you to tell me what happened to you when you attempted to go to Huros”.

Immediately her sight returns to meet mine. 

“What in the hell is going on” 

“Look, Jeri, it is best if you just tell me what you lived, what you saw, and what you heard and leave” 

“You don’t get to make those commands” 

“I’m not commanding you, I’m asking” I reply. 

“It is against the”

“Jeri, I already kidnapped your father and the commander of Kardia, so don’t even begin right now” 

“Tobin” Becky rushes in. Her sight is pale and her lips are cold. Not a second splits before I’m out the door and in the command level below. 

“Give me eyes” I yell as I rush to the screens. 

“We were hit, we were just-” 

“Hope, Hope, get me better eyes” I order as I look at a clouded screen. 

“They”

“Hope, hang on your mico-“

“-so many of-”

“Gosh dammit get me eyes and her location” I yell as I try to take control myself. 

“Nadine” 

“Hope, Hope can you hear us” An agent speaks. 

“We rushed in, they had it spooked by the time we got there, Agent Marcus didn’t-”

“Keep working” I order the agents as their work seems to be paying off “Cameras, where are my better”

“We’re working on it” Theo yells as his take the command chair from the technology section. 

“Off Trillium street” An agent yells. I don’t even need to order Syd as she deploys out of the room with five agents.

“-found Sasic and-”

“Hope, Hope, help is on the way, help is”

“Zane is-”

“Zane, what about Zane, Hope!” I yell as I move my hands quicker “Theo!” 

“Theres no more cameras, they’re all down” Theo finally breathes as he lets go of the controls. 

“-Tell Kel that”

“No don’t pull that bullshit Hope, don’t” 

“-she’s gone” Is the last thing we hear before her suits power dies and the line is left dead. The room falls silent and I grab the closet thing to me and slam it at the ground. Theo rushes out of the room and I know exactly where he is headed. Becky follows him and I go out the door too.

“Theo, you need to calm down” Becky orders as she holds him against his will. I walk past them and head back to Jeri. When I open the door, she is much more alert. Without speaking, I take the cuffs of of her and bring her into my arms. She’s taken by surprise at first and can’t decide if to push me off or hold me. 

“I didn’t mean it, what I said” 

“Hope” I breathe in tears. As soon as she realizes what I’ve said, she wraps her arms around me and let me cry “I didn’t want this Jeri. I didn’t want to push you away, I didn’t want to keep it from you but you have to understand that this is why I had to. I can’t lose you Jeri. I just can’t” 

“Tobin” 

“No Jeri, you think I put Alice in danger, that I lied but I had no fucking option. This squad that I built, we all knew the price and you are not a price I could pay. So I kept it from you knowing that it would cost me some but it was some that I could handle. But now Hope…Kelley, I can’t repay a life Jeri” I cry against her as she stands frozen. 

“Hope knew”

“They were going to get engaged” I chuckle with pain and tears “Can you believe that they both had rings ready, they were going to propose on the same fucking day” I cry. 

“Oh my love” Jeri’s shaky voice whispers as she nuzzles close. 

“We are going to drop you and Michael off back at Citadel and then”

“Tobin, don’t do that, not yet” Jeri begins

“He was right you know” 

“Who”

“Your father” I breathe as I pull away and begin to compose myself “He warned us about them. But I didn’t listen” 

“Don’t do that to yourself” 

“I didn’t listen when I should’ve”

“You can’t blame yourself for not trusting when your past has proved that trust is dubious” Jeri points out. I nod before fully parting myself from her. 

“Theres a hover craft ready to take you and Michael” I report and begin to head out the door. 

“There was just water and lightening” She breathes causing me to stop at the door “All I remember is water. Consuming me alive, in my lungs, in my head, all over me. The lightening made it impossible to listen but when I did, it just sounded like static, everywhere. Just buzzing. And maybe it was just my ears ringing from the water inside but Tobin, Huros…it wasn’t there” She whispers. 

“When you crashed, what did you see” I ask as I lean against the door. She takes a few steps back and sits on the table she just was cuffed to minutes ago. 

“Just metal flying, lost of lighten, ripples of… of I don’t know in the clouds and water” I nod and leave the subject at that. I take my hand and lift her chin to meet my gaze. Tracing my thumb over her bruised cheek, I cringe. 

“Have you seen yours” She smiles and I nod no “I’m sorry” 

“Me too” 

We walk out of the room and down to the hover crafts. Once we are ready to head out, I order Theo back. 

“I’m going to need you more here than anywhere else” 

“Be safe” 

“You too” I reply before shaking his hand in gratitude. Going back into the hover craft, I take my seat next to Becky and Jeri and let my head rest on the chair as we take off. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SOOOOO?!!!!


	10. Missing Pieces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Theres a lot to share and say so look at the chapter notes...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been gone for a while due to a lot of unfortunate events. I never gave up on this story but I never had the will to upload either. The funny part is that I wrote it almost all out... upon finding out about Super coup (yeah I fell into the fandom too, just posted the story Creed... have 1/4 of the story written out so that one I will try to stick to) I logged in and clicked on this stories comments thinking maybe there was still time... I was in tears. You guys are simply the best. I can't not finish this one. So Heres a spam. I'm writing out a few more and funny I have the ending written out... so now I vow to stick to it. Hopefully, finishing it all during spring break. Stay with me peeps, we're almost done. 
> 
> If you're interested in my life than go on and look at the end notes haha

Missing Pieces

**Alice’s POV**

I don’t understand whats going on. I do, but I don’t. I’m smart. I know I am. Mom told me so. Toby thinks I’m smart too. As does my other mommy, Jeri. So why is everyone running by me? I know we’re in danger. I know both mommy and momma are out saving the world. But why do they think I’m not strong enough to face it? 

“Alice, dear, come here” Auntie Amy calls me over. 

“Yeah” I ask as I hop over a box and reach Auntie. 

“Come sit here little one” She orders me. I get on top of the box she’s on and sit besides her. 

“Yes” I ask again, unsure of what Auntie could want. 

“How are you feeling” She asks. It startles me. In a time of…well, whatever this is, I’m shocked to be asked such question. _How I’m feeling? I’m fine? Why would I not feel fine? I’m in one piece, I have both my mommy’s, no one I know is dead…so…I’m okay, right?_

“I’m okay Auntie, you” I ask. She looks at me with dubious eyes. Unsure if she should believe me or not “Why do you think I’m lying” I ask. Now it is she who is shocked. 

“Well, dear, this…is a really hard time… for you” She tries to explain.

“For me? Why” I ask still unable to understand “But I’m okay? I’m alive. I’m here, with my loved ones. My baby cousin is safe, you are safe, Ashlynn is safe, all my aunties are safe. So why must anyone be not okay?” 

“You’re okay” She breathes with relief. 

“I am okay Auntie. I’m okay, and as long as I have this, I’ll be okay” I breathe as I grab onto the ring Tobin gave me “Momma said that she would always come back as long as I had this”. When Auntie Amy looks at it, her eyes seem to do a double take. As if shocked that I have it. 

“That she will” She whispers before hugging me. I’m confused but her embrace is warm and welcoming, and in the moment, I feel like things will be okay. 

* * *

 

**Carli’s POV**

My hands shake in subtleness as I sit in the hover craft. I’m unsure if it is the nerves, the sight of Tobin and my friends alive or simply my owns fears. Ash’s dictating voice is in the background, yelling and mauling everyone for letting Jeri go. But it wasn’t in anyone disposition to make a move besides Jeri. After all, she’s the one Tobin needed. 

“Mrs. Lloyd, a phone call” Someone rings me. I nod and look to my right and pick up the phone. 

“How is she” Allie’s desperate voice rings. I shake my head at the inability around here to keep things to themselves. 

“Allie”

“Don’t you dare try to keep me out of this”

“She’s alive okay” 

“Is she hurt”

“Has she ever not been” 

“Okay” 

“Okay” I breathe. She hangs up the phone as do I and lean my head against my locker. _Why can’t we catch a break._

* * *

 

**Ash’s POV**

“How is she” I hurry Amy whom closes the door behind her. 

“Good” She replies vaguely. 

“Has she eaten”

“You know, we all get that you’re frustrated but if you would try a softer approach, maybe everyone would be more willing to comply to you” Amy mutters. 

“You don’t have a-”

“What? An idea of what you’re going through? Why? Because I left the forces? No hunny, I have a child to take care of. A gosh damn living human that needs me. A family to care for. You merely have an image of a women you love. Someone who doesn’t know you, who doesn’t need you. So do not come in here trying to play yourself the victim because you’re not. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have things to check up on"

* * *

 

**Allie’s POV**

“Pacing around isn’t going to help” Jose sighs as I make a turn on my unmarked line of walk. 

“Theres nothing else to do” I breath as I continue pacing. 

“Al” 

“Don’t” I whisper as I momentarily stop at the softness of his voice “Please just”

“Le, she didn’t need you there. She needed you here” 

“For what” I breathe “Amy is the one mainly taking care of her, I’m just here, basically driving myself insane” 

“Only because you refuse to acknowledge that you are more value here than you are there with her” Jose voices so freely and tenderly. He wraps his arms around me and I give in. My mind fights but my heart knows he’s right, “You want to protect her, I understand that. But she didn’t choose you because now, theres a part of her more valuable to protect, and that is Alice. Without her, there is no return. She trusts you to take care of her only given reason to live. Not Alex, not Jeri, not Ashlyn but you. So instead of pacing and beating yourself up by wondering what you could be doing right now, try maybe actually doing something and letting time live it’s will. Alice needs you just as much as Tobin does right now, don’t forget that” He kisses the side of my head gently before letting me go and walking out of the room. I let out a deep sigh before opting to lean into my husbands words. 

* * *

 

**Alex’s POV**

“What do you mean you can’t tell me” I yell at Carli as she arrives. 

“Look Alex, I’ve been lenient enough letting you come here, now, if you don’t get out of my face I’ll have you sent back to the fucking safe house you hear me” She hisses as she pushes me aside and continues forward. It is true, Carli has been lenient with me. Allowing me here in Citadel where everything is happening yet nothing seems to be happening. But still, I have the right to know where Tobin is, where my sister is. Right? _Right…_  

I shake my head in frustration and begin to look for Ash. I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t admit I was nervous. How could I not be? She a wreck in the moment and probably hates my guts but still, I continue. 

“Hey Amy, have you seen Ash” I ask as I find her grabbing some coffee by a food station set up. 

“You just missed her, she is going to the training center I believe” 

“Thank you” I half smile as I get moving. 

“Alex” She shouts after me, I pause and turn “You’re stubborn than most but maybe, don’t go looking for her…maybe just, don’t” She breaks it to me before grabbing her cup of coffee and leaving. I want to ask why, but I don’t. I turn back and continue. As I reach the training room, I see Ash sitting on a box. Pushing the door open, I walk inside and slowly make my way to her. 

“Ash”

“What are you doing here” She interrupts my greeting. 

“I just came to see if you knew where I could find my sister, or…if you knew anything about Tobin. Everyones been keeping me in the dark” 

“Oh would you look at that, a taste of your own medicine” Ash replies very coldly. I do my best not to snap understanding that she is, after all, in a very remorseful state of mind. 

“Look, I just came to see if you knew anything but if you don’t I will leave you alone” As I begin to walk away, Ash’s bitter words strike hard. 

“Jeri is with Tobin, as she should be” 

* * *

 

**Becky’s POV**

As the medicine starts to kick in, I watch Tobin fall asleep. Though what I have done is by all means illegal, Tobin’s been through enough today. Standing up, I reach behind Tobin and pop the small dart out of her neck. I keep the dart in the palm of my hand and open it slightly for Jeri to see. At first, her eyes seem conflicted but after a few seconds, she nods in gratitude. 

“Thank you” 

“It was what was best” I whisper as I place the part in my pocket and take my seat besides Tobin’s sleeping body. 

“It could’ve been me” I inform Jeri out of the blue. 

“Excuse me” 

“I could be dead, I mean, Tobin wanted me to lead the recovery of Ali but I didn’t want to leave her side” 

“It doesn’t make you a bad human to feel relieved of that possibility” 

“But it does make me guilty” 

“Aren’t we all” Jeri breathes. I nod in agreement and continue my empty stare. 

“How are you so composed? You just lost a friend” 

“But Kelley lost her future” Jeri points out. As the words leave her mouth, my mind springs awake. 

“Or did she” I whisper as I get up from my seat and rush to my medical office. 

“What is it” Jeri asks confused. 

“We need to get to Hope first” I order her as I begin to gather elements and all that I can. Jeri rushes out the door and for one second in the last 24 hours, I feel like I just might be able to fix one damn thing. 

* * *

**Sydney’s POV**

“I think its best if I inform them sir” I reply. It take him a few minutes to agree, and when he does, I hang up the phone. 

“Awaiting orders” An agent informs me. 

“Clean it up, no letting any of Kardia’s agents near, the board has agreed to it as well, I am on my way to meet Carli and Abby now. Tobin is headed to Citadel, we should be there at the same time” The agents nod and quickly disperse amongst the scatterings. Taking a deep breath, I do as I had do countless times on the battlefield. Pick up my helmet and walk away. It doesn’t take long to reach Citadel and when I do arrive, I find myself a bit lost. _Okay Syd, you can do this._

“Ex. Agent Leroux” An agent of Kardia greets me off the hover craft “Right this way” 

As we hush inside, I brush the dirt off my suit to be slightly more presentable. He leads me through halls I once roamed until we reach a room “They are inside waiting, a bit confused and agitated I may add”

He leaves in a hurry and I sigh. With a few seconds to muster some courage, I open the door and walk in. 

“Syd” Carli’s confused voice questions. 

“Hey you guys” I force a small smile. Unknowing how to continue, not knowing how to lay down the hard news “I think, you should both sit” I start off as the door clicks shut behind me. Locking me inside with the two who knew Hope the best, aside of Kelley. 

“What happened”

“Sit, both” I repeat with a bigger voice. Abby glances at Carli before moving to the chair. 

“Wheres Tobin, why isn’t she” 

“Tobin, Jeri, they’re both fine” I interrupt “Its”

“Well spit it out damn it Syd” Carli’s frustration and pleading voice forces me to take a deep breath. As I open my mouth to speak, my phone rings and I groan. The name on the screen stops me and I quickly pick up. The words seem to come in through one ear and exit out the other. It’s only a 28 second call but enough to stop time. 

“Who was that” 

“I just came to inform you both that the delivery of Jeri and Michael have been postponed, only for another few hours” I half lie before exiting the room in a very unconvincing manner. 

* * *

 

**Jeri’s POV**

Becky shelters me against the heavy winds of the Hover craft as we run. I see that we are running on top of ruins, of whats left of part of the city, and a part of me hurts. While I was never really for the forces, Axiom was my home. Memories, friends, family, it’s all Axiom. But me? 

When the door click shuts, Becky’s body leaves mine and runs. Everyone’s running inside a very beaten down building. Yet I remain standing, trying to scan my eyes over everything, trying to piece what happened.

“Commander Jeri” An agent snaps me back to reality “I’ve been ordered to escort you to another location where you will be transferred to Citadel” 

“Transferred to Citadel? On who’s orders” 

“Where is she” Tobin’s fuming voice roars through the ruins. It all happens in slow motion as she rushes to the area Becky is at, as she tears the plastic walls to see what she fears, as hatred drowns her barely beating heart. I want to call out for her, want to hold her even closer than before and tell her I was a fool.

And so I do…but my call for her is no stronger than the hands that cover my lips. 

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

Becky’s frail body comes in to clarity as my heart begins to beat out of my chest. Her eyes plead me to calm down before my diamond releases another dosage and wipes me out. 

“Is she” I glance at the door and Becky nods yes. A small but sufficient amount of relief sparks a moment of relief in my bones before returning to it’s heartbroken state. 

“It is a miracle that she has a pulse, weak but enough to get us to Citadel and proceed” 

“Good, I want you and Syd, along with everyone else to head back” 

“Listen, Tobin, theres something you must know” Becky interrupts me. She glances at the door and immediately my body senses the absence of someone “Theres been another incident and, it kills me to inform you that” Becky pauses with tears in her eyes and she fights her breaking voice “Jeri’s been taken”. 

I hear her loud and clear, but can’t react. Her mouth begins to move but my ears ring. _What is she saying to me?_ I ask as I try reaching for her. The tears that spill from her eyes, I want to brush them away but I can’t. _What’s happening?_ I ask as I close my eyes. _I’m swirling into an episode of darkness._ Except, I see nothing, just myself. Falling down, as if I were drowning. Simply watching my body fall through ripples of nothing, drowning into an abysses, my body unmoving. _What does it mean?_ I ask myself as I try to get a better glimpse of myself. But I can’t, I’m stuck at this distance, unable to reach my own body. Unable to discover the meaning of this episode. When I jolt back to reality, I can finally hear.  

“I’m so sorry Tobin” Instead of talking, I take her hand in mine and give it a squeeze. 

“Its time” I breathe, sitting up and sighing. I grab my coat set on the nearby chair and turn to look at Becky “We aren’t going to get any closer to recovering Jeri or Ali by mourning our failures. They’re counting on us to get them, and I am counting on you to get Kelley her future wife back” I breathe before exiting the door. 

* * *

 

When we land in Citadel, everything goes as expected. I lay the news that Ali was captured, break the heart of my close friend and watch Alex’s eyes fill with fuel. Ash doesn’t bother to raise her hand at me this time, she simply shakes her head and locks herself away. 

“You didn’t think to consult this option with me” Allie breathes fire at me as she enters the surgical room. 

“It is my body” I explain as a nurse finishes drawing some blood. 

“Why are you going through with this” Allie begs of Dr.Emmett. 

“Because she has requested it, and as her doctor…Allie you have to understand, her shoulder is already lost” Emmett sympathizes for me.

“You know what you are giving up Tobin, you know what this’ll mean” 

“There are no more forces Al, there are no more bodies to transcend into…I’m at peace with it” 

“We are ready” Emmett informs me. I glance at my best friends pleading eyes and sigh. Pulling her into me, I kiss her forehead and whisper a good bye. She pushes the agent off of her as they try to get her to leave but it’s of no use, I know she won’t leave. 

“Let her scrub in” I order. 

“Ready” Emmett half smiles at me as he prepares to inject my diamond. 

“As ever” I reply. 

“In 3…2…”

* * *

 

The one never comes, just like the peace after war or the sun after rain. When I wake up, I feel the disconnection between my mind and body. I know it is there, but my body knows its not. I feel my body spasm as it mourns a partial loss, as my central nervous system shuts down in search for the tissue that has been removed. The stinging, the numbness, the completely and utter pain free sensation is much powerful than I had anticipated. 

“Your body will come to terms with the loss, until then, it will continue to send shocks of electricity to your shoulder. Nothing to worry about, the new…improvement…is designed to counter stop the electrical pulses so that you feel no pain” Emmett explains. 

“And my diamond” 

“It accepted the new change” He smiles, relieved that nothing had to be altered beyond expected. 

“And Allie” 

“Still mad” He replies as he goes over to his bench to grab some tools. 

“And the rest…” 

“I think, they all knew something like this would happen. Given your courage, I would say, it was meant to happen” He walks over to my left shoulder. As he begins to remove the bandages, I am met with the sight of skin rather then metal. _Is that…_

“You didn’t really think I was going to let it show did you” He laughs at my surprise. 

“But, how” 

“As Becky and Ali said, we can grow cells…not tissue” 

“Wow” I breath amused at the sight of my new shoulder. He runs a few tests on its movements and shows me my new abilities, including the surprise that only the shoulder was rebuilt and not my entire arm as I have expected. 

“Everything from you elbow down is yours, up and all the way to where shoulder joint and collarbone meets is hybrid. Both flesh and metal. Other than that, you are full functional” Emmett smiles. I take a second to breathe, to embrace this moment as there is no going back. 

“So I’m ready to go back” 

“That was your wish and, well, it’s been granted” 

“Emmett” I stop him as he readies himself to leave “And you, why were you against it” I ask. He doesn’t seem a single bit surprised at my ability to foresee peoples emotions. 

“I was for this surgery, but not under these circumstances…I fear that your desire was made final not for your own well being but for the capacity to go out and end this, once and for all. You couldn’t do that with your shoulder before, but now, theres nothing stopping you” At that, he excuses himself to leave and I lay in my hospital bed. 

* * *

 

“You’re an idiot” Ash breathes as she enters my office. I furrow my brows as I turn away from the window mirror to look at her. 

“Excuse me” I ask as I finish buttoning my shirt. 

“You just got out of surgery and now you’re leaving…mind that, you also made sure no squad member was deployed with you” 

“There is no timeline for salvation Ash, they are counting on me to rescue them” 

“And you have a region that is counting on you to tell them that things will be okay” 

“I can’t tell them such lies” I reply as I tuck my shirt in and grab my vest. 

“Tobin, listen, it was wrong of me to punch you but”

“I never said I didn’t deserve it Ash. I know what I did” 

“But it was wrong of me, you did it to protect me. I see that now, but let me protect you Tobin” 

“I can’t let you do that Ash” I breath before sighing. I sit down in my chair and stare at the picture of my squad on my desk “I spent my life thinking I was protecting my region, protecting my squad but truth is, you were the protectors. And when time came, and the roles filled. I failed. It is my fault that Ali and Jeri were taken. No one elses. So let me protect you guys Ash. Just this once, let me do my job…by myself” I finish putting my vest on and shut down the room. As I begin to walk out, Ash stops me. Her lips tremble but she stands firm. 

“You forgot this one” She points out as she fastens and tightens a strap I missed. 

“Thank you” I reply. She lets go and salutes me. 

“Ash” I try but she continues. 

“Commander Heath, I will be at your service and vow to follow your orders. Now, and as I had before” 

“Agent Harris…thank you”

“Good luck” She smiles as she puts her hat back on. 

“You too” I breathe before exiting the door. It would be a lie if I didn’t confess that I feel different. It could just be my mind and body still adjusting to my new shoulder but being stuck in a body that has haunted me for so long, I know it’s more than just that. It’s acceptance, vulnerability and fear.

Turning the corner sharp, I exhale deep, reminding myself who I am, and what my purpose is. _I am Tobin Heath, daughter of none, prodigy of some, protector of the people and a nightmare to darkness. I am Tobin Heath, and my purpose is sacrifice._ Reaching the door at the end of the hall, I prepare for an outburst from my squad knowing well they are enraged. 

“Better get going” I hear a voice I wasn’t expecting to hear. Turning around, I see Hope in a wheelchair with a very forgiving Kelley behind her. 

“You fucking idiot” I breath with some relief as I retract from the doors and walk over to her. 

“She’s stubborn” 

“I’d forgotten” I reply to kelley with some happiness. 

“Come here you bastard” Hope laughs as we embrace. 

“I’m glad you’re okay” I breathe as I squeeze her lightly. 

“Me too” She laughs and we part. 

“Becky figured it out” 

“Had we had her on our team from the beginning, maybe Carli…” 

“It’s in the past Hope” I say while placing my hand on her shoulder “I’m just glad that you are well and back to safety” 

“You don’t have to do that Tobin, you couldn’t stop it, no one could have. Things happen Tobin, and it is not your fault. It is their fault. Zane’s and no one else’s, so you go out there, get some fucking battle scars, gain some ground and get that fucker and come back for the wedding” Hope orders me in all seriousness. _Wedding? What wedding…the wedding._ ** _WEDDING?!_** I watch kelley rest her hand on Hope’s shoulder revealing the engagement ring. Hope slowly raises her hand to hers, showing off her own engagement ring. 

“Finally” I whisper through some tears as I embrace Kelley. 

“She asked” 

“I know” I laugh as we part.

“Not as romantic as we planned but it suited well I think” Hope reveals making Kelley punch me. 

“You were helping her too” She breathes in fury 

“Wait you were helping her” Hope looks at me and I begin to laugh hysterically. 

“And this is why you both deserve each other, congrats you two, you both deserve happiness” I smile as the two share a moment between themselves. 

“Get on now Tobs, a revolution awaits” 

“Or better yet, an evolution” I breathe before leaving and beginning my way to what could be, my last meeting with my squad. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1: Cars are dangerous. Seriously, please always be safe and aware of your surroundings. I was in two consecutive car crashes in a matter of 4 days during winter term. Both accidents resulted in both cars being towed, the emergency room and physical therapy. I wasn't at fault for either accident but truly, God or nature or whatever you guys believe in taught me that sometimes... even if we're steering the wheel, our lives aren't in our hands. Thankfully, I've recovered now and suffer shoulder pain every few circumstances but I'll take it over death. 
> 
> 2: School is crap. I hate school. Actually, cross that, I love to learn but I hate the educational system of higher education. I failed almost all my classes winter term due my new formed anxiety with driving (I literally couldn't drive for nearly two weeks without breaking down) so I would skip class. When I did go, I just couldn't focus for many reasons, a lot with the teacher and the lack of support from them when I asked for help. 
> 
> 3: The president sucks. Guns laws suck. America needs change. (random but I thought I'd throw it out) 
> 
> 4: Oh guess what! I got into EMT school so I'll be on that work grind for a few months but I'll be racking up hours for Med school! Aye!!! 
> 
> 5: Ya'll theres so much more but I don't want to spam you too much. Leave comments and please, don't hate me for taking this long hahaha much love, and again, thank you for everything. You have made my week.


	11. Safe Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alright, gonna pick it up now, many POV's next chapter, I'm hoping to get the story done at 15 so four more chapters full of INTENSE scenes. No Tobin/Alex interactions but LOTS of reminiscing on both of their parts. I also want to give major disclaimers going forward of Death, tragedy and violence.

Safe Now

My nervous hands grab onto the door handle tentatively. Unsure of how to handle this gathering. From the bottom of my heart, I wish to walk into the deployment building without a glance at a single one of them but knowing myself well, I will most likely memorize them from head to toe until my watch beeps and I board the ship. Not wanting to lose time, I open the door with my eyes up high. 

Shock, pain and…pride hits me all at once as all my entire squad stands before me in uniform. Along with Tim’s, and other agents both old and new, suited in their Gala uniforms, doing, what I had only seen once with Christie, an honorary goodbye. 

“You can’t leave without a goodbye” Jeri’s voice rings in my ear, but when I turn, I don’t see her there. 

Mustering the courage left within me, I move forward. As I walk by they salute me. Reaching the end of the walk way, Carli awaits me. 

“I thought I was an enemy of the state” I joke as I bow my head to her and the world leaders. 

“Don’t play it safe, you still have trail” Abby smiles as she moves aside to reveal a very constructed and sophisticated man whom I never thought I would ever actually meet.

“President” I stand tall and offer a salute to a man I had only ever seen on TV and through video meetings.

“ESS Heath, what an honor it is to meet you” He greets me as he extends his hand. 

“It is mine, I never thought I would meet you given the vast speculation over the past year” I joke as I extend my on hand to meet his.

“Well, I am glad to be able to relieve you of your doubts Scout. It was also time for me to come visit our neighboring region as you had visited ours” He points out as he raises a brow with a smirk. 

“It was quite the experience Mister President” He laughs as do others. 

“Call me Leo, short for Leonard” 

“Leo” I nod and he smiles “So what brings you in” 

“Well, news got out that thee prestigious Scout of Athena was heading out in search for our own squad members, a Kanatos citizen and a…very important individual and I thought I’d come myself to declare our region in full support and at your service” It takes me a second to process his words as never before has a region bowed to another. 

“I understand that is a lot but maybe, accepting his offering would be a start” Abby whispers. I nod my head shocked and thankful. 

“Sir, that” I stop yet again, unable to continue.

“Very unheard of yes. But, theres no time to talk reasoning. When you get back, we shall discuss the details out. But until then, we want to give you something” Leo reaches behind to one of his men and retrieves a box. He opens the box to reveal a token for my uniform. The token is the Anthena logo, but remade. A closed gold Laurel Wreath replacing the triangle that once represented the forces and the fine pulse representing Kardia redesigned to incorporate a thin circle that holds the pulse within it. I am impressed by the simplicity and beauty of the remodeled logo. I glance up to see Carli smirking and Leo smiling. 

“Times are changing Tobin, faster than imagined and by extremes we never could’ve seen coming”

“Wow” I breathe as he places the fine box in my hand. 

“The wreath represents all that protect us. Each fine branch reminds us that Agents aren’t the only ones that have to protect us. We must all work together to protect our regions. The circle is separated from the wreath to remind us that after all, you are **not** bounded to fighting for us.  While it is your job to protect us, it is also your job to maintain, correct and help build the regions until you find a peace you can live with. Furthermore, the circle is connected to the ancient Kardia symbol because it is time we all unite together. Kardia for years has led the modern world and so, it is only ever right that you, lead us into our future. You have displayed, proven and shunned the world. You have been more than what has been asked and by far, the greatest heart is in you. So I, Leonardo Valintine the fourth, President and leader of Kanatos, declare Kanatos armed forces to be under you command. Our nation and yours, at your hand and visions. Now and forever, until our regions fall” As soon as the president stops speaking, all the agents, both from Kardia and Kanatos kneel, Carli included.  It takes me two-seconds to register what I have been named and what I have been given, but as well, the mission I have been assigned.  Without more thought, I take the token and pin it in the middle of my vest, in full display.  A cheer thats full of pride, honor and happiness rings and in that moment, my heart momentarily stops.  But without much to offer, I inhale deep and let their emotions tease my own. 

“I, ugh, can’t thank you all enough for this…honor. I, ugh” I pause and let my thoughts simmer “I’m simply thankful, and promise to do whatever I can to bring justice to our regions. If we were strong on our own, we shall be invincible together. Thank you” I finish very awkwardly. Nevertheless, they cheer and Leonardo turns to me. 

“May all the goods of your actions protect you”

“Thank you” 

“And make sure to give that son of a bitch a good kick for me” Carli half jokes. I fake a smile and search the now flowing sea of agents in search for Allie. 

“I’m here” 

“Always are” I breathe as I turn to look at her.  Though she’s not yelling at me, her eyes do scream. There’s no point in offering words as we both know that at lot is at stake and time is not of the essence. We embrace and I do my best to swallow the now forming doubts that arise within in. She lets go, but not before kissing the top of my head. 

“Take care of Alice” 

“You already know” She replies. I offer a small smile before looking towards the awaiting men I selected and give them a nod. They begin to walk in the directions of the door while I search for someone in particular. 

“She’s, ugh, she’s not here” Allie brings my sight back to her. 

“Well, you guys are safe now…that’s all that matters” I leave Allie with that and walk towards the door. People part ways for me and soon enough I’m pushing through the door, not a single glance back. 

* * *

**Two Weeks Later…**

Emmett was right when he said I wouldn’t have been able to do this without a new shoulder. It’s only been two weeks and my body is struggling. Day in and out, we search the region, we swept Axiom clean in only two days but after two long weeks, hope is dying. 

“Waiting orders Scout” My closest man to a right hand speaks. 

“Tell the men to rest up, those out in the field, retreat, we are done for the day” I breathe. He is surprised with my order but eagerly leaves to give the men some good news. As the door closes behind him, I lean into my chair and darken the glass side wall of my office with the wave of my hand. Letting out a heavy sigh, I bring the small evidences that Zane’s men have left behind. I rotate the 3D blue prints of the actual scanned evidence, trying to figure out if they give us any lead but ultimately can’t piece it at all. 

“A call from…Allie Long” My temporary AI system tells me. I nod my head no, declining the call as I have for the past two weeks. When Ali’s voice rings through the system as she leaves a voicemail, I pause. 

“So, um, I was just calling to let you know that Alice knocked out her first tooth…” Ali pauses and I close my eyes in defeat “I don’t know how you or Jeri would want us to approach this…I’m not all that good at this but, you know, you never believed in the tooth fairy, any less Santa Claus, but um, I think it would be good for her.  Anyhow, I better let you get back to work, Jose and Ashlyn are out at the Lake with Alice so they’ll all be hungry. I love you Tobin, and I hope your safe” Ali hangs up and I let out the air I was holding.  Every time Allie calls, it gets harder not to answer, especially when she cries.  While all the cells in my body ache to answer, my tender heart knows it’s only best that I keep focus on the mission. Sighing in defeat, I close the hologram and grab my phone and head out my office. Walking through the developed hover craft, I focus my attention on the ground until I find myself at my private gym. Once there, I walk over to the medical cabinet and grab a cable. I sit on the chair and connect the cable to the wire and allow the hologram to appear before me. Selecting on the tab ‘heal’, the cable lights up in blue and I watch the levels of my arm quickly settle where they should be. 

“Equilibrium established, anything else Scout” The temporary AI asks. I unplug the cable and opt not to answer it. 

I soon get lost in my training.  Punching every dummy, cutting every hologram, shooting every shot until every myofibril in my body swells from the hard stress. As I begin to get up from the ground the door to the gym busts open. I meet eyes with my right and it’s enough. I’m springing to the door, my muscles no longer in pain but rather in fuel. 

“What is it” I command as I enter the room. 

“We have a lead” An agent shouts as he brings up the screen. It is the camera of a street and city far out, near the boarders of Kardia. The bakery name behind them gives away their location… _I’ve been there once…_ The agent rewinds and plays the footage. Immediately I catch glimpse of Ali for the first time in weeks. My heart beats out of my chest as I look at the corner of the screen and see that the footage is of yesterday. _She’s alive,_ I breathe with slight hope and relief.  Soon, Zane pops up and the anger is back. I let the footage play once before asking the agent to rewind.

“Slow it down” I command as I watch her get out of a car along with a few agents. The little peanut and her look physically untouched but her eyes give her away. I let the footage continue but again, ask for a rewind. 

“What is it” My second hand asks, I shake my head as I move take charge of the controls and rewind, slowing down the part where she exits the car. 

“Is there any other angle” I ask as I pause the screen. Agents shuffle around for a few minutes before someone finally gets something. 

“Its from the shop across the street, not all clear but can see a tad bit more of the subject” He speaks. I nod and let him bring it up and run through. At blind eye, it was be as nothing but I see it quite clear. I take control and rewind back to Ali and slowly play the clip. 

“Shouldn’t we focus on Zane… not” 

“Shut it” I hiss as my eyes focus on hers. _She’s blinking…more than normal…it’s a…_

“A code” My right hand shouts as everyone begins to analyze the code.  I stand there replaying the video over and over again, trying to convince myself that I am somehow messing up elite squad members code and spelling out the wrong word. 

“Its … _Frost_ ” An agent says in unison with me. I rewind the video one last time and write out the word as she blinks… F…R…O…S…T,  FROST. Crystal clear, theres no way I could get it wrong. 

“Nadine must’ve taught her elite squad members code just in case of an emergency when they were together” I speak out loud in thought. 

“What does that mean” My right hand asks as everyone lays eyes on me. 

“It is not what is means rather who it is” I reply with my head down. The room falls silent as the failure sets in “It is pointless to send a squad out… be on alert…our battles are approaching” I speak before resorting to my office. As the door closes, I lock the door and fall into my chair.  _They have managed to take everything._ ** _EVERYTHING._** I slam my fists against my desk with wet, burning tears rushing down my cheeks.  My fists throb from the force but I scream out of a pain not felt in my hands. “I failed you, I failed you Frost, how could I forget”

Allowing my body to fall forward, I let go. Letting everything fall apart as I come to realize that I am failing, that I always have been. “Micheal was right…we focused on the wrong things. I let them take everything, Ali, Jeri, Zane…Frost…” I stop as I the truth comes spinning in. _They don’t have everything…if they did, they would’ve ended everything by now but they haven’t…why is that…._

Standing from my seat, I wipe my tears and bring up a hologram and begin. 

“Ali… she’s a doctor who studied some of our injections…. Zane… insight, had my trust….they needed Frost…to piece things together, from Ali to Zane, data, everything… Jeri…they needed her for…what do they need her for…” And like that, I’m running out the door. 

“Commander” My right hand hurries after me. 

“Bring up the footage again” I order an agent as I come running into the command room. 

“On it Commander” 

“What is it” My right hand asks as I stand at the railing, looking at the screen. 

“They are in Axiom still” I breath as my eyes focus on the screen, taking in every pixel that makes it up. 

“That’s impossible…we swiped it clean” 

“There” I stop the footage to the sigh on the street “Meldives Bakery, search it” I order my men. 

“Meldives Bakery…on…it’s…theres two locations, Netaos and…Axiom” The agent confirms.  I look to my right and stare at my right hand. 

“They needed Jeri not because they wanted to wound me out of spit but rather, they know that if anyone knows Axiom, it is her… At first I couldn’t piece where they were going because it didn’t make sense, why be on the move” 

“When you can gather yourself in one place without wasting so much energy and resources” 

“Exactly” I confirm. 

“So, would you like us to warn the others” 

“No… no bring up a board” I order as I make my way down the stairs of the command room, leaving the balcony and roaming around the floor. I enter the empty space up front as a board rises from underneath the floor, stopping just before me. 

“Something still doesn’t make sense” I comment to myself. 

“Why expose themselves now” 

“It’s just…they were under our nose, why not ambush us then” 

“They weren’t ready” 

“So if they weren’t ready two weeks ago…whats changed” I ask as I turn to look at the agents around me. 

“We’ve been on the move” An agent shouts

“We have but think…apart from us, what’s going on in Kardia that we’ve been missing on” I ask as I grab a marker “Well? Anything” I ask with an eye roll.  Immediately agents get to work, a bit confused but nonetheless, efficient.  I take a step back once we’ve brained stormed just about everything that’s happened in Kardia since we left.  Staring at the board I skip the ones we highlight as important. 

_Retraction from Axiom_

_Restoration of parts of the board between Axiom and the outside_

_More help to the towns in need_

**_Kanatos President remains in Kardia_ **

_World Tech in pursuit to develop better technology for threats and combating them_

**_Michael Morgan on Trial_ **

“When is the president set to return to Kanatos and when is Michaels Trial in specific… any word on what exactly World Techs is developing?” I ask my men feeling rather confident that we are focusing on the right details. 

“The Kanatos president is set…to leave… in a week” An agent makes in known 

“And no real clues to what World tech is developing, if you would like, we can hack into their system”

“Michael’s trial is set to begin tomorrow, Commander” As soon as the words slip out of my right hands mouth, it all pieces together. 

“Get everyone off the ground, we’re going home” I order as I head back to my room.  Taking a seat, I shut my office down and lock the door manually, figuring I have nothing to lose at this point.  I open up my vault and grab the only thing that seems to make some sense at the moment, The bible Tobin gifted me.  Settling into my chair, I prop a page open and begin to read…

 

_Lord, when doubts fill my mind…_

* * *

 

**Alex’s POV**

It’s been almost a month since I laid eyes on Tobin.  A long month without her voice, her eyes, her humility…her love.  A month of anxiety, stress, the sensation of nothing and everything.  A month of endless crying and breakdowns but most importantly, a month without any progress. 

“Alex” A knock at the door brings me out of my thoughts.  I turn my head and find Amy there with a tray of food. 

“You never stop do you” I ask as I get up from my chair and walk over to take the tray from her. 

“Nope” She chuckles as she hands it over “Do you ever stop” She asks as I walk over to my table.  Shaking my head no, I hear her sigh. 

“I figured” 

“Listen, Amy…you don’t have to continue taking care of me you know, this isn’t your-Right” I chuckle as I turn to meet an empty sight.  Closing the door to my bedroom, I walk over to the small table besides the window and begin to munch on the dinner Amy made.  I admire the moonlight that sneaks into the room from beneath the curtains, finding its reflects on the floor beautiful.  _People are so scared of the dark that they fail to realize all the light it holds._ Finishing up the dish, I walk over to my bathroom and loss myself beneath the water.  

This has been my routine almost everyday since we arrived back at the safe house.  By myself, in my room, with little to no contact with anyone.  In occasions I catch a glimpse of Amy’s son or Christen but nothing from there on.  No one comes to find me, not even Alice.  I suppose it’s because she doesn’t know or she’s kept busy to ensure she doesn’t ask questions.  _It doesn’t really matter anyways._ I shake my head and turn the water off.  I step out and into my robe, slipping into my slippers as well.  I head into my room and see the door slightly open, the tray off food gone and my pijamas set. _Amy is such a mom…_ Smiling ever so slight, I walk over to the door and begin to close it, that is until Ember startles me.  I yelp in surprise as she pushes the door open and walks inside.

“EMBER! MY GOSH!” I huff as I hold the robe to my chest “Goodness! Wow! Some sort of preview would’ve been appreciated” I speak to him, expecting him to reply.  He doesn’t move a muscle, as expected. Sighing heavily, I nod okay. Closing my door, I walk over to my drawer to grab fresh clean necessities before settling into bed.  Ember, as dubious as always, watches my every move. 

“Alright bud, well… you can either stay there the whole time or come join me” I speak to him “So what is it” I finally ask.  He stares at me for an entire minute before making his way over to the other side of the bed and hopping on. 

“You are something else you know” I smile as he nuzzle besides me and rests his head in my lap. Again, no response “Well, seeing that it’s only 10…I’m going to read so if you’ll just wait here as I” As soon as I begin to move, Ember growls causing me to stop “Or I guess not” I reply as I settle back down. _I can read on my tablet?_ Trying my best not to upset Ember, feeling as though he needs the rest, I quickly reach for my phone and bring up the web. 

“What should I read little guy” I ask the not so little copper pup. He looks up to meet my eyes and I feel a sudden sadness for him. _He misses her too._ Running my hand over his head, I type in something I never would’ve expected to ever read. The bible. Clicking on it, I slide my finger and allow it to stop on a random page. 

“Let’s try this” And so I began to read the verse…

 

**_Lord, when doubts fill my mind…_ ** _when my heart is in turmoil, quiet me and give me renewed hope and cheer._

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

As we approach our destination, I order the hover craft to a stop at a town about 10 miles out.  I give the men a rest as I go on to prepare myself.  After a long shower, one that could be the last for weeks or even time, I begin to get ready.  Slipping on thermal legging and tight undershirt, I reach for my black combat pants that are tight at my ankles and slip them on.  I reach for my bullet vest before putting on a black long sleeve.  Tucking in the shirt into my pants, I button them up and proceed to grab my leg holster.  Securing it on my left leg, I get up and do a quick move.  Nothing as though everything feels okay, I grab my black jacket and zip it up. With a quick shift, I put my backpack on and strip it on. After fastening my black boots, I make sure the new Athena logo is visible on the sling of my backpack on my right shoulder. 

“Done” I sigh deeply as I stare into the mirror. I move my head to my right and take a look at my diamond “Still there…still working” I remind myself. Facing myself once again, I take a deep breath and put my hair up into a low bun before going into my safe to grab one last thing… my black PDX hat.  Putting it on, I smile, “I am…Tobin Heath, and my purpose is…sacrifice” 

* * *

 

My team of just 9, including myself set off from the hover craft. We load our backpack with food, water and ammo.  The weight of my right gun holstered to my leg and the one in my arm feel light. My heart beats with anticipation and determination as we approach our destination. The agents at first were not all that thrilled about the light armor I ordered everyone to wear, including me, but ultimately, it’s the best way to enter Axiom undetected. 

“4 miles down, 6 to go, we have to reach Axiom before sun down” I order the men. We begin a light jog which to me is a breeze, to them, not so much. I get lost in the environment.  Find it beautiful untouched. Soon enough, we near two miles. I order at halt for everyone to rest. Attaching my gun to my backpack, I walking over to my right man with a laugh “You’re winded?” 

“Oh shut it” He laughs as he sips on some water. 

“Take 10, it’s all the sleep you’ll be getting tonight” I command as I walk over a left behind vehicle and sit upon it. Slipping my bag off, I stretch my muscles.  They burn in all the right places, fueling my mentality.  After a minute or two of stretching, I raise my right sleeve up to see my watch.  My left shoulder vitals read well making it ease to shake off some nerves.  I pull a granola bar from my backpack and fuel up before getting the men back on the run. 

It takes us roughly 18 minutes to arrive.  We come to a final halt a quarter of a mile out of monopati bridge, scanning the East side entrance of the city.  As my eyes look through the binoculars I pick up no heat signals nor radio waves. 

“Must be on the other side of the city, we will take no chances though, prepare to enter the city under the bridge” I order my men as I am quick to get my harness out. 

“Mike has the bridge drawn out, he’ll go first followed by you than I, the rest will follow” My right hand comes over. I nod yes as I fastening the last belt and lock my rifle into place. We quickly move towards the bridge where Mike and a few others have already started their climb on the side of the East side bank of Axiom.   

“This would seem easier if Axiom was surrounded by water and not by a 100 foot fall” One of the agents remarks. 

“Oh, but that’s the fun part” I smile as I walk past him and to the side of the bridge. 

“Coast is still clear” I hear in my eye piece as I attach my harness to the carabiner and rope. 

“On the bridge now, lets keep a stead pace, it’s a good sized bridge, I want to be clear within 10 minutes in case they have a watch set out” I order as I begin to climb. While the circumstances of this particular activity are rather harsh, the act of climbing has me rather thrilled. It’s not something we get to do for fun as agents. It’s usually a hike or climbing onto buildings or structures in the battlefield but this…it just classic climbing. I’m roughly 15 feet behind the agent in front of me and roughly 20 feet in front of my right hand giving me much needed space to do my own kind of climbing and hanging without having to stress anyone.  My right arm is starting to burn from all the hanging while my left arm feels nothing, so I try to put all the weight into my left shoulder. 

“Commander” 

“Yes” I speak as I hear the slight concern in the voice of Mike. 

“There’s a slight problem…I may have just triggered a bomb” Mike tries his best to speak without fear. 

“Okay Mike, don’t move…I’ll be there” I quickly signal my right hand over “I need you to gather the others and keep moving forward, Mike and I will catch up as soon as I deactivate the bomb”

“I have orders not to leave you behind”

“And I’m the one whos right here giving YOU orders to go, so do as I say please” My right hand takes a moment before nodding okay. He hurries before me as I wait for everyone to pass before setting off behind them. As I reach Mike, I see his left hand on the edge of the bridge, two feet planted on the side and his left hand dangling from the side. 

“Well, what do we have here” I ask as I make my way over to him. 

“I feel a button under my left hand, I’m not willing to let it go until you investigate what it is”

“We’ll, I’m here now so just breath in and out and focus on not letting go while I get up to go check what is going on ight, Mike” I address him. He nods yes and I take a moment. As I begin to unhook myself to the rope he panics. 

“Whoa whoa what in the hell are you doing” He yells. 

“Relax Mike, I’m just unhooking myself to get more room to prop my head up, I’ll be fine” I chuckle as I continue to untie the rope, once undone I look at Mike who had remained silent “I take it you aren’t much of an adrenaline junky” 

“Not the much” He replies as I secure my hands on the edge of the bridge. 

“You know bridges, I know that much about you…tell me more” I order him as I take a deep breath and pull myself up. 

“I was an architect, before enlisting” He speaks making me raise my brows. As my eyes reach the edge and see Mike’s hand resting on nothing but a scrap metal, a smirk begins to form. 

“Oh yeah…well…Mike…I need you to do me a big favor” I breathe as I reach my hand over to his and unexpectedly push it off the edge. Mike lets out a scream and I a good laugh as I watch him dangle. As he realizes that indeed we’re alive, he rushes to grab back onto the wall “I need you to relax Mike, you’re going to get wrinkles” I chuckle as I begin to tie myself back up. 

“Very funny” He mimics with a relief. 

“Indeed it was” I laugh as I fasten my harness and meet his eyes and see them full of curiosity, of longing for answers.  

“How are you so calm about this” He asks, his vulnerability showing. I take a second to get into a comfortable position and grip onto the rope as my feet touch the wall and I dangle over the trench. 

“I’m not comfortable…I feel out of place, Axiom was never a home to me…but it’s hard to feel anything but safe right now…We’re not getting shot at, you just gave me a good laugh and well, I don’t know about you but that sunset is really starting to paint pictures on the walls so…tell me, how can you be uncomfortable right now” I ask as I look at him. 

“You’re not like anybody else” He points out as it’s clear as water and air. 

“But at what price…It’s not who I am, rather what I do. And yes, I might be slightly different with all my advancements but I choose to believe that I’m only the first, and not the last” And with that, we’re off to meet the last rays of the sunset at the end of the bridge. As my right hand pulls me up and over, I stop to glance at the sun and it’s send off. 

“What a beauty” Mike expresses with adoration. 

“What a goodbye it is” I smile sadly before ordering out men into the dark as night sets upon Axiom. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's getting closerrrrrr yassss


	12. Solo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, this is a short but needed chapter. It will start off in the morning (of the day) and progress and than there will be a shift back to the start of the day. Hopefully it makes sense, it should, but if it doesn't I apologize! Aye, we're picking things upppppp!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhhh!!!!

Solo

**Alex’s POV**

I wake up in an uncomfortable peace.  Ember, whom I didn’t expect to see besides me still when I woke, is stretched out upon my bed, his head nuzzled into my side.  His coil fur in a neat mess, waiting to be patted down.  With gentleness, I reach my hand over and begin to slowly run my hand through his curls.  He’s awake, but as still as a newborn.  As I begin to massage the back of his ears, he begins to peer his eyes into mine. 

“Well goodmorning pup, how’d you sleep” I smile with some laughter.  He seems to understand my question as he nuzzles his head further into the bed “Agh, well…if that’s a sign for nap number two…count me in…I don’t want to be awake…today or tomorrow or” Before I can finish, Ember stands up and repositions himself to give me more room.  I let out a laugh at how complying he is “Okay well no, I’m sure if I even tried to stay in on this particular day, Amy would come in and drag us out”  

On spot, Ember lets out a deep sigh making me smile “Same buddy, same” I let out as I pat his head “I would do anything to miss out on today…I feel so, alone. I know Amy has been helping or well, trying to be there for me but it’s not the same…I’ve lost everything. My mother is, who knows where, probably avoiding the media and my sisters and I. Jen isn’t even all the thrilled with me, or anyone. My father turned out to be-” I pause a second to hold the tears threatening to escape but slowly begin to fail “He’s no father at all” I say with a breaking voice.  Raising my hand to wipe my eyes, I begin to break down “And Jeri…Jeri’s gone and she might never be back” I cry with a pain so deep. Burring my face into my hands, I begin to let it out.  Letting everything built up inside fall into my lap and onto my bed. Ember who has been nothing but patient and restrained takes me by surprise, settling his head in my lap, nuzzling his nose into my arm “The hardest part Ember, is knowing that I let the love of my life leave without a proper Goodbye. I let her go Ember, I let her go knowing that it would as well be the last time I’d see her… I let her leave thinking that I- I let her go Ember” Embracing Ember, I simply cry.  He doesn’t move, doesn’t fuss, doesn’t make a sound.  He stays still and simply handles it.  

When I begin to calm down, I pull myself away from him.  Embers eyes quickly link into mine and fill me with a warmth I haven’t felt in forever. “You miss her too and I’m sorry Em…I wish I could just, hear her voice one last time or just, anything from her…even just the smallest sign of life would do me so well” I breath out as I reach over to grab my phone to check to the time.  As I begin to unlock it, Ember bumps his nose into it, knocking it out of my hand. “Hey there, be nice” I chuckle with a stuffy nose. 

As I pick up my phone and unlock it, Ember knocks the phone out of my hand once again “Hey! That’s not nice…what do you want me to do? Put it away?” When Ember gives me no response I sigh, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be mean but what do you want pup? I need to check up on some things before I tackle on today” I explain. Ember seems to get the hint and he settles down once again.  He waits patiently for me to finish but as soon as I try to set the phone down, he barks. 

“Okay Ember, what’s your deal with my phone” I ask a little annoyed now. He stares at it and than at me, as if trying to explain something.  With furrowed brows, I stare into his eyes, seeking for an answer, a response as to what he desires. _What is it Ember…what could you possibly want?_

* * *

 

**Abby’s POV**

As I finishing buttoning my shirt while looking into the mirror, I hear Sarah’s sigh. 

“I know what you’re thinking” I speak out loud, knowing quite well where she stands on this. 

“I still think this is a bad idea” She expresses with gentleness. I move to the side to meet her eyes through the mirror.

“Look, Hope is the World Tech’s President now, I have no say in their future and I haven’t in a while so”

“That’s not what I’m talking about” She interrupts me as she repositions herself to be sitting on the bed, holding the sheet up to her chest “Are you ready for this Abby? You’re not just dealing with any ordinary trial here… this is Michael we’re speaking about. You built-”

“I’m more than capable of separating laws and emotions” 

“But are you strong enough to” 

“If you aren’t going to support me, the doors wide open” I snap knowing the bells I’m ringing.  She closes her eyes, sucking her lips in and shaking her head ever so slowly.  I watch, as she stands and leaves, opening the door that was closed, and like a fool, I watch her.  Not a movement to stop her, not a step forward. 

* * *

 

**Becky’s POV**

“This is…surreal” I breath as I stare out the window and over Citadel. The only place trusted to hold Michaels trial as everything else seemed too risky. 

“So this place” Hope hums as she wheels over to me in her chair. 

“Like home” I laugh sarcastically. 

“More like hell” Syd murmurs as she comes around be my side, resting her elbow on my shoulder. 

“I’m convinced we will never get to leave” Theo comments as he stands to Hope’s right. I turn my head to meet their eyes, seeing all the emotions we compress within.  The burred worries, the daunting question, the lingering hope… 

Every since Tobin’s been gone, we’ve all be on edge. Syd has spent an abundance of locked away while Theo has been going in for traumatic therapy, and Hope, she’s been in physical therapy with Emmett and I.  As for myself…I’ve been going to therapy too.  Or well, until a week ago, when all four of us got arrested. 

A knock at the door causes us all to turn to the door, we watch Abby among lawyers and prosecutors of Kardia come in with fancy suits and cases. 

“Be seated” Abby commands as she reaches the head of the table in the middle of the room. 

“The irony” Syd chuckles with dark humor, causing me to bit my lip in delight. 

“Whats so funny” Abby demands, with an ignorance I thought had vanished. I quirk my eye at Hope whom shrugs her shoulder. 

“Nothing…just that…Michael used to say that to us in that same exact tone and place…or was it Sepp” Theo explains as he leans back in his chair, glancing my way. 

“Equally said by both” I reply as I smile at Abby. She holds my gaze and I catch her struggle quite easily. 

“Enough” She demands “You are all accused of betrayal to Kardia, aiding in acts not cleared by the World leaders and” 

“Just give us the contracts and we’ll sing” Syd interrupts bored already. As Abby opens her mouth, I interrupt. 

“We’ve been locked up for a damn week, shoved into this room for the last 28 hours and are aware of our actions and damn well know that testifying against Michael in court is the only way of clear our names so just do what Syd says and save us some time, will ya” Abby lets out a loud sigh before nodding her head. Within seconds, a thick packet of paper is placed before me, a shiny metal pen and a big x on where I am to sign. 

“Boy oh boy…this is a thick as my”

“Shut up and sign Theo” I order not wanting to be around Abby much longer. 

“Alright alright there” He fuses as he tosses the signed packet at a prosecutor. Shaking my head, I sign with annoyance and slide it over to the man with the case. Hope is readily the last one to sign, nevertheless she does. 

“Good, now, the chips will be removed and you’ll” 

“Chips?! What chips” Syd demands as she begins to look at everyone. 

“Relax Syd, they were just injected in case” Abby tries to explain 

“Oh you did not violate my body while we were passed out, I swear” She’s quickly shut up as an agent attaches a device to her diamond and locates the chip within her body, right on her forearm. Another agent, without much  patient, removes it causing me along with others to cringe “MOTHER FUCKER I WILL” Within seconds, the agent whom removed the chip sprays an anti-bacteria and numbing medicine over the open wound before placing a new patch I haven’t seen before. 

“Keep this on, the small cut will seal within two days” The agent explains before moving on to Theo, Hope and at last, me. I watch the agent whom was rather quick with the others take his time with me. My chip happens to be on my left tricep, not allowing me to watch his cut and precision. Nevertheless, he’s quick and efficient. 

“Thank you” I remark as he finishes putting the patch on me. He catches my eyes and gives me a small smile before getting up to place the blooded gloves and wipes into a specialized disposal bag. 

“Now as I was saying, you’re all free to roam this entire floor, we have set rooms up for each of you, certain items for entertainment, a kitchen for you to cook and clothes in each of your rooms. You shall remain here until your turn in the trail comes up. Until then, two visits to the therapist for those who need it, Hope, you will find a tablet in your room with specialized exercises for you to do to continue your rehabilitation along with a small gym for all of you to use.  You are no longer tracked by chips but are monitored by surveillance. Until then, we will also monitor vitals and have check ups. No access to internet and such, nothing can ruin this trial or seem…iffy. Furthermore, you will find that hacking systems is not an option as we have…modernized the entire floor back to a very contemporary style back in the day. Kardia thanks you for you sacrifices and cooperation, you are now free to roam and free from charges” And with that, everyone shuffles out and sight. 

“Soo.. let me get this straight, we signed a thick ass contract with Kardia to go from prisoners to prisoners with personal rooms” Theo asks annoyed. I let out a sigh with an eye roll. 

“What could we have expected…its Citadel” I murmur as I stand up. 

“What was up with Abby” Syd gets straight to it with Hope. 

“Dunno, haven’t seen her like that…in a while. Usually when we were on the verge of a break through or when we were struggling. But never that intense” Hope confesses with a shrug. 

“Whatever it was, it’s definitely going to fuck up her judgement today” Theo points out. 

“Well, not like we can do anything, come on, lets check this new floor out” I differ. Everyone nods as we proceed to the door, Theo, the gentlemen he is, wheels Hope without her consent. But she accepts it. 

* * *

 

**Allie’s POV**

“Auntie” Alice’s voice brings me out of my daze. 

“Yes dear” I ask as I shake off the nudity of my struggles. 

“How long are we going to be away” She asks as she finishes picking up the last of her blocks. 

“I, ugh, it depends hunny” 

“On what” She asks. 

“Why are you so curious” I ponder as I search her marvelous eyes from the sea. 

“Tobin used to tell me to replace my fears of the unknown with curiosity and Jeri said that when you are curious you find a lot of interesting things to do” Alice explains with a small hint of sadness as she longs for her adoptive mother. I stare at her long and hard, wondering how she is NOT Jeri and Tobin’s biological daughter. _The girl is a mirror replica of them both._

“Well, my love, never lose your sense of wonder” I respond rather than answer. She smiles happily at me before breaking eye contact at the sound of the front door ringing. 

“Cousin Ryan is hereeeeeeee!” She screams as she leaves the blocks and rushes inside. I laugh as I run behind her to the door “Ryannnnn” She greets him with a hug and he giggles. 

“Hey there” I laugh while I side hug Amy. 

“Goodness, they get louder and louder don’t they” She breathes sadly as she closes the front door. 

“If only they would stay as small and innocent like that forever” I respond as I catch sight of both angels running to the backyard. 

“If only, so when do you guys head out” Amy asks, quickly getting to the subject of the day. 

“Well, it’s only 7am, we head out around 9 and the trail begins at noon sharp” I breath unexcited. Amy’s hard stare makes me groan “I can’t leave her here Amy, Tobin left her with me. She stays with me.” 

“What do her God mothers think” 

“They have no say in this, plus, Ashlyn’s actually on board as she’s traveling too and the other one well, we all know how she is, she won’t even be attending” with that, I walk off, not wanting to speak about Alex anymore. As I walk out the door and onto the patio I find Alice and Ryan playing in the grass with a ball and Starlight. _Where’s Ember?_

* * *

 

**Carli’s POV**

Taking a deep breath, I open my eyes and tug my suits blazer closer before opening the door in front of me.  I step into the court room feeling all eyes on me.  As I make it to my chair, I stand behind it, not willing myself to look up just yet.  Glancing to the side, I see a Jason besides me, a World Leader of Kanatos giving me an assuring nod. 

“Ladies and Gentlemen, the World Leaders of the New World, you may be seated” The bailiff orders. At this time, everyone takes at seat. It is only than that I raise my head and meet those permitted into the public. A grand few spectators whom will be witnesses of this historic trial, the press who is without a doubt drooling to see the ending, family members of the defendants and Alex, along with other important leaders and civilians, including Kanato’s President. _WAIT. ALEX. ALEX IS HERE._

My eyes brush up on her details, soaking, memorizing and retracing every part of her, questioning my own sight as she sits in the front row of the court room. She is seated between two body guards wearing a very casual but sophisticated black midi skater dress with a thin leathered belt hugging her waist. Her hair is pulled back into a nice curled high pony and her make up detailed but natural. As if she was completely fine, but she’s not. I catch Hope’s surprised sight and we swallow the empathy together. I find some of my old comrades, such as Kelley, Lauren, Kristie, Christen and Allie but no one else. No sight of Pinoe is shocking. 

“The court has begin after rules, process and all procedures of the trail are concluded” The bailiff explains. As the Judge begins to speak, my eyes don’t leave her figure. I know it is wrong, and she has a right, but down in my heart, I know she shouldn’t be here. She is the one and only Morgan present for Michaels trial and might as well be the only one left. Jenifer is far from Citadel, her mother…not known where and Jeri, could be as good as gone. I continue my empathetic stare until I’m called on by the bailiff. 

“Carli Lloyd” The judge commands as he knocks his gavel against his desk. 

“Yes, your honor” I speak as I stand. 

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

I wake up to the sound of my phone ringing rather than my alarm.  After going through the incident with Mike, I thought it wiser to settle down for the night rather to try and get a head start. Without looking at the phone, I bring it to my ear to hush it up. 

“Hello” I whisper, not wanting to wake anyone up. I hear a gasp on the other end and am immediately struck in shock of the owner’s voice. _Alex, she’s okay._ I think as I take a deep silent breath, holding it in to keep from saying anything, scared she’ll vanish, scared this dream will end. 

“I, I um, I don’t, I didn’t, I” She stutters, unable to form words, unable to process or cope or even accept that I answered. That somehow, I picked up knowing well I haven’t answered anyone in weeks. I allow her the time she needs while I too take my time to breath, unable to speak with a dry mouth. “I just, I thought, that if I called, you wouldn’t answer, I didn’t think you’d answer, I thought, that maybe you were gone too and it was a sign for me to let this all go, but you” Her voice falls silent and the tears begin to fall. _She thought I was dead?_ “You answered. And now…now I just” I remain mute, not willing myself to cut her wings or take her moment to find peace. How could I do such thing after everything? _After all I’ve cost and done to her, how could I interrupt her breakdown?_ “…I don’t know what to do.” Her cry shreds me into thin pieces, burning a desire to run, to sink to the ground and never resurface, for she does not cry for me, rather she cries over loneliness. The longing for answers, the wonder of what happened, the dear desire of closure. A cry I have cried far too many times. “I don’t know how to feel Tobin, I just, everything feels like too much. Everything feels so empty, so fucking cruel and I just, my dad is being tried for treason among an abundance of other felonies but I can’t help but long for his acceptance still. He essentially helped with Jeri’s kidnapping as well but I still….I still care about him” She whispers the latter causing me to clench my teeth. I feel empathy, for I nor anyone should carry the burden of true love “Does that make me wrong” She cries. I grip my blanket and continue my steady breathing, unwilling myself to speak “…And now I’m calling you when I shouldn’t be but Ember” _Ember?! What is Ember doing with Alex? They barely ever tag along with each other?_ “He slept with me and he misses you…he’s actually the reason why I called” Alex chuckles sending my heart into flutters. I close my eyes and bite down on my lips as I imagine her and Ember cuddled up. _Fuck…_ “I, I’m sorry, I should get going and should be leaving you, I just…Goodbye Tobin” 

“It’s okay to care for someone even if they have wronged the world…including you, but it is not okay to let them commit the same wrong twice” And with that, I hang up the phone, knowing what my next move must be.


	13. Only

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am back. Here it is, just 3 chapters to go. (MAJOR WARNING: Deaths)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, I needed a lot of time to decide if this is what I wanted. To make sure all that is about to happen is what I wanted and to embrace the truly beauty of Tobin. For she will go through hell as will Alex and every character...

Only 

 

As I finish connecting the wires, my heart pounds hard against my chest. Forcing itself to be heard by my conscious, forcing me to bare the weight of my decisions.  Once the bomb is set, I straighten out my back. It is done and can’t be undone..at least not for a couple of days. Gathering up the bag of weapons I took from my agents, I swing the bag over my shoulder and inhale the bitter aroma of the city. Light barely creeks over the towers and into the streets. The world is merely waking up as I begin my journey, leaving the men assigned to protect me behind. When they wake, they’ll discover I’m gone and realize I have trapped them. Not as a betrayal but as a necessity for the greater good. 

Upon hearing Alex’s voice, it has occurred to me that I can no longer take more. I have been given so much, but returned so little. Now I must repay the blood, sweat and tears. Only then will I ever be able to mend part of my own broken heart. 

Adjusting the brand new Kardia Pin on my backpacks sleeve, I take off, blending in with the destruction of the city, finding comfort in its flaws. 

* * *

**Becky’s POV**

The first one pulled from the group is Theo. He walks out of his room in a rather odd uniform. Instead of a suit, he opted for black skinny jeans, black pointed boots, a black turtle neck, topped with a leather jacket. As he realizes I’m staring he shrugs, “I took privilege of the small amount of freedom we have” he explains. I nod and watch as he walks over to the agent at the door and turns around, allowing himself to be cuffed. He turns his shoulders ever so slightly to display a pin I would’ve never imagined. It reads, “Ni-key”, _the Goddess of Victory_ …or as we in the elite squads knew her, _Athena’s charioteer in battle_. I allow the small smile to form on my face as I glance at Syd who smirks. 

“Atta’boy” She hollers as she takes another bite of her food. Theo laughs at her comment and proceeds to follow out the door. Hope lets out a deep sigh causing me to look her way. 

“He’ll be alright” I assure her. 

“But is she” Hope’s soul peers into my eyes. I look away unable to think of where she must be. If she even is, or if she ever was. 

* * *

 

  **Tim’s POV**

I lay eyes on my friend and soak in his growth and glow with pride. He defies the tradition of a suit and opts for a touch of diligence with his attire. As we all stand wait for him to reach the podium, I meet eyes with Allie. She must feel pride as well as she lets out a small smile. The judge proceeds to grab Theo’s vow of the truth and only the truth before ordering everyone to sit. 

“The court is now in session” The bailiff speaks. We sit through an essential five hours in which Theo is hammered for his crimes. The judge, irritated with the defenses approach, orders a break. Giving everyone, especially Theo a much needed break. 

“Why are they doing this, this is Michael’s trial! Theo has been forgiven!” I hear a civilian across the floor curse. 

“If only they understood” Rimando comments. 

“We all know the Judge won’t really consider much of the testimonies” 

“She should’ve testified” At his comment, I look over at Alex whom stares out the windows of the building. Her back is to us, shielding her of all possible triggers. 

“She’s going through enough” I remark as I turn away, not wanting to add to the eyes that see. 

“Do you think she’ll end the trial alone, without her family” Rimando asks as he moves to stare out the windows. 

“She’ll be the only one left standing after this trial” I finish the conversation before heading off to grab a quick snack. 

Once our pass time is over, we compact the court room once again. The defense continues to go after Theo for a solid 6 hours until finally, the Judge orders a halt to their attack. Everyone breathes as the Attorney of Kardia begin their interrogation. 

“How long do you think this will take” I hear someone say behind me. Their voice weary but their anticipation strong. 

“Who knows, could be another 10 hours” 

“It’ll be short” I interrupt them as I slightly turn my face to give them a glance. 

“How could you be so sure” 

“Because the longer we sit here, the more Kardia bleeds” And with that I return my attention to the Attorney. 

* * *

 

**Theo’s POV**

We’re an hour and a half into the attorney’s examination when the attorney finally addresses my so called crimes. It’s a simple question, one that is not leading rather open. And it is, by what I presume, my last question.

“Do you trust blindly” The attorney stares at me. It strikes me simple but of so complicated. But my answer is simple. I remove my leather jacket to reveal the pin, and just like that, the ball drops. The room fills with gaps and silence…the first person to their feet is Allie. She applauds, with pride, with tears and hopeful heart. Everyone slowly rises, including Kanatos’s president whom nods a honorable nod my way. 

The judge quickly calls for order and I am sent back away. To many, my action might’ve come out of stupid but to everyone who’s ever served…I have defied Michael and all that he stood for. _I got your back Tobin, always._

* * *

 

**Tobin’s POV**

By mid day I have scouted quite a lot of Axiom, finding little success but much needed self peace. The fallen buildings and rubbish lying around make Axiom quite honestly beautiful. The silence of the once busy streets, the fallen of a once golden city…its sad but oh so innocent. 

As night begins to set, I enter a building that seems to be rather destroyed. Collapsed over on top of another building, but somehow still standing. Pushing some rocks out of the way, managing to make a small entryway for myself. Taking a small glow stick, I bite it and crawl into the tunnel I have made. Once though, I cover the hole. Upon finishing, I let my body fall onto the rubbish pile of dirt and rocks, feeling jabs in all sorts of parts from the rocks underneath as my body settles. I lean my head back and let out a deep sigh.  Feeling the frustration kick in, I throw the glow sitck into the oblivion of no end and listen for its impact. The sound it makes, one of shiny metal sends me to my feet. Running over to the glow stick, my mouth falls agape. Quickly removing my back pack, I grab my tools and begin to pry the cover of the tunnels below open. 

“AGHHHHHH” I yell frustrated as I pull with all my strength. I hear the clicks in my shoulder and soon enough find myself lifting the cover off the ground it was imbedded to. Open I clear the top, I drop the metal bar and stare into the hole, “So this is how you guys moved around…” I breath out. Wiping the sweat from my forehead, I begin to get ready. I grab a cloth from my bag and tie it in the way of a headband and remove my coat. Not wanting it to make any noise. I opt to keep on my armor best and short sleeve shirt, hoping that the tunnels are warm. 

“This is it Tobin, this is all we have left” I speak to myself, prepping to go down, tying the ropes that will lay my feet to the underground. Lowering me to their level, lowering me into my destruction, lowering me to my demons. 

I tight up one last knot before rising. Taking a moment to embrace the stillness of air, I attach myself to the rope and descend. The journey is long, longer than I had hoped but within 15 minutes, I’m toughing dirt. I quickly pick up my rope in the dark and quickly turn on night vision. As soon as my mask clears, I see the width of the tunnel. _Impressive._ Is all I can think as it’s wide enough to drive a car through and have space for a side walk. Not allowing myself to take too much time, I holster my rifle up and begin down to the right. 

No sure of where I’m going or what these tunnels were built for, I begin to implant small bombs every 2 half a mile. Eventually, when I get to 4 miles, I hear voices. Looking around, I find cover in a bin full of garbage and await. 

“The sooner they talk, the sooner we can get the hell of out here” A man’s voice speaks in the distance. 

“We’re still in charge of destroying these tunnels” 

“At this rate, we will be here for weeks…they still aint talking” A third man adds. 

“Shut the hell up, you all know what happens to people who talk” Another man, one of higher authority I presume, speaks. His voice, while strong is full of fear. _Zane must rule with an iron fist._ I hear their footsteps closer and soon enough they’re walking before me. 

“Who’s turn is it to check the bins” The man whom spoke not so long ago asks. 

“Its Johnny’s”

“No! What the fuck! I did that last time! Why must I” 

“You listen right here boy, it’s your fault we’re down here in the first place. Had you not fucking hurt one of the girls we would’ve been on the front line now fucking hustle up and meet up at the check point” I hear the shove and fall to the ground along with laughter. Soon enough, 3 pair of feet disappear and the soldier on the ground begins to stand. 

“Johnny boy, Johnny this, Johnny that…no one fucking believes I’m capable…but I’ll show them, I’ll show EVERYONE that I can defeat anyone. Fuck Zane and his plan, I’ll tear Kardia down myself and anyone who stands for it” 

“Anyone?” I ask as I jump out of the bin, sending the boy back down to his feet. 

“WHAT?! WHO ARE YOU?! HOW DID YOU GET HERE, HOW” I holster my gun at him as he looks at my black helmet in fear, his gun, like any boy with a toy, feet away from him. 

“Didn’t you just say you would get through anyone who stood in your way” I ask as a joke. The boy, realizing who I am, reaches for his gun. Though exceedingly cocky, he is as stupid as any boy his age. I’m quick to paralyze his movement with my gun to his back “Not so tough without your toy” I laugh a little. 

“I could say the same about you” He mocks causing me to roll my eyes. 

“Look, last time a jerk say that to me, I ended up jabbing him with a knife so i you really want to” Distracted by my rant, he kicks my knee and sees no bulk “Did your mother ever teach you that you aren’t supposed to hit girls” I ask as I grab him by his shirt and fling him across the tunnel into a large bin “I was just trying to share a moment with you” Grabbing him again, I bring his face to mine, and clearing my screen of my helmet to meet his eyes “But you just had to ruin it…just like everyone you’re working for”

“Why do you protect the region that destroyed you” I boy ask as he spits blood to the side. 

“Because shit heads like you, who think that they are better than everyone else, keep fucking thinking that they know whats right. But I’m here to tell you and all of Zane’s fucking men that this is done. I am taking Kardia back and I am taking ANYONE and EVERYONE who’s done wrong to the innocent” 

“And what about your family?! KADIA TOOK THEM, THEY TOOK YOUR PARENTS THEY” Before he can finish his sentence, the boy is electrocuted before me. I watch in horror as his body vibrates with power, frying the life within him. I turn to meet the eyes of the man who ordered him to scout the bins and feel a fire within me burn. Gently resting the body of the young boy on the ground, I stare at the man bewildered. 

“He was only a boy, a child, you sick bastard” 

“Speak for yourself, he was an annoying piece of shit” The man replies with no remorse.  I stand in my spot, clenching my hands, feeling my hatred consume me. Darkening my screen, I run at him. He attempts to shoot at me but I’m too quick. We fall to the ground and within seconds, my knife is to his neck. 

“Being against evil doesn’t make you good” He laughs at me as I push the edge into his skin. 

“I never said I was” And with that, I slit his throat. Letting go of his neck, I clean my blade on his clothes. Gathering myself, I grab the man’s walkie talkie knowing he must’ve alerted everyone that I’m here and groan.  

“Guess I won’t be resting at all now” I curse as I hear running coming near. Sparing no time, I’m on the move. 

I don’t know where I’m going, where the tunnels lead or who I’ll find. All I do know is that I’m one step closer and they’re not far behind. Finding that I no longer hear anyone running behind me, I take a moment to catch my breath. Quickly grabbing a bottle of solution from my backpack, I drink it up and hustle. Upon an hour of endless circles, water begins to cover my feet. 

“This must be the West side of Axiom…beneath…oh you are smart Zane” I think as I enter the knee high waters. Axiom was in terms of building their dam of none sense when the war unfolded. And now, all the water above has began to sink down. When the dam was finish, the Elite squads would be assign guard for the off duty but since it never happened, no one could’ve ever guessed this place to be equipped. 

As the water begins to reach my hips, I realize that my helmet is water resistant and bullet proof but not waterproof. The water will easily enter under my helmet. Taking it off, I store it in my blackpack along with my gun and pull out my knifes. Without my helmet, I can’t see in the dark, therefore, I power up my knifes. Allowing the light from the blade guide me. 

“May I find the end” I breathe  before beginning my swim. At first, its easy to swim under water for long periods of time, but as the atmospheric pressure increases, I grow tired faster. After what my clock reads almost 2 hours, I rise to the surface of the water and let my body float “My lord, they couldn’t just put a ‘Here I am’ sign” I joke with a weary body. I close my eyes for a few seconds, allowing the dripping from the roof clear my stress and ease my mind from its anxiety. The coolness of the water begins to settle into my bones and I realize that I’m freezing, that for the first time in forever, I am not invincible. _Just float away…no one would ever know._ I think as I shiver and see the my cold breath in the darkness of the tunnel. **_Or find the sons of bitches who did this._**

Minutes pass and soon enough, everything in me is still. Time, thoughts, pulse. I can feel my diamond radiating, trying to produce heat, trying, fighting to keep my insides warm but it’s pointless. And while I hate the feeling that is beginning to consume me, I can’t help but want to give in. _To no longer feel_. I slowly begin to stir in the water, washing off the bad thoughts that threaten to take me away. 

“Have to find warmth” I tell myself as I take a deep breath and continue. It’s hard, to push through the cold, to feel not a single atom of warmth but find your body on fire. Must be the will, the one people have mentioned I have, the one that has burned all innocent flesh from my skin, the one that is pushing me to swim faster. Soon enough, I find a door along the side of the tunnel and feel a spark. As I go to rise for water, I realize that the tunnel is completely filled and that I am going to run out of air. 

Without much strength but my shoulder, I put a blade in my mouth to light up the knob and pocket my other knife. As I put on the blade, I pull on the door. Finding that my muscle are tired and the water is creating a resistance against me. 

 _I’m either going to drown…or explode the entire dam on top of me._ I think as I grasp my feet to the edges of the little door and continue to pull, trying my best not to breath in. The knife in my mouth, to my amazing luck, begins to move as I bite down hard, cutting the right edge of my cheek. I groan in pain both from the cut and my arms but continue to pull as hard as I can. Willing myself to the last seconds of air in my lungs. My head begins to spin, I begin to feel the cold winning, my fingers letting going, but somehow, the door begins to move. 

As I get it open, I’m pulled by the current inside whatever is on the other side. The door slams shut begin me and I find myself in a small pool beneath the door. As I reach the edge, I intoxicate my lungs with air and slump over the edge. Letting my body float for a minute, I begin to get out. My head pounds hard against my cranium and I want nothing more than to make it go away. And just like that, I feel my diamond shot a dose of steroids into my CNS and quickly relaxes the pounding, also expanding the width of my lungs. 

Rising out of the pool, I look around and notice it’s a small deploy room into the tunnels. Nothing much to my use and nothing worth taking. After drying up the best I can, I decide to keep my gun away and put my helmet back on. 

“Alright, lets get back to it” I breath, opening the door that leads to my evolution. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...


	14. A

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please be warned that this chapter includes MAJOR deaths and signs of suicide. Please be aware that this will trigger some people. Nevertheless, I have made peace with the loss and feel as though it will all add up in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not put in who's POV every section is. I think as you read it should make sense who is speaking, hopefully!

A

Three days go by and it seems as though the trial will never finish. I sit, in the same seat, everyday. My eyes to my fathers back. My eyes on the evidence, my heart on the verdict. Syd’s cross examination took much longer than Theo’s and now we’re onto Hope’s. Hers so far is at 13 hours. 

“So, can you one last time confirm that not a single part of you thinks that ever so slightly, Michael Morgan was acting not on his own behalf but on behalf of his daughters who were manipulated by Kardia’s own Scout” My fathers lawyer presses Hope, one last time. I fist my hands into balls and know that Hope is deeply wounded and quite honestly shaken by the last 13 hours. _Come on Hope, please._

“I, I” 

“Your honor, leading question” The attorney of Kardia throws out. The judge, shakes off his opposition and orders Hope to answer. 

“I can only say that Michael knew his daughters were in great hands” And with that, Hope stands and exits the court. I hear necks crack and turn, in my direction with frustration. Hope, while strong for a majority of her testimony, just gave the defense team great leverage. _Fuck._

* * *

 

“Becky” I hear my name called. I rise from the couch and walk to the doors “It is now your turn” The solider informs me. I nod and turn around, allowing him to cuff me. He covers my eyes and takes me away. According to my calculations, it’s a 20 minute walk to the court. Once situated in a room, I’m set free and allowed to see. 

The room is small, but as always, white. I take a seat and tracing the embroiders of my uniform.  Gold. How ironic the color of honor, a color we sworn in when joining the Elite Squads but now, it seems dull. Nevertheless, I pride myself in my attire. To wear the first generation uniform, the one I worn as I was worn in, is to be talked about. A knock at the door and I rise to my feet. 

“Carli…you’re not supposed to be here” I question confused as she rushes in. 

“Theres no time to waste, I have 54 seconds before I’ll be tracked. Tobin’s gone MIA, she set up her own squadron, we just got word…I don’t know what is going on but you have to lengthen this out before” 

“15 seconds” I inform her as she talks. 

“Just…we need you” Is all she says before disappearing. Again, I’m left alone. Confused but all so concerned. I am given 10 minutes to prepare. When the door opens, I look at my guard, wondering why he has broken the law, allowing Carli to see me. I don’t question his motives though. 

As I reach the front of the door that will lead me into the court room, I close my eyes. Allowing myself 30 seconds to feel the dread, the fear, the horror and sadness within me. It strikes me harder than intended as I wipe away some tears and brace myself for the longest days to come. I hear a click and the doors open. The light burns my skin as I have been molded by an innocent darkness that is now in danger. As I walk to the podium, my steps echo, as everyone takes in my uniform. I feel a pride, one I’ve longed for, rush through my veins. Stopping at my seat, I raise my right hand and swear an oath to the court, the people and most importantly myself to be truthful in my examination. 

“You may be seated” The judge orders. I pull out my chair, settling in before looking up to meet Alex’s eyes. They yearn, they fear but most importantly seem lost. She holds herself high, as she always has, but it is then that I see Servando sitting behind her. _I wonder if she has noticed._ Not that anyone would say anything but his love is evident, but it is a new love. A love of friendship. I give him a nod before turning my attention to the defense team, meeting Michael’s eyes. He shows no remorse, no feeling, not a single drop of emotion. His expression makes me wonder, was this how he treated Alex? Was that why she is so broken? I can only imagine what kind of house she grew up in. Not saying that my life was any better but I can only be sympathetic to a soul I’ve come kind to. 

“Ms. Sauerbrunn, or may I call you Becky” 

“ESL Sauerbrunn or Agent Beck to you” I correct him, holding my head higher than before. 

* * *

 

The past three days are beyond what I imagined. The tunnels, the damn…it’s so complicated that I have become lost, mental, physically and emotionally. I feel as though I’m in an upside world. A disconnection, the pain feels welcomed in fights with agents. The shredding of life seems to roll of my sleeves. The tallies add up but the remorse does not. In truth, I believe Zane’s agents themselves know very little, and feel just as little as I. As when I come into contact with them in the tunnels, I’m quick to escape. Not to underestimate but it may seem that we are all in a dark abyss, except they’re only getting faster and I’m only slowing down.

A gunman, quite wise and precise managed to catch me off balance, forcing me dive into a random tunnel and landing on a scrap of metal. The incision, about 2.5 inches deep and diameter about 1.5 inches into my right hip. I have managed with my diamond’s medicine but I know it’s running out. Finding myself alone, I lean against the wall and take a second to rest. _How much longer?_ I think as I close my eyes, zoning out for just a few seconds. The silence is so strong that I hear the drops of water far to my left. At first, it doesn’t click, but soon enough, I’m running in the opposite direction. 

If the water is dripping through, it must mean I’m just below the dam. Therefore, an exit to the edge of the damn is close. I feel a renewed energy fill me, pushing me forward, numbing my body, fueling my strength. As I run, I listen take small breaks to listen. Continuing my search, I come across a door that heavily guarded. _That’s my exit._ I think as I stop behind a bin. Crouching down, I look to the side to count the men… _one…two…three…four….five…six…my goodness Zane, you really don’t trust just 2 soldiers?_ I chuckle a little as remove my backpack and fetch what I’m looking for. As I hold it in my hand, I feel a sort of sadness within me. _It’s almost as if I’m in the battle zone._ Shaking the heaviness off my actions, I harness my gun and prep my blades. Taking a deep breath, I throw the grenade in their direction and watch as they all brace for impact. When the grenade doesn’t explode, they approach it. Allowing me to click the button and attack. 

My helmet immediately goes into dark mode as I light up my knifes within the pitch black smoke, disarming and taking out every soldier. One by one, they try to fight, but all fail. As I punch one, I transfer the energy behind, stabbing another one and returning to finish off the previous. Their pain sounds sweet, their will to not go down without a fight leaves an impression. When the black fog disperses, I’m left standing with splatters of blood, I’m unharmed and amped. Walking over to the strongest of them all, I bring his face to meet mine. 

“How can you destroy a monster without becoming one” He asks with his last breathes. The question strikes me, but my answer seems to be at the tip of my tongue. Stopping myself, I take the keys from him and allow him to die all on his own. 

Moving to the door, I unlock it. Using a great amount of strength to get it open, but when I do, natural light blinds me. I have been in the dark so long, that the light has not only become unwelcome but also daunting. Nevertheless, I take my first steps into my destiny. 

* * *

 

Six hours have gone by and it seems as though everyones burning. The defense attorney has been burning through questions, much unlike his previous approach with Theo, Syd and Hope. It’s as though he is in a hurry. _But for what?_ I ask myself as I stare out the window during the lunch break. 

“Move away” I heard one of my guard’s order someone. 

“Alex” I hear Servando for the first time in months. As I turn to greet him, we embrace. 

“Not a day older” He compliments making me smile softly. 

“Not a day taller” I joke causing him to chuckle. We pull apart but hold hands, talking with vision, allowing me to breathe. 

“The suns out” He points out behind me, as he moves to stand besides me. 

“Storms don’t last forever” I breathe, soaking in the brightest of the light, wondering if Tobin is seeing the same thing. 

“Touche Alex, Touche” He repeats. I sigh at his reference and lean into his shoulder “I don’t think I would ever be as brave as you, being here, showing up, shocking the world” He confesses. 

“The bravest thing you have done Sev, is allowing yourself to love again” I point out. He turns to meet my eyes, confirming his worries that I know, “You have that glow to you…I’m happy for you” I breathe out with some longing for Tobin as I give his hand a reassuring squeeze. 

“She’ll be back, she’ll always come back to you…she always has” Servando speaks, returning his sight to the sun. 

“I hope so” 

“I know so” He ends the conversation as he places a gentle kiss on my head. And someone, in his warm gesture, I feel as though he is right. 

* * *

“DID YOU THINK YOU COULD JUST SHOW UP” An agent yells as I reload my gun. I’ve been playing cat and mouse with Zane’s agents on the dam for the past two hours. Though I wish I had a better cover, I know I’m out of options. _Either forward or down._ I tell myself as I get up to shoot again. I hit two agents but again, miss the soldier who continues to bicker with me. 

“FOR AN ELITE SCOUT YOU SURE SUCK AT AIM” 

“AND FOR AN ARMY OF MEN, YA’LL SURELY SUCK AT CATCHING ONE PERSON” I yell in frustration as I prep myself to shoot again. As I raise my gun up to meet the soldier, I nearly drop my gun. 

“Sasic” I breathe out in horror. She’s severely beaten, her face is the only thing recognition. 

“You shouldn’t have come Tobin” She breathes before receiving a strike to her stomach, wounding me just as bad as her. 

“Now that we have your attention, enough with the kitty games, allow us to take you in”

“Or” I ask before watching him shove Sasic in the direction of the damn. 

“Or, your friend here, takes a nice little swim…down there” He nods on the opposite side of the damn going down. Surely Sasic could survive the fall but with her hands tied, it would be catastrophic. I look into her begging eyes that scream for me to fight. But I have no will in me to put her life in danger. _I have sacrificed the lives of Zane’s men but I will not sacrifice her innocent life. They choose to fight._

Before I can respond, Sasic shoves the man, flinging him to the opposite direction. Her body flies forward as she is shot from behind. My feet push me forward, but I am no wear as fast as lightening. Bullets past by me, as I shoot at my targets, not missing a single one. As I jump off my feet, I grab onto Sasic’s clothes, catching her just in time before falling down. 

“GAWHHHHHH” I scream as my shoulder stretches, tearing the wound on my hip even more. 

“Let me go Tobin, you can’t pull me up” She begs me as she looks up to see me clinging at the wall, breathing heavy, trying to gather all the strength in me to full her up. 

“I won’t let you down Sasic, I won’t let that happen” I speak through gritted teeth. 

“I’m of no help Tobin, I’m wounded, as are you, I’ve done enough, I have lived my life and given my time…Get to the building at the far East side, where the damn ends…that’s where they are Tobin…Go…you have to before” And like that, she goes silent. A bullet rips through her heart from afar, stealing her of her future. Sending her off without a proper life. Her bodies weight nearly doubles within seconds and I know I’ve lost her. I scream in agony and pain as I pull her body up from the edge, finding myself crying as her body lands in my arms. I take my helmet off and meet her face. 

“I’m so…I’m so sorry Sasic” I cry into her lifeless body, finding myself wanting nothing more than to be dead. Bullet’s hit the side cement and I know I’m still being targeted. Pulling away, I wipe my face and look at her. “I’ll avenge your death, on your region and on mine. I won’t let them get away with this. I won’t stop until they all pay. Okay? And on the note, I never hated you. You were always an inspiration to me…You made your Region Proud Elite Scout Sasic. You made your Region a better place” And with that, I lay her body down and quickly remove my backpack, grabbing a white cloth and resting it on chest to cover to hole on her heart. Ironically, it has a Kardia symbol on the front. Pulling up my shirt, I run a finger through the blood of my wound and use it to draw out Kanatos logo onto the cloth before placing it over Sasic’s body. 

“May you rest in piece, partner” 

* * *

 

The court is in session when it is readily interrupted.  The world leaders are forced into a conference room very suddenly along with the Kanatos President. 

“I demand to know what is going on” Abby fumes as she pounds her palms into the table. 

“Chill those hands of fury Abby” I calmly order as I take a seat at the head of the table. 

“What is going on” Leonard comes to my side. 

“Sir” I stand as he sits. 

“Leo, Carli, its Leo… you all neglect to call me as such” He compliments in good manner. 

“Sorry, Leo…I’m not sure. The orders were not to disrupt the court for any reason unless” 

“Mrs.Lloyd,” a guard enters the room. I reach for the chip in his hand and he walks out the door. The room locks and the lights dim as I enter the chip into drive. Giving everyone a glance, I press play. 

Immediately voices gasp at the sight of Tobin. She looks no older than the last time we saw her but boy does she look like she’s lost 10 pounds. She’s malnourished and lacking the supplements needed for her high demands and diamond. If anything, I’m surprised she standing given the wound on her right hip. _She’s dying,_ is all that comes to my mind as the video zooms into her face, showing the confusion upon her face. As if she has never seen light in her life before. 

“Guard the fronts, gather the men this is” I raise my hand to silence a world leader as the video continues. The video cuts and we see Tobin being fired at for a few minutes. What makes me bite hard on my lips is seeing Sasic being brought out of a building to where Tobin hides. I want to press stop, I don’t want to see what I know in my heart is coming but I can’t. _I can’t bare to see her face when she lays her eyes on Sasic._

On cue, Tobin rises ready to end a life only to be met with her own death. She nearly drops her gun at she tentatively runs down Sasic’s body, afraid that even her eyes will crush Sasic. The audio is cut out and we watch, as Tobin ends countless lives and saves Sasic’s only for her to be killed by a sniper. 

I turn away as Tobin breaks, as she tears her muscles and stretches her bones to get Sasic’s stale body over the edge of the bridge them seem to be on. Bringing my eyes back to the screen, I watch, as Tobin leaves us without air as she gives Sasic an honorary goodbye, with her very own blood. The audio comes on and were hear Tobin’s last words, “May you rest in peace, partner” before the screen goes black. The words, “May you rest in peace” pop up and than vanish before the word, partner in capital letters is left dead center. The video ends and I stare at my feet, unable to react, unable to want to react. Someone from the table throws a glass cup of water at the glass wall and others sniffle. Abby, as expected, leaves to the bathroom slamming the door.

“This is not your regions fault” Those are Leo’s first words. I bite my lips as they tremble and shake my head no. 

“If…this, if this goes out to the public…at least the snips…it could be the end to our beginning as a united front” I whisper, not trusting my voice. 

“And we will fight, we will, that much we know, but right now, the regions needs no hero…they need justice. So go, order the continue of the trail, as far as we know this clip could’ve been days ago. We are in no position to act, only Tobin, and until we know more, our regions need the littlest victories much more than a act of war” Leo speaks to me before rising “We will mourn the loss of our greatest Scout of Kanatos in a timely matter, until then, our priority continues to be the trail” 

“You’re going to let them get away with that” A kanatos world leader is quick off his feet with hatred. 

“The trail will continue, I want all media stopping any possible leakage of the footage… but until further notice, this trial is our priority. We must pick and choose our battles wisely as we are in no position to sacrifice what we have going. The trial commences immediately” I order with a glance to Leo whom nods with assurance. 

* * *

 

As I finally reach the building Sasic leaked to me, I take a second to breath. It is now sunset and I have no more energy to go on. Tears have forced their way upon my cheeks, burning them, burning me, burning the human within.  Leaning my head against the side of the building, I let myself fall. I feel the exhaustion, the pain, I feel the bullet in Sasic’s heart and the pounding at the back of my neck. 

“You mourn, why” I hear Zane’s voice at the end of the street. _I should’ve known,_ I think as I mentally slap myself. _Of course they would find me, they always win._

“Why do you care” I spit, unsurprised that theres blood in it. 

“I don’t…but I wondered what would break first…your spirit or your body” Zane replies without any emotion. As if he really did wonder that. 

“So…what’s next, you’re here, you found me, I’m exhausted…I can’t out run you, so what’s next Zane, because this small talk isn’t winning anything for anyone” I curse at him as I turn to meet his eyes. 

“Do I look like the guy with the plan” He asks, tilling his head to the side. I stare at him long, wanting so bad to say no but knowing better than to say yes “Come, its time” He finishes as he turns to walk away. I know that following him will lead to one ending but to try and run would be suicide. So I stand and walk behind him, knowing in my heart that I’ll be dead by sunset next day. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry if I have upset anyone with the way it's playing out. Every death is significant in this story, they all shape and teach Tobin.


	15. Savior

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally. The end. At least, for now. It has been long, it has been hard but we have made it. PLEASE read the chapter notes at the beginning and end. Thank you. 
> 
> Also, very long. Emotional. Deaths and violence but finally, closure. 
> 
> POV's change without warning like last chapter. I think you guys have it down :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where to begin, I've been writing this since ever now. And it took almost a month and a half to finally make peace with the ending. I wanted to end it in so many ways. I would write an ending and delete it, start over again and again. I had written an ending and allowed it to sit for two weeks because it didn't feel right. Finally wrote this ending and allowed it to simmer. It took a lot but I find that this is the ending I want for all characters. I couldn't mention them all but I will soon. 
> 
> Super long but I thank you all for continuing your support and love all throughout it. I will be writing three chapters called: 1 Hour, 1 Month, 1 Year. I can assume you all know what that'll be about. Anyhow, ENJOY. PLEASE COMMENT AS I WANT ALL REACTIONS AND I PROMISE TO ANSWER ALL LINGERING QUESTIONS (About anything). :)

Savior 

 

Everyones confused but nevertheless ready to continue as the world leaders come in. I glance to the side to see Servando besides Alex. While its weird, it seems fitting. I feel Tim’s eyes on me and glance at him. They scream of curiosity and alert. Something must’ve happened, something with Tobin, and now this trial has become 10 times more important than before.

“Ms. Sauerbrunn” The judge asks as I rise from my seat, “Are you ready to continue” He asks.

“Theres only one way sir, forward” I reply, glancing at Alex.

* * *

 

As we leave the court, I feel anticipation, I want it to end. I want my father judged for his crimes. I want the verdict, I want this all to end.

“Alex, wait” Allie calls for me as I rush to the car.

“I can’t Allie”

“Please, just one second”

“I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE, NOT A SECOND MORE” I scream at Allie as I stop at the car and break down.

“Al, I…” Allie doesn’t finish her sentence as she wraps her arms around me. It is dark now, and I feel as broken as the clouds in the sky, “I can’t go on anymore Allie” I cry into her chest as she holds me tighter.

“None of us can, but this is the life we have, and we only have one. And while your bones crack, as your heart grows heavy and you mind finds no peace, remember that there is more to your pain than just ache” She replies as she rubs my back. We stay tied together for minutes as I calm down, feeling just a tad bit better.

“Come on, you can stay the night with Alice and I” Allie pulls me with her. My guards follow closely behind but allow me the distance I need.

* * *

At the sight of Alice, I fall to pieces again. Being as gentle and understanding as always, Allie enters the house to remove Alice from the sight of the window. _It pains me_. While Alice is a resonating resemblence of Amanda, she’s also everything that Jeri and Tobin are. _She’s everything I don’t have right now, or may never have again_.

“Would you like us to take you back to the hotel, Miss” My guards ask. I sniff silent and shake my head no. They give me sometime to settle before escorting me inside. As I enter, I’m hit the warmth of home and find pain in my bones once again.

“Here, this will help” Jose comes up to me with some warm coffee.

“Thank you” I quietly thank as I take the cup from him. He nods and quickly disappears, not wanting to trigger anything.

“Jose’s going to put her to bed, come…you need rest too” Allie guides me through the house. We come across a good and she nods for me to go rest. I hesitate to go in, finding myself needing to say something, get it off my chest. For Allie and I are on no good terms, yet here we are. _She’s taking care of me, as always._

“I know what you’re thinking, so save it…the nights only getting darker” She offers a small smile before leaving me. I don’t stop her, knowing that she must be feeling so much too. I whisper good night before proceeding to dream of a day I’ll lay eyes on the eyes of my love and sister.

* * *

 

“You’ve…been at this…for two hours…give up” I barely talk as I dangle on the wall of a room Zane has left me in . Before I receive an answer, I receive a strike to my face and one to my stomach. I take it like the Scout I am, without a sign of pain or deterioration.

“Don’t tell me what to do you cunt” The man grabs my face before proceeding in rage. Mid attack, the door swings open and Zane, along men in white coats, enter the room. I zone out, feeling a bad burning sensation in my neck. The sound of fists meeting mandibles is hard to miss as well as Zane’s hands on my cuffs.

“I apologize for their savage behavior…their feeble minds are too weak to follow simple orders” He apologizes with sincerity clear in his voice. My eyes are too swollen to find his glaze, I lean into him. Knowing very well the position I’m in, the wreck I am, the things I’m feeling and the parts I can no longer feel. I allow him to carry me away, not resisting the fourth coming.

* * *

 

I sit besides Servando once again the following morning and Allie sits towards my left, two rows in front.We’re about fours hours in, and it’s going to strike noon soon.I sit up straight, my eyes and ears focused. We all know we’re approaching the end. The judge hinting that a verdict will most likely be read tonight or tomorrow morning.

“Becky” My father’s lawyer begins the next question.

“ESL Sauerbrunn” She corrects annoyed. It’s about the fifth time she’s had to correct him and it’s putting her on edge.

“You no longer serve”

“That doesn’t matter” She snaps at him.

“Well, being that you no longer”

“Call her ESL Sauerbrunn or Agent Becky and no more or I’ll have you removed” The judge having had enough of my fathers jerk-ness, threatens him. My fathers lawyer rolls his eyes and lets out a heavy sigh as theres gasps around the room and murmuring. The judge looks at his bailiff whom tries to simmer the commotion that has began.

“What is going on” I ask Servando as he looks around confused.

“I have no idea” He replies as he glances at Tim. We watch as Kanatos president along with Tim and squad members begin to leave the room in a hurry. Carli is receiving word as is the Judge by agents. Before I can open my mouth, my guards are pulling Servando away and hushing me in the opposite direction. I try to fight and ask what is happening but am only met with the eyes of Allie across the room before a door shuts and I stare at the back of it. _What has my father done?_

* * *

 

“You haven’t asked about your friends, why” Zane asks as he monitors over doctors attaching things to me.

“When I took on the role as a Scout, I signed on the realities it came with…that being the lies, the cover ups and the fake hope that Citadel fed the people…As far as I know, they are long gone” I reply snapping my head away from an agent who clearly misses my diamond, “Fucking hell, do your job right” I curse at the man.

Zane raises his hand and the doctor is quickly removed from the room, begging for forgiveness as he is carried out. I raise an eyebrow at Zane who zooms his eyes onto me. I look into the empty orbs to see him contemplating. Whether to answer, reply or explain…or possibly something else. The moment ends as soon as it begins as he tenses his muscles momentarily and looks away as if in pain. _That…isn’t normal._

Before I can ask, a doctor connects something to my diamond and I cry out in pain.

“STOP” I hear Zane yell at the doctor sticking a needle into my diamond, straight into my nervous system.

“But we must” The doctor looks at Zane as if he were crazy.

“And you saw what happened last time that happened!” Zane yells at the man bewildered.

“THE ORDERS WERE” Zane’s fists cut off the doctors outburst. Within second, Zane begins to pound the man with rage. I watch in a trance of disbelief and horror as blood begins to cover his crisp uniform. Soon enough, everyone stops moving, including the man’s lungs as Zane freezes, tensing, with the man’s throat in between his purple fists. I glance around the room, soaking in the horrid eyes, the lividness of them, as they, the doctors remaining, beg for my help. As Zane comes back from his trance, agents rush to his side to clean him off and remove the body of the man that once was. I know better than to speak but can’t allow this to go on.

“What is it that you want, Zan-” I open my mouth as he begins to walk past me.

“DON’TCALL ME THAT” He breathes fire, holding a random needle to my throat. I don’t react, simply holding still as his eyes, now even darker than before, scan my own eyes for something I fear he will find.

“Okay, Z, can I call you that” I ask as I search his eyes. He takes a moment before removing the needle and throwing it onto a medical tray besides me. I make contact with a doctor across of me and seize to find the hope of life. _It’s gone, they have accepted their deaths._ I signal my eyes to the tray Zane has tossed the needle on and look back at the doctor in front of me. He doesn’t move, but signals back that he understands.

“You…may” Zane answers as he stands before me once again.

“So, Z…” I pause, watching him, awaiting to see if everything is still okay, “Why is it that you want?”

“You ask me what I want, but in dear truth, it is I that wonders what you want” The vicious monster that just took the life of an innocent so quickly vanishes as his orbs start to unveil. The man I once knew, the man I so much trusted and cared for begins to return. And as traumatizing as it is knowing that he is long gone, its hard not to want to reach out to hug him.

“I…I just” I pause to think long and hard as the doctor I signaled makes his way to the tray. Zane, unaware, remains where he is as the doctor fakes a medical take. “I simply want for the world to be a safe place” I finally breathe as the doctor slips the needle into my hand.

“You have so much faith…in them, why? For all they have done is sinned, they have only ever destroyed what you have given them” Zane challenges.

“But who are we to decide what they do with what we have given them Z” I ask as I move forward in my seat, allowing the needle to get behind my hand and lock into the cuffs link “We have made our choices, and as much as it pains, humans make their own, knowing or in some cases, neglecting the consequences they must face for them…it is not in our command to take power” I finish up as I feel the cuff around my right hand begin to loosen up. _I’m almost free._

“So you do this, willingly, knowing that your sacrifices might not yield you victory” Zane, completely unaware of his surrounds but I, misses the doctors backing away.

“This is a road that so often takes me places I don’t want to go to, a life that I doubt I’ll see to the end but still, a path I choose to travel down nonetheless…You have to understand Z, we must do what must be done no matter the sacrifice” My voice breaks in the end, and Zane, now aware of my plans, attacks me. We fumble off the table as the doctors begin to fight against the agents that rush in.

He’s strong, stronger than I can manage and in power. He’s yelling orders at agents and I know if I don’t take control now, if I don’t fight, no one will be capable of ever. Reaching for the gun in Zane’s harness, he pushes me off. My back hits the brick wall hard and I groan as I land on the ground. Zane runs at me and I move, tripping him and making him land into the wall. I crawl across the floor and feel the burning in my arm. Pulling out the wire links into my arm, I scream. Zane looks at me with pleasure, as if happy.

“You’re going to wish you hadn’t done that” He chuckles as he takes his time walking over to me. I begin to stand but feel myself growing weak, beyond tired. Theres a gun shot and I turn to see the doctors lined up. _What have they done? What have I done?_ I ask unable to control my body.

“It’s okay, it’ll all go dark soon” I turn to look at Zane and see him almost at my side. Knowing that I have nothing more to give, I give it one more try.

* * *

 

Theres a knock at the door and I look up to see Carli. My eyes search hers and I see more bad news.

“Theres…theres been an incident and we think it would be best that you no longer stay here…you are not safe” She begins as she places a folder at the table I’m at.

“I’m not leaving”

“It’s not an order of the court but Alex…your life is in danger” She continues as she looks away.

“What are you not telling me”

“It’s…its best you allow Kardia to put you in protective custody until the trial and incident get sorted”

“Is she okay” My heart begins to pound as she hints at the incident again.

“Again, Alex, I think”

“I HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW” I yell at Carli as I stand up, pushing the papers off that table. Carli flenches ever so slightly, but enough for me to see. The tears well up and I begin to cry. Carli stays still, unmoved and unresponsive until the door opens.

“Allow me to” Servando voices rings, I look up to his ever so soft eyes that give me more sympathy that I’m aware that I need. Carli nods and leaves the room, allowing Servando to convince me.

“Please…tell me she’s alive” I cry, unsure if my heart means Tobin or Jeri. Servando quickly wraps his arms around me as I cry into him.

“We’re not sure, on either of them” Servando whispers, as if his full voice would crush me even more.

“What do you mean” I ask as I pull away.

“Come, sit” He orders as he pulls a chair for me. I take a seat and he walks over to the other side, “Theres…been some sort of footage leak, more like intentional, nevertheless… it has come to the surface that…” Servando takes a moment to breath, unable to speak without emotions. At this, my nerves begin to increase and I know what he is about to say is something he struggled to see himself, “Tobin went MIA, locking her own squadron and taking off alone… she’s, alive, or might be, no one knows how long ago the footage is from but she…” Servando’s voice cracks and he looks up at the ceiling. The tears from from my eyes as I watch him pain, finding myself loving him almost like I had before in the moment. He clears his throat and returns to meet my gaze, “Sasic is dead, she was used as bait to get Tobin under control and…and they killed her cold blooded as Tobin was trying to save her. There was nothing she could do, I’m sorry Alex” Servando lets some tears fall and I allow myself to fully break down, “With Sasic being killed, the tension is rising and theres some chaos in Kanatos. The leaders are doing their best to contain the peace we have just made by the unity of our regions but Sasic was their prized Scout. She was killed just inches away from Tobin…She was in that position out of choice but some people place blame on Tobin and our region… Hearts are heavy, rationality is blocked”

“And the world leaders fear someone will hurt me or my father out of the pain of Sasic’s death” I interrupt him. He nods his head slowly, as if withholding information.

“The world leaders say they have part of the footage, more than what we were shown on TV. Carli is pressing for an agreement to release whatever they have to cease, or as she explained, simmer the boiling water until more can be done”

“What is the catch” I ask as I hear it in his voice, at the tip of his tongue. Thinking nothing could be worse at the moment.

“Tobin is seen walking along Zane, willingly” _I was wrong._

* * *

 

I hold the needle to Zane’s neck, and watch as everyone stops moving.

“Carful, you might hurt yourself” Zane gulps at me as he lifts his hands were I can see them.

“What did you do” I ask as I begin to cough, feeling my throat begin to bleed from the dryness.

“You should be thanking him, we have liberated you” Zane laughs. I press the needle to his skin and he stops.

“Him? Who is he? Who are you talking about” My head whips to look at the agents as he clicks his gun.

“They’ll kill you, they have no remorse”

“And you think I do” I hiss with anger as I begin to feel light headed.

“I think you glorify your cause, attacking others, pinning yourself against evil to avoid the truths about yourself” Zane breathes quietly staring deep into my eyes. I waste no time pressing the needle into Zane and taking him to the ground. I pound every emotion into his still body, fighting the truth of his statement, willing myself to ignore the fact that he has uncovered a patch I have so badly wanted to forget. Zane begins to fight back but I manage to get him off of me. I charge towards the agents and liberate myself from the chains inside. Blood drains my skin as I finish off the agents and spill onto the ground as Zane takes me down. We go at it, full force, with nothing or no one to stop us. With his strength and my weakening, he manages to pin me down, burying a sharp piece of glass into the wound on my hip and soon enough, he’s gripping my neck. A part of me, deep insides, wants him to do it. To finish me off, but the rational side of me wills me to attack. Slowly, I inch my left hand to grab the stool besides us. As my hand makes contact with the leg of it, I swing it at Zane’s head with all the robotic force of my arm. His body flies a yard to my right, knocking him temporarily unconscious.

Taking advantage of his stage, I begin to pull the glass out of my hip only to hear Zane beginning to grow concious.

Knowing theres no more shots, I act without thought, allowing my instincts to just do, burying the glass I pulled out of myself deep into his sternum, regretting nothing until my voice leaves his lips. My body freezes as I look up to meet his clear, innocent, confused orbs. The ones I know, the ones I trust, the orbs that belong to the real him.

“ _Tobin?_ ” He asks with tears welling up. His voice broken, scared and betrayed as he glances down to see my hand on the glass that pierces into him. He looks back up to me, tears now spilling from his eyes as he begins to stumble backwards. I cry out his name as I do the best I can to prevent his body from slamming into the ground.

“ZANE! ZANE!” I cry as his eyes stare at the ceiling in horror. _WHAT HAVE I DONE?!_

“ _Tob_ ” He tries but is unable to muster any words as the glass prevents his lungs from expanding.

“I’m so sorry Zane! I’m so sorry, I…” I cry as I try to fix what I have done. As soon as my hand touches the glass, he screams in agony, death reeking in his voice. He moves his lips to talk but I stop him.

“Dont! Dont! I’m going to get you help, I’m going to fix this!” I begin clawing at my cheeks as I begin to move away. As I’m about to stand, Zane’s arm grabs mine, making me turn around.

“Why” Is all he manages to get out as the color in his eyes vanishes, the grip on my arm loosening, the beat of his heart stopping. My knees meet the ground on his last breathe, as does my heart. To end the life of an enemy is one, but to end the life of a friend whom knew not what he had done is to be a monster.

I stay on my knees for minutes, crying out the pain I feel, allowing myself to bleed out. I realize my mistake, knowing well I could’ve saved Zane had I taken a second to look at him before acting. _He died thinking I murdered him._

“I am not worthy of your forgiveness” I cry “…For I have failed your father, your region and your sacrifices. I will carry your death on my shoulders, shackling my decision to my ankles, dragging the weight of my instincts with my every step, burdening myself to mistake I have made” I cry as grab a white cloth to cover his body. “Have I noticed that you” I stop to catch myself for breaking even more. Covering his body, I take the blood that bleeds from my wound and paint Athena’s symbol onto the cloth. Making sure to write, _Brother,_ on the blanket as well.

“Zane, may the light of your selfless acts to protect Kardia, the people including myself and those, guide you to Heaven” Pushing the sleeve up his left hand, I find his special agent bracelet still on and close my eyes, bracing myself to remove it. Putting it away in my pocket, I stand, feeling more weight on my shoulders than before, except this time, I have no plan on how to rid myself of it.

* * *

 

The court is dead silent as I walk in with Servando and my guards. Everyones eyes feel like darts to a target on my back, as if I was the suddenly the prey in the room. Walking to my row, I find Rimando in the row in front and Tim suddenly now behind my seat. He meets Servando’s gaze and gives him a firm nod as I sit. Glancing to Servando, he shrugs off my glance. _The world leaders must’ve made an agreement with Servando prior to his meeting with me knowing that I wouldn’t leave…_

“All rise” The women asks of everyone as the Judge and World Leaders enter.

“The trial of Michael Morgan and the Region of Kardia will continue without interruptions. Anyone who dares to approach, attack, harm, abuse or even speak a word in the direction of the defendant will be arrested and charged against by the Region of Kardia for the interruption of Justice being served today. Am I clear” The judge, more gathered and strong than before asks the court. Receiving head nods, we are asked to be seated.Becky is brought in and unlike ever before, her eyes search mine for answers. Begging to know what is happening, begging to understand what is going on.And for once since the trial has started, I don’t feel alone.

* * *

 

“Get up, come on, come on Tobin, please get up” I hear begging as I finally start to wake. Looking around I see very dimmed lights and someone I hadn’t thought of seeing in a while.

“Mittag” I choke out confused.

“She survived” I hear someone else say. Trying to turn my head, I feel hands holding my head still “Hey, hey…don’t do that” Nadine’s voice clears out. I blink a couple of more times and finally, after a minute or two, am able to see. I want to speak, but find myself extending my arms to hug both Mittag and Nadine.

“I can honestly say this is the first time I’m happy to find you on the battle field” Nadine breaks the silence causing Mittag and I to chuckle.

“Me too, me too” I breathe as we let go. Taking a look around, I see that Mittag and Nadine are in uniforms that belong to the Zane’s men meaning that they’ve been hiding for who knows how long.

“Think our regions will be proud of us” Mittag asks as she turns on a mini walkie talkie she has collected.

“Very” I joke as strentch my muscles but feel pain everyone.

“Careful” Nadine quickly come to my side, grabbing a bottle of mediation “Here, this’ll help” She half smiles at me before pushing a needle into my diamond. I choke back a sob as everything from the tip of the needle to the pressure of the medication causes me pain. She removes the needle quickly and allows me time to catch my breath.

“What…what did they do to me” I ask as I breathe heavily. Nadine looks at Mittag as if looking for a way to tell me but unable to. “TELL ME” I half yell, infuriated with the lack of response from my body and surroundings.

“They…they’ve destroyed your diamond” Mittag barely whispers before looking away. I look at Nadine whom too looks away as the tears begin to roll off my face.

“What else” I ask through gritted teeth.

“They’ve infected your body with some sort of supplement…I don’t, I…I only watched them do it to Sasic but I have…she’s dead isn’t she” Mittag asks as she focuses her eyes on the door of the small closet we’re hidden in.I want to answer but find no way to express such tragedy. Nadine nods her head in acceptance, reaching out a hand to Mittags shoulder and giving her a squeeze of strength.

“How long ago was Sasic infected” I ask as I wipe my tears.

“About 15 hours ago” Nadine answers. _FIFTEEN HOURS AGO… that means…_

“What is it” Mittag asks with red eyes. I shake my head no in idiocy. Feeling less power and more weakness. _What did I do…to deserve this._

“They played me” I sniffle, standing up from the chair I’m in and laughing ironically at myself “They used Sasic as bait…they wanted me to think I could save her…Sasic…Sasic tried to warn me but it was too late. I wouldn’t have been able to save her even if I had in that moment, she was already dying inside” I explain as I begin to grab armor the girls have gathered.

“What do you think you’re doing” Nadine quickly stands to block me.

“You don’t get it, they aren’t trying to hurt Kardia or Kanatos. They’re trying to hurt me. HE is trying to hurt me. And he won’t stop until he sees me break” I push Nadine aside, grabbing a vest and a gun.

“Who is he? Zane is dead”

“Zane was just a proxy, another doll in his playhouse…Zane died thinking I killed him, thinking that…that someone as close as family wanted to hurt him”

“And how are you going to find him Tobin? You’re dying! We need to be finding you a solution…not an ending” Mittag stands at the door, blocking my way.

“What I need is for you to tighten up those straps on your vest and get the fuck out of here before I raise hell to the surface. I need you to go fucking find Ali and Jeri and get them safe. I NEED TO END THIS. AM ICLEAR” I ask Mittag as I grab the door handle.

“Yes scout” She replies immediately.

“Good, find any survivors and convince any whom you come across to surrender, for my mercy is buried with those that I love”

* * *

 

The court continues, heavy hearted and tense.Within two hours, the Judge has removed individuals for disruption of silence and lack of respects for Becky as she give her testimony and is cross examined.The Judge, exhausted, has an agent approach him.Ordering the court to a pause, everyone rushes to grab there phones.As I begin to pull mine out, Tim’s hand stops me.

“Don’t feed into their game Alex…not all venom strikes our bodies” He explains as he offers his hand. I take it and allow him to lead me away to the room I’m jailed to. It takes about 10 minutes for Servando to come in. This time, unlike last time, he looks so lost. So, unsure, and I begin to understand what Tim wanted me to avoid. _He wants me to stay clear of all judgement, to not poison my mind with what I see, and stay true to what I know._

“You don’t have to say it” I talk before Servando does. His eyes leave the ground and meet mine in a pain I have only seen once. My heart yearns to know what he does and I don’t, but my gut tells me that knowing might wound me much more than I’m already hurting. He doesn’t question my decision, instead shaking his head okay as he leaves. I spend the rest of the 20 minutes to myself, focusing on my breathing. Trying my best to stay calm, knowing what I’m going to face next might just be the end of this war within me.

“Alex” Tim’s voice brings me out of my thoughts. He reads my confusion, nodding his head no. _Servando has left._ While it would be responsible to grow upset, I only feel saddened that I am no longer enough to cure his pain.It feels bitter in a way, that I have officially lost someone I once loved, but sweet to know that he has found a remedy in someone else.Grabbing Tim’s elbow, we begin to walk back to the court.

“Some pains must be cured alone” Tim offers as we reach the doors.

“I’m not upset if thats what you think of my silence. I am only saddened to realize that I am no longer enough”

“But thats were you are wrong, he didn’t leave. He’s in the back, but he knows you very well. Better than I imagined if I may say…it is you who can’t be cured by him Alex. You may not be his prized procession but he knows deep in his heart that his presence makes this all much harder for you” Tim opens the door and we walk in silence. As I take a seat, Tim offers my hand a squeeze before moving around to sit behind me alongside Armando as I am know seated at the very front, where all eyes can see me. _Somethings not right._

* * *

 

I’ve been going up the tower for almost two hours, searching room for room, hallways and staircases, eliminating those I come across and finding survivors. But without any luck, I have not found the mastermind nor the ones I love.

As I jog past some research rooms I presume were for testing, I stop to take a peak. Opening a random door, I do a take on the chemicals and machines.Everything seems like too much, I am no scientist but the labels scream of hazard. 

“Plutonium” I read out loud as I find a sealed door.That…is not good. I think as I continue to search the room, feeling a sharp pain in my neck, I stop to hold onto the edge.The room seems to spin and I feel a flashback coming. Gritting my teeth, I fight it, hearing voices in my head, things I don’t remember.I cry out in pain as it fights me back. _Just let go,_ I hear Emmets voice.

The sound of a door slamming open down the hall snaps me out of it. I’m on my toes immediately, running to the door to lock it.Bullets begin to fly through the air, locking me in the room, without an escape except the window. As theres running down the hall along with yelling of men in codes I know nothing of, I make the choice to go out the window.

As I begin to open the window, theres shooting and the sound of doors being slammed opened. Taking a look around the room and finding nothing to make my climb upward easier, I set off.Gripping to the edges of the window, I allow my weight to dangle. I feel a strain along my spine and a pain in all my body. **_Death_** _._ My inner demon realizes. I am dying. There is no more denying that I am. And getting to the top might be my last opportunity of meeting the ones whom have set out to make my life hell.

Tightening up the belt on my waist, I rise to the occasion. Pulling the weight I carry forward, hearing the blasting of the lab door and bullets shattering the window below me.It should phase me, the danger I’m in, the odds of survival, the odds of ever seeing all that I love but in truth, it doesn’t. If anything, it fuels my desire to reach the top. It’s almost if I _was_ made for this.

The sound of bullets, yelling, glass shattering begins to fade out as the pounding of my heart grows loud. My body is steadily weakening, I can feel it as I grip the edge above me, pulling myself up, gritting my teeth, feeling the burn in my arms, including my robotic one. But I continue. Pieces of glass cut my bare skin, forcing hisses out of my throat.But the only thought in my head is, why.

As I finally reach the roof, I let out a yell of dignity as my body lays spawned on the luxurious roof top. Beginning to stand, the roof doors open and I glance at the small army sent to take me down.

“Do you guys ever give up” I heave as I stand. The men, all a little impressed by my still standing figure toss a gun my way, earning a shake of my head, “If I shall die, it won’t be with a gun in my hand…I have never been a fan of them…they show very little respect to live” I respond, killing it over the edge of the roof.

“And what about these” A man asks, toss a bag to my feet. Glancing down at it and right back at him, he nods for me to reach in. Taking the bag, I reach in and touch the handles I’ve branded myself to. Pulling out my knifes, I inspect them. _Untouched…why._ “Will you fight with those” The man asks. I take a second to soak in the beauty of a blade before letting it glide through the air, striking the man besides the leader in the throat. We watch, as he falls to his knees, gripping the knife as he bleeds.

I wish it were shock in their eyes as they look at me, but it's not. They begin to fire at me as I jump around the roof, scattering the men, giving myself space to play.

Hundreds of bullet casings, four grenades and eight men later, I am cornered. I glance at the reflection of the suns horizon on the floors of the dark marble roof and acknowledge that soon, the sun will set, as will my heart.

Pulling myself up from spot I am hiding from, I search for the remaining four guys and see them quickly approaching. Glancing over the rooftop, I know I have no choice. Twirling my knife in my hand, I step in the open and go straight for the men. We wrestle, I take the biggest guy down and beat all that I have inside but it’s no use. My body can no longer fight, my bones are craving and my faith is long gone. Two men grab ahold of my arms, a third punches me in the stomach and the leader walks up to my face.

“I have to admit, I didn’t think you’d last this long” He speaks impressed as he stands before me. I take in his structure but see nothing but agent in him.

“You aren’t in charge” I state more than question. He smiles at me rather than answering, pacing just a few feet, as if stalling. Before I can ask what he is waiting for, the elevator door pings and the doors begin to slide open. My head snaps, my heart stops, and the tears well, as I catch sight of a man I thought dead.

“Hello Tobin”

* * *

 

The judge dismisses us for a last time, as the jury, along with the world leaders debate on the ruling of the court. I rise and follow Tim out.

“Can we, just…stay out here” I ask as we exit into a secured hall with a view of the outside world. Tim looks at my guards whom nod their heads yes. Before proceeding to give me space, I stop him.

“Are you sure” He questions.

“Must be nice to read someones emotions” I comment as he stands besides me.

“It’s not” He replies, pausing momentarily to gather his words, “It is useful in certain times but it’s actually haunting when you begin to feel the fear within their voice in your bones and realize that you can’t save them”

“I-I’m sorry” I apologize, unable to shake off the cold shiver.

“It is not your bad doing”

“You must find some comfort in my fathers trial” I comment, slightly defensive.

“He has not yet been tried” Tim responds casually, with the most sincerity I have heard.

“He will be convicted of treason of his own region, of aiding a terrorist group, putting the Commander, his own daughter in the hands of others and evidently responsible for the death of hundreds and sentenced to death row in the months to come… That, is the legacy the Morgan name will be. That is my father.” I breathe through tears, embracing myself slightly tighter as my body slightly shakes.

“Trials come in all shapes and sizes. How we respond to these trials indicate how we live our lives and what kind of people we are to become. So don’t reckon yourself to a name, but instead to your actions in reaction to the outcomes that we are to face. He is one man, and together” Tim pauses to wrap an arm around me, “we are a force against the downfall”.

Noise down the hall quickly sets Tim as he runs off in the direction while my guards escort me to my safe room where I remain for two hours. The door opens, and in comes Tim.

“It is time” He informs me. I stand from the chair and fix my dress. Walking over to door, I soak in the sounds of my heels clicking against the marble floor. The walk is short, silent and daunting. We are the last to walk into the court room. Again, I am escorted to the front, where I am seated between my guards with Tim and Rimando behind me. Allie now too sits in the front, but on the row adjacent to my left.

I clutch my wallet tight in my hand as we wait for the World leaders, Judge and jury to enter. Upon waiting, the room falls silent and only the sound of the cameras at the back can be heard humming. When the heavy metal door opens, everyone rises. I try to keep my eyes on the Judge, not daring to look at my father as he is brought in. _1…2…3…breathe…1…2…3…breathe…_ I begin to focus on my breathing, trying to stop my nerves and emotions from coming forward. As the Judge reaches his seat, he commands us to sit.

“It…has been a journey. One that, I regret we ever had to experience. But, given our history, our foundations and ancestors, a lesson to us all. Today, we have gathered to hear the verdict on all counts of first degree treason to the region of Kardia, first degree counts on aiding and assisting of terrorist acts and groups as well as counts of second degree murder for those that we have lost on our path leading up to today. The defendant, Michael Morgan, pleaded not guilty to every and all charges pressed by the World Leaders of the New World.The attorney of Kardia, during the break, has pressed for first death row advancement of earliest convince if found guilty by the Court here today. Upon discussion with the World Leaders, I have declined the press and shall keep the consequences at death row in the up coming months” The Judge pauses for the room, including my father, to react. I swallow the knot in my throat as the Judge order all parties to rise, calling the lead of the Jury to the stand and asking for utter silence.

I begin to listen to my heart as the man in a suit stands in front of the room. Playing with the edge of the paper in his hands, scared too of what is to come down in history.

“We, the people of Kardia and Kanatoes have come to the verdict. Upon discussion and lengthy trial, the Jury has found Michael Morgan,” The man, takes a deep breath, making me hold mine, before exhaling and continuing “guilty on all charges presented here by the court on treason against the Region of Kardia. The Jury also found Michael Morgan guilty on all charges presented by the Region of Kardia in assisting a terrorist group and aiding in terrorist acts. And lastly, the Jury has found Michael Morgan…guilty of second degree murder on all counts presented in the court. Michael Morgan is sentenced to death row here today, without the opportunity of bail, parole, or second trial” The man finishes. Walking off the podium and to his seat. No one moves, no one even breaths. My heart beats hard against my lungs as I grit my teeth in heartbreak.

Without warning, the sound of a life ending bullet rips through the air. I feel life leave my body. Just one moment ago, my heart was beating and now, it’s not.

* * *

 

My heart bleeds with every step he takes in my direction. I want to speak, but the knot in my throat forbids me. The pain so great inside forces the tears out. Extending his hand out to my cheek, he wipes them off as if he cares.

“WHY” I scream with a voice I have only heard in my head as his hand touches my skin. It burns, the fire scarring my soul.

“I will explain in time, Tobin, you must not resist. You are dying” He nods for a man to bring a case in our direction and I shake my head no. 

“I am already dead because of you, hundreds are dead, BECAUSE OF YOU” I scream as I shove both men but their grip is too strong.

“No Tobin…I simply introduced a little anarchy and they turned it into chaos…I was lucky that Sepp was a nutjob but Michael” He takes a moment to ponder Michael, as if in gentleness as he opens the case brought to him by his agent, “…his precious gems were all that I needed to steal for him to do whatever I asked of him. Did you really think the man _was_ evil” He turns to me as he prepares a bottle.

“Was?” I ask as I look at his hands that stop moving. He sets the little medical bottle down and turns to meet my eyes.

“You know the thing about chaos that I like…that it is fair. But of course, all deaths are not my doing. I simply put information out, it is was them…they fed their demons. They are the one’s condemning their own humanity, my dear… I have never put a gun to a man’s head, unlike some” He subtly wounds me before continuing his work.

It hurts to hear him reproach me of my actions. Acts he never once tried to stop. _A man whom has others do his dirty work…not a stain on his white glove…smart._

“I thought this is what you wanted Tobin, I thought…that this” He extends his arms in the air as if accomplished “This is what you wanted Tobin, is it not” He asks confused by my silence as he turns to meet my eyes with dejection.

“No…no” The mixture of sickness, sadness and disbelief begin to fall from my eyes and he rushes over, leaving whatever was in the case behind. He kneels before me in panic as my heart races.

“But that makes no sense Tobin, you wanted to rid of the forces, of all the governance in the world, you wanted power to the people. You _wanted_ to save them Tobin. Did you not? Is that not anarchy?” He asks in a hurry. His eyes, so sincere, so true to his intentions, search mine for an answer I cannot give him. An answer that no longer seems worth my doings.

“It didn’t…it didn’t have to be this way” I begin to cry in pain of my actions as I begin to realize that his philosophy was truly no different that mine, only his approach was.

“What were you supposed to do Tobin? Tell them to start over? To elect you leader? To form a union made of squad agents, high empires, to unite with other regions? That would’ve never worked. Not with minds such as theirs. This entire time you’ve thought yourself to be against an enemy, feed by their own venoms never realizing that we are all free to follow our own path. It was never about freeing you of someones hold, for we are all merely toys for those who created us…I simply wanted to free you from your own grip” He says as he looks up at me, “Until the lion gets a voice of its own, history will always glorify the hunter”

“I never wanted to hurt anyone” I cry as self hatred begins to feel. The weight of all that has happened falling upon me. _Me, I was the hunter, but also the lion._

“Right and wrong don’t come in black and white, but in shades of gray Tobin.It is not your fault, but theirs and our ancestors, you parents included” He speaks before rising and returning to the agent holding the case open for him.

“And what do you know of my parents” I ask, raising my head.

“That is for another day, you’ve been under dose too long. We must treat you immediately before you pass” He nods for the men to pull me forward but I resist.

“My life matters no more, I have done your work, achieved my own goal in all this despair so what good do I bring anyone anymore?! The ones I loved buried six feet deep and for what!? What more do I have to give!” I ask as I stand my ground.

“We must rebuild this world and ensure no further damage can be done! Don’t you understand!” He yells at me enraged, “We cannot let them continue their ways! We must show them, path their paths so that this never happens again, we did not force an evolution to go back to nothing” He explains, once again ordering his men to bring me forward as he begins to pack the case. As the men push me forward, I push back.

“No.” I breathe out as I stare at the ground.

“No?” He asks as everyone haults.

“This can’t go on anymore” I say through tears as I look up at him, “We are just like them, all this time I believed to be better than them. I believed myself to stand for a greater good but god… I was wrong. This whole time, I wanted to fix what their mistakes but life has its own doing and I, much like you or anyone has no right to judge. We have no right. To establish a path would be to do as they did! Do you not understand, I will not continue to shackle them to my beliefs. I have done so and look what I have done” I bite my lip and exhale slowly. The suns beautiful colors begin to decorate the floor and I know that I am finally right. I push the men off me and run at him. I’m taken down by his men and a fight ensures as he stands by to watch.

The men, like the rats they are, shank me with electrical pulses as I beat one of their own. Fighting through the agony of the electricity pulsing through my burning flesh, I take one of my knifes and burry it deep into a man’s throat before ripping the tazors from two remaining men. No one wastes time to attack as we stumble to the edge of the roof. With ease, I fling on over the roof before staring at the last one standing between me and the man I once saw as family.

“Stand down Tobin, the harder you fight, the harder you fall” He speaks from the stair case.

“If I go down, you go down with me” I reply to him as I prepare my next move.

“But Tobin…you cannot defeat the demons you enjoy playing with”

As his words sink it, I sink a blade into the last man, screaming with rage as his eyes water, staring into mine. I slowly begin to pull the blade out of the man as he coughs in pain. He tries to speak but I hear none of it as my reality surrounds me. “I once caught the bodies of my enemies before they hit the ground, but I will not anymore” I say before letting go of his vest, watching him fall off the edge of the roof and into the sunset. I hear him walk to me as I watch the man fall to his last breath.

“Im proud of you” he says as I stare into the sky below. I look down at my hands and no longer recognize myself, “You have surpassed all my hopes for you, I” Before he can proceed, his neck is in between my hands, his eyes staring straight into mine as I hold him above the edge of the roof.

“LOOK AT WHAT WE HAVE DONE” I roar as my hands shake in a torment I have never felt.

“Don’t you understand Tobin, I have liberated you from your own programming. I have set you free from them and all”

“Who is them?! What are you talking about?! ENOUGH WITH THE TAINTED PICTURE” I yell as I let go of his neck and hold his button up shirt.

“You already know Tobin. You have felt it in your heart your entire life…you have searched for answers and meaning never realizing that you are the reason why we are all here”

“You’re not making any sense” I fume as I bring his face closer to mine.

“You and I are real, we know what it takes to make right. But them, they hold no jurisdiction. Take Ali for example… her world is in shambles and is headed straight for the same ending that ours saw. Don’t you see, man kind itself created the plague. Your parents Tobin, they did that. But Lord they would not have it any way but to make you resistant to it. You Tobin, you are the future. That is why you cannot die. It was written for you to evolve and without my doing Tobin…there would be no evolution of you. It was never about changing the world, it was always about changing you. You are the future Tobin. You are, our saving” He speaks with a sincerity I want not to believe. I let go on his shirt as I throw him across the floor. “You are, we are” he pauses to rise from the ground, “The select few that are real, but them, many of them were just crucial to your path”

“They’re real. I have felt their pains, I have felt their flesh and fought for their cause, a cause we all shared. We are no better. We are all the same” I speak as I look at my hands that shake with a venom that pulses through me. How I am still standing, I am not sure, but my breaths are counted and this war has not finished.

“No Tobin…don’t be blind to the oblivion that you defeated. You have been there, you have seen it. You have seen another world but somehow chosen to believe that it is impossible that some people might not be real…including the woman you love” He throws at me as his eyes meet mine, “Is it truly a coincidence that Allie somehow managed in that other world but…but not a select others? What ever happened to the boy she was corned with…would he not have been in the other world too? It’s all too much to take in and all too much to explain. We MUST cure you Tobin, let me help you” He begs with worry as he makes his way to me. I stand still, unsure of what to believe. As I look up to see him right in front of me, I search his eyes for any doubt but as my heart has come to realize, he speaks no lies. He grabs the needle and prepares to inject me but I stop his hand, gripping it with all the strength left in me. The looks in his eyes are of utter confusion, of betrayal and hurt.

“You may not have killed a single man, but you did not stop them. You did not stop me. You let us all believe we were in the right while wronging to prove your hypothesis right. And for that, for that I cannot go. I cannot let your doing and my own ruin the process of their evolution once more. The consequences of my actions may outlive me, but sometimes our sacrifices, no matter how painful, are worth something…even if I never see the outcome” Without a doubt in my mind, I sink my hidden knife into his abdomen, watching his eyes bulge with a sadness that matches my own. He looks down at my hand on the blade and back to me. We stand there for a minute as the rays of the sunset paint us in a light of beautiful irony.

“Look at them Tobin, when you put your trust in them, look at them…you’ll know real from those who are not and maybe someday, you’ll realize that I was only doing what needed to be done” He speaks as he coughs up some blood. His hand rises slight from my shoulder and before I can react, bullets rip through the air sending him and I over the edge. With luck, I latch onto the edge with my left shoulder and he latches onto my leg. I scream in agony as my left shoulder has been damaged by some bullets and my blood levels are low. The poison finally catching up on my debts. We hear gun shots and fight up on the roof but my eyes only stare into the sun.

“Tobin” His voice drowning pulls me away from the light, “Don’t let their choices burden your life as your parents. You are are more powerful that the source of life that you created” He extends his left hand to my right and as I reach to take it, my left hand begins to slip.

“You have- climb up” I breathe through gritted teeth, unable to resist the pain no more. He links his hand into mine and before I can pull him up, he lets go.

“MARK” I scream as his body falls through the air. I quickly grab a grip at the edge and stare back down only to see that he is no longer there. The tears fall freely as I hang there in the horizon of the setting sun until a voice I never thought I would ever hear again calls out for me.

Using all the last life in me, I get over the edge and find the source of the voice. Rushing over, I fall at Jeri’s side and see her covered in a pool of blood.

“Jeri, JERI” I beg as she lays unconscious. Wasting no time, I rush to the case Mark had his men lock and break it open with my sparing knife. I find one last remaining vaccine inside and rush over to Jeri.

“Jeri, Jeri can you hear me” I panic as I struggle to get the vaccine prepared.

“Tobin” She coughs as she stirs, turning her eyes to meet mine. They quickly well up with tears at my sight and mine do the same. She extends her arm in pain to meet mine and I finally take a look at the state she’s in.

“We have to save you” I say as I go back to preparing the vaccine, avoiding her struggle to get my attention. As I go to turn her over, she stops me.

“Jeri you have-”

“I want to hate him, I do Tobin…but he was right. We were headed for another plague and you…” She pauses to caress my face that is covered in blood, “You did what needed to be done and now…now you have to go make sure no one fuck our sacrifices up” Before I can register what she’s doing with her stare hand, she injects the needle into my arm. Her hand falls from my face and she slowly begins to lose conscious. I scream at her in agony as I watch her soul go in and out.

“Please Jeri, stay with me” I cry into her as I carry her body away. _Please._

* * *

 

“Dad” I whisper in pain as he lays in my arms, a bullet in his chest.

“Alex” He whispers as he looks up at me, surprised to see me there.

“Yes Dad” I cry as I look at him with no front or strength. The gentile man I once knew.

“Dont cry” I coughs as he reaches to wipe my tears in pain.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to do that anymore”

“I never did when I should have” He presses as he touches my face. I begin to cry harder as I see the life slipping away, “There are so many things I should have done better… but fear strikes a man harder than his will is able to withstand…just know that I never meant to hurt you. But having you away was what was needed” He begins to cough unsteady. I cry out for help as everyone runs around trying to get everyone out of the room. Tim rushes to my side and suppresses his impression on my fathers wounds as he works to stop the bleed.

“Tim, it is fine” He stops him as he gathers himself. Tim, no accepting his interruption continues but again is halted by my father. “Please, stop” He calmly grabs Tim. Unable to press further, Tim stops and pulls me closer.

“Dad, he has to help you! Let him”

“Alex, my dear… you won’t understand it now but I wasn’t destined to survive. And now I have the chance to make some wrongs right so please stop trying to save a lost cause. I have spent so much wasted time…just let me have these last with you, please” He begs as I look at Tim who steps away in respects to my father.

“Please Father, Please”

“Always so Stubborn, but that is what has made you survive…And Jeri, her genteelness, her wiliness to always” Father stops to cough up blood that slowly drowns him inside, he takes a deep breathe before continuing, “I’m proud of you, just as much as I am your sister. I’m sorry for the pain I have caused you but more importantly for the path I allowed Tobin to follow. She looked in me for a father and I turned to her as a traitor…But you, you and Jeri have mended so many of her wounds. It is hard to feel nothing but proud when I have failed her yet my daughters have risen her. I know that if I have done one thing right, it is having done what I need to protect you, and while I won’t be there to see our sacrifices unfold, Tobin will be there in my place. And that is the reward of all my doings. I love you Alex, I never loved you less”

“I love you too dad” I cry as his eyes close. Medics begin to surround me and I am ripped away from his side. I hold onto Tim with dear life as he holds me with a strength that feels my pain.

The door of the court slam open, tearing my closed eyes open. I pry my eyes into those of Allie, and I know in my heart that the war is finally over.

* * *

 

I carry Jeri’s weightless body down the last steps of the building and through the lobby in my senseless arms. I’m numb to the lights that flash, the sirens that scream, the agents that run and the voices around me. All that I feel are the rays of the moon, warming the dry blood that covers my reborn skin and the steady beating of her heart. Doctors rush to try to rip Jeri’s body from my arms but I push them away. I walk through the crowd that parts for me until I am standing in front of Emmett.

“She will be okay” I say as I hand her over. He stares at both of us mortified, as if we are ghosts but quickly rests Jeri’s fragile body on a gurney.

“Tobin” I hear her barely whisper. I walk over to her and find her hand quickly.

“You’re awake” I ask as her eyes slowly open to meet mine.

“And you’re alive” She breathes in deep, sighing with relief.

“Thanks to you” I reply as I squeeze her hand.

“I love you” She says not wanting to wait any longer.

“I love you too” I reply as new sirens begin to blast. Emmett eyes me in a different direction and I look at Jeri who lets me go, “I will come find you” I assure as I begin to pull back.

“Never doubted it” She smiles softly before Emmett tends to her. Grabbing a spare blanket from his station, I walk back under the caution tape and to Mittag who stands by the stares, crowded by doctor and agents. No words are exchanged as we embrace tightly.

“It’s not over” She breathes with some fear that I feel within my own bones.

“It starts and ends within us…don’t shackle yourself to the outside world” I relay as I part from her.

Nadine comes up and we too exchange some words. They are taken away to be treated as I sit on the stairs of the building. Untouched, unmoved and somehow, unknown to my own feelings. The sound of her steps level my eyes to the ground and soon enough, she's embracing me. Her tears staining spills onto my skin, forming red splotches on the dry blood.

“I-never-please” I can’t understand her, but a part of me has no will left to stop her. I allow her to cry, to express herself until she has no more tears left to cry.

“Thank you, for taking care of my little one” I finally speak when she is calm in my arms.

“I would have never let anything happen to her”

“I know that Allie, I’ve always know you were true” I speak, stopping at the world true as I think to Mark’s word’s about those who are real. In specific to Allie. I pull away slightly to get a look at her face and see all her flaws but no a single thing that could label her as not real. Her eyes question mine but I shake my head no.

“You need to get checked out, you’ve lost so much blood and” She lets out a scream as she feels the wounds on my shoulder and stomach, “How are you still”

“Shhhh” I hush her as I pull her forward, “Now is not the time to ask, just…please” I beg as too cannot understand the vaccines powers.

“Miss Heath” The lead agent in charge clears his throat. I part ways with Allie as I walk with the agent, making sure that the blanket still covers my wounds. The agent stops and I know he’s about to explain something but I have no time to waste and no bushes to beat.

“It is okay Agent, I know needs to be done” I speak for him. He nods his head okay as he lifts the caution tape for me. Ducting under, I walk over to the bodies that are covered by blankets and turn to see Agents pushing paparazzi back. They quickly cover the scene and soon enough, they lift a blanket off. It is the man I let fall to his death.

“I killed him” I speak to the agent as I hunch down to look at what is left of his face. A second agent takes note while the main one covers him up again. We walk over to the body I know is Mark’s but raise my hand to stop the agent who readies himself to remove the blanket; “Mark Cline, head of the technology branch for Citadel…” I have to pause in order to truthfully dictate what he was as I am perplexed in the moment to label him the masked villain, “…participant in the rebellion, labeled leader by those in the leading group…death by…” I stop to at Mark’s abdominal region but see that my knife is no longer there, “by my doing.” I conclude as turn to look away.

“Well,” The agent begins, unsure of how to progress further “The building has been secured and most agents under his watch have been taken into custody. The World Leaders are already setting out plans to captures those who escaped. I don’t know much on the legal process at this moment as I’m just head of the scene but ugh, Kanatos President has ordered all units under Kardia’s defense to help aid in the search. Any questions don’t hesitate to ask, a car has been sent to escort you to the place of your choice…all regulations have been uplifted from your name as have all the charges pressed upon you dropped. I may recommend you visit the fourth tent at the front before going…” With that, he salutes me and walks away to continue his investigation while I stand there, disillusioned by his lifeless body. _I thought you dead Mark. I morned you, I had made peace but now, I must moron the death of the man I once knew all over again and come to peace with the man you became._ Taking one last long look on the stains of blood on the blanket that cover his body, I walk away in the direction of the fourth tent. The pain, the tears, everything…gone.

Slowly making my way to the tent, I check my wounds and see that they aren’t in good shape but somehow, I’m still standing. Covering my face as I enter the tent, I stay behind the doctors that crowd the subject. Making a circle around them, my eyes lay upon her as she urges the doctors away. Trying to convince them all that she is, indeed, as fine as she wishes to be.

“May we have a moment to ourselves” I startle everyone in the room. People gasp at my sight but quickly exit the tent, leaving me with Ali. She turns her head ever so slightly revealing her disbelief that I am still alive.

“How much do you know” I ask straight forward, not trying to burden her time with nonsense. _We have always been straight to each other._

“Enough to know that you will burden yourself with the decisions he made. He robbed you of a life…from day one you were his plan and”

“AND I ROBBED HUMANITY FROM ITS OPPORTUNITY” I interrupt her with anger but she doesn’t flinch. She simply shakes her head no in defeat.

“You revolutionized our regions Tobin, you evolved…we were not destined for an evolution had this not happened. And as much as I want to say that it’s all a lie, he was right…and that makes this so much harder to say… because in the end…it was worth it for everyone except you, and I’m sorry for that” Ali stops as she begins to cry. I allow the hot tears to fall from my own eyes, as I walk closer to Ali and kneel besides her bed.

“I fear that I’m dying Ali” I confess as I allow the blanket to fall from my shoulders. Revealing the state of my body and finally meeting her eyes since walking in. The choked cry she lets out makes me bite my lip in agony.

“Tob-but, I need to get you to” She begins to get up but I stop her,

“I injected the last vaccine into Jeri and she injected the last that I know of the serum into my arm and not my diamond…I am not strong enough to survive a diamond reconstruction and without my diamond, I am not compatible with any blood type”

“Except your own…” Ali thinks ahead. I nod yes and watch as she closes her eyes.

“We will find a way, we have to, I’ll find a cure, as soon as this little peanut pops out I will make sure”

“Stop”

“To find you a cure…you will not die, I won’t let that happen, not even” Before she can continue, I wrap my arms around her. Feeling her shake against me as she fights to push me off. Realizing she won’t succeed, she stops fighting and allows herself to cry. I wait until she’s done before allowing her to heal the wounds on my outer surface. I watch her as she works on my stomach first before moving on to my shoulder. She holds the tools with a gentleness that is far stretched from what she should be using but I speak none of it. She watches as I wash my blood off and helps me into the clean clothes I’ve called for. Zipping up the last coat of my outfit, I turn to meet Ali’s eyes. She extends her hand to my forehead, tracing the stitches that show before stepping away. As I begin to walk out, she halts me with words of wisdom.

“The world will need a lot going forward, but you are not in their debt. You can’t do everything, but you can do something…and that begins with the saving of yourself Tobin. You’ve saved the world”

“Until the lion gets a voice of its own, history will always glorify the hunter” I reply instead of turning to meet her eyes. With that, I leave her tent and head for the entrance of the building.

As I make my way through the crowd, eyes brush my surface with a wonder so deep, a confusion so profound and a fear so striking that it strengthens my defense. It is only until it is her eyes that undress my layers that I am at a loss of words.

She speaks none as her body crushes into mine, shaking hard against the hollowness of my figure. I fight hard to remain strong, not wanting to reveal the emptiness that I feel.

“My father”

“He did not deserve to be in the position that he was in…I am sorry for your loss Alex, I truly am” I interrupt her quivering voice, swallowing hard at my apology, “When you are apart of something greater than yourself you have to make sacrifices, you must be selfless…regardless of anything, including family” I finished as I bring her head into the crook of my neck.As her tears trace the line of my neck, I tense my body, closing my eyes and focusing on the sound of her heart.

“Jeri”

“It’s okay Alex we don’t”

“Thank you” She pulls back, grabbing my face to look at her. Forcing me to bare the emotions as she reads through my horrors.Her lips begin to shake as my eyes water and I lean in, not standing the feelings she forces. It’s soft, it’s hungry and in all its beauty, it’s broken. We part, resting our heads against on another. I run my thumb over her wet cheeks as she presses it into my palm.

“Theres nothing to thank Alex”

“Yes there is Tobin” She speaks up as she pulls away from me, “You literally just went through hell for the region! For Ali…for Jeri…you did that…for her-them, we are all”

“Would it make a difference if I had done it for me” I whisper as I drag my eyes to the front doors of the building. Alex opens her mouth to speak but finds herself at loss of her own thoughts, “Thats what I thought”

I begin to walk towards the doors but Alex’s hand grabs my wrist, turning me around. Our eyes meet, and it is tense. A familiar fire between my skin and hers, one I can recall that burned through our veins equally throughout the years of our hatred. Before she can speak, an agent calls to her name. We both turn to face the source of the voice and come across the lead agent of the crime scene.

“Jeri is in need of your presence, Miss” He explains. She looks at me and to the man, before nodding okay.

“Go, she needs you” I reply as I turn my back to her.

“It doesn’t change anything” She finally breaks as my hand reaches the door, “Maybe it would’ve had you never been through what you’ve gone through, but unfortunately…you have. And I’m sorry, from the bottom of my heart I apologize for all those who have used you. But at the same time…I’m simply another person who carries that burden of your pain. I wish I could speak for the world but I can only speak from my own emotions and I will confess that I do not care why you did it, I just care that you and Jeri are alive. And call it selfish, but I am done caring for anything besides my happiness…If you did this for you, Tobin, I am equally, actually, twice as fucking proud and thankful because the demons you’ve been fighting are ones that I would never wish upon anyone, including those behind all this. So, no Tobin, it doesn’t change anything” Alex finishes. She lingers a few seconds to allow it to sink in before her footsteps disappear beyond the sirens.

* * *

 

I wait until the agents leave the roof top to walk to the edge where Mark and I fell. Movingunder the caution tape, I take a seat at the edge, allowing my feet to dangle over the roof as I stare into the nights sky.

“What a beautiful night” I breathe out into the cool air as I skim the edges of the mountain line. Reaching my right hand into my coats pocket, I pull out a USB covered in Mark’s dry blood. I hold it between my finger tips, scanning and admiring the outside of it before looking down at where his body landed. When Mark extended his hand to mine, it was not in intention to be saved, but rather to save my life. He slipped the USB before letting go. Before explaining or even trying to explain what is it or what I was to do with it. And while the questions pile up in my head since he put it there, I can’t will myself to the answers it contains.

“Tobin” Alex’s voice brings me out of my thoughts. I slip the USB into my pocket and quickly stand. Our eyes quickly attach and she holds sympathy in them.

“Hey” I respond a little more delayed than normal. She offers a weak smile as she makes her way over to me. Our arms find each other as we both let out breathes we were holding.

“I’m sorry that I took so long to answer your question…I just, it hurt a little to learn that I didn’t realize that it was more than just Jeri and Ali but I understand and I want you to know that I love you, unconditionally Tobin” She breathes with tears in her eyes. Unlike last time, I don’t want to push off the emotions and instead, confine in Alex.

“Theres so much going on in my head and so little strength left to fight through the mess. And in all honesty, I don’t want to” I breathe as I look up at the stars, “I thought that ending this would bring peace to my being but it only has made it worse. And don’t get me wrong, a part of me is relieved that the world can rest tonight but another part of me envy’s that everyone gets to rest except for me” I cry as she holds me, “I hate everything” I begin to break down and she lets me. As my tears dry up, she pulls away to get a look at me once again.

“The best part of you is that you could set the world on fire but the flames would burn of warmth through winter rain, your light shine beyond the horizons of mercy and even then, your madness is what would give this” Alex takes my face, gently turning it to look back at the mountains, “you give this beauty. So stop fronting what you feel and just feel Tobin, I have you now. I’ll protect you now. Until I can no longer” Alex whispers as she pulls my head to rest on her chest. I let out a deep sigh in her arms, allowing the cool air to swift through me, allowing it to cleanse me of my emotions if only for tonight.

“I love you too” I finally whisper into the night sky as Alex heart skips a beat. _Lord please, don’t abandon me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, thank you thank you thank you. We have finally arrived and I could not feel more loved, blessed and thankful in anything. I'm proud of this. 
> 
> Comment reactions, questions, concerns... anything. I want to soak in this piece forever!


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